Wannatripbaby Posted June 11, 2019 Share Posted June 11, 2019 Huh. That was an unexpected answer. The question is: does she really have a girlfriend *now* or was she just confused by the 'shrooms and remembering when she *did* have a girlfriend? I feel like that wouldn't be a very satisfying answer thoughso I'm guessing it's the former. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 12, 2019 Author Share Posted June 12, 2019 18 hours ago, Wannatripbaby said: Huh. That was an unexpected answer. The question is: does she really have a girlfriend *now* or was she just confused by the 'shrooms and remembering when she *did* have a girlfriend? I feel like that wouldn't be a very satisfying answer thoughso I'm guessing it's the former. Good questions! I'll get more of this story up today! Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 12, 2019 Author Share Posted June 12, 2019 /// “She'll be okay. It was just a fever, that's all." Chloe and Claire didn't look at all convinced by my story, though and I shrugged my shoulders as they searched through my tote bag again. Mushrooms can't be absorbed by stuffing them down your underpants, can they? It was Chloe who responded. "She wasn't feverish before you went in there, and I've never seen her that way before." It was true that the giggling mess of a girl that Anna had been when Chloe opened the door was a little bit far removed from the cool and collected and very smart girl their daughter usually was. But I maintained my lie. "She started getting worked up when I saw her arms. I didn't mean to, you know? I tried to calm her down and then her anger turned into… I dunno. Delirium. I didn't give her anything. Do you think I'm an idiot?" It was dark out, now, and I felt like I'd told the same story a hundred times already. What did they know that I didn't? Chloe looked up at Claire at the mention of their daughter’s arms and Claire just gave her a small smile and kissed her forehead. It was Claire who spoke next. "We're really sorry. We just worry about our daughter. Sometimes to a fault. We don't mean to suspect you of anything or hurt your credibility. We're just worried." Chloe nodded and passed an apology, giving the kid his backpack back. "She didn't eat either…" Chloe left the two of them to clean the still full plates that she'd taken from my room. Despite having been given a chance to nap, she looked no less tired. I looked up at Claire and tilted my head to the side thoughtfully. "I didn't know that she had a girlfriend. I asked her once about the blank spot on her wall and she said that 'we don't talk about her'." Thoughtfully, I left out the 'if you wanna keep kissing' part of things. "I mean, I guess I figured she liked girls. Not to put too fine a point on it - she's just very liberal. But I guess I always got the impression she was flying solo." How do I express that without saying 'because we kiss all the time'? Fucking secrets man. Claire sighed, turning to the couch and sitting down, motioning for Star to sit down as well. It was only after he did that she spoke. It wasn't mean, though, despite the words that came out. It wasn't threatening, either. It was carefully painted words… just concern and seriousness in her voice. "Don't read into it. I mean that. Because if you do, she won't want you around." "Yeah. I got that. And I like her. I like her a lot. I guess that's a bad thing, but I don't have many friends. So I'm pretty protective of the ones I do make. My family will get evicted within the year, and I'll move and that'll be that. But until then, I wanna keep her safe." It sucked to know that the ex-girlfriend was still an active-girlfriend. I guess that meant I was just a novelty to her. Just a boy to kiss. Maybe she'd moved away, or maybe she needed space, I dunno. But I guess that ruled out any possibility of us hooking up. Welcome to Virginity-ville, Star. Population: Your pathetic ass. Still, I'd keep her safe. "Hey…" I climbed down the stairs, looking up at my mom and Star on the couch. A little memory flooded back into my head of having taken the little cracker before. Of getting loopy. Of falling asleep. I looked at the floor a little shyly. Mom ran out of the kitchen and almost tackled me to the ground in a hug. I smiled, taller than her on one of the steps, and hugged her back. "Sorry… I'm okay now… just needed some rest." "I guess I should go, yeah?" I stood up and smiled at Claire as I looked over at Chloe hugging her daughter. Chloe was definitely the actual Mom, I decided. Not that it meant she loved Anna any more or less than Claire did, though. It was an interesting family dynamic. "I'm glad you're feeling better, Anna." The trip really did seem to have helped her, and that made me happy. Not that she'd been in such a bad way, but at least that I was able to help. /// I sat across from Star the next day at lunch, handing him a cookie before he even opened his bag. "Hey Twinkle. Sorry I missed yesterday. And sorry about tripping out in the afternoon. I was just exhausted. Here." I handed him a second cookie. "To make up for it." "Fuck yeah cookies." I grinned and took a bite out of the first one, savoring it as she sat across from me. I didn't eat like most boys; most other guys would finish a cookie in two bites. It took me a dozen. Maybe I just liked to savor it, though, who could say? "You feeling better today, Angel?" It was such a trite nickname for such a unique girl, but whenever I looked at her now all I saw was hair that flowed into rivers of water and the halo that hovered above her head. I guess that's one of the things about mushrooms; the trip fades but it changes your perceptions for the best. "Yeah. Dunno. Just got all weird. The mushrooms actually really helped. I was out like a light! It was amazing." I flashed a very Anna-esque smile and nibbled on one of my cookies. It had certainly been a long day, yesterday. I knew my parents were still very worried about me, but I felt better today. I really did. "Told you there were better ways of escaping, right?" I grinned and finished the cookie and thought about how very much I wanted to ask Anna about her girlfriend. Now wasn't the time, though. I wasn't exactly sure when the time would be, either. Probably when I wasn't so afraid of losing kissing rights. "Mom and Dad grow them. They're usually always on a trip or waiting to recover so they can go on another one. I'm not quite like that. I have them every now and then when shit gets rough. It's funny, actually; we're so poor but I have like $400 worth of mushrooms in my school-bag. Go figure…" "Well. I'll buy some." I smiled at the boy across the table and reached into my pocket to pull out some extra money I liked carrying around. I passed twenty-two dollars across the table and finished off my last cookie before opening the M&M's and splitting them between greens and non-greens. "That's just payment for what I already had. I'll give you more soon." "You don't pay. We start this stuff, and then I'll feel like I owe you every time we go to Taco Bell. Fuck it. You get what you want when you want it and in exchange you take care of things like ice cream and burgers. Money's never something that friends should worry about anyway." I slid the money back and smiled. "Besides, I don't wanna miss out on going with you next time. Yesterday I didn't get to come because I was fending off your parents. That won't always be the case." The idea of actually having money had some appeal, but watching Anna become my angel again far outweighed any of those desires in a heartbeat. "So, you told me something while you were playing with my cheeks yesterday. Interesting bit of information, really." "Yeah?" The curiosity was only mild. I remembered very little of my haze. There were lots of colors and I'm pretty sure kittens were involved at some point, but that's about it. I definitely didn't recall playing with Star's cheeks. I took the money off the table and stuffed it back into my pocket - the twenty anyway. I gave the last two dollars back to Star. "For candy for afternoon class. I have more M&M's." "Keep stuffing me full of candy and I'll lose my girlish figure. Don't know if we want that." I grinned and looked away, playing things off as coyly as I could. "Well, anyway, so I heard rumors that the-thing-we're-not-supposed-to-talk-about isn't so much a closed chapter, if you get my drift. Now I'm not certain, but is the-unspeakable-topic going to be an issue for our make out sessions? Because that'd be a drag, sister." My eyes diverted across the room quickly and I changed the topic before she could answer. Maybe I was afraid of the answer… "Hey-heyhey, lookit that… who're they? They're sexy…" There were two boys against the window of the cafeteria, one pushing the other flat against the glass and mashing his lips upon his partner’s. "I love watching boys kiss…" "Yes, Twinkie-winkie - you're incredibly straight." I rolled my eyes and giggled, eating the red M&M's in pairs. What was he saying though? Rumors about something being closed or something? Why were boys such a hassle to figure out? "So what are you talking about with closed chapters? I don't get it." "You told me you have a girlfriend. Now it's cool if you've got this open thing going on and all, I'm down with that. Just nice to know in advance so I don't get too emotionally involved. I'm alright just being the boy you make out with. It's more than I've ever been with anyone else. Just helps to keep my expectations in check, yeah?" Twinkie-winkie? Really? I ate my green M&M's and looked back over at the two boys. "Okay. See. When two girls kiss there's no aggression. There's no sense of ownership. Like, when I kiss you? I'm pretty possessive. But two girls are just… you know that awkward moment in a mall when you try to get past someone and you're both too polite to go first? It's like that. But two boys kissing is like watching a beautiful struggle. I love it. Not that I'd ever kiss a guy again, but you know. I wouldn't start WW3, either, but I still like Dr. Strangelove." "Again?" I smiled