Am I becoming more of an baby?!

[Little Cub Pants]

I'm finding it SO MUCH easier to get into Little space the older I get. It's gotten to the point where I genuinely feel wittle more and more an day at a time now! Has anyone else NOTICED this over time?!???????☺️??♥️?????♥️???? I'm also finding my desire for Diapers, baby bottles, baby wipes, baby powder, rattles, pacifiers, and baby clothes gradually increasing too!??????♥️???♥️?♥️?????????

[KPAXOR1987]

I can't answer the question?. My situation is diffrent than probally 99.9% of people on here?. But I will go off what alot of people say and that is the more comfortable with who you are the harder it is to hold to the expectations of anyone but yourself. So in essence it means anyone that has a hard time going into little space is acting like a adult or actually identifies as a adult, the ones that are acting like a adult and Identifies as a say a 4yo will eventually end up haveing the true them breaking out in front and slipping into little space at the worse times, when they try to control it and act while trying to make themselves believe they are something they are not it gets to a point where it causes disruptions. 

I know you saw D-------'s post where she thought she was being punished for trying to be a adult?. She wasn't being punished just reminded she wasn't a adult and the rules were there for her benifit, apparently she wasn't ready to be a adult and was pretending to be something she wasn't and I decided to let her prove she was a adult and she accidently regressed into her 2yo alt off her system ?.  There is a reason Essiah kept the triggers from the other alts from working and if D------ were a adult she would be still active and P!553d as all h377 right now for being treated that way, however she inadverently triggered her 2yo alt by trying to act like J---- and she also did it way before she was supposed to so it could be because she got sick or it could be because she needed little time and kept trying to act like a adult instead ?

The answer is the more you act like not yourself the harder it is to hide your true self. If it is pretending then it can end at any time and it won't reoccur until you want it to. If it isn't pretending and you keep acting like something you are not it will get harder to control the times your true self slips out. 

My situation is quite diffrent than everyone else though as I have way more than 1 person to my host system and each of those people have even more people on their host list. 

I haven't made it longer than a alt's alt taking the front yet and think it is probally impossible. I also don't ever want it to happen that is why I the host try to cater to them all and my system has safeguards to assure their needs are met ??.

Currently <host(witheld) ,Kpaxor, Essiah, Yashua(I'm almost never out), Ezeikial(I'm almots never out either), and M---A---- (I'm only out after a break in the cycles for the following 12hrs to stablize the system) ?.  

[KPAXOR1987]

2 hours ago, Jesse The BabySpiderBoy said:

I'm finding it SO MUCH easier to get into Little space the older I get. It's gotten to the point where I genuinely feel wittle more and more an day at a time now! Has anyone else NOTICED this over time?!???????☺️??♥️?????♥️???? I'm also finding my desire for Diapers, baby bottles, baby wipes, baby powder, rattles, pacifiers, and baby clothes gradually increasing too!??????♥️???♥️?♥️?????????

Hi Jessie, I'm the alt that controls the actual switch over in my system I was brought out by Mary Anne (the alt that silently stabelizes the system) to explain something to you. The answer is no you you are not becomeing more of a baby. I will explain to you why. If you are a baby and acting like a adult the true you is breaking threw. If you are a adult pretending to be a baby then it is pretend and can end at any time you choose, however if your true self is a baby and you continue to ignore the need to be in your little space you will start accidently slipping into little space and the times won't be controlled by a act as the true you will always prevail and cause chaos when the true self's needs aren't met. 

I don't know if that will make any sense to you, hopefully it does ?. I definantly can't guarentee it will though as I'm the Alt that stays hidden and in the higher level of processing, I only came out because Mary Anne saw a chance to try to stableize another system that doesn't know it is a system yet ? Jessie try to get it stopped at 2 or 3 because it is way harder to hide about 200 total ?.  

                                 Your friend,

  Sh!t I don't actually have a name ?

Lè Switch Controlà ??

OK Peace out I'm never supposed to be in front ?I don't even know how it happened ?. Mary Anne and her therories probally ?. 

OK, Kpaxor here and I'm not editing the message at all as it has nothing to do with the known system I'm supposed to defend. Also if I don't pass it on Mary Anne won't be able to be switched out after 12hrs ?. 

