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Hello all! ^^

 

I would like to take the time and tell you a little about myself. I am a 34 y/o healthy, continent male (no history of bladder/bowel issues) that has had an interest in diapers from a very early age.

 

I was around 7 years old when I “borrowed” a plastic backed Pampers diaper from my 2 year old cousin’s diaper bag. The babysitter was my aunt; who is the coolest person ever and knows about my “interests” in diapers. I unfolded it and put it in my underwear. I walked around in it and heard the crinkle and wished I could wear diapers all the time as well instead of my “big boy” undies. Of course, there is a whole lot more to my story but this is a very brief summary to keep from boring you all. :D

 

I’ve had 24/7 stretches (for up to 6 months) in the past but had to stop due to financial/personal reasons when I was in college.

 

Now, here I am at 34 years old and still wanting to be back in diapers for good. The desire isn’t going away and I’m tired of fighting it. It’s what makes me whole so that’s just the way it is and is going to be for now on. Over the years, my desire to become diaper dependent has not waned in the slightest and no matter how many times I place it on the back burner - they’ve always been there. So I’ve decided to go through with this.

 

I also have a girlfriend, who I love with all my heart who completely supports me in becoming diaper dependent and she actually prefers me in them! I call her “mommy” most of the time which she loves. Having said all of this, she was vaguely familiar with the AB/DL community before we started dating ~7 mo ago. She supports me and loves me for who I am. This is very hard to come by especially since there’s no clear cut answer as to why someone would have the desire to become incontinent and how much our community is misunderstood.

 

I have slight AB tendencies, but I’m not an exhibitionist or advertise the fact I wear diapers out in public. That’s not for me and please DO NOT post anything about ‘showing your diaper off’ etc. I have a very respectful job and conduct myself in a very professional manner dealing with well over 50 clients on average per day in a clinical setting. The bottom line: I value discretion and privacy to maintain my dignity. If (inevitably) my diaper rides up the back exposing it a bit, then 99% of people will assume it's a medical condition and mind their own business. The other 1% can ....well you get the point. B) **I have a onesie so I will wear it often at work**

 

Reading the other forum posts has given me a lot of insight and motivation to push forward in my journey to diaper dependence.

 

For now, I am only untraining my bladder, so I will try to retain my bowel control. From what I’ve read, some people have experienced a decline in their bowel control during their bladder untraining adventures. This makes perfect sense considering the nerves that are responsible for both bladder and bowel control are interlinked. ie; if you weaken one neural pathway, then there is a natural weakening/desensitization of the other. I will, of course document and report any changes in both my bladder and bowel control.

 

Another thing of note is masturbation. I’m abstaining from it due to risk of exercising the muscles by accident. I have also fallen victim to the feeling you get after you’ve “done the deed” and don’t want to put another diaper on. It’s just not worth it and the fact that it increases DHT in men is more than enough to keep me from doing it. I have a full head of hair and plan to keep it! ^^

 

I will keep my diaper area shaved clean at all times for obvious reasons.

 

 

My Current Continence Level

 

A brief note about my current continence level. I am currently completely continent in both bladder and bowels. I wake up completely dry every night, but I love wetting my diaper prior to bed and sleeping in it overnight and waking up pretending I soaked it in my sleep. Eventually, I hope this will happen for real! ^^

 

If there is any advantage I have coming into this journey, I would have to say that from years of wearing diapers often and the 24/7 stretches in the past - that I notice once I have a diaper on, that I can wet anywhere at anytime with very minimal effort or thought at the slightest urge. Along with many other people and I’m no exception, the hardest position for me to initiate wetting is in a position when my urethra is kinked - esp while driving. It’s weird because in the past, I had “good” days and “bad” days. If I was fluid-loaded, I clenched up and/or it was hard to start peeing. If I sipped fluids throughout the day (3 big gulps of water in 10-15 min intervals) along with practicing the “reverse kegel” of keeping the bladder muscles relaxed as much as possible; then I’ll go immediately without issue.

 

I’ve noticed if I’ve worn 24/7 for a brief period of time (like 1-2 days) and haven't exercised control of my bladder muscles - that I get frequent urges throughout the day (about every 30 min - 1 hr) and will continue for 4-5 days afterwards. This is good news in my book because it means that the muscles are weakening faster than they can gain strength back. ^^

 

IMO, these constant urges that come about of being out of diapers after a 24/7 shift is enough to motivate me to put a diaper back on. No having to rush to the restroom and interrupt my day at work (medical setting).

