The Battle at Bedtime

[FatherFish]

Bedtimes were the worst.

Eleanor knew this to be fact, as she stared up at the clock that hung on the pastel pink walls of her nursery. The cartoon cat on the wall was almost taunting her with its Cheshire smile, as its eyes swayed back and forth with every ticking second. While the cat did not mind having the hours of the day plastered on its belly, Eleanor felt her gut sink as she saw the time. Seven-thirty. Bedtime was upon her.

The fact that this disturbed her so much only fueled her further shame. She was a grown woman. She was! Even if everything surrounding her tried to prove the opposite. There was her room, drowned in pastel colors from the striped walls to the fluffy pink carpet. There was her toy chest, filled with plushies and blocks and other juvenile excuses for entertainment. There was her closet, ready to burst with humiliating outfits. Everything from rompers to onesies to overalls to frilly dresses that belong on baby dolls. Nothing she wore allowed any sense of maturity.

Nothing at all…

Eleanor kicked her splayed legs in frustration, causing a chorus of crinkles to erupt from her undergarments.

There were diapers. The ones she was forced to wear at all hours of the day. The ones that puff out with an obvious silhouette. The ones that managed to peek under every skirt, giving the whole world a sneak preview of her underwear. But that wasn’t right. Calling them underwear would be an insult to real underwear. But real underwear was off limits, so Eleanor had to settle for the poofy imitations. Every day, from sunrise to bedtime.

Eleanor’s blood turned to ice as she heard the door creak open.

“Elly baby!” A booming and carefree voice sang, “It’s beddy-bye time! Let’s get you changed and ready for your trip to dreamland.”

It was Mommy. The giant woman who was responsible for her new life.

She had a real name. It just wasn’t one Eleanor was allowed to use. Many punishment sessions made that abundantly clear. She was so commanding. So dominant. So mature. She was all these things, and she hid it very well. Behind the veil of a sweet, innocent homemaker. Eleanor had not known what she had done to deserve to cross this woman’s path. In truth, there was no greater reason than fulfilling her desires. Elly was like a rare doll at a flea market. A little treasure too cute to pass up.

So that’s what Mommy did. She took her. Far away from the troubles of her adult life. To be fawned over, like other countless Littles. By the Amazons. What other outcome was there? They were bigger, smarter, and had so much love to give. Amazons could not help but target these affections to Littles. Mommy came into Eleanor’s life, smothered her with all the love she never asked for. And she did it all with a smile on her face.

Mommy was already well dressed for bedtime. Curlers rolled through her blonde locks. A soft pink nightgown that hugged her generous proportions. She looked ready to down a cup of chamomile tea and drift off herself. Now, seven-thirty was too early a bedtime for most grown-ups. Eleanor knew that, from back when she considered herself part of the same flock. Days when she was overworked and found herself crashing asleep on the couch right around five. Days long past her now. Maybe Mommy was having one of those days herself. Elly had no business in knowing, or in asking.

“But Mommy, I’m not tired yet. Can I please stay up just a little bit longer?” Eleanor pouted her lips and looked up toward the mountain of a woman with her best pair of babydoll eyes. It was a weak gambit, she knew that. Eleanor was only delaying the inevitable. The gambit was more for Eleanor than anyone else. Eleanor wanted to prove that she still had some fight left in her. Even after the countless spankings, hours in corner-time, and mouthfuls of castor oil, she still had some fight left in her.

Mommy shook her head and wagged a finger. “Uh-uh. We don’t want a cranky wee one on our hands.” Her tone stayed cheery, but Eleanor knew that her words were final and absolute.

“But Mommy, I really—Mmmph!” Her protests were cut short as she was met with the familiar taste of a pacifier bulb. The rubber invader inflated and expanded in Eleanor’s mouth, ensuring that it could only be removed by a grown-up—a status Mommy had revoked from Eleanor long ago.

“It sounds like my little girl has a lot of big ideas today.” Mommy chided, her tone becoming much firmer, “But bedtime cannot be pushed back any further. So, she will just have to keep them to herself until morning.”

Elanor sunk her head, now swiftly defeated. She allowed herself to be lifted and cradled by the giant woman. Eleanor was the Little, after all. There was no strategy in the world that would help someone of her stature trounce an Amazon. None that yielded results, other than being scolded and having one’s bottom swatted repeatedly.

