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So, I've been very into wearing and wetting diapers for some time now. And when I'm wearing, especially when I wet, I'm in heaven, love the lifestyle, and want to do it more often. But as soon as the diaper comes off and I'm back to going without, I feel very insecure and borderline scared of ever doing it again. Does anyone else feel this way? Is there someone out there willing to chat with me about this, because I'm struggling for answers and am becoming desperate to understanding this side of myself.

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1 hour ago, DiaperedGamer said:

So, I've been very into wearing and wetting diapers for some time now. And when I'm wearing, especially when I wet, I'm in heaven, love the lifestyle, and want to do it more often. But as soon as the diaper comes off and I'm back to going without, I feel very insecure and borderline scared of ever doing it again. Does anyone else feel this way? Is there someone out there willing to chat with me about this, because I'm struggling for answers and am becoming desperate to understanding this side of myself.

Having desires to wear diapers can be very complicated.  Your mind tells you to put a diaper on because it makes you feel happy but then the same mind will tell you to take your diaper off because you feel ashamed.  I personally gained self acceptance by standing in front of a full length mirror in nothing but a diaper.  I forced my mind to see myself diapered until my mind decided the image staring back at me was accepted.  To this day I will often stand in front of a mirror diapered with a big smile on my face.

To break down your fears and insecurities about wearing diapers you need to ask yourself why do I have these feelings.  Are you ashamed of yourself?  Do you feel weird or awkward?  Sometimes there is not a logical reason, you just do.  Now ask yourself why do you want to wear diapers.  For most of us they make us happy.  It could be physically, mentally, or sexually.  For me I decided that I wanted to be happy.  Diapers make me happy, make me feel good, why deny that by allowing my mind to think that these feelings are not normal or wierd.  I convinced myself that being diapered is me, the normal me, who I am.

Unfortunately it is very hard to give advice on this as we all are so different in how we feel.  You should know that you are not alone with these feelings as almost everyone of us at some point or another has felt this way.

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Wearing a diaper creates positive energy that makes you feel great. The moment you take your diaper off you can lose that energy and that can leave you feeling scared or insecure. 
Only understanding and accepting this shift of energy can help you feel better after wearing a diaper.

Good luck 

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I struggled with the feelings of shame when I was a kid. At fifteen, I tried to tell myself that I had a problem. Well....I don't have a problem. I like diapers. I like wetting them. As a matter of fact, I'm wearing a wet diaper as I write this. It may take time for you to accept yourself as a diaper lover. Give it time. Be gentle with yourself.

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On 4/14/2019 at 10:09 AM, DiaperedGamer said:

So, I've been very into wearing and wetting diapers for some time now. And when I'm wearing, especially when I wet, I'm in heaven, love the lifestyle, and want to do it more often. But as soon as the diaper comes off and I'm back to going without, I feel very insecure and borderline scared of ever doing it again. Does anyone else feel this way? Is there someone out there willing to chat with me about this, because I'm struggling for answers and am becoming desperate to understanding this side of myself.

Yes and have purged many times before. But soon binge again, a partner would help ALOT because it's not just sexual but a comfort thing too. But not had one in over 10 years time.

Before purging I felt like I was fucked in the head and wanted to try being 'normal'. But then I'm far from normal as I'm still very into looking alternative/emo, and still pass as/look like someone in their 20's, not 35. 

And I'm into many other weird fetishes like pup play. ABDL is my main one.

Nothing wrong with being weird, normal is boring.

I accept it more nowadays, as I'm quite messed up anyway with very severe anxiety,depression, PTSD, NEAD(dissoactive seizures). And other health issues.

 

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On ‎4‎/‎14‎/‎2019 at 10:09 AM, DiaperedGamer said:

So, I've been very into wearing and wetting diapers for some time now. And when I'm wearing, especially when I wet, I'm in heaven, love the lifestyle, and want to do it more often. But as soon as the diaper comes off and I'm back to going without, I feel very insecure and borderline scared of ever doing it again. Does anyone else feel this way? Is there someone out there willing to chat with me about this, because I'm struggling for answers and am becoming desperate to understanding this side of myself.

