Little Faerie

Two words... SUSHI PIZZA! Yeah I know, sushi is Japanese... but two Chinese women taught me how to make it.

It isn't true. Bonobos have sex for pleasure... they are rather promiscuous and don't really differentiate gender either. Despite common perception, even some cats like it. I had a female cat who liked... er... getting frisky.

In those circumstances Sarah, I wouldn't expect any verbal privacy. However, it was calm and quiet, and no-one was rushing around to treat patients. I would have liked them to at least use hushed tones, the same level which I told them at, if they must discuss that in front of everyone. They were in the hallway, and I was in the back of a triage room. Real walls between us. I shouldn't have been able to hear them so very clearly. I'm not a specimen, I'm a human, and I deserve at least some level of respect. I would have understood if they were within 20 feet of me. What's done is done... so I will let it rest. They are only human too. In some cases, electroshock therapy works and it does still remain a useful last resort treatment, but it is still over-used, especially in aggressive and psychotic patients. I have seen some of the persuasion techniques used on desperate patients... in a few of those cases I can't say I believe it was truly of their own free will. Then again, everywhere in the world you will find a few cases in all kinds of medical treatment where a patient is treated poorly, or coerced into something he or she would never consent to if sound of mind. Heck, I don't know how many times I was told I would take this or that medicine or I would be refused treatment. I got very sick from two of them. The entire health care system is broken from the inside out, and the new legislation will only make it worse. One reason I don't sue... it worsens the overall problem. Oh I think about it sometimes, when I know I have been wronged, but ultimately it will cause more problems for others, and I don't want the money. I just want an apology, the wrongdoer to be punished appropriately, and fair treatment. Lol spoonchicken... It is indeed la la land.

I really wish I could get ahold of some of the old white ones. I liked them so much better than these new ones. The padding in the crotch of the new girls ones is barely wider than two inches. Crikey, I can get a poise pad that's thicker!

Gay people might even be the very thing that saves us from overpopulation. Homosexuality occurs in nature, in all types of animal. In the Christian mythos, God created Nature. Therefore, by that logic, God created homosexuals. If he made them that way, why would he be against them? Just saying. I don't understand these preachy types and their flawed logic at all.

Kinky Baloney... I like it. Although it made me think about real bologna, which led to a craving for braunschweiger. (they're the same color) Just what I needed lol. I cannot think of one off the top of my head, but I have a few. I'll forget about trying to think of them and it will come to me. I'll get back to you on that.

I don't even have to say anything, you guys already have it covered. How come it never occurs to these people that other religions, and other ways of life, are just as valid? Hey, a little lust applied in the appropriate manner never hurt anyone. It's NATURAL. To fight against it is UNNATURAL, and by their own line of thinking, against their God's will. Within my church, we have a rule. AN IT HARM NONE, DO AS THOU WILL! If you are doing your thing and not hurting anyone else including yourself, what is the harm? I'm so glad I never have to believe there is some hot and scary place I will burn in forever just because people tell me it's not OK to do the things that are natural and even positive for the species. If you do... well, good for you. It's your life. I'm much happier without all that. Personal responsibility is my motto. In my personal beliefs, you pay for what you do, here and now.

Actually, we do pay for that health care thank you very much! My boyfriend and I pay over 20,000 a year in taxes and social security. The ONLY reason I am on state insurance is because until we are married, his employer won't cover me. And I DO work, just not your traditional 9-5 job. I have a home based business of my own, and I am also a full time mom and battling back to back physical illnesses. If you don't think that is work, buddy I'll be GLAD to give you a week in my shoes. Before you go making assumptions about me, you might wanna check your damn facts.