at the boy in front of me and switched over to the yellow M&M's. I was pretty calm when I spoke next, and I'd figured he would want something on the topic. It was true that I hid the fact that I was with someone from him, after all. "Yeah, I'm dating someone. A girl. And I love her. But she knows about you. I've told her, so there's no drama. It's not like a girl can get by without her girlfriend around all the time, you know." "Well, s'long as she knows. I'm no home-wrecking hussy." The green M&M's depleted long before Anna made a dent in her own and I decided I could dig a little more. "So why's she blacklisted as a topic? Just don't want me getting illusions of grandeur about a ménage à trois? Or are you just embarrassed to introduce me to her cause I'm kind of a loser?" I smirked and gazed back at the two boys. I'm not obsessed! I just liked the eye-candy, that's all. "They'll get beat up soon. Such a shame." I put my finger to my lips and waited until he looked back. "We. Don't. Talk. About. Her. You're really quite a bad listener, you know." I passed him a few of my blue M&M's and poured the rest in my mouth regardless of color. Then I turned to the two kissing boys and smiled, my thoughts drifting away from me. "Right. Right." I nodded absently and looked at the boys one last time before getting up. "Wanna go sit outside and get fucked up? I got math after lunch and nobody cares about math. Find me some proper relatable use for trig in the real world and maybe I'll care…" I didn't usually fly so soon after the last time, but it meant getting to spend time with Anna and I was down with that. I wondered idly if her mysterious girlfriend would wanna get messed up with us one day. I looked up at the boy and shook my head out of the haze. Huh. I'd been daydreaming. "Nah. Mom's super worried about me after yesterday, but I did promise to try to not suck at school. For this week anyway. Ask me Monday." I stood up and waved goodbye to Star before making my way to my own afternoon classes. Shame. I smiled and wandered over to the window, watching the two boys kiss a while longer before the jocks appeared and started throwing punches. Double shame. Oh well. I went to class and thought about Anna. And I walked home and thought about Anna. And I slept and thought about Anna. Fuck. Am I falling for her? That'd be inconvenient. I realized as I lay there that I was beginning to look forward to school. I guess because it meant more time with Anna. 4 Link to comment
Wannatripbaby Posted June 12, 2019 Share Posted June 12, 2019 3 hours ago, Sophie ♥ said: "Keep stuffing me full of candy and I'll lose my girlish figure. Don't know if we want that." God, that's such a good line! Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 12, 2019 Author Share Posted June 12, 2019 16 minutes ago, Wannatripbaby said: God, that's such a good line! Star is a blessing! Link to comment
CDfm Posted June 13, 2019 Share Posted June 13, 2019 This story is amazing. You had me hooked with the first few paragraphs. Star’s life seems to be such a sad lonely one until now meeting Anna. That relationship seems to be rather precarious at best. I sure hope things work out for the two of them. I can’t wait to read more of this. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 13, 2019 Author Share Posted June 13, 2019 11 hours ago, CDfm said: This story is amazing. You had me hooked with the first few paragraphs. Star’s life seems to be such a sad lonely one until now meeting Anna. That relationship seems to be rather precarious at best. I sure hope things work out for the two of them. I can’t wait to read more of this. This means so much to us!! Ahhh thank you so much for the comments! More soon. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 13, 2019 Author Share Posted June 13, 2019 /// “Sit with my friends today." Though I didn't wait for Star to actually answer. I walked past him with my cookies, motioning for him to follow as if they were dog treats. Then I sat at a table in the corner with a few other people that looked… well, unique. Some dressed very interestingly, and some dressed as if they didn't care what they had on. My friends were individuals! "Everyone - this is Twinkle. Twinkle, everyone. Mostly they're not notable, except Linds. She's my best friend." A blonde girl across from us reading a book put her hand up and waved. Getting introduced as Twinkle wasn't exactly my first preference, but hey, whatever. I sat down next to Anna and the girl across from me - tall, cute, maybe Indian? - glanced at Anna inquisitively. "Twinkle, huh?" I shrugged and picked up one of the cookies and took a little bite. "Yup. Twinkle. No homo, tho." Among these people I actually felt relatively normal. It was nice to fit in, somewhat. Linds decided to put her book down after she finished her page and started eating yogurt with a white plastic spoon. I handed Star another cookie and ate my two myself. "I'm personally still quite sketchy on the gay stuff. He seems quite interested in boys, especially when they're making out or having sex." Linds giggled and pointed to a boy at the end of the table. "Cho's gay. Date him." Cho was a little too flamboyant to be be anything but gay. He wore his hair spiked in the back and had bangs. He was Korean. "I'm not gay. I just think guys having sex is hot. There's nothing gay about appreciating something hot, Angel." I puffed out my cheeks and looked at the cute boy at the end of the table. Okay, yeah. I'd probably watch him make out with another boy. I would've mentioned that I spent my afternoon cleaning Anna's tonsils with my tongue, but I wasn't sure how much I was allowed to reveal about that so I kept it to myself. "Anyway, I don't date. Too much drama. I just like to make out and get high. Easier that way, you know?" I rolled my eyes and finished my second cookie, standing up from the table. "Gotta go buy M&M's. Watch my bag, Twinkie-winkie." And I bounded off for the vending machines. "You'll fit in just fine here," Linds said with a smile. The boy really was an oddity. Their group was big on oddities. "I don't really fit in well. Kinda anti-social. A little bit awkward. A touch of passive aggressive and a dash of careless wit with collateral damage. You smile now, but you won't wanna know me in a week. I'm still confused as fuck why Anna keeps me around as long as she has." Probably for my mushroom hookup, the cynical side of my brain taunted and I frowned a little. More likely for the kisses, to be fair, sounded the reason side of me. I didn't like that, either. "What's your story?" I looked at Linds, and then down at Cho. "You're really cute, by the way. Didn't wanna say it in front of Anna 'cause she gives me enough shit as is. But you are." "Like I said. You'll fit in fine." Linds smiled widely at the boy across from her and finished her yogurt. "No story. I'm Lindsay - Linds for short. I've known Anna since she was in diapers. We've just been friends ever since, I guess. We go through good times and bad together. And that's it. Here we are." "I knew a girl two schools ago that still wore diapers. Not because she needed to. Just that she dug it. Didn't quite get that, but we've all got our quirks, right?" I tried to think why I'd brought that up and frowned a little, adding in, "So I guess 'since she was in diapers' is a relative term.” “You can call me Star, by the way. My name's Twinklestar. I prefer Star, but Anna prefers Twinkle. Or Twinkie-winkie for some reason. Don't really get that one. Nice necklace, by the way. Matches your earrings. I think you want a lighter gloss for your lips, though. Where's Anna? I'm babbling." "You are babbling. And Tinkie-winkie is a character from a children's television show, so I imagine that's the reference. You don't watch a lot of TV, do you?" Most of the table in and of itself was self-reactive and could converse without the need to engage in the reaction between Linds and Star. Only Cho was listening in. "Yeah. We don't own a TV. Parents are hippies. I'd tell you more, but Anna thinks I obsess over parents - mine and hers - so I'll spare you. Any TV I see is when I'm at Best Buy or at Anna's. She's got a nice TV. One of those ones that go on the wall. Me, I do all my school papers on a typewriter. Not even kidding." I never talked about these things in a pitiful way, it was just a 'haha isn't this messed up?' presentation. "So… " Warning, Star. Don't do it. "If I were interested in Anna, is there anything I should know? If she has a cock it's not a deal breaker, mind you…" "Don't waste your time." That was Cho, though the cynical comment didn't come across very rude in his candy-sweet dialect. Linds just shrugged and nodded in agreement. The idea of trying to be with Anna was a big taboo. No one even bothered considering it. But he was the new kid. "Rewards are proportionate to work put in, yeah? I think she's worth a bit of effort." It wasn't like me to be so verbose with my affections, though, and after a moment I leaned back into the table and frowned. "Yeah, you guys are right. Who am I kidding? Girl like that. Way way out of my league." Maybe I should just date Cho... Linds looked at Cho and she bit her lip. Cho went back to his conversation with another boy and Linds went back to her book. It was then that I came back and sat down, opening my package of M&M's and picking out the greens from non-greens. But instead of passing them to Star, I passed them across the table to Linds. "Oh, don't pout, Twinkie, I got you your own package." And I tossed him an opened pack of M&M's. "You opened my M&M's? Bitch…" I grinned and looked inside the pack, trying to figure out what colors she'd made off with. I guess it figured with me integrated into her little group now, any special treatment I once got was probably gone. That was fine, though. "So. I got yelled at last night. About borrowing the stuff. Of course my parents never discipline. They just said they'd give me my own supply so I wouldn't have to take theirs without asking. My parents are so fucked up…" "Truly." I nodded