Perhaps ease yourself into the lifestyle a little more slowly?, maybe have a diaper day once a week so you have it to look forward to,,,

I only discovered the joys of wearing in my 50s and took to it like a duck to water, within two weeks I was, and remain, 24/7,,,

I guess at 23 you are probably sharing accommodation with relatives or housemates, which would perhaps make you self-conscious about the whole thing, and perhaps unable to wear openly, this would cause me some anxiety even though I'm at the age where I don't care what people think about my lifestyle choices,,, 

 

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2 hours ago, Evelyn Dellcerro said:

I have gone shopping, driving, and to movies to enjoy a wet and messy diaper. The thrill of getting up when the credits roll on a movie and filling my diaper with a well deserved hot poop. The love of being behind the steering wheel knowing that my diaper is loaded and all I can do is enjoy it and get home. Standing on a line at the market and pooping my diaper while I am having a conversation with a woman holding a baby. The irony that it is. Here I am a fifty four year old woman filling her diaper and loving every minute. That includes clean up !!!

 

5 hours ago, diaperfag said:

Hi! Newbie into diapers, from the UK. In a sub/Dom relationship and recently put into diapers. 

Hoping to learn and make friends. Thanks!

 

It would me great to.make friends, how are you, this evening ?  ?

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On 4/14/2019 at 7:25 AM, MarkSmith said:

Having desires to wear diapers can be very complicated.  Your mind tells you to put a diaper on because it makes you feel happy but then the same mind will tell you to take your diaper off because you feel ashamed.  I personally gained self acceptance by standing in front of a full length mirror in nothing but a diaper.  I forced my mind to see myself diapered until my mind decided the image staring back at me was accepted.  To this day I will often stand in front of a mirror diapered with a big smile on my face.

To break down your fears and insecurities about wearing diapers you need to ask yourself why do I have these feelings.  Are you ashamed of yourself?  Do you feel weird or awkward?  Sometimes there is not a logical reason, you just do.  Now ask yourself why do you want to wear diapers.  For most of us they make us happy.  It could be physically, mentally, or sexually.  For me I decided that I wanted to be happy.  Diapers make me happy, make me feel good, why deny that by allowing my mind to think that these feelings are not normal or wierd.  I convinced myself that being diapered is me, the normal me, who I am.

Unfortunately it is very hard to give advice on this as we all are so different in how we feel.  You should know that you are not alone with these feelings as almost everyone of us at some point or another has felt this way.

OMG Mark,what you said about standing in front of a mirrow is something I have been doing for over 45 years.I still do today.

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Thank you all so much. Slowly hut surely, I'm learning to accept these desires as part of who I am, but I won't lie, it's been difficult. I really enjoy this side of myself, but have found it difficult to accept it in those times I can't wear, due to being around people. I've had the opportunity to do it again now, and have accepted myself in this state, as I'm wet and very happy. Even in a mirror, I've found happiness and comfort. So thank you for the great advice, continue being awesome and supportive! 

3 hours ago, Evelyn Dellcerro said:

 

It would be great to get to know y'all! How are you guys doing? Feel free to drop me a message, and I'll be sure to get back to you all as soon as I can! 

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How long have you been wearing?

All I can say is, the more you do it, the less doing it again feels intimidating. Swallow down those negative feelings, take the plunge, and enjoy it. It gets easier every time.

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I would just be mindful of the "binge-purge" scenario. You like what you like and that's okay. Once you're okay with it, find a happy medium and go with it. When I was younger and first into diapers I used to do the same....wear, enjoy it and then say "Oh no, this isn't okay" and get rid of them only to go back and do it all again. Now I just wear a few times a week, I know its okay and I love it! Best wishes on your journey!

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Just relax. Wearing nappies is a personal choice. Who says it is wrong. Wearing nappies does no one any harm and brings a lot of pleasure. I have to wear them as I am urinary incontinent, but I thoroughly enjoy them and couldn't imagine not being in nappies now.

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(I spent 20 minutes looking for this). This is from a blog I follow on tumblr(Resonantyes) and is honestly what helped me break my hatred and guilt of enjoying diapers. It's a long post, but I hope it helps you like it helped me.

"

Releasing ABDL Shame

I recently got a private message on Fetlife from a new guy-friend who, like me and so many others have, is struggling with the guilt and shame of having ABDL interests, particularly in light of his outward masculinity.  I thought I would repost my advice here in case it can be of any help to our Tumblr friends… while we aren’t by any means experts on shame or self-care, I thought perhaps my thoughts could help others.