Didn't think there was any need? Have they had THEIR heads checked? Great good gods what do they use for minds, dried peas? Of course, since I moved here, I have been completely unable to get mental health care, as the only facility that takes state insurance never, ever answers their phone. Always get a busy signal, no matter what time of day. It would be nice if I could get an up to date listing of their hours at least so I can find it in person! I ran out of medicine, thank goodness I'm stable and in a good situation. My case files never got transferred, lost in the aether, so to them, I don't exist. My case manager ditched on me last winter, and never transferred my paperwork to the last clinic I was supposed to go to. The doctor worked at both at the time, so I was still seen up until June. I tried many times to initiate the file transfer, and was always told "right away! We'll send it over this afternoon... tomorrow... etcetera I can't believe it hasn't been done already!" Only it would never get there. Somebody sat on her aft all day eating donuts and gossiping and never bothered to do her job. So, I am lost in the cracks. On the bright side, I am learning natural ways of balancing out. Thanks to my close relationship with my body most of the time I see things coming far enough ahead that I can adjust life accordingly so that it does not make a big impact. That is ultimately the goal therapists and medicine are supposed to achieve anyway, symptom regulation and learning to adapt properly. My last doctor always did say I surprised him often with my self-awareness and willingness to learn and adapt. I told him I didn't see any other way to survive the kind of crap I've been through. He did everything he could to see that I got well, trusted me enough to make decisions about what would and would not go in my body, including defying what his nurses told me he would do when I called in to get 3 months of refills to go on vacation. They said "he doesn't do that without a visit, and you aren't supposed to have that many refills of (X)." I politely and firmly asked them to relay my exact message, and sure enough, I had my refills in 24 hours... for 4 months. One in a million doctor... this is the one reason I'd like to be back in Missouri. I doubt I'll ever find one as good here.

That's what we do... I hate freeway driving but am good at navigation when given instructions.

I can pretty much get around anywhere in Monrovia, and I can at least not get completely lost in Arcadia or Duarte, but that's about it. Anywhere else, and my boyfriend drives. Back home it wasn't so complicated. One city about every 20 miles or so. Memorizing all the cities you need to visit in a given year wasn't too hard. Here, it's such an urban clusterf*ck, I don't know if I'll ever memorize everything.

Don't know where that is. I'm over in Monrovia... and I'm new to the area. I've only been here since June and only had a car for a month so I'm not too familiar with what's around. It's like a foreign country to me lol.

No witnesses I can track, as everyone in there was a stranger. My boyfriend was taking care of my daughter for me so was not in there. No dinero for a lawyer even if I wanted to push it either. I still haven't finished my divorce for the same reason. Everything costs, and out here, it costs at least triple what I'm used to. Seriously... I had the same amount of space in my apartment in Missouri for $350, I pay $1200 here. Granted, I also have more money than I did there, but still. Nothing I can feasibly do. I won't be returning to that hospital. We went to one in Pasadena in hopes of better care. Apparently, we should have stayed local.

Ugh... I hate going in to Pasadena and that's the only DMV I know of nearby. This is going to be funnnnn.

OH crap that's three weeks away?! I haven't found where to register here yet. And there are some really important ones here that need my help! I thought I had more time... I've been sick and time has flown.

Thank you Sarah. Can you believe that while walking down the hallway asshat gyno had the nerve to ask how I got my insurance since "it's very hard for a healthy young woman to get" and when I said I have a mental disability, I was stopped and he demanded an explanation. What does the type of emotional disorder have to do with the health of my reproductive organs??? Afterward is when he treated me like I'm stupid and crazy and accused me of lying and not knowing anything about my physical conditions. I am a very self aware person. I know when something is wrong and I know what my body should and shouldn't be doing. Before I realized how bad at math I am I wanted to be a doctor and was fascinated with the human body and what it can do. I'm not giving up until I find a good one (two, in this case). If I hadn't been forced to sign a malpractice waiver to be seen you bet I'd have a lawyer on him. I hope other women do not have to endure that crap and somebody sues his pants off. I did have to take one of my stronger painkillers last night that I have saved away for when severe pain strikes (I know, I know, they're not for that ailment, but when you have to get up early, you need to sleep, and it eased my symptoms long enough to do that) Thankfully, the medicine I started on yesterday is already working, I'm much less uncomfortable and the AZO is enough for pain. I can leave the house with just a pad and be OK for a few hours. I'm honestly glad that at least the ER nurses listened and I got treated. One woman was removed by security, when she obviously needed to be admitted to the psych ward. She was uninsured and told to go to the county hospital. Same with the broken nose woman, they said she had to go to the county hospital to have her nose set the next day. Gave her a tylenol, had a social worker talk to her about pressing charges on her ex, and sent her home. I didn't think a hospital could do that to an uninsured patient. Times are changing. Very, very glad to have insurance.