 

My current stock of diapers are 2 cases of the Abena M4’s Plastic Backed and one case of the Tena Active Fit Maxi (great discreet daytime diaper!). I plan to keep at least an extra case on hand at all times for those instances when I slack off in ordering diapers, which is few and far between but it happens.

 

To sum all this up:

-I’m always diapered 24/7 from this point onward

-Keep the bladder muscles relaxed and practice reverse kegeling after I wet

-Stay well hydrated throughout the day to practice uncontrolled wetting and 16 oz of water before bed

-Keeping bed adequately protected with quality mattress protector and trust my diapers

-Listen to hypnosis recording; preferably before bed (this is optional and to help my subconscious adjust)

-Expect WEEKLY UPDATES from here on out documenting any changes I experience in my continence, unless I come up with something to mention or ask about that pertains to my personal situation.

 

So that’s it for my gameplan. If anyone has any questions, suggestions, or anything you feel I left out; please feel free to ask them here! I will try my best to answer in a timely manner as I work full time and life just gets in the way.

 

Thank you very much for reading my post and here’s to a new life of being padded 24/7! ^^

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It is a long and winding path my friend.  Stay confident and positive and diapered you will stay.  Do not get frustrated with the slow results and periods of no changes.  It takes a lot of time before you become physically dependant on diapers.  More often than not people become mentally dependant on them much faster.

Personally I recommend masturbation.  This was the biggest thing I had to fight through to stay in diapers permanently and now that I am mentally dependant on my diapers I have zero desire to remove them even after a sexual release.  It takes a lot of practice to feel this way and having a loving and accepting wife can be a key contributor to your success.  I had my wife supervise all my masturbation and immediately put me in a new diaper after and she did not give me an option to not wear them.  After a few weeks she was no longer needed to force me back into diapers.  Now I just have my fun time, fill my diaper, and roll over and go to sleep.  It is unrealistic to think you will be able to sustain from any kind of sexual release for the time it takes to become unpotty trained.  I wish you to best od luck and I hope your diapered dreams become reality.

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9 hours ago, MarkSmith said:

It is a long and winding path my friend.  Stay confident and positive and diapered you will stay.  Do not get frustrated with the slow results and periods of no changes.  It takes a lot of time before you become physically dependant on diapers.  More often than not people become mentally dependant on them much faster.

Personally I recommend masturbation.  This was the biggest thing I had to fight through to stay in diapers permanently and now that I am mentally dependant on my diapers I have zero desire to remove them even after a sexual release.  It takes a lot of practice to feel this way and having a loving and accepting wife can be a key contributor to your success.  I had my wife supervise all my masturbation and immediately put me in a new diaper after and she did not give me an option to not wear them.  After a few weeks she was no longer needed to force me back into diapers.  Now I just have my fun time, fill my diaper, and roll over and go to sleep.  It is unrealistic to think you will be able to sustain from any kind of sexual release for the time it takes to become unpotty trained.  I wish you to best od luck and I hope your diapered dreams become reality.

Thanks for the reply, MarkSmith! ^^

Yeah according to a lot of blogs and posts on DD (including the 12MDTG) they recommend masturbation to clear chance of nighttime erections. I also know it stimulates you to urinate which is a plus. 

The b**** of it is when I'm done making stickies (usually needing to change at that point) I fall victim to post-coital tristesse. I know that anyone with an interest in diapers can not say it's 100% nonsexual bc they cover our most sensitive area of our body - a sex organ. You are right, it is tough to fight the urges to get off and make a sticky. I'm just paranoid about inadvertently exercising the sphincter muscle(s) right before the buildup. If I don't "build up" right before release (exercising the muscles by doing so) then I get no satisfaction and feel there is more semen in there. It's a catch 22. I think to myself it's not really worth it and abstain. Masturbating helps me sleep for sure but I hate the post-coital tristesse afterwards.

TBH - I talked with my girlfriend about it and she said if using hypnosis or anything else (even penis shrinking) - which I know is hard to do without drugs, then she's all for it. I wouldn't mind it honestly but that's just a thought on the side and I don't want to use anything unnatural/chemical to do it. There are hypnosis files that target this (I don't think I'm allowed to mention external sources on DD) and could try them out and not get hard or turned on in a diaper. Just food for thought, you know?