For me, there have been a couple of core concepts that have helped me release that shame and guilt. I’ll share them here in full knowledge that these aren’t the kinds of things that seep in overnight: it took me a couple of years to deeply internalize them, and even today I have to remind myself at times that I lose self-compassion or feel threatened. So, be kind to yourself… this kind of self-integration is a process, and by reaching out to others you have started it brilliantly. Kudos for your bravery!

Everyone is masculine and feminine.

Seriously, we all contain both of these energies and their requisite traits in spades. Our culture tells us a lot about how we should feel, how each gender should act, etc., but most of it is polarized nonsense for the sake of quick characterization. (One researcher refers to it as a “social role heuristic,” basically a shortcut to understand where we fit in the pecking order). For a couple hundred millennia, males have been depended upon to be bigger, physically stronger, hunt, etc., and females have been depended upon to bear and nurse children, gather provisions, nurture community support, etc., and our cultural standards have developed around these necessities. Unfortunately, we have also lumped a whole lot of psychological concepts into these functional realities as our societies have gotten more complex and our ability to abstract has improved. So big/strong/independent has turned into a role and bear/gather/nurture has turned into a role which eventually turned into a set of beliefs which eventually turned into our concept of gender.

All that to say, you are both. You are strong and independent and tough and assertive. You are also soft, open, in need of love, tender, small, and weak. Both are true, and neither requires the other to go away in order for itself to exist. As Walt Whitman famously wrote, “I am large. I contain multitudes.” I go to work, I make command decisions, sometimes I guide millions of dollars and hundreds of jobs with my choices… and when I come sometimes I want to get diapered and taken care of, and both are equally awesome. Neither requires the other one to go away in order to be true. You need to be taken care of, just like everybody else, and don’t let the business suit or power play trick you into thinking you need to polarize. You don’t. Go kick ass during the day, come home and Little-out at night. Or vice versa. You are contain multitudes.

You are not broken.

Man, this is the crux of it. Sexuality is impossibly complex, and it exists at such a fundamental level in our brain development and evolution… it pre-dates conscious thought, and our conceptualizations of our sexuality are merely best-guesses at trying to characterize something wholly abstract and base-functioning.

To think of sexualities, regardless of how culturally deviant, as being character flaws or mistakes is to miss how sexuality works. If you don’t believe me, look at the NIH-funded studies that demonstrated how easy it is to create a lemon fetish in rats. Are these rats morally corrupt? Are they broken? Are they perverts? Are they broken? Nope… their sexual development happened to overlap with a sensory stimulus and they ended up with a fetish. Awesome. Anybody got any guesses on why men are attracted breasts? Yup. Because that’s how that works.

There is nothing wrong with you. There never was. Your sexuality may be different than most people you know, but it’s not broken.  There is no normal sexuality, and I guarantee that you are surrounded by dozens of men and women at work who have sexual fetishes, bizarre interests, turn-ons and practices that they work hard to hide from the world.

You deserve to try to be happy.

The pursuit of happiness is, as the US Declaration of Independence so eloquently puts it, an inalienable right. I think it’s an inherent trait; a motivational force built into each of us in some degree that drives behavior. So goddamnit, if something makes you happy and you can do it without violating others’ right to their pursuit of happiness, go after it. Few things make me as happy as diapering my wife, and few things make me feel as loved as being diapered. So I’m going to do it a lot; it’s fantastic. If I’m not doing it enough, I’m going to create time, and if I find I’m doing it too much, I’ll back it off, as it isn’t actually making me happy. Your pursuit of something that makes you happy isn’t just nice, it’s essential to embracing your own beautiful humanity. So fucking run after it; find your thing, and do it a lot. If your partner isn’t game, that’s OK… he/she doesn’t have to be, and he/she has a right to pursue happiness too, and you guys can work out how that will work for you. Pursuing happiness is part of valuing your own humanity; if you would want it for a friend, you can want it for yourself.

Let shame teach you, then let it go.