If the police were our parents then a lot of us would be taken away by social services for being mistreated and neglected! Some police are good, but some are just as rotten and dirty as the criminals they lock up, and smaller minority even more so because they abuse and lock up innocent people. The system is broken. Realistic analogy though... Also, I'd like to see McDonald's play-place big enough for us!

Walmart's employee EVERYTHING is crap. I cannot imagine working there... I've had several family members do so and they left as soon as they found another job. Don't get me started on them lol... I can go on for hours. Hope you find something better in the future!

*is watching all the cards fall down* Your card analogy nails it on the head. That is exactly what they've done. I feel even worse for those people who will be stuck with the government insurance. I only have to suck it up another year, since I'm marrying someone with great insurance, and his company doesn't discern a difference whether you have pre-existing conditions or not! Unfortunately, not many people get that lucky. Some days, I weep for all that is happening to our once beautiful country.

There are merits in both a dry diaper and a wet one. And really, among AB's, AK's, DL's, and LG's, none of us are really "average". I go months without wearing, then I'll wear for a couple days, or a week, and not touch them again for a few days, weeks, or even months. Once I went almost a whole year. I very much love a nice thick fluffy dry diaper, and I'll keep mine that way as long as I can (sometimes I'll even pull it down and be a big girl using the potty!) but 9 times out of 10 I eventually give it a thorough wetting (or two or three, if I have Bambinos, Abena's, or something else with boosters added), and I enjoy a wet, swelled up diaper for a little while, so long as it doesn't smell stale, leak, or get cold. Once one of those three happens, I can't wait for either a nice fluffy dry one or to have my panties back, whichever is the current mood. When waking up in the morning after having sleep-wet, I want out of them fairly quick... then again, my morning ones are pretty soggy and by the time I wake, kind of itchy sometimes too. So, the answer to To Pee or Not To Pee is... it depends! lol haha I know bad diaper pun. <---Queen of Lame Jokes

The problem I run into with that, Kitten, is that to be treated anywhere around here you have to sign malpractice waivers unless you're literally going to die right there if your aren't treated that minute. And I am still on Medi-Cal (California's Medicaid) until I get married next year, since employers don't count partners that aren't married. Therefore, I don't have many choices. With the new healthcare overhaul, many doctors stopped taking new patients in order to avoid taking on any new Medicaid patients, because the government pays them even less than they used to now. Often these doctors will ask what insurance first, before telling you if they will take you. I had a great Gyno when I lived in Missouri... kind, caring, listened, tried everything he could think of to help me, and never doubted what I experienced was real and distressing. I'm still in his files... when I move back there you bet I'm going back to him until he retires! Still no luck getting a GP who isn't a jerk though, here or there. Had one years ago in the Ozarks but moved too far away to see him under my insurance plan. Another listener who really cared about his patients, and would even stay after a bit if you truly needed to be seen that day and the schedule was full. Coincidentally, that one good GP was who referred me to the good gyno.

My internalist checked for stones when I saw him a couple weeks ago for my adrenal fatigue and found out about some vitamin deficiencies it was causing, and at that time I didn't have the infection yet, and no stones. I assume since my immune system is still under the weather, that normal activities caused the infection, as I haven't had any tub baths or used spermicides or anything else unusual. here's hoping for a speedy recovery, and finding a new gyno that won't traumatize and belittle me. I've had some bad gynecologists before, but this was one of those "how the hell did he get a medical license" kind of experiences. No woman should ever leave her gyno's office crying. Ever.