in agreement and ate my M&M's in pairs. Linds read her book while she nibbled at the green M&Ms on the table. Cho wasn't paying attention anymore. And that's how lunch went. Very uneventful. I took off before the bell rang, waving goodbye to everyone and pulling my messenger bag out from under Star's feet. I followed Linds out of the lunch room and waited until we were alone before pulling her aside. "Okay. Anna. Girlfriend. What's going on? Because nobody will give me a straight answer and it's kind of a big deal for me." What was wrong with me? I'm not this. I'm not a gossip queen. It wouldn't get me anywhere anyway. But I had to know. She looked very surprised, blinking a few times before giving the ceremonial "what…?" They'd just left the lunch room and were mostly-alone except for a few passersby. Linds stepped off to the side to let people pass and looked at the new boy with curiosity. "What are we talking about? I feel like I missed a segue…" Fuck. Had I spilled the beans? I recovered smoothly, "You guys got all weird when I asked about dating her. So I figure she has someone, right? I just wanna know who I'm up against so I know how to play my hand, that's all." Having parents that spent all their lives making up half-truths really helped at times. "Uh… no. She's single. She's just not easy to date. She's a complicated girl…" She took a moment to analyze Star before continuing. "Look, I like you and all, and I love Anna, but… you really shouldn't be going after her. You won't make things any better for her and certainly not for you." "Life's a game, Linds. You don't play it on the hardest difficulty and you're just cheating yourself out of the rewards. See ya tomorrow at lunch time." I kissed her cheek in a very European way and made my way to class. She's a complicated girl alright. The fact her best friend doesn't even know she's dating someone is a pretty good start already when it comes to the kind of complication in store. I decided I'd meet her after school. /// “What's with you? You're all introspective and shit.” I pulled a cigarette from my pocket and lit one up, offering one over to the quiet boy next to me. "If you're gonna have one, do it now. You're sure as hell not doing it in the car." The thin white stick slipped into my lips and I lit it from the same worn-down matchbook as before, feeling the sickly sensation of being able to afford nice things fill my veins. After a few drags, I motioned to the car. "Let me drive. What's the worst that can happen? Right now you've been in more accidents than I have." Never mind the fact I didn't have a license, or have the vaguest idea what I was doing. She'd say no. I knew she would. But maybe if I asked enough times she'd come around. Hm. He had a point… and he was my friend. "Sure." I passed the keys to Star and climbed into the passenger seat instead. It wasn't until both of the doors were closed and I was buckled up that I continued my train of thought. "But if you get us in an accident, you're paying for the repairs. Chloe will be pissed.“ "Sure. With all the money I make, that'll be a breeze. Think they'll take mushrooms as payment? I could imagine your parents tripping." I put the car into reverse and drove backward entirely too quickly, spun the steering wheel hard to the right, and peeled out of the school car-park onto the main road. "This ain't so hard." Though the notion of a speed limit seemed lost on me as I careened down the residential streets doing eighty. "I wish they made more seat belts for each seat." I held onto the door tightly as I watched Star drive down the road going way too fast. A sickness filled my stomach. “You should slow down. Do you even know where you're going?" "Stop being such a crybaby," I pulled out onto the interstate onramp and then up onto the freeway with more weight on the gas pedal. "How fast does this thing go, Anna? Have you ever tried?" At three in the afternoon, most of the three lanes on the highway were empty enough to really push the limits. And the large SUV didn't show any signs of being at the end of its tether. "The little gauge goes up to 200. Do you think it can go that fast?" I closed my eyes. I didn't want to seem scared, but I sort of was. This kid might not have driven a day in his life and he definitely didn't have a license. My handing him the keys could've meant my death sentence. Naivety filled me with guilt. What the fuck was I doing? “Just get us home in one piece.” "You know what it's like when you take a mushroom, Anna? When you lose all control of your mundane every day life for a brief moment and just let go and fly?" My heart was pounding as the SUV flew along the freeway with no real sense of where we were going. "Isn't it a rush? Isn't this just the same? We could die in a heartbeat, or we could live for a hundred years and this moment might be the defining factor. Close your eyes and enjoy the rush, Anna. Let go of the greyscale and embrace the color." "You're fucking crazy." I didn't yell it. Just a simple statement. I wasn't enjoying myself. I didn't want to risk dying just because this stupid kid wanted a rush. A vision of my body twisted and mangled filled my head. Smoking was one thing, slow and simple. This was dangerous in a totally different way. I felt frozen. Sick. I shouldn’t have given the keys to Star. Not an Anna thing to do. I closed my eyes tight. I slowed the car down and pulled off at the next exit, coming to a stop not long after that on the side of the road. "You've got a lot of tension built up in there, huh Angel? You failed the test." I slid up out of the drivers seat and plopped down in the back, laying out across the length of the seat. "Come on, let's get back to your place and fly for a few hours." I hadn't meant to be mean, but I expected more of Anna. She really seemed the type to enjoy a moment frozen in time. Maybe it was a control thing for her; maybe she had to choose to surrender her control instead of having me do it for her. But when I looked over at her, she wasn’t moving. Her eyes were closed. I could see the worry in the space between her eyebrows. Wait, did I really do something wrong? 4 Link to comment
Wannatripbaby Posted June 13, 2019 Share Posted June 13, 2019 Alright, let's address the elephant in the room: 1 hour ago, Sophie ♥ said: "I knew a girl two schools ago that still wore diapers. Not because she needed to. Just that she dug it. Didn't quite get that, but we've all got our quirks, right?" I tried to think why I'd brought that up and frowned a little, adding in, "So I guess 'since she was in diapers' is a relative term.” This is the only story on this site where you could have a character make a statement like that and not have it be the main plot point lol. Very clever. :D Also perhaps it's the CG side of me, but that whole driving sequence filled me with anxiety. ? Link to comment
CDfm Posted June 14, 2019 Share Posted June 14, 2019 9 hours ago, Sophie ♥ said: Wait, did I really do something wrong? LOL I really had to laugh at this. Heck I was even scared. It strange how things like that change during your life. I have jumped out of planes and helicopters, I have repelled and fast roped out of helicopters, I have driven a car going 165 mph and never batted an eye. Now that I am older and have children and grandchildren I am a big chicken. I was very happy I got a like back to give to this story. I am looking forward to reading more. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 15, 2019 Author Share Posted June 15, 2019 On 6/13/2019 at 3:35 PM, Wannatripbaby said: This is the only story on this site where you could have a character make a statement like that and not have it be the main plot point lol. Very clever. :D ^_~ Puddin's a clever mouse. On 6/13/2019 at 11:53 PM, CDfm said: Heck I was even scared. It strange how things like that change during your life. Yeah, it's all perspective. Puddin has been in a car crash before, so she's SUPER anxious about car trips where someone else is driving. So I always let her drive. (Though I actually love it because I get to play on my phone! ^_^ ) Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 15, 2019 Author Share Posted June 15, 2019 /// I finally opened my eyes and looked at Star with exhaustion. “Can I drive?” I asked. He kicked open the door and I slipped into the driver's seat without getting out of the car. I pulled us back onto the freeway at a normal speed, but I didn't go home. I stopped at Star's house and cut the engine in the driveway. He looked up at me and I turned toward the passenger seat. "I'm not really in the mood to hang out. Think I could just see you tomorrow instead?" I leaned forward and kissed the boy on the cheek without giving him a chance to answer. "Glad you understand." I didn't get out of the car though, even with the kiss. As Anna stared at me expectantly I leaned back on the chair and smiled. "Wanna come in?" I motioned to my house with a nod of my head. Things were a little awkward with Anna since I found out she had a girlfriend and I didn't really want that awkwardness to be a thing. I liked it better the way we were before, and figured I was lucky just to have her as a friend. "Nah. I have somewhere I wanna go before my parents get home. If you don't mind." I smiled a little and motioned to the door. "I promise we can hang out tomorrow. We can even do some more mushrooms if you want." "Take me with you?" Why was I being so clingy today? I couldn't figure it out, so I just started to babble. "I saw you in a pretty bad way, recently, and it made me think about things. Like your arms. Like how you hurt yourself. And I've only just got to be a part of your life, Angel. I don't want your name to be literal. Wherever you're going, take me with you. I've shown you mushrooms. Shown you a part of who I am. Show me something of who you are?" I sighed and turned back to the windshield, starting the engine and pulling out of the driveway. Why was I bringing him along? I never brought anyone along. We drove for a long time in complete silence. The city went away