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Would you sacrifice your kink for love? 


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Would you sacrifice your kink for love? 

• Example: If your lover doesn't like your kink, would you be willing to completely attempt to suppress your love for being a baby, or loving diapers? 

For me, I'd have to say no, I wouldn't sacrifice my kink for love. My reasoning is simple. I'm happy with myself. I'm happy doing what I love. Some others would say "If they can't accept you, then you don't need them." Which is partly true, but others are willing to give more to be with whom they love. 

Would you be willing to sacrifice it for love? If so, or if not, why? I'm very curious. 

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No one should have to hide themselves and/or what they like in a relationship otherwise that could cause problems later on because you aren't communication what you want/need in terms of your desires and people can't read minds.

Compromise is always needed no matter what.

If my partner/lover had a problem with my kink then I wouldn't be in that relationship any longer simple as.  I don't mind if my partner doesn't want to be involved with me and the kinks that I like as long as she or he is okay with me doing it by myself and doesn't judge at all.

If my kink was getting in the way of things such as I don't do any work around the house or pay bills cause I'm a baby 24/7 then yeah they should have a problem with it and they should dump my arse for not being a good supportive partner towards them same goes with me forcing my kink onto them.

The best solution is to find a kinky person to be with so that kink and love can go hand in hand together more easily but I would guess most would be okay with kink as long as you do it by yourself and not involve them/others.
 

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It depends.  If we were highly compatible and they had qualities that I value more than my kink, and assuming my kink would be a hard limit for them, then yes.  I would be willing to sacrifice my kink. Or at least, not indulge it when they're around. 

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Absolutely not. My "kink" is as much a part of who I am as enjoying gaming or being left handed. I'm not going to hide a part of myself from my significant other, because that will lead to trust issues down the road. If you can't be yourself when with your partner then choose a different partner.

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I tried this, I thought that my love of another person would overtake my liking for nappies.

I suppressed my desires for a few years until it came back really strongly.

This were not so peachy in other areas of my relationship either.

I came out totally to my Girlfriend and she was defiantly not impressed.

I was fed up living a lie and I'm my depression the real genuine need to indulge in my fetish.

So my 11 year relationship ended but I was then free to properly learn about my fetish and my feelings.

Generally being an AB/DL puts us in a minority, I know there is a pretty thick collection of us in this site but they are spread out all over the world.

Also you cannot by any stretch of the imagination base a relationship on being an AB or DL, there has to be far more to it than that.

I don't think I would be happy with someone who tolerated my fetish as I would still be alone with this, it's not an easy thing to share but it can be done.

It's just finding that right someone.

 

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Going forward I will. I didn't in my marriage and we had a rough period years later when I decided I would have to tell her at any cost. I can say we had a few rough yrs, but its working out. Be honest up front you can't lie to yourself if you want a long relationship.

 

 

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I wouldn’t. And I think, it is a part of who you are, and you need to be true to yourself, first and foremost. It would be akin, to asking me to cut off a lim, to have someone’s love. They shouldn’t expect you to do that, so I don’t think they should expect you to try and drop, or suppress any feelings for your kink. If they do, could be a problem setting up for the both parties down the road. 

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I would say no I sometimes like wearing diapers mostly becaus i actually feelcomfortable in them im not hurting anybody and if my partner doesnt want to get involved with that i'm ok. Not saying you cant make certain concessions like for example dont wear diapers to a party or something. But i dont think your partner should ask of you to get rid of a kink that makes you feel comfortable doesn't require their participation and is harmless.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I would generally say that i would prefer a relationship where i could keep my  kinks.  That said, I guess the right relationship could change my mind too.

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A very interesting debate. I am going to have a different opinion to must who have already posted here.

I have been supressing my 'kink' my whole life, i have been married 21 years, and after two of them, i finally worked out what i was and that it was ok (thank you internet and dpf). You young uns who have always had the internet will never know what is like to be truely isolated with this abdl feeling. For many years i thought i was a sick twisted freak and if anyone ever found out i would be in trouble. I had no idea anyone else did this until i was 27. By then i had been married for three years. So knowing what i thought of this previously, i had not told my wife. 

Once i know it was ok and what it was called, i told her immediately. To say it was taken badly is an understatement. I am able to indulge my desires, but when i am alone. Mostly this manifests its self in online sites and stories.

I love my wife and cant imagine life without her, we came to a mutual understanding, and it is rarely mentioned any more. 

So be careful to state never! Never say never, who knows whats round the corner tomorrow, next week, next year... love is a strange feeling and can make people do wierd things.

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There has to be give and take in any relationship.  Everyone has their different kinks, and with the AB/DL fetish it is really something very few have been able to give up.  In my case, I don't wear a lot, maybe 3 mornings a week when I get up early and then only for about 3 or 4 hours at best.  A few times a year I go out of town shopping for the day and I'll wear diapers the whole time.  Diapers don't consume my every waking hour like they do with some people.  As I've said before, I believe in a good healthy balance between diapers and regular life.