I should clear something up. My girlfriend and I are not living together (we're obviously not married) and I see her maybe two to three times a week due to my work schedule but she loves changing me. We also take naps together. She gets angry when I'm not wearing bc she understands my desires to be dependent on diapers is beyond my control. People like me and others that desire this were "programmed" that way. So yes, your point about her keeping me in check is definitely a plus and a step in the right direction on this path.

Thanks again for taking the time to reply with your input and look forward to more suggestions or encouragement. Every little bit helps! ^^

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Here are my 2 cents!  I think most of us have the same feelings once we have sexual release.  I got over the "I don't want diapers" post release by masturbating into my diapers and then continuing to wear my diapers until I peed again.  By that time my desire to wear a new diaper had returned and I was able to continue.  24/7 is mind over matter.  There will be times that you just don't want to put on another diaper.  But you must if you want to become dependant.  

I have been 24/7 for just over 5 years.  I only wet and still have complete control over my bowels.  I have been successful to the point that I have been diagnosed with OAB and UI.  I can't realistically not wear diapers and plastic pants without wetting myself.  I started wetting at night in 2008 and have been diapered for bed since.  My wife and I just celebrated our 38th wedding anniversary and I have worn diapers off and on the entire time.

Stay the course and you will succeed.  I change into a new diaper like most people change into clean underwear .  BTW, I'm almost twice your age so I don't have the hardness problems you do, LOL.  I wish I had gone 24/7 much earlier.

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Bettypooh gave me the greatest advice towards my goal of diaper dependancy by simply explaining to me to not worry about my bladder and just let nature take its course.  At the beginning of my unpotty training mentally I was frustrated constantly analyzing if I have my bladder sphincters relaxed.  Now I simply go potty in my diaper whenever I feel the urge to do so.  It could mean that I leak just a little into my padding or flood my diaper.  Staying this course takes a lot of patience and preservation and you have to be in it for the long run to see results.

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12 hours ago, MarkSmith said:

Bettypooh gave me the greatest advice towards my goal of diaper dependancy by simply explaining to me to not worry about my bladder and just let nature take its course.  At the beginning of my unpotty training mentally I was frustrated constantly analyzing if I have my bladder sphincters relaxed.  Now I simply go potty in my diaper whenever I feel the urge to do so.  It could mean that I leak just a little into my padding or flood my diaper.  Staying this course takes a lot of patience and preservation and you have to be in it for the long run to see results.

Thanks for the reply! That's basically what I'm doing with the going at the slightest urge with no holding back.

My question is that if I stayed the course (like you suggested) and not always analyzing whether my bladder sphincters are relaxed (essentially conscious practicing reverse kegaling), will they naturally weaken and get to the point where my muscles just "learn" to stay relaxed without thinking of keeping my muscles relaxed? Does that make sense? A lot of guides say to always try to keep the sphincters relaxed which is obviously a conscious/analyzing effort. I want to know (from your personal experience) if that is what happened with your wetting pattern over time.

Thanks again for your input and suggestions! ^^

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I've done so well in ignoring my bladder that it's tough to honestly say what happens other than my diaper simply gets wetter as the day goes by without me knowing anything about it :D

I do have some control left after 5+ years but it's very short in nature and somewhat unreliable. One thing still bugs me though- late in the workday I sometimes retain a flood unknowingly, only noticing when my bladder is full. Happens maybe one day in three :wacko: My guess is that it's a subconscious 'self-defense' thing since my diaper is usually quite wet by then and I don't want to leak there, but it happens even on my drier days when there's plenty of capacity left to handle it too, so I don't know. I can't find the cause for that but it does indicate that my internal sphincter can still function fully and my external sphincter still mostly holds but not for long :whistling: And my bladder almost always holds at night when I have to slightly wake to release it. Another oddity is that I anticipate and notice my first wetting in a fresh diaper and I sometimes give that a push which I'm sure is caused my my literal love of knowing my diaper is wet :blush:

So it's not quite like the totality of the one-year method but close, and it hasn't affected my bowel control at all. It did take me about two years to gain most of this and there could a little more loss of control ahead of me (especially at night) but I am happy and I am absolutely unable to go without diapers now, which was my only real goal in all of this. And as I always say this was the very best decision I've ever made in almost six decades of life with my only regret being that I didn't do it sooner :girl_happy: It's a viable option to the other methods.