pretty quick and then the houses. It wasn't for an hour that I stopped the car and climbed out in the middle of a dirt road. No one was around for miles. I went to the trunk and pulled out a cotton comforter, trekking my way into the tall grass. I didn't say anything for the entire drive, figuring that I was lucky enough that she'd given me my request in the first place. Even when we got to our destination - a dirt road in the middle of BFE - I still remained quiet. She got out of the car and pulled out a comforter and began walking into the grass. What was this? I frowned a little and stepped out of the car, following her a few paces behind as the grass brushed against my legs. Where were we going? I finally stopped a few hundred feet away from the car and laid out the blanket, sitting down on it with my legs crossed, facing away from the car. I waited for Star to sit down before I explained. "Look out there… it's hard to find a place like this so close to the city. No houses. No trees. Just an empty horizon. Doesn't the sky look so big?" The blue sky, usually such a vast thing in itself, was now blanketing the entire area. It touched the horizon as low as it could and then extended above us as high as it could. It had wisps of white clouds in the higher parts, but the horizon was crystal blue. If I turned upside down, I could've been convinced it was a waveless ocean. It really struck me as strange to see someone like Anna being so profound. She was a girl about instant gratification, a little self-centered and a little self-sacrificing at the same time. But this…? Glory of the world and all that? It seemed more my thing than hers, and I followed her long gaze into the blue above. "Is this place special to you, Angel?" Everything felt balanced here. The air was warm, but the breeze was temperate, the sky was blue but not impossibly bright. And if I looked high enough it was like being surrounded. "I used to come here with Juliet. We'd sit and stare at the sky. Just sit. And that'd be all… some days we'd talk, but those were only the cloudy ones where the sky wasn't nearly as bright. We'd talk about maybe a future together. But it's a blue day today, Star, so we're just gonna sit. I hope that's okay." And I didn't say another word for hours. Juliet? It was nice to put a name to the girlfriend who'd thus far been absent from the little piece of Anna's life she shared with me. She talked about things in the past tense, about the things she used to do and her tongue was wistful and longing. What had happened to Juliet? It didn't take a scientist to know that she was talking about someone who was no longer a part of her life. So we sat, and we watched the sky in silence. Sometimes I'd watch her, watch the light radiate from her doll-like skin and watch the dreams dance in her eyes. She was beautiful, and I wanted to kiss her. But now seemed not to be the time. The sky started turning and off-shade of blue and I respectfully stood and packed up my blanket. I walked solemnly back to the car with Star and put the blanket into the trunk, climbing into the driver's seat and going back into town. We didn't go to Star's though. We parked outside my house and I sat and looked up at the sky. It was almost red. It would be sunset soon. "…where is she, Anna?" It was a no-no to ask, I knew that. But I also knew if there was any time she might be willing to talk to me about it, now would be it. Or rather, any time she might need someone to talk to about it, anyway. It was weird; I was usually self-serving enough that I would leave well enough alone and not risk my own benefits for the sake of a question. But now it seemed right. "We don't talk about her, Star." It was a simple enough statement, but my voice was different to all the other times I'd said it. It wasn't absolute; it was sleepy, exhausted. I climbed out of the car, walking ahead of Star on our way into the house. "Where have you been?! It's almost eight! You could've called or something!" "Sorry, Mom… phone was off. I was just at Twinkle's. Yeah - he's right here." I motioned to the boy behind me and Chloe settled down a little, biting her lip nervously. Claire came out and kissed her forehead. "How about you two relax. I'm almost done with dinner." I sighed a little at being shut out again, but figured I was lucky to have been included as much as I had been. When we got Anna's bedroom to drop off our bags, I looked at her with a smile of gratitude. "Thanks for taking me with you, today." I made sure to keep my voice low. "If you ever want to take me with you again, I'd love to go." I didn't push the issue past that, and I didn't ask about Juliet again. I sat down at her desk and began to clean off my nails with a cotton ball, sorting through her other nail polishes for a color I liked. "Come on, sit with me." I sat next to Star, watching him clean off his nails. I didn't wait for him to finish though. I leaned up and kissed his lips, smiling at him as I pulled away. "I'm glad I brought you too… thank you." I backed away then, smiling softly to myself, looking back at the colors of nail polish. Sometimes it was hard knowing what the right thing was with Anna, but I guess that meant I was just more inclined to be me and hope for the best. I picked out a shade of pink and began to do my thumb as I had before. "In a different life, would you ever have dated a boy like me? I'm kinda queer, I'm told. Or that's what my best friend thinks, anyway. I think it's perfectly fine to prefer gay porn and paint my fingernails. Maybe she's just closed minded, who knows?" I smiled and put my hand out for Star to paint my thumb too. "Yeah. She sure sounds it." I smiled to myself and put my head on his shoulder as Star painted my fingernail. But there was a knock on the door a few moments later and I climbed away from the desk without a top coat. "Dinner's ready, kids." I followed Claire downstairs, Star on my tail. I hated to leave her thumbnail unfinished - top coat was very important; every slightly queer boy knew that. But the smell of dinner that wafted up the staircase made the thought seem significantly less important to me. I sat down at the table next to Anna and one of her moms looked across at me with a smile, "That's a lovely nail color, Star. Do you think your boyfriend will like it?" Boyfriend? Oh. Yeah. They think I'm gay. I shrugged my shoulders nonchalantly and smiled. "Well, I'm sure my potential Mister Right would need to like my painted nails. It's at the end of a long list of requirements, though. He needs to think I'm pretty. He needs to put up with my rambling. He needs to know that I have no money. He needs to cuddle me when I'm down. And he needs to be the kind of boy who wears a shitload of eyeliner."I decided days ago that I liked Anna's parents. Better so than my own parents, at any rate. Claire giggled but Chloe seemed unimpressed. She must still be worried about my having not come straight home. It was, after all, a rule that I be home when they got here. We ate chicken that night with mashed potatoes and garlic bread. Always garlic bread. I spent most of my time munching down on the latter. "How was school today?" Chloe asked. "Oh! I know, I know! You know how I know? Because I was there." I smiled proudly and Chloe gave me a smile in return. "It's true. She was there all day. I thought maybe aliens had arrived - you know, the sort that have infiltrated the government like my parents have been warning me about for years? Yeah. I thought they arrived and infiltrated Anna and now she was actually a lizard with a human face. But I checked for any signs of a tail and she came back clean so it was actually her at school today." I loved chicken. It gave me a slight belly ache, but nothing compared to the suffering than red meats put me through. I could actually enjoy it without the overhanging sense of dread. "I like chicken. A lot. You guys sure I can't live here? I'll get a cute maids uniform and keep the place tidy. Can teeter around on six inch stilettos and dust things in high places for your entertainment." Chloe rolled her eyes but she still smiled. Claire and I couldn't stop laughing. It was Claire who offered, "If we ever need a live-in maid we promise you'll be the first we contact. Though until then, you're welcome to come over for dinner whenever you'd like. Any friend of Anna's is welcome in this home." "Great. Because I'm sure all the soy products my parents feed me are primarily responsible for my effeminate nature. You three will make a manly man out of me, I'm sure." I raised a drumstick up with a smile as though it were a trophy. "To chicken, the greatest of the cows." I wasn't being showy, and Anna knew that - I was just being my usual bizarre self. Chloe was always much more serious than Claire, but it was nice to get a smile out of her regardless. I just wished someone would tell me what was going on with Juliet. Claire helped Chloe with the dishes, leaving Star and me alone at the table. "Too… much… bread…" I whimpered, my head on the tablecloth. Yes, this was a reoccurring theme. Chloe came out a second later and passed both of us a smile before saying. "It's getting late. You should take Twinkle home soon." I puffed out my cheeks a little at the fact that Twinkle was spreading as a name for me, but like most of my emotions it was vaguely fleeting and I nodded my head in agreement. "She's having a bread coma. I'm sure one day she'll just start giving birth to little loaves of bread with too much eyeliner." The chair squeaked a little as I pushed it in and smiled. "I can walk, really. I already eat your food. Last thing I should be doing is using all your gas, too." I pouted and shook my head, climbing up from my chair. "Be back soon!" I stepped outside and zipped my jacket the rest of the way up, smiling up at Star. "It's getting cold. It's already October. I don't want you walking after sunset anymore, okay?" But I didn't wait for an answer before skipping off to the car, starting it up. So… she wasn't my girlfriend, she was my Mom? I rolled my eyes to myself