What is the link between our desire for diapers and our sexuality?

[Katie6963]

I read of many different reasons for wearing diapers. For me my desire for diapers is very much like my desire for sex. I can't have sex while wearing a diaper so why does putting one on cause such intense sexual desire? 

Tell me if and how your diaper and your libido connect.

[DLonly]

I'm really the same, like I get incredibly turned on when I wear diapers. But a gf and I tried diaper sex once and it wasn't really that much more intense than usually. Now she was doing it for me cause she was great that way, but she wasn't a DL or anything. I also believe I built it up in my head to be the greatest thing ever. But I find I enjoy them more when alone. That would change If I was in a relationship where we were both DL or Abdl I imagine. But then again maybe not.

[le Hollandais]

I've been married for almost 39 years. And in that time I have come to accept that people's need for sex differs; some have stronger, more frequent urges, some fewer, less intense. It's just the way it is. So when the urge overtakes me, and I can't satisfy myself, I diaper up, and masturbate.

Make no mistake, I love my wife dearly, and we are a devoted couple. It's just that I get the horny blues and diapers help.

Edited June 26, 2018 by le Hollandais
better grammar and spelling

[Katie6963]

13 minutes ago, DLonly said:

I'm really the same, like I get incredibly turned on when I wear diapers. But a gf and I tried diaper sex once and it wasn't really that much more intense than usually. Now she was doing it for me cause she was great that way, but she wasn't a DL or anything. I also believe I built it up in my head to be the greatest thing ever. But I find I enjoy them more when alone. That would change If I was in a relationship where we were both DL or Abdl I imagine. But then again maybe not.

I have had the same experience with a woman who would wear a diaper just to keep me company. The diapers didn't make the sex any better. They just got in the way. I wonder if I found a lover who loved diapers if it would be better or if diaper play and sex play would be different forms of play time?

[Bettypooh]

.Part of the "link" may be that as adults there is some sexual connotation with underwear. Another may be the different feel from the outside. More could be the fantasy or taboo factor.It would be interesting to understand the psychology behind this.

Most of us who wear 24/7 have discovered that whatever sexual factors there were have diminished or disappeared altogether in time. The general consensus seems to be that ' special is replaced by 'usual' after awhile, as it's nearly impossible to do the regular life functions if you're sexually excited. In this there could be more understanding if the person in question doesn't put a diaper on anytime they want to, making any of their wearing special, and therefore more excitng. We control or repress our sexual desires socially and many control or repress their wearing  of diapers, which might be another link. 

Diapers didn't have much of a sexual link with me, then again I have a low libido and am nearly asexual which would explain that. There's enough of it going for me to understand what others feel, but it's not always at the front of my mind like most people.My being nearly 60 might have something to do with this as well. Looking forward to seeing more discussion on this!

Bettypooh

[DiaperedAllTheTime]

My sexual libido is based almost entirely around my diapers.  In actuality making the decision to wear diapers permanently has definatly helped to control my sexual urges better.  Before when not padded full time I constantly thought about being in a diaper when not wearing one which would generally keep me in a constant state of sexual arousal.  I would aggravate my wife by begging her to send me humiliating sexts about me being diapered.  Once I put my diapers on and left them on that constant sexual need went away.  My requests to my wife went from everyday to once every few weeks.  It is as if wearing them permanently satisfies my need to be humiliated.  Everytime I move, walk, and talk to someone I am reminded by the feeling between my legs that I am diapered underneath my clothes which makes me feel happily pathetic.  Most of the time I am not just diapered either.  Pink diapers, with pink plastic panties, and a lacy diaper cover allows me to be a sissy baby girl underneath my clothes while pretending to be a real man on the outside.

Sexual relations with my wife are only while I am diapered.  Used diapers are a sexual turn off for my wife which I am unfortunately always in but the greatest sexual turn on for her is when I breastfeed.  So while being in diapers on one hand makes us sexually incompatible on the other hand it serves as our greatest pleasure.

My sexual releases are almost always made into my diapers through supervised masturbaion where my mess can be easily thrown away in the trash.  No stickies, no mess.  