Bettypooh

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4 hours ago, Bettypooh said:

I've done so well in ignoring my bladder that it's tough to honestly say what happens other than my diaper simply gets wetter as the day goes by without me knowing anything about it :D

I do have some control left after 5+ years but it's very short in nature and somewhat unreliable. One thing still bugs me though- late in the workday I sometimes retain a flood unknowingly, only noticing when my bladder is full. Happens maybe one day in three :wacko: My guess is that it's a subconscious 'self-defense' thing since my diaper is usually quite wet by then and I don't want to leak there, but it happens even on my drier days when there's plenty of capacity left to handle it too, so I don't know. I can't find the cause for that but it does indicate that my internal sphincter can still function fully and my external sphincter still mostly holds but not for long :whistling: And my bladder almost always holds at night when I have to slightly wake to release it. Another oddity is that I anticipate and notice my first wetting in a fresh diaper and I sometimes give that a push which I'm sure is caused my my literal love of knowing my diaper is wet :blush:

So it's not quite like the totality of the one-year method but close, and it hasn't affected my bowel control at all. It did take me about two years to gain most of this and there could a little more loss of control ahead of me (especially at night) but I am happy and I am absolutely unable to go without diapers now, which was my only real goal in all of this. And as I always say this was the very best decision I've ever made in almost six decades of life with my only regret being that I didn't do it sooner :girl_happy: It's a viable option to the other methods.

Bettypooh

I know the internal sphincter is beyond our conscious control. Unfortunately, it boils down to either 1) physically modifying the sphincter (caths/surgery etc) - the most dangerous method which I would prefer NOT to do OR 2) Hypnosis/meditation (mind over matter) techniques to alter the subconscious to convince the sphincter to reverse the action slowly to relax more over time combined with letting go as soon as the urge hits.

Bettypooh - it seems to me (correct me if I'm wrong) that you hesitate to wet and are mentioning that you are concentrating/worrying a bit on the capacity of the diaper left although claim that you're not holding regardless. It seems like a subconscious (societal) mental block that's making it take so long to overcome. Not to mention you're not wet every night by now which is bizarre in the least. Something needs to change besides your diapers ;)

I've found that by listening to the Clearing Tape alone by ForAdultBabies has helped me tremendously in getting in the "loose sphincter" constantly mode. I even dribble while listening to it which has never happened with any hypnosis I've listened to. Blake Jordan also says this has helped in his posts and I agree tremendously. FYI - I listened to it even before I read his posts and suggestions so even the better to support it.

I'll keep posting and the weekly update is coming soon. Stay tuned ^^

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@DprTraining-

I'm not hesitant to pee really, I just become aware of what I hadn't been aware of till then ;) My bladder is then retaining something which is why I feel it, but it's not much- say 100mL,And I've nothing to overcome since I've reached my goals, even though further is possible and may come anyway. Nothing odd about me not bedwetting; it's not something I really want but if it happens I won't fight it. As you're rather new here perhaps you haven't read of these things and me in all my previous posts ;)  As best I'm aware of, my internal sphincter is normally open or extremely weak most of the time when I'm awake. My external sphincter usually follows suit, just not always.  :whistling:

My goal wasn't and isn't to constantly dribble, but to truly need diapers because of a lack of bladder control however that happened and I'm well past there now :girl_happy: If things go further then fine, and if they don't I'm fine with that too B) I've gone from full bladder retention to retaining only a slight amount (it never completely empties without a 'push' but it never fills more than slightly) and the amount retained keeps getting smaller. A slower method with somewhat different goals than most folks, just a slightly different path which is better suited to me :D

Bettypooh

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@Bettypooh

It seems my lack of remembering the countless posts I've read on the inc desires board from numerous users has eluded me. I apologize. Along the same line of thought - I said in my intro that I'm not technically "new" here and have followed these forums since they spawned. I'm only new by membership so yeah I was a lurker for awhile until I decided to take the plunge for real. ^^;

I guess it's an experience and "feeling" (or lack thereof) that one can only get by travelling the path. People's ideas of "diaper dependence" vary. I just was perplexed as to why bedwetting wouldn't naturally have fallen suit after so many years due to the muscle atrophy you have experienced. I guess it boils down to what you want as you said. *nod*

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Why don’t you cage yourself in chastity aswell. That will stop the masturbation and shrink your penis much quicker than you think. After I spent just a month caged, I lost about an inch. To “release” you can massage your prostate. You’ve got no idea how good it is to “release” without an erection :)

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On 4/26/2018 at 9:34 PM, DprTraining said:

@Bettypooh

It seems my lack of remembering the countless posts I've read on the inc desires board from numerous users has eluded me. I apologize. Along the same line of thought - I said in my intro that I'm not technically "new" here and have followed these forums since they spawned. I'm only new by membership so yeah I was a lurker for awhile until I decided to take the plunge for real. ^^;

I guess it's an experience and "feeling" (or lack thereof) that one can only get by travelling the path. People's ideas of "diaper dependence" vary. I just was perplexed as to why bedwetting wouldn't naturally have fallen suit after so many years due to the muscle atrophy you have experienced. I guess it boils down to what you want as you said. *nod*

The question is what exactly is diaper dependancy?  Do you have to be physically dependant on them?  A lot of people need to be in diapers permanently because of anxiety and stress relief.  I would argue they are just as daiper dependant as someone with a physical need.