and stepped into the passenger seat with a coy smile. "That sounded like concern in your voice, Angel? You're not getting too attached to me, I hope? I mean, I'm just a boy after all." The heat from the vents was lovely, though, and despite my offer to walk home I was much happier to be sitting here in Anna's SUV with her. "Oh no, certainly not. If you want to freeze on your way home so the elementary students can find you in a block of ice the next morning, be my guest. But my parents seem to like you. I wouldn't want you dying or anything." I smiled at the boy and waited for the heat to kick in before driving down the road. "Well, Claire does. I think Chloe sees me for the awkward weird kid I am. She's a smart cookie, that one." Funny thing is, I saw so much of both of her parents in Anna that it was harder as time went by to figure out who was her primary influence. I was closer to my Mom, though that wasn't saying much because I didn't exactly model myself off my deadbeat parents. "I really should have put a top coat on your thumb, Angel. It's going to get all chipped and icky if I don't…" "I'll probably just take it off tomorrow or something anyway." I smiled at the boy next to me and drove down the street. Most of the trip was silent, but I liked that he was taking a shine to my parents. Most people find the idea of two moms almost like a side-show attraction. I was glad Star saw them for what they were - people. I pulled into Star's driveway but kept the engine on this time. It was cold out, after all. "So I'll see you tomorrow?" "I'll be there." I kissed her lips in the dim-light of the car and smiled a little with red cheeks as I pulled away and left the car. Since when did I blush over a kiss? Fuck man. Get it together. I found my way inside and snuck off to my little sanctuary. I'd miss her when we were gone. The cycle was always the same with my parents. Get a place, never pay rent, make excuses all year long and eventually get kicked out. We averaged a year or so in each state we lived in before having to move on. I made it a rule to keep my distance from others for that reason, but it was becoming harder and harder to do that with Anna. 4 Link to comment
Wannatripbaby Posted June 17, 2019 Share Posted June 17, 2019 Sorry I'm late to the party. I thought you guys didn't upload on the weekends? And once again DD neglected to inform me that you had uploaded the next chapter. Anyhoo, that was great! Still have no idea what the deal with Juliet is. All I know is Star needs to ease off the pressure a bit or things are gonna get ugly. Grammar Patrol: On 6/15/2019 at 6:50 AM, Sophie ♥ said: But there was a knock on the door a few moments later and I climbed away from the desk without a top coat. "Dinner's ready, kids." I followed Claire downstairs, Star on my tail. Shouldn't the "Dinner's ready, kids" have been in Claire's color? Link to comment
CDfm Posted June 18, 2019 Share Posted June 18, 2019 It sure seems like it’s taking a long time but with every chapter we learn just a little more about Anna. I think I am about as eager to learn more about Juliet as Twinkle is. Very happy I could give this a like and I am absolutely looking forward to reading more. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 18, 2019 Author Share Posted June 18, 2019 17 hours ago, Wannatripbaby said: Grammar Patrol: Edited! I basically post whenever I can these days, Trip. But you're right - usually it's not on the weekends. I'm going to try to finish this story sometime this week tbh. I don't want to drag it out. Thank you both for the continued readership. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 18, 2019 Author Share Posted June 18, 2019 “Come onnnnnn," I whimpered. "I have schoolwork." "School's for losers!" "Then I'm a loser." "Please! Just for dinner? It could be a date?" "Yeah, and what about him?" Linds pointed to Star. "We can bring Cho. A double gay date!" Linds rolled her eyes and shrugged. "Fine. But only dinner." "Kickass." I… what? Something about dating Cho? I frowned and looked up from my cookie, making it a point to stay more in touch with the conversations going on around me. Stupid cookie devotion. "I'm dating Cho now? Alright. But only if he's the boy. No point in being queer if I'm just going to do the same stuff I'd do with a girl." I still had no idea what I'd been volunteered for, but I still had half a cookie so I guess it didn't really matter. Not until I finished it, anyway. "So… what's going on…?" "Double date tonight. You're with Cho and Linds is going with me. We're gonna hit a diner on the edge of town. But Linds has schoolwork so we won't be out long." School was less interesting after that. Cho, Linds, and Star met me at my car after classes. Linds got shotgun. Cho decided to use this date to his advantage, though, sitting as close to Star as possible. Cho put his head on my shoulder - he was Asian, so I was taller - so I shrugged and went along with it as Linds and Anna chatted with each other in the front seat. "So. Never dated a boy before. Anything I should know? I mean, I know a lot from porn stuff, but not on the dating side of things. Like, who opens the door for whom? And who orders? Man, dynamics. I wonder how Anna's moms handle it." Cho was a little close, but it seemed to make him happy and it didn't make me unhappy, so I just went with it. "Man, you talk a lot." Cho pouted a bit and cuddled closer. "Oh, back off him, Cho." He only pouted more and shifted back into his seat, buckling the seat belt before I pulled out onto the main street. "If you don't set boundaries, he's gonna be all over you," I warned Star. “I don’t think enough. If I thought more, I'd talk less." I didn't mind the affection, really; if it made someone else happy I didn't feel as though I had the right to complain. Cho kept cuddling up and making sly little advances, so I figured I could just save us both some time and sate his curiosity if I just cut to the chase. So I pinned the small Korean boy down to the backseat and kissed his lips once, then twice, and then sat back up with a little smile. He stayed laying down looking lost in a daze and I felt particularly proud of myself. "Boundaries set." Linds looked a little astonished but I certainly didn't. I only smiled and pulled into the parking lot of the diner, parking the car and killing the engine. Cho was just sitting up, still in a daze, and I climbed out of the car and the others followed. Cho was very slow though. Poor boy. "Looks like you've found yourself a boyfriend," I smiled up at Star with a giddy smile. "I don't do boys. I'm not gay." I shrugged casually and waited for Cho to get out of the car, helping him to his feet and closing the door behind him, "So what is this place? Do they do potato skins? I fucking love potato skins." Of course I would've eaten just about anything when it meant I didn't have to pay for it, and whenever I was with Anna is was pretty much assumed I wouldn't be paying. "Just a diner. And I think they do potato skins." I looked and Linds and she nodded. "Yup, they do." We walked inside, where we had the luxury of seating ourselves. That was one of my favorite things about diners instead of restaurants. We picked a booth in the corner and I sat next to Star, Linds across from me. The waitress came over and we ordered. I had chicken strips and Linds had a salad. Cho ordered only a basket of fries. Cho kept playing with my feet with his and smiling coyly across the table. "You know, I bet with a bit of eyeliner and lipgloss we could make Cho into a girl. Some boys are just that pretty, huh?" "You think I'm pretty?" He kept smiling at me and I shrugged. "Well, yeah, you fit right in with Angel and Linds," My gaze shifted to the TV on the far wall and I tried to figure out what was on. When you don't get any TV at home, you don't really get a good sense of what you're watching when you do see one. "Gonna use the bathroom. Be right back." "Oh! I'll go!" So I climbed out from the booth and followed Linds down the hallway. She was a bit hard to keep up with because she was so much taller than me. That left Cho and Star alone. "So… you still chasing Anna?" The boy was a little disappointed in the topic, but he wasn't stupid. "I dunno, what do you think I should do?" It seemed odd asking for advice about a girl from a boy who dug me, but Cho was all I had right now. "I mean, I know she's not interested in me. But you probably know I'm not that interested in you, either. So why do we do it? Why do we put ourselves through the wringer for something we can't have?" It was more a philosophical question than a literal one and I pondered it for a few more moments. "You know. If I were gay, Cho? I'd date the shit out of you. You're fucking beautiful. Wanna make out until they get back?" He shook his head and smiled brightly. It was genuine too. "No thanks. I'll hold out for someone who actually wants me. I suggest you do the same." And the small Korean boy went back to blowing bubbles in his chocolate milk. Linds and I sat back down and I looked over at the two boys. Cho seemed more lively now, but Star a little crestfallen. "You okay, Twinkie-winkie?" "I'm gonna go get some air, feeling a bit queazy." I smiled a smile that was nowhere near as genuine as Cho's was and excused myself. I went to the front of the diner and stepped outside in the chilled afternoon air. Maybe Cho was right. Maybe I shouldn't be so interested in Anna. Maybe she was trouble. But that amount of trouble was so damn interesting… she was like a well written novella and I wanted to know so much more. "Hey - you alright? It's getting cold out here you know…" I stepped out after Star and stood next to him, staring at the parking lot in the afternoon sun. Somehow, despite the brilliant blue sky, today was very cold. I guess that's what October felt like. "Just thinking. You know. Stupid stuff. And I only talk so much because I think so little, so if I get thoughtful it means I wind up quiet and awkward." I pulled myself up onto a bike-rack and looked down at Anna with a solemn