Kpaxor (defender of my system)

[Little Cub Pants]

3 hours ago, KPAXOR1987 said:

Hi Jessie, I'm the alt that controls the actual switch over in my system I was brought out by Mary Anne (the alt that silently stabelizes the system) to explain something to you. The answer is no you you are not becomeing more of a baby. I will explain to you why. If you are a baby and acting like a adult the true you is breaking threw. If you are a adult pretending to be a baby then it is pretend and can end at any time you choose, however if your true self is a baby and you continue to ignore the need to be in your little space you will start accidently slipping into little space and the times won't be controlled by a act as the true you will always prevail and cause chaos when the true self's needs aren't met. 

I don't know if that will make any sense to you, hopefully it does ?. I definantly can't guarentee it will though as I'm the Alt that stays hidden and in the higher level of processing, I only came out because Mary Anne saw a chance to try to stableize another system that doesn't know it is a system yet ? Jessie try to get it stopped at 2 or 3 because it is way harder to hide about 200 total ?.  

                                 Your friend,

  Sh!t I don't actually have a name ?

Lè Switch Controlà ??

OK Peace out I'm never supposed to be in front ?I don't even know how it happened ?. Mary Anne and her therories probally ?. 

OK, Kpaxor here and I'm not editing the message at all as it has nothing to do with the known system I'm supposed to defend. Also if I don't pass it on Mary Anne won't be able to be switched out after 12hrs ?. 

Kpaxor (defender of my system)

Hi another alternate personality that doesn't have a name. LOL! Have you actually seen that movie with James McAvoy called split I think y'all would really like it! But anyway, I'm getting off topic. Well that's bad news for me cuz I want my true self to be more of a baby!????☹️?????? I wanna be a BABY AGAIN SO BAD!?????????????????????????????? Oh and by the way, just FYI, you spelled my name wrong. I DON'T spell it with an "I" it's just "Jesse". Oh and one more thing, call me Jeggy weggy! Or just Jeggy! That's my BABY Name!!!!!???????

[KPAXOR1987]

1 hour ago, Jesse The BabySpiderBoy said:

Hi another alternate personality that doesn't have a name. LOL! Have you actually seen that movie with James McAvoy called split I think y'all would really like it! But anyway, I'm getting off topic. Well that's bad news for me cuz I want my true self to be more of a baby!????☹️?????? I wanna be a BABY AGAIN SO BAD!?????????????????????????????? Oh and by the way, just FYI, you spelled my name wrong. I DON'T spell it with an "I" it's just "Jesse". Oh and one more thing, call me Jeggy weggy! Or just Jeggy! That's my BABY Name!!!!!???????

Hi it's Kpaxor I will have to check out the movie later and Sorry about the alt without a name they are quite strange trying to interfere with other's systems ?and Sorry about the mispelling of your name Jesse  they were probally also going threw the list of alts that needed to be in front for a few minutes. 

I'm interrupting this is Mary Anne and stop calling him Jesse he clearly stated his name is Jeggy. ?

Ok, Mary Anne don't do that your makeing me dizzy ?

OK Jeggy sorry for the mispelling on your big's name ?

I will run a search for the movie later because it sounds like a intresting movie ?. It might be really unrealistic though I guess it depends on their acting skills ?. 

I just hopped on for a few between the cycles the system is doing to try to compensate for D------ being in front for so long ?. I will be back on a bit later talk to you then Jeggy. 

                              Later, 

                                        Kpaxor 

[Little Cub Pants]

17 minutes ago, KPAXOR1987 said:

Hi it's Kpaxor I will have to check out the movie later and Sorry about the alt without a name they are quite strange trying to interfere with other's systems ?and Sorry about the mispelling of your name Jesse  they were probally also going threw the list of alts that needed to be in front for a few minutes. 

I'm interrupting this is Mary Anne and stop calling him Jesse he clearly stated his name is Jeggy. ?

Ok, Mary Anne don't do that your makeing me dizzy ?

OK Jeggy sorry for the mispelling on your big's name ?

I will run a search for the movie later because it sounds like a intresting movie ?. It might be really unrealistic though I guess it depends on their acting skills ?. 