The key here is everyone is different both physically and mentally.  We all become "dependant" in different ways and at different times.  About the only thing you can completely control if your desire is to become diaper dependant is ALWAYS wear a diaper all the time.  The rest will follow.  Patience is a virtue when it comes to unpotty training yourself and trust me I know the frustrations that can be felt due to lack of progress so to speak. 

2 hours ago, Matthaydon said:

Why don’t you cage yourself in chastity aswell. That will stop the masturbation and shrink your penis much quicker than you think. After I spent just a month caged, I lost about an inch. To “release” you can massage your prostate. You’ve got no idea how good it is to “release” without an erection :)

There are some advantages with wearing a chastity device when it comes to wearing diapers permanently.  Honestly masturbation prevention I find is NOT the most benificial aspect of being caged.  When your wee wee is in a chastity device you are always positioned down and to the middle which is great for the prevention of diaper leaks.  Night time erections also are prevented which also helps to avoid leaks.  Hygiene and pain from your scrotum stretching at night are the downside.

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21 hours ago, MarkSmith said:

 

There are some advantages with wearing a chastity device when it comes to wearing diapers permanently.  Honestly masturbation prevention I find is NOT the most benificial aspect of being caged.  When your wee wee is in a chastity device you are always positioned down and to the middle which is great for the prevention of diaper leaks.  Night time erections also are prevented which also helps to avoid leaks.  Hygiene and pain from your scrotum stretching at night are the downside.

 

 

I always say when people talk about wearing both chastity devices and diapers that they have to check the lock well not to end up with a lock filled with rust as I guess most wearers wish to be able to get out of the cage sometime in the future.

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1 hour ago, John64 said:

 

I always say when people talk about wearing both chastity devices and diapers that they have to check the lock well not to end up with a lock filled with rust as I guess most wearers wish to be able to get out of the cage sometime in the future.

or at least have a good pair of bolt cutters in their toolbox.

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6 minutes ago, Brudda Voodu said:

or at least have a good pair of bolt cutters in their toolbox.

22 hours ago, MarkSmith said:

 

There are some advantages with wearing a chastity device when it comes to wearing diapers permanently.  Honestly masturbation prevention I find is NOT the most benificial aspect of being caged.  When your wee wee is in a chastity device you are always positioned down and to the middle which is great for the prevention of diaper leaks.  Night time erections also are prevented which also helps to avoid leaks.  Hygiene and pain from your scrotum stretching at night are the downside.

One thing to focus on is to regularely check the lock for tracks of rust when wearing under diapers as I guess most people don´t want to get locked up forever.

 

Brudda, it depends on what kind of a lock you have, there are those that you can´t use a bolt cutter on.

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1 Week Update:

First off, I must say it has been more exciting than an inconvenience to implement diapers back into my life again!The two largest hurdles in the transition has been dealing with work and finding places in public to change. On average,I'm going through about 5 diapers a day; Abena M4's and NS Supreme Lite w/ one or two boosters.I now carry a Jansport bookbag with my supplies without any issue(s) - it's the same bag I used in college so I found a reason to use it again. ^^

Wearing to work has been an adjustment. I work in the veterinary field (tech for 14 years now) and I bend down and twist & turn all day long with animal restraint and drawing samples and whatnot. As you can imagine, it's a very physical job and I have to take precautions when dealing with clients. I have an Abena bodystocking (aka...onesie) which is a must because scrubs tend to ride up when you bend over. I'm a hot-natured person, but since I'm in diapers now, it can't be helped. I also upped a size in my scrubs to compensate for the extra padding. ^^ I take gulps of water between appointments morning and evening. I change at around lunchtime - I live ~ 5 min from work so I can go home or go to the restroom in the back and change. Wetting at work is sporadic and I wet at the slightest urge. It's nice to have an empty bladder!

