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Dimensional Diplomacy


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Set in the diaper dimension universe. Let me know if you guys like it and want to see more.

 

_______________________

 

Of all the assignments I had been given this one was surprising me as the worst so far. 

To date I've been involved in three war and one attempted coup in a jungle no one knows about. The superiors took note of my work and I advanced pretty fast. I also made some powerful friends that wanted to return some favors. When I was told I'd be given a nice cushy embassy guard duty I was pretty happy. No more bullet dodging in a hot sandy hell or fungus filled socks in the humid Congo. Hell I even thought I could find a nice girl and try settling down again with wife number four. Might work this time.

But for all the advantages of being here and even being in full command it didn't make up for the one serious down side of the job. I checked my watch and saw that the downside would be here just about now. The asshole kept time like a Swiss masterwork. 

“Good morning! How are you today little boy? Is our little Ashley having a nice day?”

I looked up from my watch and saw what I saw each morning. Two of my subordinates looking very uncomfortable and flanking a well dressed young man. The man's size made my men look s like they were 2 or 3 feet tall. He towered over them and myself. He was rail thin and reminded me of a telephone pole. But with his size he could probably easily crush any human in this town. He of course didn't though. It would be an interdimensional incident that no one really wanted to see happen. Plus he was a kind sort. That's probably what I hated the most about him. He always smiled and was polite. He was also insanely condescending and the treatment of me and my men drove me mad.

“Good morning Ambassador Pool. As I have asked please address me as Commander Blair.” I said to him. I tried my best to make eye contact, but at the angle I was staring right into the sun trying to look up at him and had to squint. 

“And as I have answered we aren't on the battlefield little mister so no need for such formalities. Just call me Henry and I'll call you Ashley my little friend. Oh I brought some for you as well.” The tower in front of me cheerfully responded as the reached in a large bag and pulled out a normal sized cookie and handed it to me. 

Each morning the same two men escorted the Ambassador to a local shop that has agreed to make a few sweets in the size of the Amazons. The embassy has a full kitchen, but I think the Ambassador is trying to endear himself to the locals. The shop is making a small fortune supplying them. He also sometimes brings me and my men some. I noticed my two men were awkwardly holding a cookie each. 

I took mine from his giant hand and thanked him. If I didn't it would have been a long argument of me saying no and having to take it eventually anyway. What the Ambassador calls a “tantrum”. 

The large man waved and said his goodbyes to “ little Tommy" and “little Joey" and I saw Specialists Thomas Ford and Joseph Fields get more uncomfortable. He all released a sigh of relief seeing the Ambassador back on what is technically Amazon soil. 

We tossed the cookies in the bin and I sent the men back to the small shed that we stayed in outside the embassy.  

I went around the east side of the building and lit a cigarette. I had to make sure I was not in view of the embassy windows as I smoked. We all did. If we were seen smoking by the Ambassador he would give us an earful about it being bad for our small lungs. He actually threatened by punish a few of my men for it. We complained about that one, but nothing came of it. This was an Ambassador from a superior dimension and also he was related to the head of there ruling party. Nothing to do but grin and bear this assignment. 
 

 

 

  • Like 2
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Isn't Ashley a girls name?

Where are the men are they on earth or in Ambassador Pools world?

There are a few mistakes but we can read them and understand what

was said or done.

Keep going and thanks for sharing.

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35 minutes ago, Eagle0769 said:

Isn't Ashley a girls name?

Where are the men are they on earth or in Ambassador Pools world?

There are a few mistakes but we can read them and understand what

was said or done.

Keep going and thanks for sharing.

Ashley can be a boy's name too.  Started out as a boy's name, if I recall.  Typically it is shortened to "Ash" but it's not unheard of to be "Ashley" either.

Based on context clues, I'm assuming that they are on Earth (or else a dimension very much like our Earth) since the Ambassador must be escorted to a bakery that agrees to make Amazon sized cookies.  Agreed kinda makes me think that it's a "special order" instead of the norm.

So I'm betting this story, should it continue, is going to be a subtle invasion arc.

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2 hours ago, Personalias said:

Ashley can be a boy's name too.  Started out as a boy's name, if I recall.  Typically it is shortened to "Ash" but it's not unheard of to be "Ashley" either.

Based on context clues, I'm assuming that they are on Earth (or else a dimension very much like our Earth) since the Ambassador must be escorted to a bakery that agrees to make Amazon sized cookies.  Agreed kinda makes me think that it's a "special order" instead of the norm.