smile. "I think I hurt Cho. I didn't mean to. I just wanted to give him what he wanted, but I guess he figured that I don't want him and he got pouty." Actually, it seemed like Cho was happier after I'd told him. Weird kid. "Got a lot on my mind, that's all." I stood in front of the bike rack and smiled up at the boy. "Sometimes people need to get quiet and awkward. Not everything can be expressed with words, Twinkle. And Cho will bounce back. But I told you from the start. Set boundaries. Because if you let someone think something can happen when it can't, you're only going to hurt them in the end." I considered that for a few moments, and then asked, "You mean like when you told me I shouldn't think of myself as your boyfriend?" Her words did resonate in my head when she spoke about boundaries. She'd done her part. So why was I such a bad listener? Why did I want her so badly, anyway? I just didn't get it. Fuck. Maybe Cho's right. Maybe I shouldn't keep thinking there's a chance. "Exactly." I kissed his cheek and held his hand only to let it go a moment later. "Come inside when you're ready. I'll order some extra potato skins for you, alright?" And I went back inside. Our food had arrived so I sat down and started eating my chicken, dipping it in barbecue sauce as I went along. "He alright?" I nodded at Linds. "He just wanted time to think." /// Part of me just wanted to get up and go home, but it would've been rude to do so and I was a lot of things, but I wasn't rude. So after a few more minutes in the cold I forced a little smile and wandered back inside, taking my seat next to Anna and putting my foot up beneath the table to rest coyly on Cho's crotch. "Potato skins are god's true gift to women." I picked up one of the little vessels of deliciousness and my painted thumb shined in the light as I brought it to my lips. Cho's cheeks lit up like Christmas tree lights and I looked over at him, then Star, and went back to my chicken fingers. We spent all of the afternoon and some of the evening there chatting, despite what I'd told Linds about being able to study. But by the time my parents were supposed to be home I sent a quick text from my phone explaining the situation, then turned back to my friends. I spent most of the time we were there with my foot between Cho's legs; we were the outer pair on the table so it was probably pretty evident to anybody who looked our way, but he was a nice kid and he deserved a little reward for putting up with my crap. It's not like the girls knew, anyway, and despite Cho's bloodshot cheeks, my own composure was perfectly calm. "Look, I just don't see the issue. If someone wants to do drugs, it's their choice. Even if it fucks them up." Linds had been leading the conversation about deadbeat addicts and I was playing devil’s advocate. "Yeah, but look at you, Star. Your parents named you Twinkle. You really think addicts should have kids?" "Well I wouldn't be here if they hadn't." "Case and point.” Linds smiled and I rolled my eyes, though I couldn't help but smile too. I pushed Star off to the side and I saw Cho jump at the action. I blinked in confusion and shoved Star again until he moved off the booth. I climbed up with my purse and smiled at the table. "I'm gonna go pay. You guys leave tip. Be right back." And I departed, leaving Linds to put a tip on the table. Cho didn't bother. "One day, I'll come back to places like this with actual money and tip." Linds shook her head and left enough for the four of us and we stood up. Well, I did. Cho was a lot slower off the mark, standing up with scarlet cheeks and a sizable lump in his pants. Wow. Impressive for a Korean boy. Linds followed and I took Cho's hand in mine, leading the dazed boy to the counter. "I want a Twinkie. But I think that would make me a cannibal…" I paid the cashier at the front and my three friends met me at the counter, Star talking about Twinkies. Then a thought sprung through my head. Like a magical eureka moment, when some dude discovered electricity or how atoms work. “We're the Teletubies!" I smiled excitedly at my friends. "Twinkie-winkie. Lindsay. Anna. Cho." My friends looked at me incredulously, like I’d just said the stupidest thing in the world. I pouted and crossed my arms. "Well… it's true!" I led the way outside, opening up my car and waiting for everyone to pile in. Linds had shotgun again. "…I really need to figure out what the fuck a Teletubby is…" Linds had explained, briefly, but I got the notion by the looks that Cho and Linds gave that it wasn't a compliment to be compared to them. I lay down in the back-seat and put my head on Cho's lap, cuddling up to get comfortable as I looked at the ceiling of the car. "We should do this more often, Angel. I like not having to go home after school. Home sucks balls." The small Korean boy played with Star's hair and I sighed and smiled a little. Maybe he would find happiness… "Yeah. The Teletubby group. That's what we'll call it." "Please don't call it that…" "Come on! It can't be coincidence that those are our names!" "Yeah, but I have to be the one that looks like he has a penis on his head." I laughed and so did Cho. Linds wasn't amused though. I drove Linds home first, letting her out of the front seat. No one claimed it though. I would occasionally look back at the two boys in the back seat. /// Sleep must have found me somewhere long the line because when I opened my eyes, everybody else was gone and Anna was leaning over my head from the opened door of the car. It took a few moments to realize that was why she was upside down. "Oh.. hey. Did I fall asleep? Fuck. I'm sorry. I didn't say goodbye to Cho…" I rubbed my eyes and squeezed them tight a few times to try and clear my head. "How long have I been asleep?" "Not sure. Maybe fifteen minutes. Cho said bye though." I climbed into the back seat of my car next to Star, pulling the door closed behind me as he sat up. "Hey. I just wanna talk a minute before you go. We're at your house now, I just… how do you feel about Cho? I'm just wondering." I wasn’t jealous. I swear. "He's a sweet kid. Being a gay boy is kinda hard at school, I bet - lesbians get all this affection but queer boys just get beat up. So I guess he's brave. It'll pay off - he'll find someone. He's far from the only queer kid at our school. You saw those two boys making out the other day. Anyway, I think he's a sweetheart." I rubbed my eyes and sat up next to Anna with a little smile. "You think he'll find someone? I guess everyone does in time. I might not, though; I think the only girl in the world who'd handle my quirks has her interests focused elsewhere. It's a shame." I took a deep breath and talked as sternly as I could. "Listen, if you don't like Cho please don't lead him on, okay? You know how hard it is to be openly gay at school. He doesn't need all the conflicting feelings. So just… cut it out." I looked at Star just a few feet away from me. He looked quite taken-aback by my comment, though. "…yeah. I get it." I opened the door and stepped out of the car, walking up to the front step of my house without looking back. 4 Link to comment
Wannatripbaby Posted June 18, 2019 Share Posted June 18, 2019 1 hour ago, Sophie ♥ said: "Listen, if you don't like Cho please don't lead him on, okay? You know how hard it is to be openly gay at school. He doesn't need all the conflicting feelings. So just… cut it out." Hey, this whole gay date night was YOUR idea, Anna! ? Grammar Patrol: 1 hour ago, Sophie ♥ said: "Hey. I just wanna talk a minute before you go. Were at your house now, I just… how do you feel about Cho? I'm just wondering." Forgot an apostrophe. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 19, 2019 Author Share Posted June 19, 2019 10 hours ago, Wannatripbaby said: Grammar Patrol: Fixed! (My mistake this time, not Pudding's! ) Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 19, 2019 Author Share Posted June 19, 2019 /// I skipped school the next day; I spent the entire day in my room taking mushrooms and dreaming about the girl with the water hair. And on the day after that, I'd just slipped the first little disc into my mouth when there was a knock on the door. Another knock. And another. And they rumbled like drums through the corridors of my house. When I got to my feet and made it to the front door, Angel was standing there. I tried to focus on her, but the corona from the outside light splashing against her body made it hard to stay fixated on her dazzling form. "Oh hey Aaangeelll…" I grinned and kissed the girl's lips. "Uh… hi.” I frowned a little and looked the disheveled boy over. He clearly hadn't done much with his appearance since the day I dropped him off here two days ago. "What's going on… oh. You're on mushrooms. I see." I sighed and let myself into the house, closing the door and slipping my shoes off, setting my backpack on the floor. That's fine then. "Just taking some time to think, Angel…" It was hard to be lucid enough to form a coherent sentence when all I wanted to do was play with her hair, so I reached into my pocket and put another mushroom between my lips, kissing the girl and slipping it into her mouth with a little smile. "Come fly with me?" I took her hand and led her through the mess that was my house, then up the hall into my bedroom which couldn't have been more different - it was immaculately clean, well decorated and such a contrast from the rest of the house. I closed the door and laid down on the bed, smiling. "I missed you… but I'm a bad girl… leading the boys on… breaking hearts. I gotta be not such a slut, Angel…" I sighed and pulled the mushroom from my mouth looking at it. "I needed someone to talk to today. Everyone's so strict on this 'we don't talk about her' rule. I can't even go to Linds anymore. But I guess this is a good substitute. Didn't think of it…" So I slid the mushroom back under my tongue and waited for the effects to kick in, lying myself down on Star's bed. "You can… talk to me…" I winced and tried to focus, tried to break free of the colors and the fluid movement