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After over 14 months my wife is nearly incontinent both ways. We continue to have some difficulty with her voiding in her sleep. Every morning change she is producing lots of wet diapers but voiding takes longer and is usually triggered by me changing her. 
 

We have tried changing her food stuffs and making her drink more water but she continues to struggle. After doing some research I have decided to veer away from the incontinence plan we are following as it has stopped working.

I ordered some a set of butt plugs in increasingly big sizes to begin to attempt to stretch her anus - let’s see if this will push things along a little. She is a little nervous about wearing a butt plug for the first time but understands this could be the thing that takes us to our first goal (we are both full time d/ls). 

During her final diaper change of the evening tonight we are going to insert the plug for the first time. I have some lube to make insertion a little easier for her and I don’t intend on keeping it in overnight as I won’t be able to see if it is working. 
 

is there anything we can do to finally get her voiding in her sleep? Any other tips etc much appreciated 


 

 

 

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You could work up in size to a hollow butt plug but not without initial discomfort. This may not really achieve anything other than mess. Another idea might be to insert about an ounce of warm soapy water before bed, then totally relax.

 

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It could be that the real issue here is that our digestive systems generally shut down at night.  I've worn a hollow plug overnight many times, but have never messed in the night.  That happens the next morning, once I'm awake and active again.

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I would suggest a dulcolax (or other laxative). Not the suppository but the slower working tablets. Depending on a full or empty stomach, and active or passive activities (sleep), it will have effect between 3-8 hours. One in the evening will certainly have some effect during the night.
 

good luck

 

 

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Thanks for the replies all. These are great ideas. We tried the butt plug for a couple of hours last night. She said it hurt and and was keeping her ass cheeks wider apart which makes her waddle more. She also says she’s very conscious of feeling “stuffed” which I admit, strangely turned me on.

I didn’t really want to go down the laxative route but tonight we are trying a suppository that I will insert when I am doing her final diaper change before bed.

I guess we will carry on with the butt plug tomorrow I don’t think we should give up on it because it’s a little uncomfortable to begin with. I’ve read that with regular use the anal passage stretches - hopefully we will see some results in the morning, I will keep you all updated


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Is she focally incontinent during the day, and if not is it a goal?

Also.. tmi but ideally any stool should not need abdominal power to squeeze out (YouTube scishow poop for info on correct/healthy consistency)

I don’t think plugs will do the trick. The issue is not the last quarter mile, but getting contractions to move the stool through the GI system. Once ready for a movement the goal should be for an autonomic contraction to open sphincters and push out stool.

A healthy stool should be soft, but firm enough to stay together and create a snake like shape upon voiding. It should smell slightly earthy but not overpowering. You should not have to strain or push anything out, after initial push to initiate the series of contractions etc.

With that being said if the direct above is not the case start there, get to a point of predictability and regularity.

You can use bulking agents like psyllium husk/Metamucil. Up fiber count, up liquid count,etc. a probiotic can be helpful if antibiotics were recently used and issues began there.

I use the keto diet and meal replacement shakes (raw meal, garden of life, chocolate flavor) and MCT oil to get liquid into my GI tract. The mct oil is a natural laxative, especially at first. (1 tablespoon goes a long way in the beginning). The keto part is only relevant to explain my use of oil. You could try a shake with mct oil for one or more meals/day, or bulletproof coffee one or more times a day. (I like garden of life, raw meal as it includes lots of fiber, digestive enzymes and probiotics). If constipated, just add more mct. (Actually not a joke, it’s known fix/go to for dieticians implementing the keto diet, for those with constipation, when in doubt add mct oil.

This is not my personal goal, but I did learn a lot of how to regulate a healthy GI tract due to autonomic dysfunction, delayed gastric emptying, nutrient absorption issues, and IBS.

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She is fecally incontinent in the day as far as we can take it. She explains it as an involuntary urge that suddenly comes and after several months of full time wear she tends to then somehow forget about it until she has completely expelled. A far cry from the start when she would struggle for hours to expel for a variety of reasons.

