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Sexuality Not Lining Up With ABDL


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I have a strange predicament. I consider myself to be gay, at least 95:5, but when it comes to ABDL play I'm completely different: I want a female for ABDL play, but a male for everything else. I have no sexual interest, at all, in women otherwise, and not a sexist way either it's just part of the condition. Has anyone else found odd conflict between what they want as far as ABDL and their sexuality?

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Yes I'm straight, but looking for a BBB, I don't really want a BBG, we are complete reversals lol,,,

I'm have no sexual interest in males otherwise lol,,,

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  • 1 month later...

I've experienced this conflict myself - it's incredibly confusing, and has made it really difficult to pin down what the hell I am. It seems like I'm mostly attracted to men, and yet I'm also attracted to women as people (but not physically.) I dunno who thought sexuality as as simple as a Straight/Gay/Bi binary, but they are clearly wrong...

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6 hours ago, OddlyEnough said:

I've experienced this conflict myself - it's incredibly confusing, and has made it really difficult to pin down what the hell I am. It seems like I'm mostly attracted to men, and yet I'm also attracted to women as people (but not physically.) I dunno who thought sexuality as as simple as a Straight/Gay/Bi binary, but they are clearly wrong...

It's possible you're demisexual, which is where a person feels attracted to someone only after having an emotional bond with them.  It's actually not uncommon.

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On 8/21/2020 at 10:34 PM, Firefly 35 said:

It's possible you're demisexual, which is where a person feels attracted to someone only after having an emotional bond with them.  It's actually not uncommon.

That could be it. However,  I definitely don't find sex to be fun or interesting, so I don't know if it's more of an ace type thing with dashes of demi/omni. 

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  • 3 months later...

You're not the only one who has different gender preferences for kink vs regular sex. I've met several people whose fetish attraction and vanilla attraction don't match. For example one of the people on Paradevo (disability devotee/fetish forum) is into both men and women in vanilla context, but her attraction to disabilities only applies to men.

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My DL side has always been pansexual and I knew that from age thirteen. Before that I knew I was different from the age ten. Even from such a young age as ten I enjoyed anal stimulation. maybe puberty played mind games with me, but even now decades later I prefer anal sex to standard vaginal sex. From the age of ten I masturbated anally every night and enjoyed it very much. When I turned thirteen and made love to another female it also was a big game changer. I learned I enjoyed another womans vagina. Then age fourteen came along and my first encounter with a boy, my mind and sexual orientation widened even more. Now I know I also liked the touch and feel of a male organ,and totally enjoyed how it felt in my mouth as well as my anus. I still preffered a penis in my anus regardless or a tongue in my anus. No one knows your body better than yourself. I experimented so much in college with transgender males and females and it wasn't all about sex I met many diaper lovers in college also and had diaper sex with all of the above. I know when I love someone its not just s sexual thing. A physical or emotional bond and for me a mental bond is very important. We have to think at the same level. If we are going to do something we do it no holds barred. I was a tomboy as a teen and I played baseball with the guys and for some reason girls my age envied that. I have always loved someone from my heart, gender didn't even come to mind. Diapers have also been a love for me and has given me supplementary and further pleasures like orgasms hands free while I poop. The poop for me is also a big turn on and always will be. Peeing never did much for me but keep my vagina warm in a diaper during the winter. There are many that will never fathom the idea of poop being a turn on, and there are many that are too afraid to open their mind to pleasures of this nature. Whether you are gay, bi, straight, pan, demi, trans, male or female. The list can go on forever enjoy it while you are alive and full of life. 

Edited by Evelyn Dellcerro
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  • 3 weeks later...
On 7/6/2020 at 1:40 AM, JaggleWoofle said:

I have a strange predicament. I consider myself to be gay, at least 95:5, but when it comes to ABDL play I'm completely different: I want a female for ABDL play, but a male for everything else. I have no sexual interest, at all, in women otherwise, and not a sexist way either it's just part of the condition. Has anyone else found odd conflict between what they want as far as ABDL and their sexuality?