At all other times outside of work I wear a bit thicker padding w/ a booster so I can go out without having to change as often. Wetting is easy while doing other things like playing a video game, walking, shooting basketball, and shopping. I take about 3 gulps of water every 15-20 minutes constantly throughout the day to keep the fluids moving.

As of now, what I feel in terms of wetting is dependent (no pun intended) on how wet/bulky my diaper is at the time of release. There is no resistance in the sphincters, so the only feeling is the urine flowing through my urethra and into my diaper. I can do this while walking, sitting, lying in bed, and even driving (albeit sometimes I get a kink but staying relaxed it eventually starts to flow). When family comes to visit, there is hardly any hesitation to urinate and everything is flowing fine. I can safely say that I can look my mother and grandmother in the eyes and comfortably wet even while having a conversation. However, if my diaper is ~ 1/2 to 3/4 capacity, then wetting is only noticed in small amounts (~2-3 tablespoons of urine but this is just a guess?) at the tip of my penis.

**A few things to note that I've noticed: I'm wetting in small amounts (a few tablespoons to 1/2 cup?) when I drink something. The urge to urinate usually happens within 5-10 minutes after taking a few gulps of water. If I remember correctly (while trying not to pay much attention to it), I have been having 4-5 of these small wettings as long as I'm drinking some form of fluid. Otherwise, when I'm having a "dry spell" (the only way I can describe it), my muscles are still relaxed but it's a feeling I can describe as slightly uncomfortable with an obviously empty bladder. When I start sipping again, I wet in small amounts. Based on what I've read, it's possible my bladder might spasm which I think I might have experienced very briefly a few times but it was the feeling of a small "tick" in my muscles. I also notice if I'm surprised by something (a jump scare or an unexpected notification tone when concentrating on the phone), I will reflexively clench my muscles but it's VERY brief. Almost immediately after my muscles will resume the relaxed state. If anyone has any input as to what these changes might mean (especially so early on) then I would love to hear them. :D

BEDTIME:

About an hour before bed (~10PM; 11PM is actual bedtime) I take 5 mg of melatonin on days I've had too much coffee or green tea or having trouble sleeping. As for diapering at bedtime, I play it by ear. When I get home from work (~7PM) I change into a thicker diaper (Abena M4 w booster or BetterDry - which I'm seriously considering switching to because I tried a sample that Northshore sent and they fit very well and hold a lot). At about the time I go to bed and take the melatonin, my diaper is about soaked to capacity and I change into a thicker diaper (Northshore Supreme w/ booster) and drink ~ 16 oz of water over a span of ~ 30 min. At around 10:30 when I'm finished with the water, my diaper is slightly damp I will watch a TV show or movie/anime until bedtime and put on the Sleep Track from ABDLRecordings and loop it (sounds like rain). I have been woken up (~4-5AM) to wet and fall back asleep. Sometimes, I wake to my alarm (~7AM) with the urgent need to go but my bladder lets loose immediately flooding my diaper giving me a happy feeling of instant relief. I also give myself a mental affirmation while it's happening that this would be so much better when it happens while I'm asleep.

Bowel Control:

As I said in my first post, I will report on any changes in my bowel control as well. When I notice a BM, it's right at the sphincter to the point where if I relaxed a bit more - it would push itself out with peristaltic action. That is normal for any continent adult with normal, formed stool that drinks enough water combined with a healthy diet with fruits/veggies. When I'm at home and don't have guests/family over, I usually go in my diaper (slightly pushing if stool is bulkier/more consistent than usual). Usually by this time, it's time to change my soaked diaper anyways. Honestly, I do a BM just for convenience ~ 30% of the time but otherwise I do it before I change my diaper to avoid the potty. Otherwise, I will slide my diaper down just enough to do the deed. Wetting occurs in my diaper while in the process of having a BM this way.

I also am relaxed enough that small drops/dribbles of urine occur in the process of changing my diaper. On a few occasions between changes, I urinated right then and there (of course I felt it at this early stage in my untraining) on the bedroom/bathroom floor, whereever. I use these opportunities to give myself a positive mental note that "this will happen because I'm incontinent now." These small mental cues seem to help a lot to keep me in a positive state of mind while untraining. ^^

In Summary:

All in all, going back to diapers has been a wonderful change! Even in just over a week, I feel that I've become more accepting of my diapered state and building a sense of permanence. Of course, I feel that this will all become more ingrained with time as muscle memory and all develop. Wetting is second nature and I know I just have to be patient with the whole process. There have been a few times in the morning where I wake up with a full bladder and just wanted to go to the bathroom, strip off my diaper, and pee in the toilet thinking it would be much easier to do and to avoid risking my diaper flooding and leaking. I've persevered through these thoughts and powered through. At the very least, my muscles down there are feeling a little different since I've been practicing relaxed sphincter tone. I think I'm making unbelievable fast progress and adjusting well despite how early in the training I am.

