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Telling a friend?


Jbo

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I have a friend who can pickup any girl he wants and the girls are always good looking, well a few days ago he told me about this girl who had him put a diaper on her so she could pee in it and I was thinking that this is hitting close to home. I was wondering if I should tell him about me being a ab/dL? I need some advice cause when I drink I get very open and to trustworthy with people. Thanx everyone!

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I have a friend who can pickup any girl he wants and the girls are always good looking, well a few days ago he told me about this girl who had him put a diaper on her so she could pee in it and I was thinking that this is hitting close to home. I was wondering if I should tell him about me being a ab/dL? I need some advice cause when I drink I get very open and to trustworthy with people. Thanx everyone!
Trick question have you maybe said a little to much in the past ,and he's tricking you to see if you will confess all and out yourself completely?the adage give someone enough rope,they will hang themselves? He's maybe dangling a rope !

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7 minutes ago, Cruiser 03 said:

Trick question have you maybe said a little to much in the past ,and he's tricking you to see if you will confess all and out yourself completely?the adage give someone enough rope,they will hang themselves? He's maybe dangling a rope !

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That’s a good observation cruiser! I never told him or gave him a hint about my lifestyle, but I will most certainly keep what you said in the back of my head!!! I was wondering that maybe this can work out for me cause he might know a girl who would fit my lifestyle. I’ve know him for a long time.  But again cruiser you have made a good observation, and the funny thing is that I’m a paranoid person and I’m surprised I didn’t think of that.

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3 hours ago, Jbo said:

I was wondering that maybe this can work out for me cause he might know a girl who would fit my lifestyle. I’ve know him for a long time. 

Just because your friend hooked up with a girl who may or may not be into diaper play doesn't necessarily mean that would be a good potential partner for you. There is sooooooo much more to a relationship, imo, than just one little thing be that thing diapers or something else.

Honestly, try going out and doing things you enjoy and find someone you have things in common with first. A lot of folks who have partners that are actively involved in diaper play found their partner through other interests first.

My wife, Daddy and I are in a committed, closed, poly relationship and neither my wife or Daddy were into diapers before we got together. It took explaining and yes being vulnerable but it was sooooooo worth it in the end.

Little Kaiya

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7 hours ago, Jbo said:

I have a friend who can pickup any girl he wants and the girls are always good looking, well a few days ago he told me about this girl who had him put a diaper on her so she could pee in it and I was thinking that this is hitting close to home. I was wondering if I should tell him about me being a ab/dL?

The classic conundrum, to open up to your friends or not. I have told only my best friend that I am ABDL, and I've dropped hints, but never outright said anything to another one of my friends. Before opening up to your friend, the first thing I would think about is what kind of relationship do you have with this friend? What does friendship center around? Is it a shared experience, activity, profession, or have known them for a long time? When you spend time together do you typically talk about your personal feelings or do you normally stick to other topics? Also, in what context did your friend view this experience with this girl he went out with? Was it a, "hey this unusual thing happened to me," or a "you wouldn't believe what happened last night." Was your friend's reaction to the event positive, negative, or neutral? Additionally, do you think that him knowing this about you would be beneficial to you or your relationship?

All of these "tests" will simply provide you with data that will allow you to get a lose prediction of what his reaction would be to you telling him you are ABDL. I'd say that if your friend's reaction was positive to his experience he'd had on his date, and you often share personal thoughts and feelings with each other then your good to go. I'd recommend listening to Episode #103 of the Dream A Little podcast. It's all about how to talk to friends about ABDL. Ultimately, only one thing matters here and that is if you want to tell your friend.

Three things ultimately drove me to open up to my best friend. First, bottling up my little side was causing a massive buildup of shame that was hurting me and I needed to get this off my chest. Second, we are very close and frequently share lots of details about our personal thoughts, opinions, and feelings without judgement, and with complete confidentiality. Third, I realized that my friend knew more about me than anyone else, so if I couldn't open up to her, then I wondered if I'd ever be able to open up to anyone. When I finally got up the nerve to tell her, I wrote everything down in a letter and handed it to her one night when while we were eating dinner in the dinning hall. When she read it she looked me straight in the eye and said, "So what? I don't see what the big deal here is. Clearly you feel a deep sense of shame about this and you are projecting that shame onto me. What did you expect me to do, say you are a horrible person and walk away? I don't care, you are not a serial killer." I can say that telling her has helped me a lot. As far as our friendship, it would probably be in the same place regardless of if I'd told her or not.

If you decide you want to tell your friend then I'll share the awesome advice that I heard on The Big Little Podcast: Remember, you don't have terminal diaper cancer. What this means is you will get the response from the other person based on the tone you set. If you set the tone of, "There's something really important and I'm nervous right now," you are less likely to get a good response then if you set a tone of, "so here is this little thing I like to do to relax in my free time."

Please feel free to DM me if you have any questions or would just like to chat,

Tomás

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I Understand your frustration but i wouldn't tell my friend

 

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I've been in a accident which l broke my hip an now dealing with mobility issues. When I was fresh home from hospital I had to breakdown and ask my bestfriend to get my diapers because I couldn't walk. The most terrifying thing ever this is someone I knowed all my life. They comfort me and assured me they weren't bothered an it's ok. Life has been better now it openly knowed. My position has changed to if you need too get it off your chest do it. Just know whatever happens dont let it the outcome control you it's your life an your not doing anything wrong.

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I haven't told anyone about being a DL and so far never had the desire to do so. Besides my wife, of course. 
And I personally wouldn't want to know any bed-preferences or sexual practices of others.
Once you told your friend, he may always think of you as a AB/DL person. 

My advice: don't tell him unless it's inevitable (when he finds diapers in your flat or simular things)

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unless your friend is open with his kinks and interests i wouldn't ask. its best if you find someone on your own. (IMO). your secret getting out is literally the worst thing ever, to be avoided at all costs.

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I say no.  Just because he told you about putting a diaper on a girl is no reason you should tell him that you also like to wear diapers.  You wearing diapers really has nothing to do with him putting diapers on a girl he picked up at her request. 

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1 hour ago, rusty pins said:

I say no.  Just because he told you about putting a diaper on a girl is no reason you should tell him that you also like to wear diapers.  You wearing diapers really has nothing to do with him putting diapers on a girl he picked up at her request. 

I second this. Outing yourself has nothing to do with his fling. You’re better off keeping it to yourself.

I do find it interesting that he had a girl asked to be diapered though. Not exactly something you see everyday out of the blue like that.

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I would say it all depends.  In my opinion I want my closest and dearest friends to love me for who I am.  I wear diapers permanently and my closest friends know that.  It was not something I shared with them immediately but something as time passed I wanted them to know.  Everyone close to me I have told I wear diapers love me the same today as they loved me before they knew I was padded.  I do have exceptions to telling friends.  My coworkers are off limits simply because I do not want work to know through my own doing.  Often times it would be much easier for my work friends to know because then it would be a lot easier to disappear to change my diaper without drawing attention to myself.

At the end of the day you have to decide what is best for you.  What are the potential consequences you face if you tell your buddy you are ABDL and can you live with those consequences.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Only you can judge whether telling him is good or bad. I personally have told all of my closest friends that I’m an adult baby and most of them have seen me in my diapers at one point or another because I was tired of not being myself and having to hide a very important part of myself. I am much more relaxed and comfortable with myself after having told my friends. 

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