My sex life is definatly not conventional but it revolves around diapers and it works for my wife and I.

 

[oznl]

Certainly in youth, there was significant conflation of diaper-wearing and sex.  It was a great turn-on (well more for me than her unfortunately) and much fun was had.

As middle aged arrived and my sexual drive faded, the desire to wear nappies remained and if anything, has gotten stronger: with (or more usually without) sex.

I’m sitting here now having changed out of my wet night nappy into a fresh, clean dry terry and I’m just doing my thing for work (with a quick glance at DD) – not at all interested in sex but perfectly comfortably diapered and spared the inconvenience of bathroom breaks for the day.  When I at last change back into grown-up underwear at the end of the day to avoid displeasing my partner by me being padded for a second consecutive evening, I will feel only regret and the burden of laundry. 

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

From what I know, no inherent one in most cases

Given that most of the time, this sets in WELL before puberty and the fact that at this time, the part of the brain that governs and implements sexuality is not even developed, that link cannot exist because that part of the brain will process how and what you feel

However there is something else. The organs involved are very nerve rich and very "feely" from at least late infancy/toddlerhood; VERY long before the sexual, and many other, parts of the brain is developed to the point of being up and running

Fruede recognized this. He had two phases (for the male, that being the most understood). the "phallic", about age 5 IIRC and the Genital, at puberty

Also, there is the endocrinology of it. Which hormones are being secreted at what age, which is related to that part of the brain

Because many of the physical feelings are the same, people think that there is some relationship between fetish and sexuality

This relates to a seemingly bizarre phenomenon. Many happily married persons will sometimes prefer masturbation to coitus, leaving their partner flummoxed and wondering how come she is inadequate, not realizing that this is far older than sexuality

That does not mean that there are not some aspects in place, but that tends to govern relationships. But these are based on personality variables. I had 3 girlfriends by the time I was in 3rd grade. The first and last of those were quite strong and in all cases it was the girl who initiated them by making it a point to be around me and treating me better than they treated others. It helped that I did nto chase them away. the first two ended due to moving to a different place or a different school. The loast one stood for 5 years 2nd to 7th grade. The girls involved in the first and last were also hihg-status. In the first she was almost as tall as I, blonde hair and blue eyes (status in these grades is how babyish you are NOT; no "baby fat", how tall you are, how crisp your movements are and how into the things going on you are. and even though I was one of the younger I was very tall, well-developed. got into thing right away, and outgoing; driven mostly by curiosity), the last was almost as tall as I, olive skinned with jet black hair and almost "dizzy" both in demeanor and movement; much like me and we were definitely "an item". However, the attraction was based on gender characteristics ("girl" or "boy" is based on appearance and behavior) rather than sexual and based on the fact that they paid attention to me and I responded in kind, not one of the usual "haters" (that came from the fact that when I was 4, I noticed that where I saw one, I saw the other, usually the same other so I figured I guess I better learn to like them; when I was 6, I saw the way boys and girls acted toward each other and I did not want any part of that because, knowing what I knew, I did not want to do anything that I would have to take back later. You have no idea of what having to take back something does to me inside. so there are relationships, but they are not sexuality based

[swampdonkey]

[emoji121]️ awesome response


When my girl wakes up from a wet diaper I gotta make a hole in it and grind like it’s nobody’s business [emoji12][emoji12][emoji12][emoji97][emoji97][emoji97]☂️[emoji98]


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[Evelyn Dellcerro]

I would say wearing diapers and my sex drive are one and the same. I went through an early puberty, I would say around eleven years old. Pooping my panties was a way to release that sexual urge. I masturbated for hours, and then I would clean up. When I graduated to diapers, it was heaven sent(scent). The diapers preserved the contents and kept everything fresh. I could go to my tree house and have the time of my life. Now over forty years later I have my house and I am widowed and have no worries in the world. My life revolves around the good times i have in my diapers.

