Rift The husky Posted September 18, 2018 Share Posted September 18, 2018 I dont know what to do. Two days ago I was attacked by my step sister with a piece of wood. This all started because my step sister cleaned the bathroom room and said it will be my turn on next time I said ok thats fine and called a lyft so I could go to work and I was saying to myself why should I have to clean the bathroom when I have been the only one cleaning it for a year while she sits in her room playing videogames like she runs the place in my Dads house. She heard me venting out side while waiting on my ride to work and the next thing you know she is comes running out of the house with a piece of wood like she's going to hit me with it I extended my arm and started shouting get back repeatedly and she was still comming at me with itGod she didn't do it then I called my dad about the situation and all he said was deal with it. My Dad and my stepmother say that they treat all their kids equally but that is not the case because they have threatened to stab, shoot me and more if I try to defend myself from my stepsister. What am I supposed to do stand there and possibly get killed . I'm in fear for my life right now I didn't want to call the police because I feared that it would only make it worse. I'm just still venting off steam. Link to comment
Rift The husky Posted September 18, 2018 Author Share Posted September 18, 2018 39 minutes ago, horrorfan said: Move out. I do have plans to move to Australia so I can be far away from all the negativity and abusive environment Link to comment
horrorfan Posted September 18, 2018 Share Posted September 18, 2018 You don't even have to go that far away, just move to a different residence. If problems persist, then involving the police would be a good idea, otherwise you're potentially shooting yourself in the foot since anything you do would seem to have a direct impact on your living conditions. As I don't know your family's side of the story, the best recommendation I can give for now is keep the place clean, even if it's not your chore, and keep your interactions with them (to their faces and out loud to yourself) at a minimum. You know their buttons, so avoid pushing them. Link to comment
runtashea Posted September 18, 2018 Share Posted September 18, 2018 Just leave. If a friend is willing, ask if you can stay with them. No one needs to deal with this kind of crap. Link to comment
Rift The husky Posted October 2, 2018 Author Share Posted October 2, 2018 Sorry it took me this long to reply back to all of you . I plan on leaving my family behind and moving to Australia but I don't have any where to go while i'm waiting for the transition from Georgia to Australia and start a new life for myself the only thing that is standing in the way of me and Australia is money, passport and approval to enter into the U.k. Link to comment
Firefly 35 Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 On 10/2/2018 at 5:50 PM, Rift The husky said: Sorry it took me this long to reply back to all of you . I plan on leaving my family behind and moving to Australia but I don't have any where to go while i'm waiting for the transition from Georgia to Australia and start a new life for myself the only thing that is standing in the way of me and Australia is money, passport and approval to enter into the U.k. Have you thought about moving somewhere less far away? Moving to smewhere like Kansas or Iowa would be much less expensive, especially if you travel by bus. Also, if your family keeps threatening your safety, I would start audio recording them (subtley). Police officers and courts usually take that type of evidence very seriously. Just make sure to check the laws about audio recording where you live, since they can vary from place to place. Link to comment
ppdude Posted October 31, 2018 Share Posted October 31, 2018 Geez. Why are you still living at home? How old is you stepsister and why is she still there? AT your age, I'd been on my own for many years. On my 18th birthday, my father asked me where I was going to live and where I would work. College was an option too. I did all three. I think it's now in your court. Link to comment
Rift The husky Posted December 20, 2018 Author Share Posted December 20, 2018 Update I am now homeless and living out of my car because I called the police on my stepmother 4 days ago. Here's what happened I came home from work and my Dad and stepmother are hanging Christmas lights when I got there I said hello family there may be a possibility that I will be called back to work that I was going to try to get some sleep and when I came downstairs to go back to work that's when the confrontation started she said I can't believe you didn't help put up Christmas lights and nobody has the right to sleep when I outside putting the lights up. Because of all the past history between me and my family I packed my bags into my car and as Im gathering my things my stepmother starts throwing belongings all over the place and I have a right to protect my property from being destroyed and in the process of protecting my stuff my stepmother starts attacking me and chasing me around the front yard I yelled at her to get back and stay away repeatedly but she was still moving towards me then she tried to break my driver side window so when everything was all said and done I left and called the police. The police came out one to my location and another to the crime scene and took a statement from me and arrested her for assault now my dad wants me to drop the charges against her but I'm scared that if I drop the charges and she gets released what's to stop her from doing it again, 1 Link to comment