However, any late-night randevu would not be complete with a quick visit to the changing table. The Amazon laid Eleanor on her back and prodded at the girl’s soggy padding. “Looks like someone had a run-in with the sog-monster,” Mommy giggled, a dainty hand clasped over her mouth. Eleanor could only lie back and blush. Teasing was customary, and never once did it not feel demoralizing. As Mommy finished assembling the changing supplies, Eleanor looked up and came face-to-face with a crinkling adversary.

To call the diaper thick would be an understatement. It was a monstrous brick of fluff. The deep blue color was matched with designs of crescent moons and cartoon whales. A very appropriate design choice, as the thing looked prepared to soak up an ocean. The padding effectively stated that Mommy’s expectations of a dry night from her Little were as low as possible. Were a fairy tale, just like the ones she sometimes read to Elleanor before bed.

There was simply nothing she could do. With expert aim, the beastly padding dove straight under Elanor’s bum. Her legs were dropped, and she rested on the impossibly soft surface below. Before she could even protest (with a pacifier-filtered scream), her nether region was cloaked in a cloud of powder. Any nasty smells that made their way into her diaper would be overpowered by scents of sweet vanilla. One of Mommy’s giant hands got to work, and liberally rubbed the powder in. Along with a heap of anti-rash cream, which had proved quite effective in the past. Sticky tapes scrunched and were pulled together, sealing the colossal padding. Eleanor felt her gait spread as the diaper closed, her movement now greatly hindered. Even rolling herself over would be a true test of strength.

“Much better. Mommy knows how much her baby loves a nice, dry diaper.” The Amazon said, smiling softly. Was she truly innocent and well-meaning or did the act of controlling the smaller woman give or a sadistic sense of joy? Eleanor had no way of knowing, and neither theory gave her closure. “It’s going to be warm tonight, so we will skip over the jammies for tonight.” Mommy wormed off all for the little one’s evening wear, leaving Elly exposed completely, save for her padded privates.

Of course. Babies did not care much for modesty, right? Eleanor was not averse to sleeping topless. But when that call was being made by another woman who did not even see her as grown, it became more humiliating than liberating. Even with her chest exposed to the elements, she felt less like an adult, and more like a hapless toddler. The crinkly mass on her butt and the rubber nipple in her mouth made it all too obvious.

As they approached the gigantic crib, with its high bars and taunting mobile, Eleanor felt a bead of sweat run down her head. It was okay, she was a trooper. She had nothing to worry about. There was nothing she needed to feel guilty about. Eleanor had been on her best behavior. She hadn’t gotten into any trouble. She kept most of her backtalk to herself. She gave none of the other Amazons in the neighborhood a reason to complain. She had earned a quiet night. Did Mommy see that? It was the only question that truly mattered.

The bulb in Elly’s pacifier was deflated, allowing her to suckle of her own volition. She set her Little down in the crib, the smile on her giant face never wavering. “Well, I believe someone has had a very busy day.” The Amazon narrated; her voice sounding almost melodic. “I know you’ve had a rough time adjusting to everything, but I believe we are over the hill now.”

The Amazon paused, as if she could feel the intensity of Elly’s worries and wanted to savor every second. “That said, there is still room for improvement. But that’s okay. I love you and I know you are trying your best. I just need to give you a push in the proper direction.”

Mommy clicked the mobile on, allowing it to spin to life. The mobile’s trinkets spun in a lazy stir, glowed like stars in a plastic planetarium. A dull and warn lullaby played on, being the perfect soundtrack to Elly’s growing fear. “This should help you sleep better. I know how much my Elly baby loves this song.” Those were the last words Mommy said, before leaving Elly to deal with her long night.

They had to be taunting her, Elly figured. The dull plastic trinkets that spun on the mobile strings. The fat bumblebee and the ladybug smiled high above the helpless Little. The rocket ship rocked on towards the crescent moon, reminding Elly every night of how trapped she was. Every night. But the nights when the mobile sang were the worst.

Every night, whenever that song played, Eleanor would lose something. A little bit of focus. A little bit of coordination and memory. A small piece of herself. A small piece of control. Small enough not to notice, until it was too late. Her mind was being toyed with, but she was told she was simply going through big changes. The Amazon saw only an improvement. Not growing up, only growing down.

