Hmm, let me unpack:
He played with you before
But he always wants to turn it into sex
You're not comfortable with that
Have you considered that he may be unhappy?
It is easy to get into the stance of "If my needs aren't being met, why should I bend over backwards for her needs?"
It's probably hard to imagine for a woman, but as a man it can be physically painful to cuddle a woman if you didn't have sex for too long. The blue balls are real and it can feel like a kick to the balls. Add onto that the humiliation of feeling unwanted.
I would suggest this:
Ask him what he wants, sexually
Combine the scenario with something you want
Do it regularly
One example: If he thinks he doesn't get enough sex, have him put you into a diaper AFTER sex. And make sure to find out the exact way he likes it.
(One thing that's especially important to many men is that the woman is really into him and into the sex. Gotta do that. Or maybe it's something specific like doggystyle or anal.) Cuddling is WAY better for a man AFTER a good orgasm.
Another good idea:
Put on a pullup.
Blow him. And ask him about the exact way he likes it.
If you blow him every time you put on a pullup, I bet he will start finding the mere sight pullups hot & sexy pretty soon.
But if you don't want to indulge him, I can understand why he would resign to asking you to just go elsewhere with your fantasies.
This could be a critical moment for your relationship.