So I'm betting this story, should it continue, is going to be a subtle invasion arc.

Thank you for explaining. I never knew Ashley could be a mans name. I thought it was on earth too just wasn’t sure. I like when the dimension is about a little girl but like it more with a little boy. Never read one with the Amazon is a guy. 

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9 hours ago, Eagle0769 said:

Thank you for explaining. I never knew Ashley could be a mans name. I thought it was on earth too just wasn’t sure. I like when the dimension is about a little girl but like it more with a little boy. Never read one with the Amazon is a guy. 

Fun fact: Lots of girls' names, were men's names first. Kelly, Carol, and Susan are all examples.

And yeah, I get liking a story about boy, too.  Especially if you're a boy.  Self-insert is a thing.

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I'm glad you guys seem to like it. To answer a few questions Ashley is a boy and they are on earth guarding an Amazonian embassy. Also if anyone has ideas or suggestions on ways you'd like the story to go please let me know. Here is part 2.

 

_________________

 

God. I never knew how fast or terribly an assignment could change. One little slip up and I have found my whole squad under the thumb of that asshole Ambassador. It was all Ford’s fault that the three of us are in this mess. He almost started an international shit storm too. The whole thing started like a normal event. Ambassador Pool was met at the gigantic door entrance to the Amazon embassy by my two specialists for the day for the normal coffee and cookie run. Watching them walk back was the oddest thing I’d experienced up to that point.

Pool was walking while firming holding on the hand of Fields. The full grown human male looked like a preschooler holding onto the giant’s hand like that and his expression was one of absolute mortification. He looked like he wanted to die and turned his head away as soon as he saw me. Ford was in a much worse situation. He was being carried with his head buried into Pool’s shoulder and Pool’s hand firmly under his ass. He had his arms around the Ambassador’s neck holding tight to the man.

“What is going on here?” I asked trying not the shout at a diplomat. 

“Well little Ashley I hate to say this, but one of your little boys got very out of line today. I don’t like the idea of a boy acting out and something has to be done when one does. Hopefully this little lesson can help you and little Joey as well. You can see what happens to little boys that act out. I’ll set this one down inside for you and little Joey can tell you about our instance at the cookie shop.” Pool answered. 

The whole statement was given in a serious tone that was unusual for the Ambassador. Once done he released Fields’ hand from his and brought Ford to his small tent.

As the Ambassador walked away with him I got a look at Ford’s face over the Amazon’s shoulder. His face was covered in tear and he had snot running from his nose. He was sniffling and obviously trying to regain some composure.

“Now wait just a da…” I started at him only to find myself grabbed and spun around by an erratic looking Field’s. He shook his head as if me not talking was the most vital thing in the world so I shut up and complied till the Ambassador had left Ford in his tent and returned inside. 

“Field you better have a damn good reason that you grabbed me or you’ll be choosing between an official reprimand or a boot to your guts.” I yelled at him.

“Trust me sir you wouldn’t have liked the outcome if you had finished that sentence. Shit when crazy today. Ford really messed up.” Fields responded.

“You have 5 minutes to explain.” I said.

He got it all explained  in 3 mins flat and then I made him tell me the whole thing again a few times. Apparently Ford really had messed up. While they 3 of them were waiting for the cookies to be bagged he went to the can in the restaurant. Ambassador Pool had grabbed the shoulder of a man coming out of the bathroom and asked him why he was always there right before they showed up and in the bathroom right before Ford entered it The man laughed, but then he bolted out the door like mad man. The Ambassador now knew something was up and grabbed Ford’s pack as soon as he came out. He tossed the contents on a table and found a small bag of cocaine and a notebook with info about the embassy. 

Ford tried to bolt too, but the Ambassador was ready this time and in the middle of the restaurant he relived Ford of his pants and “interrogated” him. He sat the man over his knee and spanked the devil out of his bare bottom. Fields had tried to interject, but was threatened with a spanking himself. In no time Ford was a blubbering mess and confessing everything about trading info about the embassy for a little coke left in the bathroom each day. The man that left earlier was a little from their world and part of some resistance of some kind.

“Worst of all was that I got I  trouble too. He made me hold his hand the whole time back and everyone in the town was laughing at us.” Fields said, now seeming to be tired out from talking. 

“Well thanks for explaining. You did everything right given the situation soldier. I better get on the coms and talk about this with the higher ups.”  I said.

“Well before we do that I have to tell you the bad part.” Fields said.

“Wait… drugs and espionage isn’t the bad part?!”


 

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