of everything around Anna. She needed me. She came to talk to me and it was going to be about Juliet… but I was so lost, and soon she was lost too. I lay on my bed while my Angel flew around me, her lips kissing mine over and over and I tried to focus on what was important. Somewhere among my ride, I managed to scrawl down the word "HER" on a notepad that I kept next to my bed. I didn't know if I'd know what I meant when I came down, but it was all I could manage. "You're so fucking beautiful, Anna… I wish you were mine. I wish you wanted me. I wish you and I could be." My words seemed so damn melodic as I spoke and her hair rippled with color like the surface of oil. It really was what I'd needed. We kissed a lot, Star and me, and somewhere along the way our clothes were removed. We didn't have sex or anything, but they felt very restricting. Everything felt better without them. So when I blinked my eyes open in the dreary room underneath the blankets with Star and me both naked, I didn't freak out. I had all the memories of what had happened. I rolled over to face him, my left arm above the covers and the marks visible in the pale light. He looked like he was asleep too. Maybe I should find my clothes… /// My eyes crept open and I smiled at Anna as she looked around the room from her place beneath my covers. I knew I was naked. I knew she was, too. But it was whatever. We might well have been family, or two friends on opposite ends of the sexuality scale. "That was pretty fun…" I pulled her arm over me and cuddled closely, though my eyes couldn't help but focus on the marks. I wanted to ask, I wanted to know, but she'd told me as much as she wanted to. So we lay and we cuddled and I didn't say much of anything until I caught sight of my notepad and picked it up off the bedside. "Her…?" I frowned and looked up at Anna, trying to figure out what it meant. "I leave this notepad here in case I need to remind myself of something while I'm flying…" I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't remember you writing it…" I pulled some of the blanket down between Star and me so our naked bodies weren't touching and cuddled up to his chest, closing my eyes. "Don't get too used to this, Twinkie-winkie." "Uhhuh…" I looked at the paper for a few more minutes before a flash of realization hit and I looked up at Anna. "You came here to talk about her. About Juliet. Nobody else would talk to you because they're too afraid to bend your rule…" My eyes went back down to the notepad and I thought about what remarkable penmanship I had for someone who believed he was writing with an elephant trunk. "My rule?" I blinked my eyes, looking up at the boy beneath me. "You think it's my rule not to talk about her?" I half-smiled and put my head back down on his chest but shook it softly. "Regardless. It's a rule for a reason. And we won't be talking about it now either. Plus, I don't need to. The mushrooms cleared my head." Ironic. "You know, for a while I felt special. Like you could talk to me about something you couldn't talk to Linds about." I tried not to sound too hurt by the rescinding of her offer, but it was hard not to be. Still. Whatever. It's just. Whatever. If she wants to talk about it, she will and that's good enough and nothing more. "Glad I could help, anyway. Sorry I been off the map for a few days. Just had a lot to think about myself and I don't do so well at facing my issues. Running's easier. Or flying through the rings of Venus on an octopus." "Yeah… I understand what you mean." I sighed and climbed out of bed, doing my best to cover my naked body with the bedsheets. It felt weird being naked around him knowing we hadn't done anything… I slid my bra on first and then my panties. I was less self-conscious after that and walked across the room to grab my jeans, then my shirt from the bedside table. Still had to find my jacket though… "You gonna tell me why you hurt yourself, Anna?" I hadn't gotten up, I was still naked beneath the covers and I rolled over to look at the wall away from the girl as she got dressed, "We all have our demons, but part of you wants to share yours with me. I don't have many of my own, so maybe I've got the room to spare. Who can say?" I put on a small smile and looked at my arm. There were eight quarter-inch wide burns in strips about an inch in length going up my arms. They were parallel in pairs. Two, two, two, two. I sat down on the bed, having not found my jacket, and fingered each of the marks. They were very severe burns… "Can't talk about it…" But I repeated it more like a line in a book than one I firmly believed in. "You can talk about anything you want, as long as you trust who you're talking to. Figure if you can trust me not to take advantage of you when we trip, or not to get too attached to you when we make out, there's a pretty good precedent to trust me with your demons." I made a note to make sure it was the last bit of convincing I did for today; if she didn't bite then she didn't bite and she wouldn't need to talk to me. It was really as simple as that. I'd offered, I'd done what a good friend should - despite the fact I felt like anything but a good friend after the shit that went down with Cho. Honestly, that kid was chiefly the reason I was avoiding school. "Rules are rules for a reason, Twinkle." I pulled the jacket up out from under the bed in a moment of recollected memory and slid it over my arms, zipping it up half-way. Then I found my place back on Star's bed, looking with him at the ceiling. I should go soon. My parents were going to be pissed. "Who's rules, Anna? Because they're not your rules. And you never struck me as the rule-following type. You skip school, you smoke, you drive above the speed limit, you do mushrooms when your parents aren't home and you coerce school friends to skip studying to go on afternoon dates. Why this rule? Why now? Who's rule is it…?" Well. So much for my being content to leave things be. "Everyone's rule." I looked at the ceiling with a small pout, closing my eyes shortly after. "They think it's best. And it's been working. Why should I complain? I'm putting everyone out enough already. If they can fix things just by blacklisting her…" I quickly got up out of the bed and forced a small smile. "It's late, Twinkle. I gotta go." "I'm not everyone else. I think gay porn is hot, but I like girls. I paint one nail on my hands. Just one. I live in a run down house but keep my bedroom clinically clean. I love poetry but think math is sexier. I know more about women's shoes than any guy should have the right to, and I don't care if my one real friend wants to unload her entire past, present, and future on me. I'm not everyone else. If they shut you out, that's their loss. But I didn't. So just remember that. Remember that I'm different." I got up out of bed and looked around for some underpants so I could walk Anna to the front door. I left before Star could chase me out of the house. That was a mistake, Anna. You shouldn't be saying things like that. You shouldn't be talking about her or things could get bad again. Is that really what you want? But I stopped halfway to my car, turning back to the house. That boy really did care… I just wish he could understand… /// I managed to get to the front door before she got in her car, but I didn't go any further than that. I stood there in my jeans and nothing else, smiling as she stared back at me. I didn't say anything, though. She wanted to go. She wanted me to drop the topic. So I said nothing. I just stood there, and I smiled, and I waved as she opened the drivers side door. Nobody should have to carry the weight that girl carried. I just wished she'd share it. I could hear my siblings in the living room crooning about the girl I'd had over, and my parents were nowhere to be found as usual. But in that moment, the doorway was my world. It was such a stupid thing to do, but I closed my car door and walked briskly back up to the porch and grabbed Star's face with both my hands and kissed him hard. I was trembling by the time I pulled away, shaking my head over and over. "No questions, okay? No anything… just let us be us for a while… okay…?" It had been the last thing I'd expected; she'd come down from the trip and we'd talked and that was that and the topic was done. The weight was hers alone to carry. And yet she hadn't walked away… she'd come back. The short girl looked tortured as her glossed lips pulled away from mine and her directions were plain and simple. Concise. So very like her - so very like the day we'd first met. I pulled her into my arms and ushered her back into the house, but by the time we were in my bedroom, Anna was trembling. "Hey Angel, it's alright. Hey…" I sat her down on my bed and pulled my comforter up over her shoulders, wrapping it around the lithe girls body. I pulled Star down onto his bed with me, covering us both up and kissing him over and over while my fingertips danced up his side. I shouldn't be doing this… I knew I shouldn't. But I didn't stop. "Star, I…" I shook my head and kissed him again. Fuck all this thinking. It was like an encore to the feelings we'd shared as our broken minds had come into sync during our most recent trip; the haze still tugged at the edges of my mind but compared to the rainbows we'd wrapped one another in while flying, I was lucid as a priest. Her hands danced up my sides and I realized what it was to know Anna's affections without any other influence. My own hands found soft skin beneath her top, my nails raked softly and I could feel my own cheeks matching the heat that emanated from Anna's entire form. "I understand why patience is a virtue now…" I pulled my top off over my head and tossed it off Star's bed. Kissing went on quite the same, though. I still had a bra on so there was little adventure for him and, well, boys didn't have much going on in this area. I finally paused though - the thoughts I'd been running from finally catching up to me. I rested my head on Star's chest and closed my eyes. "Hey, doll… I gotta know something. The