horrorfan Posted December 20, 2018 Share Posted December 20, 2018 Do you have any friends or coworkers you can stay with? You could probably also look for adds on craigslist for a roommate. 1 Link to comment
Rift The husky Posted December 20, 2018 Author Share Posted December 20, 2018 I don't have any friends who I can stay with. I will ask my coworkers if they will let me stay with them. Craigslist is a good idea why didn't I think of that. Thank you 1 Link to comment
horrorfan Posted December 20, 2018 Share Posted December 20, 2018 Just be careful with meeting new people online. I've heard some horror stories which involve craigslist. Link to comment
Rift The husky Posted December 20, 2018 Author Share Posted December 20, 2018 Will do Link to comment
Bettypooh Posted December 21, 2018 Share Posted December 21, 2018 Sorry to hear that things have come to a head so suddenly but I think you did the right thing. It sort of seemed inevitable from this end. Another short-term option might be a "Bed and Breakfast" for a night or two until something more permanent pans out. Some are cheaper than a hotel and at least you can get a hot shower and a real bed to sleep in with them. The "Extended Stay" type hotels are not often safe so I'd avoid them. Another option might be getting a spot at a campground but that usually requires you have a tent with in-car camping not allowed. Amenities and costs vary based n the place, but again you can usually find a shower there. At this time of year, State parks usually have open camping spots and are generally cheap, again varying on the location. If all that is more than you can afford you can get a hot shower at a a truck stop for a few bucks. For now I wouldn't drop the charges; as long as those are active you'll have decent legal protection and you can drop them later if you wish to. Or ask the prosecutor for leniency should you want that, which will leave the conviction but result in minimal effects. But honestly, if you don't have plans to leave the area really soon, I'd just let things stay as they are. She did wrong and she needs to know that, and the Courts might call for a mental evaluation which could lead to her getting help for free with that. But were it me I'd be making plans to scoot ASAP and to forget the place forever, even if that was just a town or two away. Maybe your employer has branches elsewhere and can arrange for a transfer. That would make it all work smoothly for you. For now things will feel and be a little rough, but see all this as the opportunity you always wanted to get way from the people who have been causing your problems, and take advantage of that opportunity to build your own life without them. None of us needs to have such negative people in our lives, and family only remains family when they care about you.I learned that lesson long ago as my Mom's family were about the sorriest and dirtiest and rotten people in the world, so the moment I could cut those ties I did. It proved to be a very good choice, and I didn't need them anyway. Other than my siblings and their kids, I have no family outside of my friends, and my friends have proven to care for me better than family anyway- now they ARE my family. Hoping things get sorted out well and quickly for you, and do let us all know how it's going.We do care here! Bettypooh Link to comment
Rift The husky Posted December 21, 2018 Author Share Posted December 21, 2018 Today my dad met me at waffle house to get my grandmother's Christmas gift and tells me that there is a court order saying that me and my stepmother can't be around each other and that there is a court date on the twenty third I don't know if it is of this month or the following month so I called the Cherokee county sheriff's office and the Cherokee county solicitors office and the Cherokee county district attorney office and non of them had any information other than my stepmother was arrested but my boss at the waffle house I work at is helping me to get through this thank goodness for that. Im really worried about this court thing because I don't want to go to jail for missing a court date not knowing when or where it is. It hurts having to live out of my car and even more having to figure out a way to get some information about the whole situation Link to comment