So this is it for my 1+ week update and will report back in a week or so and try to respond to comments as soon as I get around to them. My schedule has been erratic and overall busy with life. Thanks again for reading my progress update and I hope to hear from anyone with questions or words of wisdom. ^^

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18 hours ago, DprTraining said:

There have been a few times in the morning where I wake up with a full bladder and just wanted to go to the bathroom, strip off my diaper, and pee in the toilet thinking it would be much easier to do and to avoid risking my diaper flooding and leaking. I've persevered through these thoughts and powered through. 

When this happens to me I just go into the bathroom, remove my night time clothes and protective panties and simply flood my diaper.  If my diaper leaks my pee pee can easily be wiped off the tiled bathroom floor.  After I am done I remove my diaper and jump into the shower.  More often than not I am dribbling along the way before and after entering the shower so I have to wipe the floor anyway.  Even after heavy night time use once my restrictive clothing is removed a final flooding generally does not cause my diaper to leak, just heavily sag.  Since I am not sitting or laying down afterwards there is no concern for press out leaks.

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  • 1 month later...

6 Week Update

This hot weather in GA is kicking my butt. I've even thought of switching to a cloth backed diaper to allow more breathability but I've been managing well so far and really love my plastic backed diapers.

There's been some things of note with my bladder. First off, I've noticed that at times, no matter how much or what I consume I will hit the "dry spells" where there is literally nothing flowing anymore. These times are random and bear in mind that I'm staying adequately hydrated and sipping on fluids (mainly water) throughout the day. For instance, I will have small, natural voids of about 1-3 tablespoons every 5-10 minutes for a period of 3 - 5 hours, then it comes to a point where I can feel nothing building up and feel disappointed that the constant "dribbling/flow" small voids stopped even staying hydrated. This also makes me feel that I'm not practicing my reverse kegels enough in these "dry spells". I've been reading and know urine production can slow down towards bedtime (due to antidiuretic hormones and junk) but even then sometimes I still produce urine in the 5 - 10 min dribbling episodes right up until 11PM when I go to bed. This is the best way I can describe it.

Wetting during the day is getting easier and I only involuntarily clench up if something startles me or I get into an unnatural position - otherwise (to my knowledge) I am relaxed at all times and the pee flows out well when it happens. When I'm on a roll and having my small dribbling/spurt episodes I'm starting to pay less attention to it but at this point I still feel the flow start without resistance and staying unclenched as long as I can. Sort of like "oh it happened" paying it hardly any mind at all and move on immediately. When I'm unclenched after my voids, I go about my day walking, talking, working etc and am unaware if I have gone back into the "clenched" state or not because it's completely left my mind in the background. I'm excited to see what will happen because I'm thinking it's related to the "feel - think - do" cycle as outlined in the 12MDTP where my mind/body is trying to eliminate the "think" aspect of the process. I'm predicting over the next few months I will definitely just urinate with little warning or feeling in increasingly smaller amounts and will just about overcome the "think" aspect since there won't be much time to "think" about anything.

Another thing I've noticed is that if I'm laying down or doing my hypnosis - I have these little "twitch" like feelings in my bladder sort of like a fish is swimming around in there and slightly smacked it's tail against my bladder wall. It's not painful in any way but the only think I can imagine this to be is bladder spasms. They started around the second or third week of my diaper training. These are random and rarely occur when standing. If I sneeze or have a cough (which I recently got over a small sinus bug) I will spurt small amounts of pee.  **Read below in the BM section for an interesting tidbit**

Nothing much has changed in the terms of nighttime untraining. I will drink about 16 oz of water within 30 min - 1 hr of bedtime and wake up to almost a full bladder 1 - 2 times a night. I have to roll slightly or shift my legs a bit to pee but it starts. It's annoying to be woken up like this (when i already have a hard time sleeping being a night owl and all) but I see it as something awesome to look forward to. From what I've heard - once you start wetting in your sleep, you get the best sleep you've ever had in your life. I know it's a double edged sword and that once true bedwetting occurs as an adult it's near impossible to reverse, but for the price of having the best sleep ever and I'm willing to live with that.