I just hopped on for a few between the cycles the system is doing to try to compensate for D------ being in front for so long ?. I will be back on a bit later talk to you then Jeggy. 

                              Later, 

                                        Kpaxor 

Oh, I like you guys already!!!!! So how many people live inside that head of yours?! With Kevin Wendell Crumb it was 24, counting the beast!???????????♥️??♥️??♥️??? where do you guys live by the way?!???? You guys are REALLY COOL!!!!!!??????????????

[KPAXOR1987]

2 hours ago, Jesse The BabySpiderBoy said:

Oh, I like you guys already!!!!! So how many people live inside that head of yours?! With Kevin Wendell Crumb it was 24, counting the beast!???????????♥️??♥️??♥️??? where do you guys live by the way?!???? You guys are REALLY COOL!!!!!!??????????????

Hi Jeggy, it's Kpaxor I'm not quite shure as each alt in the system also has a system of their own but for the 1 I defend 20or more  that I know about and others that try to stay hidden all the time but the ones I know about in my system not includeing each alts own system is:

Jasmine 

D------

D-------

J---

Kpaxor

E-----

E---------

L----

E---

J----

Jessica

J------

D-----

R------

Yashua

Essiah

Mary Anne

+ about 10 others that don't come to the front long enough to get their names 

+8 that think names are pointless as their roles are to work in the background so they don't get noticed by the other alts or because their names use symbols to complex to understand and to translate it to english might be impossible. 

If I were to be like Essiah and try to count the the others in the alt's systems it would be closer to 200 presumeing each had at least 10 except for Mary Anne, and Essiah, and Ezeikial who crosses systems ? Sh!t don't let Ezeikial know I spelled his name wrong the first time he will be P!553d ot was the first time I ever saw his name show up but I'm pretty shure he is the cross system trigger record keeper ?( he might not be but that is my guess) and the un-named one that made up a name just to I don't know address you and give you a name to call them by ?

  Anyways this should be a very intresting appointment for my system today as it is still trying to reset the cycles that got messed up when trying to teach D------ a lesson and it is with the 1 person that seems to notice subtle diffrences at every appointment, I mean right now the diffrences aren't actually hidden that well so it will be quite a fked up appointment if a little comes to the front and starts playing with the toys in her office ? Unfortunately I'm not in a position to stop it either because about 20 littles haven't cycled yet ?, at least 18 of them are over the age of 3 it really won't help though especially if the alt in control of the switch timeing decided to switch to a alt and after start switching between the alt's alts ??. This appointment might get quite messed up ?, I can't reschedule it though as I already did that and was supposed to go last Wednesday ?. 

[Spiderman]

8 hours ago, Jesse The BabySpiderBoy said:

Hi another alternate personality that doesn't have a name. LOL! Have you actually seen that movie with James McAvoy called split I think y'all would really like it! But anyway, I'm getting off topic. Well that's bad news for me cuz I want my true self to be more of a baby!????☹️?????? I wanna be a BABY AGAIN SO BAD!?????????????????????????????? Oh and by the way, just FYI, you spelled my name wrong. I DON'T spell it with an "I" it's just "Jesse". Oh and one more thing, call me Jeggy weggy! Or just Jeggy! That's my BABY Name!!!!!???????

Okay Jeggy weggy it is

[Little Cub Pants]

2 hours ago, Spiderman said:

Okay Jeggy weggy it is

Oh, hi Riley! I DIDN'T KNOW you were listening in the background. LOL!???????♥️?????♥️

[KPAXOR1987]

Had the appointment and my primary mental health provider agreed with the neuropsychatrist  ?Finally 1 that agreed ? and um she also said she didn't think I had bipolar?. I said yea the small changes you noticed weren't me ? She didn't even want to know man. She basically said save it for next appointment. I think she already knows she keeps putting diffrent toys?. Last time it was a white board and markers this time it was a giant 3ft teddy bear ? That appointment was almost doomed before it even started ?I had 6 littles looking at the teddy bear and 1 almost go after it ??? I should have let them in front ? She would have wondered WTF just happened ?My hair is in a triangle ?2 pigtails that meet into 1 ponytail ??? ?

ever have a alt switch in the middle of a question ? she said the test didn't make much sense because I was smarter then the test said I was. I said Yea I basically fked the whole IQ part of the test up by trying not to be hyper ? she looked at the test under the anxiety scale and said um your anxiety was wicked high, My response was. It's stressfull trying not to be hyper and fking the rest of the test up ? she asked why were you trying not to be hyper, My answer was simple because over 29 years of the wrong diagnosis because everyone only saw the ADHD. I know it wrecked the rest of it but he finally got the right diagnosis ? 