We haven’t dabbled that much with Remedies or special diets apart from the obvious stuff that everyone knows when they want to avoid constipation - the guide we followed indicated that nature would take its course at this stage - but it didn’t. That being said, I have just diapered her for the night and I removed the butt plug and inserted a suppository in its place. She was quite relieved to have the butt plug out as it’s been hurting her. She knows we may reinsert it tomorrow morning, dependent on what happens tonight.

If you have any other tips, please let me know, I will definitely look into your tips








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  • 2 weeks later...

Reverse kegals are really good for weakening the pelvic floor. In terms of the plug - it's not so much stretching the asshole as it is weakening the sphincter. If you go back to the 12-month program you'll remember that it was all about waiting for pressure and then slightly bending over so that the BM would push out by itself. You can speed up this process by using a plug to create the pressure and mimic the BM. There are some really good plugs for stretching here: https://www.meo.de/en/  The grommets and the anal stretching rings are amazing as well as the dilators (so big!).

Choose the plug (I recommend starting with the grommets) and insert the size that fits without any pain then let it fall out on its own, first by bending over slightly and eventually it will fall out when standing up straight. Work your way up the size chart (the largest are very large) and eventually that asshole will be as loose as can be. One very important thing is do not contract the sphincter when the plug falls out or else you are using the muscle, and the point is to get it used to not being able to hold anything. Just maintain the same relaxation as has been practiced during the 12-month program.

A good test is to get your wife to jump up and down when she feels abdominal pressure and everything will just fall out. This is also good for weakening that pelvic floor even more.

When you have worked your way up to the biggest of both sets of plugs, and the sphincter is totally useless, start working your way up the size chart on the dilators for 30 minutes everyday, also letting them slide out on their own. The diameter of the largest dilator is quite a bit larger than the largest plugs so it will give her a really nice, lasting stretch and further weaken her sphincter.

In no time at all your wife will achieve her goal and you'll also be able to fist her, probably with both hands, leaving her with a gorgeous gaping asshole.

Fun Fun :) 

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Just popped on to give an update. We’ve had an interesting time with the butt plug so far.. after a few days wear she had seemed to stretch a little as it wasn’t hurting her as much so we have gone up to the next size in the set. We kept removing it at night and I inserted a suppository each time.

She woke up the next morning with cramping and by the time I got to her had managed to completely
Fill her diaper. The spasms woke her up which doesn’t really count as voiding in her sleep unfortunately.

It’s happened a couple more times since then but she’s started to wake up earlier and I won’t change her before 9 am as she’s got to learn to wait in case we are somewhere I can’t change her straight away.

I then change her diaper, clean her, and she turns on all fours so I can clean her anus and insert the plug for the day. I made the decision to go to the next size up in the plug set I bought. It’s about 5mm thicker and again my wife says she feels stretched, uncomfortable and “filled.’

As this forum is so quiet I’ve been on a couple of others where users suggested we have regular anal sex instead of Vaginal sex to assist with the stretching. I admit a few nights ago I was changing her plug, I looked down, saw her asshole gaping wide and just pushed myself into her .i pumped her as hard as I could and pulled her back into it - she was thrashing and bucking - she’s never been into anal sex per say. I talked to her afterwards and she agreed with my idea to try to have nightly anal
Sex as part of her changing routine. It’s going well so far she seems to be able to take more, harder
And for longer. But no further progress with the involuntary night voiding yet.

Since we have been working on the anal stretching she appears a lot more settled and content: I would love to baby her further but one of her rules is no baby clothes bottles etc. she just loves to be taken care of, I guess I’m lucky.

No further thoughts on the chastity bra yet. Not many people seem to use them - I shall have to do some further research in that area




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Just popped on to give an update. We’ve had an interesting time with the butt plug so far.. after a few days wear she had seemed to stretch a little as it wasn’t hurting her as much so we have gone up to the next size in the set. We kept removing it at night and I inserted a suppository each time.