The note was coming, she knew it.

“I can do this.” Elly thought, although even she was doubting herself. It was a war of attrition.  She had to ration out her willpower, her reminders that she could still have an adult life to return to. But her reserves were running dry, and Mommy had so much more endurance. Amazons were built for endurance, for putting up with fussy mouths and wiping away teary eyes and swatting naughty bottoms until their hands had calluses.

The lullaby was halfway through now.

“I can do this. I am a grown woman.” She repeated the anthem in her head countless times. All the mental encouragement she could muster did not change the fact that she was suckling on her pacifier like a madwoman with an oral fixation. It did not change the fact that she was stuck in a crib, with only a diaper to cover herself, because the lady that clothes her and feeds her and changes her said so. She wanted to believe it. She needed to believe it. She needed to believe it and hold out for something. Hold out for what? “Hold out for what?”

Her least favorite verse was about to play.

What was she even holding out for anymore? For help to come. It was an idea yet to be stolen from her. The idea, at its core, was laughable. How many Littles were waiting for the same thing? How many had their prayers answer? The odds were stacked against her, higher than the bars of her crib. She was holding out for herself. But that was laughable as well. Elly’s views were, to simplify matters, at odds with reality. How did Elly view herself? A trapped young woman, with everything to lose? But how did Mommy see her? Baby. How did the daycare workers see her? How did the doctors and nurses and general population see her? Baby. Was it time to call it quits? Elly wasn’t getting any older. “But…I’m not a baby?”

First came the high note.

How did babies act? Did they whine and fuss when things did not go their way? Did they go on stroller rides during the day, play in the sandbox during and after school? Did they wait for bigger, more mature people to change their diapers, because they couldn’t use the bathroom for one reason or another? What goal was Elly working towards, anyway? She certainly was not on the road of adulthood, given her current track record. But the road paved to be Mommy’s baby? She was steadily on track. “N-no! I can’t be a baby! I need to go! I need to go home! I need—”

Then came the low note.

The impact was immediate. A torrent of warm mush rushed to the back of her diaper. There was no control, no stopping. All Elly could do was lie on her stomach and support the effort. Elly’s face scrunched up into a look of concentration and despair—a phenomenon that Mommy identified as “potty face”. Elly had to be grateful she was wearing a diaper of such thickness, because she was soundly putting it to the test tonight. The stinky muck caused the diaper to sag and strain for all its worth. As her nightly messing came to a halt, the divide between the strong, confident adult, and the whimpering tot in a crib could not be more obvious. The proof was in the padding. For Elly, like any other baby, any other Little, the next course of action was instinctual.

“WWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!! MMMMAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMAAAAAA!!!!!!!!”

It was the tell-tale crying of any helpless Little in dire need of a diaper change. Elly finally figured out what she needed, screaming it to high heavens. Luckily, Elly’s baby monitor was on standby, and the call was answered by her favorite listener.

“Calm down, calm down. Mommy’s here, Elly-darling! Let me dry those tears.” Mommy sauntered through the door, as sweet and caring and innocent as ever. She clicked the mobile off and picked the flailing, wailing Little. Mommy gave an exaggerated sniff and an overdramatic gasp. “Oh dear! Did the baby make a boom-boom during bedtime? Shh, it’s okay. Mommy will have a fresh diaper on your mushy-tushy in no time.” Mommy reassured, completely undisturbed. Mommy knew that cleaning Elly’s stinky butt came with the territory. Trips to the changing table were a worthy price to pay to have such a precious little girl.

“Pee-yew! That is one yucky diaper!” Mommy exclaimed, fanning a hand as she peeled back the tapes of her little one’s poopy diaper, rekindling Elly’s sobs. “Aww, don’t cry, Elly-sweetie. It is perfectly natural for babies to go potty in their pampers. Although, this certainly puts an end to our potty-training arguments, doesn’t it?” She chuckled, and continued the process of changing Elly’s diaper, business as usual. “It’s a good thing we didn’t listen to you and try to get a training potty. It would have been a complete waste of money! Yes it would, yes it would!” The giant woman wiped her hands and tickled the broken girl on her tummy, converting the sobs to giggles. That was how babies acted, after all. Crying one moment and cooing the next. It was a sweet moment between the pair—just the kind that Mommy had been vying so long for. The kind that she knew her, and Elly’s future, would be full of. The woman finished securing a fresh diaper on her baby, happy to see her in a better mood, nuzzling her closely. “Such a good baby! Now, how about a special snack before you head back to dreamland?”