Bettypooh Posted December 22, 2018 Share Posted December 22, 2018 You need to contact the arresting officer who will know what the Court dates are as they have to appear at them. You should then contact the DA's office and find out the case number as well as if they are going to want you to appear and when. Make sure that whoever you speak to notes on the case paperwork that your temporary address is your workplace so that you receive any summons there; otherwise it will go to your address on file (where you left). The trial on the 23rd is probably a preliminary hearing where you won't be needed. It's basically just where the Courts determine whether a case is valid, considers any initial legal objections, then set a hearing date for the actual trial where you'll probably need to appear. The "no contact" rule applies to all cases but is mostly to ensure that the defendant does not interfere with the plaintiff (you) or try to coerce them. Just stay away from the house and you're fine. It usually takes a few days for the paperwork to get shuffled around between the involved agencies to coordinate things, so for now don't worry about anything. Just take steps to ensure that those agencies know how to contact you now and in the future should you gain a more permanent address. Any bills you may have gotten via mail will need to be dealt with differently until you get a new address set up. In the meantime I'm hoping you can find somewhere to stay PDQ because being essentially homeless sucks, and you've had too much crap thrown at you already to have that added to the list. Bettypooh Link to comment
Rift The husky Posted December 22, 2018 Author Share Posted December 22, 2018 I called the DA's office and all that with no luck they instructed me to call again in a week. About housing my boss is trying to raise some money to get a room for me for at least a week. I have a question if I make all the necessary phone calls about this court case and they still don't provide me any information will I go to jail if I miss the court date because I don't want to go to jail Link to comment
foreverdl Posted December 22, 2018 Share Posted December 22, 2018 Maybe you could have your father get a picture of the police report, I would think they left a copy at your home. the police report # should be enough to start the search through the court system. I grew up in broken homes, so I can relate. One of my stepmoms was eventually committed we never had fun holidays we were 10ish years old and calling the police on our stepmom, over and over. I really hope it goes well tomorrow at court. Keep us updated. Also if you still don't have the court time I would just go to the courthouse when the open, to start checking in someone there is bound to have a court time. Link to comment
Firefly 35 Posted December 23, 2018 Share Posted December 23, 2018 14 hours ago, Rift The husky said: I called the DA's office and all that with no luck they instructed me to call again in a week. About housing my boss is trying to raise some money to get a room for me for at least a week. I have a question if I make all the necessary phone calls about this court case and they still don't provide me any information will I go to jail if I miss the court date because I don't want to go to jail I don't think you would go to jail for that. From my understanding, it is usually the defendent (in this case your stepmother) who could be jailed for not showing up to court. Nevertheless, you should probably go to the police station in person to ask about the court date, if asking by phone isn't working. I hope all goes well! On 10/31/2018 at 2:56 PM, ppdude said: Geez. Why are you still living at home? How old is you stepsister and why is she still there? AT your age, I'd been on my own for many years. On my 18th birthday, my father asked me where I was going to live and where I would work. College was an option too. I did all three. I think it's now in your court. Can you please not be so rude? The economy has changed since the time you're describing and not everyone can move out at 18 any more. Also, RiftTheHusky does in fact have plans for moving out. Link to comment
horrorfan Posted December 23, 2018 Share Posted December 23, 2018 @Firefly 35 He actually posted two months ago, but I agree that this thread should focus on support rather than passing judgment. @Rift The husky I'm actually starting a job as a CNA soon. I have experience as a CNA, which I was hoping to not have to fall back on, but find myself in that arena once again (I don't have a current license though). The company I am signing on with is sponsoring my CNA training so I can get licensed. Maybe you could find something similar? It's full-time and if you don't mind the work you could always become a traveling CNA, which means that the company that rents you to facilities would pay for your room and board. The real catch though is you need excellent work ethic and/or people skills. Link to comment