way I am, like this… when we kiss and stuff. Do you like this part of me? Do you like it more than when we talk at lunchtime?" I knew it would seem like such an arbitrary question to him, but I could explain. I just needed an answer. The words flowed easily from my lips as her words reverberated through my chest. "At school, at lunch time, around everybody else? You put up a facade." I considered my choice of wording, then continued. "We all do. You know me, I make light of my shitty home-life and obsess over my parents. But that's only the mask. Only because I have an an image to uphold. But when I have you alone this way, Angel… it's different. When it's just us, we both just relax and let things flow. The way things flow when we do mushrooms together." I guessed it hadn't really been much to answer her question, but I couldn't be much more detailed. I smiled a little to myself and kissed his bare chest once before resting my head on it again. A facade, huh? "And which would you prefer - to do mushrooms with me or share cookies with me?” No facade there. No friends. Those two things were always just us. It was another easy answer, though the question had seemed so very arbitrary. "Mushrooms." I thought maybe that would be enough of an answer, but immediately volunteered more. "You just seem so fluid, so spirited when we're doing mushrooms. I love that. I've never done them with anybody else and I get why my Mom and Dad only do them with each other." "There are a lot of things I don't like about myself, doll. A lot. And I was just wondering how many of your thoughts matched up with mine." I crawled up on top of the boy beneath me and kissed his lips again. "You got a perfect score, if you were curious." I kissed him again and cut the event short, closing my eyes and collecting my thoughts. "But there's… something else I want to ask, okay? And if you say no, that's an acceptable response. But I want to know if you love me or not." It wasn't a word I'd figured I'd be using this early in life - those people who said it with every boyfriend and girlfriend in grade school just made those three words mean so much less. Like when you suck away the sour on a Warhead - the candy is still there and likewise the word is, too. But what made it special is gone. I didn't want my special candy to be ordinary. She was waiting for an answer and I didn't have a yes or no. So I did what I always do… I babbled. "If love is feeling your chest tighten a bit when someone walks by. If it's longing for them to be there whenever you look at the sky. If day dreaming about the future with that person makes you smile and you trust them with everything when you reflect on the past. If love is wishing everything else would go away so you can just fly with that one person…?" I thought for a moment and looked up into Anna's eyes. "I don't know what love is. Not like in books. But I do know what that is. And I feel that with you. Is that love, Angel?" I sighed with a small smile and opened my eyes. "One of the things I simply adore about you, Star, is the way you can make a very simple question into something incredibly complicated." I leaned in and gave the boy another kiss before grabbing his hand in mine and running it up my bare stomach. "But I accept your round-a-bout answer nonetheless." I kissed him again, and after that there wasn't much talking. My bra was only on long enough for an unskilled high school boy to unhook it. My jeans were on only as long as it took the same unskilled boy to determine it was what I wanted. And by the end of our awkward dance - and when I say awkward, I meant for him as I would sit there and laugh to myself whenever he thought he was doing something wrong - we were both stripped of all our clothes. But our kisses were only more passionate, despite the passing of time. I felt like a preschooler suddenly given access to every crayon color in the known universe after having been limited to the same five-color pack of crayons for my entire life. Everything was new. Everything was bright. These moments had within them the same sensation of flying above my dreary life that getting high did, only there was nothing hallucinated now. Everything was real. We lay naked in each others embrace and fingers ran up my back while I mirrored the same, my lips kissed hers and I could feel myself pressing against her thigh. My mind raced with fears and worries; what if she didn't want me? What if I accidentally strayed too close and started a chain reaction. What if all she wanted was naked cuddles and not sex? Fuck it. Fuck all of those stupid thoughts. "I'm not so sure what I'm doing, Angel. But for you I'd do it forever." It was my first time too. Luckily, though, both Star and myself were well versed enough in pornography to understand the basics. He was also a smart enough boy to own condoms, despite his lack of sex life. It was awkward at first - this time for both of us because his tendency to slip out of my body was a little obnoxious - but fuck, when things actually started… /// “You… have siblings here… and we… made… lots of noise…" I wasn't moving for a while - I was sure of that. I was on my back now, Star beside me. My hands laced together with his. So that’s sex… With a sly little smile spread across my lips, I shrugged my shoulders and considered Sunray and Moonbeam. "They probably thought this is what we were doing earlier. You're pretty noisy when we're on mushrooms, though it's like a latin choir: lots of noise but nobody has any idea what's being said." My witty comments were really only because I couldn't think of any way to express what had just happened. It had seemed so weird, so awkward, so cumbersome and then… everything just worked. Everything felt fluid. Like we were flying. My arm laced around the girl's shoulder and I pulled her to cuddle against my chest, her own sweat-slicked skin sticking to my mine. Sex was better than any words could try to explain. Or maybe it was just sex with Anna. My Anna. I laid there for a long time. It was dark out when I left earlier. Fuck, Chloe might've already sent out a search party. I knew I had to get home. I knew this had to end. And I knew I had to be the one to make it. I finally sat up on my elbows and dressed myself in complete silence. I had something to say, but I didn't want the awkward wait after I'd said it. I wanted to just leave. So when I finally put all my clothes on I turned back to the naked boy on the bed with a sincere, sorrowful smile. "Star… tonight was for us, okay? I need you to never talk about it again. Ever. It's just for us. And it might never happen again. So treasure it, alright?" Girls in books would often talk about the way a boy changes after sex - that his priorities altered in a heartbeat and everything that seemed so important to him no longer meant a thing. Anna proved in that moment that the phenomenon wasn't limited to those in possession of a penis. But I forced a smile and pulled my pajama pants up, walking with Anna to the front door of our house. Standing there without my top on was a strange sense of deja vu; that I'd been here before. I wanted to reach out and kiss her. Wanted to tell her that maybe I knew now the answer to her earlier question. But I didn't do any of that. "See you tomorrow, Angel." 4 Link to comment
Wannatripbaby Posted June 19, 2019 Share Posted June 19, 2019 Oh my! That was... wow. ? If I do have one complaint it's that this chapter felt a little too dense if that makes sense? Like, we got some HUGE revelations about Anna's issues and the "Rule" about Juliet, but all that was totally eclipsed by the sex scene. Like maybe this should've been 2 separate chapters? Although I don't quite know where you could've split it. Buuuuuuuut you and Pudding are the experts here, not me. ? Grammar patrol: 7 hours ago, Sophie ♥ said: . "Oh hey Aaangeelll…" I grinned and kissed the girls lips. Forgot an apostrophe again. Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 19, 2019 Author Share Posted June 19, 2019 2 hours ago, Wannatripbaby said: Grammar patrol: Fixed! 2 hours ago, Wannatripbaby said: If I do have one complaint it's that this chapter felt a little too dense if that makes sense? Like, we got some HUGE revelations about Anna's issues and the "Rule" about Juliet, but all that was totally eclipsed by the sex scene. Like maybe this should've been 2 separate chapters? Although I don't quite know where you could've split it. It's funny, because the sex scene was almost an afterthought when we were writing it! I actually wonder if you'll feel this way by the end of the story... please be sure to come back and re-address this train of thought. Funnily enough, we're almost done with this story. Two chapters left, I think. Thanks for sticking with us! Link to comment
Wannatripbaby Posted June 19, 2019 Share Posted June 19, 2019 1 hour ago, Sophie ♥ said: Funnily enough, we're almost done with this story. Two chapters left, I think. Thanks for sticking with us! ONLY TWO CHAPTERS!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ???? Link to comment
Lizzy Posted June 20, 2019 Share Posted June 20, 2019 All good things must come to an end but this has been a fun ride, Looking forward to seeing how it ends ? Link to comment
mahleedl Posted June 20, 2019 Share Posted June 20, 2019 I am SO glad you decided to post this. Anna & Star are both awesome characters, and that last chapter... damn Link to comment
Sophie ♥ Posted June 20, 2019 Author Share Posted June 20, 2019 Thank you all for reading and commenting! Honestly, I can't tell you what it means to me. Some trivia! This story was actually written in one day. Pudding and I were in Melbourne together for the weekend - visiting her aunt - and I wasn't feeling well. So I stayed in bed, in the spare room, and Pudding was laying on the floor next to me. And we wrote the whole story in a single 12 hour sitting. When we were done, we walked down to the corner to buy ice cream together. I'll start Ch. 5 later today. Link to comment
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