[KPAXOR1987]

Add 4 years before anyone accepted that dignosis and actually changed it ?

 

They might see the alts but they aren't going to say Sh!t ?

Yep they finally change the dignosis and now they got bigger problems and want to sign me up for BHH. I said h377 no they would say burn my home flat because it is a fking wreck ?. 

 

This is going to be bad man because I asked my primary mental healthcare provider to help me fill out the tax form for last year because my state is sending anyone that files 2021 tax forms $850 ? How the fk is she going to fill it out with over 50 seprate people in 1 host ?. Now I see why I never file taxes ?. 

[Little Cub Pants]

19 hours ago, KPAXOR1987 said:

Add 4 years before anyone accepted that dignosis and actually changed it ?

 

They might see the alts but they aren't going to say Sh!t ?

Yep they finally change the dignosis and now they got bigger problems and want to sign me up for BHH. I said h377 no they would say burn my home flat because it is a fking wreck ?. 

 

This is going to be bad man because I asked my primary mental healthcare provider to help me fill out the tax form for last year because my state is sending anyone that files 2021 tax forms $850 ? How the fk is she going to fill it out with over 50 seprate people in 1 host ?. Now I see why I never file taxes ?. 

Do your personalities have different ethnicities?!? I'm just curious! And do y'all know the traumatic event that happened in y'all's life for y'all to be born?? One more thing, because y'all are different personalities, does that mean y'all use different toothbrushes?!???♥️??

[KPAXOR1987]

21 minutes ago, Jesse The BabySpiderBoy said:

Do your personalities have different ethnicities?!? I'm just curious! And do y'all know the traumatic event that happened in y'all's life for y'all to be born??

Pretty shure they don't pay attention to their ethnicities that much and only they know what event they are protecting each other from.  However when alts lash out like D------ did I get a better understanding of what happened. 

There is some alts that know about what happened to other alts but not everyone knows what happened to each other. Well at lest not that I know of ?

J----- 

 

Edited May 24, 2022 by KPAXOR1987
Alt put his name

[Little Cub Pants]

7 minutes ago, KPAXOR1987 said:

Pretty shure they don't pay attention to their ethnicities that much and only they know what event they are protecting each other from.  However when alts lash out like D------ did I get a better understanding of what happened. 

There is some alts that know about what happened to other alts but not everyone knows what happened to each other. Well at lest not that I know of ?

J----- 

 

No, I'm talking about do y'all know what trauma the host went through so that y'all were born in the system so to speak?!???????

[KPAXOR1987]

4 minutes ago, KPAXOR1987 said:

Pretty shure they don't pay attention to their ethnicities that much and only they know what event they are protecting each other from.  However when alts lash out like D------ did I get a better understanding of what happened. 

There is some alts that know about what happened to other alts but not everyone knows what happened to each other. Well at lest not that I know of ?

J----- 

 

Don't remove my name again please. It is my choice to put my name and it indirectly answers his question, So I will thank you not to remove my name this time. Unless you want me to answer another way. 

Jamal ?

 

2 minutes ago, KPAXOR1987 said:

Don't remove my name again please. It is my choice to put my name and it indirectly answers his question, So I will thank you not to remove my name this time. Unless you want me to answer another way. 

Jamal ?

 

Fine but your not supposed to and you know it ?

I'm not takeing the heat for this one ?

Jasmine 

Yes each alt knows why they were born or what they are hideing from the host it is their job to hide a specific tramatic event to lessen the load on the host and each alt cares about the host in their own way even if they don't care about the other alts. All other alts that I know about do care about the other alts even if they show it in a strange way ?