Elly nodded, like any sweet little baby would. The kind that suckles on pacifiers because they don’t want to stop. The kind that has big nightly accidents in their diapers and are helpless to change them. The kind that existed in countless homes the world over, waiting for Mommy and Daddy to swoop in and save them.

Mommy sat down to give Elly her big special snack. It didn’t take long for her to latch onto it. She was a natural. The Amazon could only smile, satisfied. While a training potty would have been a clear waste of money, the breast pump she bought on sale would no doubt see much use in the future. Elly’s second wind was short lived, however. The Little had fallen to sleep before even reaching the second nipple. This quick meal would ensure that Elly’s second diaper would turn soggy during the night. No issue, neither party would be bothered by this. Elly was a baby now, having no right or sense to mind either way. Mommy was Mommy. She got exactly what she wanted, and nothing was going to change that.

So much progress was made in one night. Bedtimes were going to be much easier in the future.

***

Elly clacked her dolls together, making kissy sounds with her mouth. Prince Piggly and Ms. Dotty were supposed to be married, but Elly still needed to give them an extra push. Bedtime was surely approaching and spent all day getting every toy ready for the ceremony. She couldn’t really tell how soon Mommy would be here to stop her fun, but she had a feeling. Grown-ups apparently had something called “clocks” to tell them what time was. She knew she had one in her room, and even tried asking the wall-kitty with numbers on its belly for advice. No such luck so far. The door creaked open, and Elly whipped her head around instinctually.

“Elly-baby!” Mommy sang, smiling brightly, “It’s beddy-bye time! Who’s ready for a trip to dreamland?”

“I am!” Elly proudly announced, her arms outstretched, begging to be hoisted high into the air. Of course she was ready! The sudden and timely appearance of her beloved Mommy instantly made any other possible reaction vanish. “Upsies, upsies!”

“Alright, alright. Come here, you little bossy britches.” Mommy lifted the eager girl, landing a big smooch on the cheek of her giggling Little. Her nose wiggled, before pressing a hand on Elly’s drooping diaper. “Just as I thought. Absolutely soaked. Baby can’t go to bed with a soggy pamper on, no ma’am!”

Truthfully, Elly had no way of telling. One minute, she would be playing or eating or watching cartoons. The next, she would on her back, getting her undies torn off and replaced, before returning to business as usual. The only difference was that Mommy brought out the big guns for bedtime. The thick nighttime diaper still spread Elly’s legs out wide, but she had plenty of time to adjust. Cumbersome for playtime, but perfectly acceptable for napping.

“It’s supposed to be quite chilly tonight. Winter sure did creep up on us.” Mommy thought aloud, while Elly was content to suckle on her thumb. Soon enough, Elly was dressed up in a soft pink footed sleeper. The buttons on the backdoor strained against the heavy-duty diaper but would hopefully last the night. Mommy descended Elly into her crib, leaving her with a kiss on the forehead. “Good night, my perfect little angel. Sleep well.” Before leaving, Mommy lit up the mobile, but chose not to turn the sound on. Her baby was already perfect at falling soundly asleep.

Elly didn’t need more instruction than that. She turned over onto her stomach, still suckling away at her thumb, and let sleep soon overtake her. There was one more pressing order of business, however, before Elly could sleep comfortably. One, just like playtime, that required a Little’s push, which she was happy to provide.

A wave of mush made way into Elly’s diaper. It hadn’t even been ten minutes since she left the changing table, but this Little had no sense of time anyway. While the diaper was holding up fine, the sleeper’s limits were being pushed until finally—

*POP*

*POP*

The sleeper’s rear flap popped open, letting the loaded diaper sag and hang freely. As the full diaper settled, Elly let out a sigh of relief, and resumed suckling her thumb before drifting off to sleep.

There was no fussing, no fighting. No need for punishment or auditory adjustments. Just a happy baby girl, sleeping in her crib. Just the way her mommy had envisioned. Everything was alright now. Being in diapers was no big deal. Being a baby was no big deal.

Bedtimes were no big deal.

[keith60]

good story