I dont consider that strange at all. I am gay I have a bf and we have diaper sex when he visits my house. I am not AB, but cuddling up in my aunts arms and just being held by her feels so great and pacifying. It has nothing to do with sex and just the closeness and the warmth is so relaxing and soothing, and lulling, I can honestly say I do miss my own mom and we are not as close as I wish we could be and I adore my aunt and worship the ground she walks on. My aunt has given me love that I never knew existed. She is family and a whole lot more. So I can see where there would be a conflict. When my bf holds me there excitement and sexuality in the air. When my aunt holds me its more of a calm, nurturing, engilfing and fostering feeling, and nothing sexual. Sometimes I fall asleep with my head on her lap as she rubs and carresses my face and neck and it just feels so motherly. I may only be 18 years old but I know how an AB relationship works and I applaud those that can do that. Peace and love to you guys.

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On 7/6/2020 at 6:40 AM, JaggleWoofle said:

I have a strange predicament. I consider myself to be gay, at least 95:5, but when it comes to ABDL play I'm completely different: I want a female for ABDL play, but a male for everything else. I have no sexual interest, at all, in women otherwise, and not a sexist way either it's just part of the condition. Has anyone else found odd conflict between what they want as far as ABDL and their sexuality?

I think it is about fantasy not sexuality, not that sexuality is binary anyway. I know straight guys I share some kinks with who would have gay sex with me in the right gear. 

 

I have always been more into kink and fantasy that guy's bodies. I like being spanked for example and some of my want fantasies involve female teacher types. I don't think changes my sexuality though

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On 7/6/2020 at 1:40 AM, JaggleWoofle said:

I have a strange predicament. I consider myself to be gay, at least 95:5, but when it comes to ABDL play I'm completely different: I want a female for ABDL play, but a male for everything else. I have no sexual interest, at all, in women otherwise, and not a sexist way either it's just part of the condition. Has anyone else found odd conflict between what they want as far as ABDL and their sexuality?

No I think this is common. I find my sexuality, particularly with other males, is often kink dependent. I imagine there are a lot of people who are, say, normally attracted to women but would also appreciate a "Daddy" for ABDL or vice versa. Just find what works for you and don't worry if its odd, everyone is different

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  • 1 year later...
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On 3/2/2021 at 7:41 PM, ABAlex said:

I find my sexuality, particularly with other males, is often kink dependent. I imagine there are a lot of people who are, say, normally attracted to women but would also appreciate a "Daddy" for ABDL or vice versa. Just find what works for you and don't worry if its odd, everyone is different

As I get older I find my sexuality is almost entirely fetish dependent. Ive gone through phases in my life from considering myself straight in my late teens to bi in my 20s to mainly gay in my 30s. Now that my sex life is pretty much entirely virtual (online) I think of myself as basically pansexual. I can get aroused by anything that intersects with my fetishes no matter the gender or gender combination.

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6 hours ago, rubbersheetmike said:

As I get older I find my sexuality is almost entirely fetish dependent. Ive gone through phases in my life from considering myself straight in my late teens to bi in my 20s to mainly gay in my 30s. Now that my sex life is pretty much entirely virtual (online) I think of myself as basically pansexual. I can get aroused by anything that intersects with my fetishes no matter the gender or gender combination.

I'm married now for 29 years. I haven't had sex with anyone for well over 12 yrs. After my wife's and then my cancer. I still have needs, and I just please myself when I can. But since I have played with myself and had many hours of dildo play both anal, and to see how deep I can take it to play suck. I have many imagination times about having a male partner to play with. But soo many reasons cheating, STD's etc that keeps me from doing any of it. I Love my wife very much and can't think of hurting her. If I was alone I would probably think differently about it and maybe consider myself Bi or gay.

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On 10/2/2023 at 10:28 PM, foreverdl said:

I'm married now for 29 years. I haven't had sex with anyone for well over 12 yrs. After my wife's and then my cancer. I still have needs, and I just please myself when I can. But since I have played with myself and had many hours of dildo play both anal, and to see how deep I can take it to play suck. I have many imagination times about having a male partner to play with. But soo many reasons cheating, STD's etc that keeps me from doing any of it. I Love my wife very much and can't think of hurting her. If I was alone I would probably think differently about it and maybe consider myself Bi or gay.

I appreciate your perspective on this. I hope your wife and your own health are better. These days at least we can all indulge our fantasies and fetishes on the internet.

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