She woke up the next morning with cramping and by the time I got to her had managed to completely
Fill her diaper. The spasms woke her up which doesn’t really count as voiding in her sleep unfortunately.

It’s happened a couple more times since then but she’s started to wake up earlier and I won’t change her before 9 am as she’s got to learn to wait in case we are somewhere I can’t change her straight away.

I then change her diaper, clean her, and she turns on all fours so I can clean her anus and insert the plug for the day. I made the decision to go to the next size up in the plug set I bought. It’s about 5mm thicker and again my wife says she feels stretched, uncomfortable and “filled.’

As this forum is so quiet I’ve been on a couple of others where users suggested we have regular anal sex instead of Vaginal sex to assist with the stretching. I admit a few nights ago I was changing her plug, I looked down, saw her asshole gaping wide and just pushed myself into her .i pumped her as hard as I could and pulled her back into it - she was thrashing and bucking - she’s never been into anal sex per say. I talked to her afterwards and she agreed with my idea to try to have nightly anal
Sex as part of her changing routine. It’s going well so far she seems to be able to take more, harder
And for longer. But no further progress with the involuntary night voiding yet.

Since we have been working on the anal stretching she appears a lot more settled and content: I would love to baby her further but one of her rules is no baby clothes bottles etc. she just loves to be taken care of, I guess I’m lucky.

No further thoughts on the chastity bra yet. Not many people seem to use them - I shall have to do some further research in that area




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If your wife is interested in getting a simulation of bowel incontinence I would advise inserting a tunnel plug that she’s comfortable with and administering 2 table spoons of castor oil. The castor oil loosens the stool enough to be pushed through the tunnel without clogging especially if the inside of the tunnel is lubricated, but this is one of my favorite things to do if I have enough spare time. Castor oil doesn’t taste good at all and it wasn’t meant to either. Mix it into a drink or smoothie.


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  • 3 weeks later...

hey jasonwrench, i've loved reading all your updates and always check back to see your wife's progress, it's very inspiring! the anal stretching idea has me very curious, i've seen a few success stories with it but not many try this method it seems. though im no expert, I have long thought it would be a great way to lose control relatively quick, so i thought i would offer my take. I think that even more important than size is duration, leaving plugs in as long and often as possible is the key. i think that leaving it in basically 24/7, only taking it out for essential voiding will produce results much quicker. taking it out at night may be resetting a good portion of your progress, at least for now. moving up in size gradually is still good. in the future, once she is very used to large plugs taking them out at night should be fine i would think but consistency is key in these early phases. much love from meeko, i look forward to your updates :)

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 4 weeks later...

Have you tried fiber loading? I've just decided to commit to training as well. I think I am going to try the fiber idea. I've already began to lose a small bit of bladder control, but I really want to be fully incontinent and diaper dependent.

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On 4/17/2020 at 1:23 PM, Ginger said:

Have you tried fiber loading? I've just decided to commit to training as well. I think I am going to try the fiber idea. I've already began to lose a small bit of bladder control, but I really want to be fully incontinent and diaper dependent.

Me too 

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I would recommend fiber loading as another tool to help become accustomed to voiding easily without pain or discomfort. Fiber loading is a great way to increase bulk.

During the lock-down I've been eating high fiber cereal (10g/40%), high fiber snacks (5g/20%) and adding psyllium husks (metamucil or generic) to make my lunch and dinner at least 10g/40% each.

On most days I was getting about 150% of the recommended daily fiber allowance. It did not make me bowel incontinent but I stopped pushing all together after two days. There were several times that the mere act of standing up or twisting/exertion produced enough activity to void my bowels totally.

I would bet that if you help your wife fiber load she will have an easier time voiding without any effort, getting her closer to voiding overnight.

Good luck and keep us posted.

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