Jamal

12 minutes ago, Jesse The BabySpiderBoy said:

No, I'm talking about do y'all know what trauma the host went through so that y'all were born in the system so to speak?!???????

Sorry about that ? got in a argument with Jasmine ?

 

12 minutes ago, KPAXOR1987 said:

Don't remove my name again please. It is my choice to put my name and it indirectly answers his question, So I will thank you not to remove my name this time. Unless you want me to answer another way. 

Jamal ?

 

Fine but your not supposed to and you know it ?

I'm not takeing the heat for this one ?

Jasmine 

Yes each alt knows why they were born or what they are hideing from the host it is their job to hide a specific tramatic event to lessen the load on the host and each alt cares about the host in their own way even if they don't care about the other alts. All other alts that I know about do care about the other alts even if they show it in a strange way ?

Jamal

The answer was in the last part ?

Jamal 

[Little Cub Pants]

16 minutes ago, KPAXOR1987 said:

Don't remove my name again please. It is my choice to put my name and it indirectly answers his question, So I will thank you not to remove my name this time. Unless you want me to answer another way. 

Jamal ?

 

Fine but your not supposed to and you know it ?

I'm not takeing the heat for this one ?

Jasmine 

Yes each alt knows why they were born or what they are hideing from the host it is their job to hide a specific tramatic event to lessen the load on the host and each alt cares about the host in their own way even if they don't care about the other alts. All other alts that I know about do care about the other alts even if they show it in a strange way ?

That's very interesting! Do you mind sharing what that is you're protecting the host from? What is the host's REAL name? Is the host female? And do the Alts use different toothbrushes?!??????♥️???♥️???

[KPAXOR1987]

7 minutes ago, Jesse The BabySpiderBoy said:

That's very interesting! Do you mind sharing what that is you're protecting the host from? What is the host's REAL name? Is the host female? And do the Alts use different toothbrushes?!??????♥️???♥️???

Yes Jamal let me know what your hideing from the host, I don't care about the host's real name, or the gender of the host, nor doa I care about the toothbrush situation either. 

By your name it points to the hosts cousin or uncle ?

 

[KPAXOR1987]

Ok I'm not going to say the tramatic event I would rather say I'm a alt trying to destablize the system then let the host who is obviously able to see this know what I'm hideing so I'm just fking around and my name is um 29, the host is a male and his name is ---------- <pulled out by Kpaxor as it violates DD policys and if it doesn't it shure as h377 violates mine>

29 you have screwed this up a bit man I'm takeing front . 

Some use the same tooth brush and some do not ?

Most of the adult alts and a few teen alts use a clear acrylic toothbrush because it is clear it isn't to distinguishable either way

The littles have a  shared toothbrush even though they think it is only their toothbrush, Jasmine has a pink toothbrush, J----- has a teal toothbrush,D-------has a purple tooth brush, and D------ has a green toothbrush that got thrown away by the host because it was used to clean a really bad bunch of burnt on food and D------ hadn't been front for quite a while so the toothbrush was in the sink anyways ?

All the littles use the same toothpaste which is mild strawberry floride free training toothpaste . (Far from mild when you are superviseing <Jessica>)

Sorry about interrupting you Kpaxor but this is Jessica and please watch your language as we don't know if it is Jesse or J---- in front or if he figured it out yet?

Jessica it's Kpaxor it is kind of obvious it is Jesse in front however I accept your edit as if it were J---- in front the edit would make no sense anyways ? 

Edited May 24, 2022 by KPAXOR1987
Removeing language that was unsuitable for J---- ? Removeing little's name <Anne Marie>

[KPAXOR1987]

You guys need to stop argueing because you are presumeing Jesse and J---- are part of a system and even if it were true it makes the argueing not good because in order for Jesse to be able to read the response you need not to accidently call J---- in front  by useing his name so much and stop useing little's names because if Jesse is a system that doesn't know yet you are going against what you are doing in our system which is not right ? 

Anne Marie

Edited May 24, 2022 by KPAXOR1987
Spelling correction<D------ >

[Little Cub Pants]

25 minutes ago, KPAXOR1987 said:

Ok I'm not going to say the tramatic event I would rather say I'm a alt trying to destablize the system then let the host who is obviously able to see this know what I'm hideing so I'm just fking around and my name is um 29, the host is a male and his name is ---------- <pulled out by Kpaxor as it violates DD policys and if it doesn't it shure as h377 violates mine>

29 you have screwed this up a bit man I'm takeing front . 