Today I had a lovely little ER visit. Last week, I saw a new Gynecologist, who not only traumatized me by telling me that my pain is all in my head, that I was lying when I said I couldn't take certain medicines, that my Internalist misdiagnosed my ulcer and it was "nothing", assumed my three miscarriages were abortions and I had to correct him 3 times, and looked at me in shock when I said my tubes were tied, but missed a very important thing that ANY gyno should notice... I have a UTI! After two hours of being unable to leave the bathroom because of excruciating pain and constant dripping, my boyfriend decides I should go to the ER instead of trying to find a new doctor and wait days. I've been having little leaks in my plumbing for a week, but only today was it super painful and constant. Painful is an understatement really... more like peeing fire mixed with glass shards. Those of you who have had a bad one understand completely I'm sure! Anyway, so I switch my poise pad out for a goodnite so I can safely leave the house, and we get there, wait the usual hour to get in, and I explain to the intake workers and the nurse quietly in front of strangers about it hurting to pee, the constant urges and accidents, and I couldn't leave the house without protective garments. That was bad enough, but later, jammed in a single triage room with three other patients with one curtain amongst us all for privacy, I overhear a nurse use my name, and tell another person, presumably a coworker and to be fair probably another nurse, about feeling sorry for me, and "she can't even hold it, she keeps having accidents". Ok, I'm a DL, and its all fine and dandy when I'm wearing a diaper for pleasure and I use it. Not a big deal at all. But to be completely out of control of my urine, and have a stranger talk about it in a whole room of other strangers was totally mortifying. I almost started crying. I never saw a doctor, none of us did, even the woman with the broken nose, or the one with a broken elbow. The little boy with stitches in his head was the only one and that's because they had a pediatric surgeon come in. I don't think they had one on call, just a Nurse Practitioner. I just can't believe they talked about my personal problem out loud, in front of all these people, using my name, and it's not like they were talking to me about it. Discussing it here is one thing... but there it was very humiliating to me, and not in any kind of good way at all. Every patient in that whole place didn't need to know I can't stop peeing on myself, and I certainly didn't want pity, just relief. The bright side is now I am being treated with antibiotics, although the only thing for pain was the prescription version of AZO that I already have a box of at home. I know the drill, gatorade and cranberry juice, take my medicine, etcetera... been there done that. If anybody has any more tips on dulling the pain I'd love to hear them, as I don't know any that help. I have come to the conclusion that medical care in Southern California sucks. Has anybody else ever been embarrassed by a nurse like that before?

Along that line, Victoria's Secret would carry all the diapers and plastic panties you could imagine, from cute and babyish to racy sexy ones. And little girl style trainer bra and panty sets too!

Tris, I'm usually a very nice person, but I'm going to be blunt with you. You're talking like a prick. So, single women with kids shouldn't get a chance to have a normal life with a partner? Because we had kids we're worthless? I don't put out on the first date. Or the second. When I met my ex-husband, he was wonderful to me. After we had a child, he became verbally and mentally abusive, then kicked me out for someone else. He got her pregnant too, then kicked her out when their son was 2 months old. Is that my fault? Because my ex-husband turned into a mean, selfish deadbeat dad who won't bother taking care of his own children, that makes me a bad, undateable person? I THINK NOT! Life as a single mom really sucks, especially when you had planned to stay married the rest of your life, then you get suddenly thrust out into the world alone to fend for yourself and take care of a child too, and deal with considerable hardship to try and get back on your feet AND having to find a new life partner. If anything, that's all the MORE reason one should give a woman with a child a chance, because she'll be more loving and grateful for whatever you contribute to the relationship, and no I don't mean supporting her financially either. Thank goodness I found a good man who not only loves me for everything I am, but loves my daughter too and treats her as his own. Even though we have a child, we still have a normal healthy sex life, and it's really not that hard to hide private sexual objects... that's what a locked drawer is for. I don't know what your damage is, but not all women are evil, conniving bitches whose sole intent is to screw men over. Some of us are actually really nice and caring, and through giving people the benefit of the doubt often get metaphorically shat on. That doesn't mean we have bad taste. Lighten up a bit eh?