[Stroller]

They're so closely connected, for me.  But they're separate things as well.  When i was younger and going through confusion about what all this was about, I wore only infrequently, and it coincided with masturbation a lot.  Once I started understanding this side of myself better, I started wearing a lot more, and that became more disconnected from sexual excitement.  Now I wear all day every day, and rarely get very sexually excited while padded - it's just normal life for me now.  Occasionally I'll look at some online porn, but usually I don't get physically aroused by that these days, and my cloth nappies are close-fitting making an erection difficult anyway.

I was never that comfortable with penetrative sex, and usually had to fantasise about AB things to make it work out properly.  These days, Mummy masturbates me when she thinks I need it, while I'm suckling on her, and that works best for me.  I don't initiate anything myself, other than rubbing against her in bed sometimes.  It seems to work best for her now, as she gets turned on by it and feels close to me.  I don't wear nappies in bed when Mummy's at home, as she's more comfortable with that. (I'm not, so maybe that will change as she gets more used to me in nappies.)

Our sex drive isn't what it was anyway, which makes thinks simpler and less frantic.  I'm in my 60s, and Mummy has gone through the menopause, and we're both less bothered these days.  I'm masturbated about weekly, and that's plenty for me.  The fact that Mummy wants to do it for me is as important to me as anything else.  We seem a lot closer now.

[BabyJune]

Speaking at least for myself, my interest in wearing diapers began long before puberty kicked in. I believe that for most people, loving diapers started before they had any sexual feeling as a result of wearing. It's more about reliving a childhood where everything is taken care of for you. Diapers provide a feeling of comfort and security that you can't get any other way as an adult in an adult world. Once puberty kicks in. it is obviously centered around the "diaper area" and creates a new kind of arousal from wearing diapers. And for guys, a wet dream is almost the equivalent of wetting your pants uncontrollably. That is the point I believe diaper-wearing becomes sexual because prior to puberty, sex is not an issue.

Oddly enough, people who claim to have had a bad childhood might use diapers as a way to heal and make up for some bad experiences while others who had a good childhood, strive to relive those pleasant feelings. (My childhood was really quite pleasant for the most part). So it can be either to fill in some missing blanks or to hang onto the more enjoyable aspects of your life.

[Stroller]

10 minutes ago, BabyJune said:

Speaking at least for myself, my interest in wearing diapers began long before puberty kicked in.

And for me too.  But when puberty did hit, it was closely connected to wanting to wear nappies.  From the start of puberty I was making pants out of plastic bags and wearing those to masturbate in.  Many years before I connected it with wearing makeshift nappies when I was much younger.

[Joep]

There’s correlation for me between sex drive and wearing diapers and many times CAUSATION (diapers turning me on). As with many fetishes our brains like to attach to something in the contextual moment of when our bodies started production of these lovely hormones. As mentioned earlier some of us this kicks in at an early age and overlapped with wearing diapers (not uncommon for 6 year olds to wear diapers to bed due to a small bladder and bed wetting. My brother did until he was 7!). And it makes sense that an article of clothing around our genitals (in this case diapers) would be something our brains connect to those hormones, especially when a wet diaper is soft and warm it feels good like a vagina and of course the male brain instinctively desires that sensation.

Another explanation is an attachment occurring due to childhood trauma, that attachment is made to the object or activity when the person feels safest. This was the case with me, but I like to think of it on the positive side. In light of trauma a very fun and stimulating part in my life was born and holy cow is it a fun fetish to have.

So that’s how I believe the diaper/libido connection is commonly made and when put into words doesn’t sound surprising or nearly as taboo even though the cultural taboo adds to the defiant pleasure some of us enjoy.


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[Nat]

I found sex to be very boring and I was always anxious to get it over with. Them my husband decided to change my diaper and have sex with me and I wasn't bored anymore. It wasn't that I was asexual and lacked interest in having sex, I just have a diaper fetish and without diapers, sex is too boring. So that would not work with a vanilla because I would need my diapers for sex. Without them, I am bored during it and don't enjoy it. 