Shame and fear researcher Brenè Brown says it better than I ever could in her TED talk on shame:

“In surviving this last year, I was reminded of a cardinal rule — not a research rule, but a moral imperative from my upbringing — “you’ve got to dance with the one who brung ya”. And I did not learn about vulnerability and courage and creativity and innovation from studying vulnerability. I learned about these things from studying shame. And so I want to walk you in to shame. Jungian analysts call shame the swampland of the soul. And we’re going to walk in. And the purpose is not to walk in and construct a home and live there. It is to put on some galoshes — and walk through and find our way around.”

It’s OK to feel it.  It’s OK really dislike that feeling, too.  But let it teach you; let it tell you about your beliefs and your contradictions without judging yourself for feeling those things.  Then, when you’re ready, choose to begin to step out of it.  Avoiding shame (like avoiding any feeling) just compresses it into a more potent version of itself, and it comes out in dark and unpredictable ways.  Don’t try *not* to be shameful, but rather ask what it teaches you about yourself, then choose to replace shame with compassion as you walk out of the swamp.

 

I hope this is helpful, and I’m really glad you reached out; that moment of vulnerability is a moment of profound creative and renewing energy."

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I completely agree about the pursuit of happiness.  Do not live life in misery because you are told by your significant other or society in general that you cannot wear diapers.  It is not fair to you or those who are around you.  Love finds a way to accept diapers and if not were you ever really truly loved.  As my wife said, for better or worse.

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  • 1 year later...

I found the re-post of Bgoalie95 above to be one of the better pieces on the subject.  I also found the following on the ABDL reddit, and thought to share here; I think user Baby-Faye-Rose did a very good job describing.

 
Posted by 5 days ago
 
 

Managing Embarrasment

 
 
nsfw

Do any of you get embarrassed about your little side even around people that are ok with it? My bf knows I'm abdl, and while he's vanilla he does still help me pick out onesies and diapers and stuff, I know he's ok with it but sometimes, randomly when I'm all littled up with my onesie and thick diaper with a paci holding my stuffie I'll get really embarrassed out of nowhere and wind up shutting down. It's like a different version of me looks at me when I'm little and mocks me about it. Does anyone else here experience something similar?

 
 
 
 
 
 
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level 1
6 points · 5 days ago
 

I think you may be projecting some expectation of societal norms onto yourself. Like "Ok most people don't do this. Maybe this is just wrong or degenerate in some way. Maybe I shouldn't be doing this. Oh gosh! He's judging me!" Or you may be wondering if deep down, does he REALLY accept this, or does he just tolerate it.
Well one thing would be to talk to him about it. Let him know what littlespace does for you, and ask him to be honest about his own feelings about you being in littlespace. If he's helping you pick out diapers and onesies, he's seemingly supportive. So I don't think he's bothered by it or is judging you. And as far as societal norms go, What is "Normal" anyways? Everybody has some quirk that someone else is going to find strange. Human beings are not cookie-cutter creations, and we should never try to be so. We all have fetishes, interests and other proclivities that make us unique. Without them, we are just the same, and "same" is BORING!
Just let me tell you this, There is not a damn thing wrong with what you are doing! Wearing diapers is AMAZING! Being able to regress and just let go of the adult stresses and worries and just cuddle up with a nice cushy-tushy and a stuffie while wearing a cute onesie is a rare ability. If more people could learn how to just regress once in a while, this world would be far less stressful and more colorful and cheerful. Just because our bodies age, and our minds become more developed and we learn how to "adult", that does not mean we have to stop playing. pretending, wondering, and it certainly doesn't mean that we have to lose that childish innocence and sense of wonder and freedom that regression and ageplay brings to so many of us.

Stay wonderful. Stay happy. Stay you. You are beautiful.

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I know this is old, but I don't think what you are describing is odd at all. I've felt the same thing often. For me the kink is often tied to embarrassment, which in the right mindset I can like, but can also ruin the feeling. The sharp and sudden drop you experience happens, I've even included it in my stories.

I think what's important to remember in those situations is that there is nothing wrong with what you are doing. You are expressing yourself in a way that works for you and you aren't hurting anyone. The only person who knows is your partner, who, from your description, seems to be alright with it. Far too often we have the tendency to overthink things and come up with worse case scenarios in our head, just relax, be smart about it, and remind yourself its ok.

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