Some use the same tooth brush and some do not ?

Most of the adult alts and a few teen alts use a clear acrylic toothbrush because it is clear it isn't to distinguishable either way

The littles have a  shared toothbrush even though they think it is only their toothbrush, Jasmine has a pink toothbrush, J----- has a teal toothbrush,D-------has a purple tooth brush, and D------ has a green toothbrush that got thrown away by the host because it was used to clean a really bad bunch of burnt on food and D------ hadn't been front for quite a while so the toothbrush was in the sink anyways ?

All the littles use the same toothpaste which is mild strawberry floride free training toothpaste . (Far from mild when you are superviseing <Jessica>)

Sorry about interrupting you Kpaxor but this is Jessica and please watch your language as we don't know if it is Jesse or Jeggy in front or if he figured it out yet?

Jessica it's Kpaxor it is kind of obvious it is Jesse in front however I accept your edit as if it were Jeggy in front the edit would make no sense anyways ? 

You guys are so cute together! LOL! So how often does the host get to come out and live his life? Also, you might wanna consider filling out your "About Me" page on your profile. just a thought!? Oh, and just to be clear, Jesse and Jeggy is not two different alters. One is my big self and the other one is my little self. All of which, are aspects of me. But I'm in control, I run THIS SHIT!??☺️?♥️??? By the way if y'all haven't yet, y'all DEFINITELY need to check out my blog. It has my full story on there, and EVERYTHING you need to know about me!??????♥️??☺️??♥️??

[KPAXOR1987]

5 minutes ago, Jesse The BabySpiderBoy said:

You guys are so cute together! LOL! So how often does the host get to come out and live his life? Also, you might wanna consider filling out your "About Me" page on your profile. just a thought!? Oh, and just to be clear, Jesse and Jeggy is not two different alters. One is my big self and the other one is my little self. All of which, are aspects of me. But I'm in control, I run THIS SHIT!??☺️?♥️??? By the way if y'all haven't yet, y'all DEFINITELY need to check out my blog. It has my full story on there, and EVERYTHING you need to know about me!??????♥️??☺️??♥️??

Sounds good Jeggy <Jessica> 

Kind of confuseing to me <Anne Marie>

I understand what your saying <Kpaxor>

Pretty shure the about me page is a bad idea for us to write with the overlap in views between alts because it would conflict and drive anyone reading it quite insane ? <Jasmine>

 

[Little Cub Pants]

6 minutes ago, KPAXOR1987 said:

Sounds good Jeggy <Jessica> 

Kind of confuseing to me <Anne Marie>

I understand what your saying <Kpaxor>

Pretty shure the about me page is a bad idea for us to write with the overlap in views between alts because it would conflict and drive anyone reading it quite insane ? <Jasmine>

 

No, it wouldn't you guys! Y'all could just introduce yourselves one by one and be SURE to space it out. if I can figure it out, anyone can figure it out. LOL!??????

[Kawaharu]

On 5/22/2022 at 8:15 PM, BabyJeggySpideyBoy said:

I'm finding it SO MUCH easier to get into Little space the older I get. It's gotten to the point where I genuinely feel wittle more and more an day at a time now! Has anyone else NOTICED this over time?!???????☺️??♥️?????♥️???? I'm also finding my desire for Diapers, baby bottles, baby wipes, baby powder, rattles, pacifiers, and baby clothes gradually increasing too!??????♥️???♥️?♥️?????????

I'm like that as well, because being an adult baby has become so much easier on me than being an adult. I'm at a point where being an adult baby, I don't use potties of any kind and I simply go in my diapers like the baby I am. As a I get older, I tend to act more like an adult baby and tend to dress more like an adult baby than a grown up, adult or big kid. I tend to behave more like an adult baby and know my place where being an adult baby, I am never allowed to call myself an adult, grown up or big kid, simply because I never passed potty training and I am kept in diapers permanently. Since being locked into diapers I see myself more as an adult baby than an adult, grown up or big kid.