With all that said, any relationship has to have some give and take.  No two people are the same, therefore there are always going to be some small conflicts.  Your girlfriend or wife may like the ballet or opera and you might hate it!  You agree to go with her now and then because it's something she likes to do.  She may hate football, but agrees to go to a game with you once in a while because it's something you like.  She can't expect you to go to the opera every week or every performance of the ballet, and likewise you can't buy season tickets to the games and expect her to go with you every time.  That is the give and take.  If she insists you go with her to the ballet every week but won't let you go to the football games, then the relationship is all one sided and you can pretty much tell how miserable the rest of your life will be if you continue.

The same can apply to your diapers.  If the wife tollerates them at times, good, but don't overdo it.  If you enjoy wearing diapers pretty much all the time just for fun but the wife or girlfriend doesn't like it, you may have to taper back to 3 days a week instead of 7 days, or maybe wear to bed only a couple nights a week instead of every night (unless you actually wet the bed and have no choice in the matter).  You have to make sure the girlfriend, boyfriend or wife knows that this is a fetish that just doesn't stop or go away, but you are willing to compromise, cut back and wear diapers only some times, not all the time.  If she is unwilling to compromise, chances are she will be unwilling to compromise on other things as well.  That is when you want to say, "Is it worth going through the rest of my life with someone like this, possibly getting divorced in a couple years and end up paying child support and all?"  Remember, compromise works both ways.  If your partner in the relationship offers a compromise but you are unwilling to bend or work with him or her, then the fault is yours, not his or hers.  Sometimes you just have to make changes and give some things up that you have had your own way when in a relationship.  Which is more important to you?  I would guess the relationship, otherwise you wouldn't have started one with someone to begin with. 

You might be lucky starting a relationship with someone who may be 100% accepting of your diapered lifestyle and participates with you.  That has happened, but you can't expect that to be the case.  Everyone has to be willing to compromise, accept people as they are and work to make the relationship good.  If one or the other can't, best to just move on. 

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  • 2 months later...
On 5/13/2018 at 1:33 PM, Little.labels said:

Would you sacrifice your kink for love? 

If I have to sacrifice it, then it isn't love. So I guess not. I don't care if my partner participates in my fetish or not, as long as they accept it as a part of me and allow me to practice it myself. As far as an ideal partner goes, I think it's someone who makes me feel happy, someone who gives me another reason to wake up in the morning, and again someone who accepts me. And hopefully I can reciprocate those things for them. However, I don't think that a partner necessarily needs to participate in my kink to fulfill all those things I listed as ideal. Essentially, it feels too shallow to say my partner needs to be a part of this kink. If I wanted that I'd look for a fwb

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On 6/13/2018 at 11:23 PM, froggy said:

I would generally say that i would prefer a relationship where i could keep my  kinks.  That said, I guess the right relationship could change my mind too.

My sentiment too. You are who you are and despite what you may think, it will not change. No matter how hard I tried, I always come back to diapers and plastic pants (although they are no longer optional).

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9 hours ago, padded_husky said:

No, love is not worth sacrificing any part of who I am because love means accepting 100% of everything someone is. It's loving a person's positivies and negativities not forcing someone to give yo something that makes them happy. 

Excellent. Well said. Couldn't put it better.

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This got me thinking.  I think I am safe in saying most of the kink we are thinking about here is diapers.  Why do we like diapers?  Many reasons, but I think for a lot of us it all boils down to first being curious about it, trying a diaper and then discovering how good it felt!  Maybe we got off in the diaper or had something really special or sexual that happened when we wore diapers that makes us feel, "Wow!  This is great and I love it!"

Lets say we get a girlfriend, boyfriend, wife or whatever.  We think, "I don't care what she/he says, I'm not giving up my diapers because I love them so much!"  What would we think if our spouse said, "Let's try this when we make out", and it's something you have never done before.  You try it and say, "Wow!  This is the most fantastic sex I ever had!"  It has nothing at all to do with diapers, but now you get to thinking that diapers aren't the greatest thing after all.  This new thing is even better!  After all, you may not have given much thought to wearing diapers before you got an interest and tried them out of curiosity for the first time, so maybe trying something new that your spouse suggests could be even better than diaper play, especially if he/she is turned off by diapers and wants you to stop and give them up.  Probably not, but it just got me thinking if one new kink your partner introduces you to could end up being so great you would replace the diaper kink for this new one.

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On 9/10/2018 at 10:52 PM, Aki 315 said:

If I have to sacrifice it, then it isn't love. So I guess not. I don't care if my partner participates in my fetish or not, as long as they accept it as a part of me and allow me to practice it myself. As far as an ideal partner goes, I think it's someone who makes me feel happy, someone who gives me another reason to wake up in the morning, and again someone who accepts me. And hopefully I can reciprocate those things for them. However, I don't think that a partner necessarily needs to participate in my kink to fulfill all those things I listed as ideal. Essentially, it feels too shallow to say my partner needs to be a part of this kink. If I wanted that I'd look for a fwb

Agreed. If I have to give up my fetish for someone to love me, they don't really love me.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Interesting question... I'm pretty sure that it's nearly impossible to quit that kind of fetish/kink. So it matters little if I like to do for someone else or for yourself, because the chances for success are minimal. Knowing that it's probably a better option to look for someone who shares that kind of lifestyle - or at last accept it.  

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  • 4 weeks later...

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