Rift The husky Posted December 31, 2018 Author Share Posted December 31, 2018 On 12/23/2018 at 3:55 AM, horrorfan said: @Firefly 35 He actually posted two months ago, but I agree that this thread should focus on support rather than passing judgment. @Rift The husky I'm actually starting a job as a CNA soon. I have experience as a CNA, which I was hoping to not have to fall back on, but find myself in that arena once again (I don't have a current license though). The company I am signing on with is sponsoring my CNA training so I can get licensed. Maybe you could find something similar? It's full-time and if you don't mind the work you could always become a traveling CNA, which means that the company that rents you to facilities would pay for your room and board. The real catch though is you need excellent work ethic and/or people skills. Im sorry to hear that you're getting a job you don't want but if they are paying you while you train it's worth at least in my opinion but I don't know if I could be a CNA though its a great idea On 12/23/2018 at 10:57 AM, fuzzybunny said: I promise you if you dad says there is a real "case/ judgement" agaisnt the mother in law or who ever. He needs to give you the number. Most forms have numbers and can be looked up for you to get information. I would be looking for a secondary job to work at nights until you can save money. My suggestion is to buy a gun membership that has facilitates for showering and bathrooms. (And buy a cheap pair of shoes from wal mart for a dollar.) May not be perfect but most of them are only 10-20$ for a month and with it being the new year you might only pay nothing or no fees. Also buy a lock. It may not be pretty but it's better than showering in the sink. Getting a shower daily is a good thing and keeps you sane in a hard time. If you can make sure your car is in working order (for major repairs before getting a place to stay) once you do your commiting a lot of resources to where your staying. Then get a side job and hustle for extra jobs. Then sleep at nearby rest stops for extra security and always be near the cameras. Because your going to need extra money for a deposit and side jobs or a second part time job can pay for the deposit. Local library's are free and have free internet for you to look up for jobs and a place to relax Also try roommates.com. it's worth a shot and in your budget. You might have to hide your diaper side(etc for a bit) but it's worth it to get out of your car. Hope all works out for you. Also rice and beans budget for eating if you can. My dad says he has no paperwork on the court date and also says that he can't talk to me about it but if he doesn't give me any information on this and I miss court I fear that i will be in jail or mabe he is holding back the information so I will miss the court date when ever it is. My dad told me it is on the 23rd but has no papers to show for it. I think he lying to me so I am going to have to dig up that information myself. Link to comment
Rift The husky Posted December 31, 2018 Author Share Posted December 31, 2018 My job has been giving me some serious over time to try to help me get through this also I'm thinking about getting another job that pays equal or more than ten dollars per hour. If it is equal to what I am making now then I shall work 2 jobs but if it's more then I shall work the job that pays more. Link to comment
Firefly 35 Posted December 31, 2018 Share Posted December 31, 2018 14 hours ago, Rift The husky said: My job has been giving me some serious over time to try to help me get through this also I'm thinking about getting another job that pays equal or more than ten dollars per hour. If it is equal to what I am making now then I shall work 2 jobs but if it's more then I shall work the job that pays more. If you're good with people, I'd recommend a job as a resteraunt server, since they can make up to $12+ per hour when business is good. If you're an introvert like me, a re-stocking or cleaning job is probably good since the pace usually isn't terribly fast. In any case, do your research as some companies are more generous than others for the same type of job. Link to comment
Rift The husky Posted December 31, 2018 Author Share Posted December 31, 2018 58 minutes ago, Firefly 35 said: If you're good with people, I'd recommend a job as a resteraunt server, since they can make up to $12+ per hour when business is good. If you're an introvert like me, a re-stocking or cleaning job is probably good since the pace usually isn't terribly fast. In any case, do your research as some companies are more generous than others for the same type of job. Im currently working for waffle house in Woodstock Georgia as a grill operator making ten dollars per hour. I was thinking about getting a job working for either Disney or carnival cruise lines as a cook because of my waffle house experience as a grill operator and my second choice is to be a flight attendant. My third choice is to go military or become a police officer Link to comment
Bettypooh Posted January 1, 2019 Share Posted January 1, 2019 Pursue your dreams- that is really what life is all about You may not achieve all of them but if you do not try you never will. There's usually a lot of hard work and sacrifice involved in achieving your dreams and goals but it's all worth it in the end when you get what you always wanted. If you like the WH environment you might consider a path into management. It's a PITA job but if you're really good at it you might get up to being a District manager and then you're set for life after that. The same goes for any kind of job anywhere. It's usually our own self which limits how far our careers go but if you can tolerate what it takes to get where you want to be it's a dream fulfilled and worth going for Bettypooh 1 Link to comment
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