 

My sexuality is very weird because I can't just have sex with anyone and I don't look at guys and think "I want to fuck him, he is so hawt" and start having perverted thoughts of him." None of that ever comes to my head when I look at guys. But if there are diapers involved, oh my. I feel different then and it doesn't matter who the guy is. I am also attracted to personality but sex doesn't cross my mind about them. 

 

[rosalie.bent]

2 hours ago, Nat said:

I found sex to be very boring and I was always anxious to get it over with. Them my husband decided to change my diaper and have sex with me and I wasn't bored anymore. It wasn't that I was asexual and lacked interest in having sex, I just have a diaper fetish and without diapers, sex is too boring. So that would not work with a vanilla because I would need my diapers for sex. Without them, I am bored during it and don't enjoy it. 

 

My sexuality is very weird because I can't just have sex with anyone and I don't look at guys and think "I want to fuck him, he is so hawt" and start having perverted thoughts of him." None of that ever comes to my head when I look at guys. But if there are diapers involved, oh my. I feel different then and it doesn't matter who the guy is. I am also attracted to personality but sex doesn't cross my mind about them. 

 

This is not rare. My baby is the same where diapers are always a part of sexual expression. Without diapers, sex is a bit vanilla. I am not sure if there is a solution to that other than having at least a token diaper element to sex. It is certainly preferable to bad sex or no sex.

[NateSean]

I think it mainly stems from being diaper lovers or having those leanings during puberty. Like many of you my focus wasn't sexual at first, as I had been thinking of diapers since before I was ten. But once I hit puberty, it was like watering a seed I had been carrying all of my life. It grew into the big ass plant that I carry with me everyday and threatens to destroy my life if I can't prune and tend to it once in awhile. (I beat the plant metaphor to death, sorry) 

On the other hand if you're relatively new to wearing as an adult, being incontinent doesn't necessarily cancel out your feelings of arousal and it could just be association. 

[Wheels]

I think for me it was simply because of the unexpected sensation I felt when I first put a diaper on out sheer curiosity. I was only 5 when I stumbled across Pampers leftover in our closet. I still remember Mom giggling as I fumbled trying to pull it up. She probably thought it was cute, but when she pulled that diaper snug between my legs and fastened the tapes for me, I was instantly overwhelmed with the sensation of this thick soft diaper enveloping my genitals so completely. It inadvertently gave me my first memorable sexual arousal. Spending the entire day snugged under the soft plastic lining of my Pampers and feeling its sensual bulky padding that caressed everything between my legs was mind blowing. I was essentially having my first sexual experience with my penis and testicles buried in the softest and warmest sensations that I had ever consciously known to that point. That experience permanently imprinted this kink in my brain that is incredibly strong with me today. I love it!

[Wetonme21]

I honestly just love the way it feels when you have them on and the excitement of when you end up using them as well since it does feel very good and you get to do your thing in them pretty much wherever you want to which is part of the fun as well!

[mick_dl]

On 2/6/2019 at 3:50 PM, Stroller said:

And for me too.  But when puberty did hit, it was closely connected to wanting to wear nappies.  From the start of puberty I was making pants out of plastic bags and wearing those to masturbate in.  Many years before I connected it with wearing makeshift nappies when I was much younger.

+1 :-) For me it was maybe at the age of 5 or 6 when I accidentally wet the bed, had had my first sexual feelings. I brought that together with the wetting and start to experiment ... Unfortunately my parents where not that happy about the wetting and telling me, they will bring me to the doc if I don't stop it. I was really scared and start to hide my "pleasure" games the same way - using kitchen towels and plastic bags. So that was probably the point where my fetish starts, it was just an sexual imprint to the "wrong" thing. It's really amazing how this little "mistake" can take that much control, that I was never be able to stay away from it for a longer time.

In the end I was lucky to find my wive who have fun with wet sex - and so both of us can have a lot fun. I think the fetish part is somehow hard to share because it's a bit autoerotic. And along your partner is not turned on by diapers, this is more for you own wild running imaginations...    

[Comfortably diapered]

I've always liked diapers since I was really little but what got me "excited" in them was when I hit puberty and wearing a super soft thick diapers got me going. It's different for everyone.