BM's - They are controllable and no accidents HOWEVER I've noticed that by keeping my bladder muscles relaxed constantly, I will accidentally pass gas - even sometimes triggering some urine dribbling. As to the tidbit above, if my stool is loose or having a day of soft-serve or pudding-like consistency stool (essentially diarrhea) and I cough, I will either have a very audible fart or I will even expel a small amount of (semi-formed) stool into my diaper. Otherwise, nothing else noticeable or interesting to report on my BM's.

Well this is it for the update and please feel free to post suggestions or anything that you've experienced similar to me and maybe what I can expect at this point. Thanks again and stay diapered!

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I think you're right about the 'twitches', probably bladder spasms but of a small nature. That would be a sign of progress- the body learning that they are no longer needed so they're fading out. I seem to recall something similar happened with me but that's been loing ago and I don't trust my memory that well (nor should you trust my memory either) :P

Bettypooh 

  • Like 1
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9 hours ago, Bettypooh said:

I think you're right about the 'twitches', probably bladder spasms but of a small nature. That would be a sign of progress- the body learning that they are no longer needed so they're fading out. I seem to recall something similar happened with me but that's been loing ago and I don't trust my memory that well (nor should you trust my memory either) :P

Bettypooh 

Thanks for the reply @Bettypooh! It makes my day when I see people finally give me some input instead of just recording it like a journal to myself (which technically I guess that's what it is), but the replies are invaluable which is a big reason I started a topic ONLINE in ID. Else I would stick to old school paper and notebook. :rolleyes:

It's good to hear/see the word "progress" and it actually surprised me that the spasms started so early in my DT. It's a little exciting actually and hope it really does fade out more in time. Thanks again for your reply and keep 'em coming! :thumbsup:

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  • 6 months later...
On 6/5/2018 at 2:19 AM, DprTraining said:

6 Week Update

This hot weather in GA is kicking my butt. I've even thought of switching to a cloth backed diaper to allow more breathability but I've been managing well so far and really love my plastic backed diapers.

There's been some things of note with my bladder. First off, I've noticed that at times, no matter how much or what I consume I will hit the "dry spells" where there is literally nothing flowing anymore. These times are random and bear in mind that I'm staying adequately hydrated and sipping on fluids (mainly water) throughout the day. For instance, I will have small, natural voids of about 1-3 tablespoons every 5-10 minutes for a period of 3 - 5 hours, then it comes to a point where I can feel nothing building up and feel disappointed that the constant "dribbling/flow" small voids stopped even staying hydrated. This also makes me feel that I'm not practicing my reverse kegels enough in these "dry spells". I've been reading and know urine production can slow down towards bedtime (due to antidiuretic hormones and junk) but even then sometimes I still produce urine in the 5 - 10 min dribbling episodes right up until 11PM when I go to bed. This is the best way I can describe it.

Wetting during the day is getting easier and I only involuntarily clench up if something startles me or I get into an unnatural position - otherwise (to my knowledge) I am relaxed at all times and the pee flows out well when it happens. When I'm on a roll and having my small dribbling/spurt episodes I'm starting to pay less attention to it but at this point I still feel the flow start without resistance and staying unclenched as long as I can. Sort of like "oh it happened" paying it hardly any mind at all and move on immediately. When I'm unclenched after my voids, I go about my day walking, talking, working etc and am unaware if I have gone back into the "clenched" state or not because it's completely left my mind in the background. I'm excited to see what will happen because I'm thinking it's related to the "feel - think - do" cycle as outlined in the 12MDTP where my mind/body is trying to eliminate the "think" aspect of the process. I'm predicting over the next few months I will definitely just urinate with little warning or feeling in increasingly smaller amounts and will just about overcome the "think" aspect since there won't be much time to "think" about anything.

Another thing I've noticed is that if I'm laying down or doing my hypnosis - I have these little "twitch" like feelings in my bladder sort of like a fish is swimming around in there and slightly smacked it's tail against my bladder wall. It's not painful in any way but the only think I can imagine this to be is bladder spasms. They started around the second or third week of my diaper training. These are random and rarely occur when standing. If I sneeze or have a cough (which I recently got over a small sinus bug) I will spurt small amounts of pee.  **Read below in the BM section for an interesting tidbit**

Nothing much has changed in the terms of nighttime untraining. I will drink about 16 oz of water within 30 min - 1 hr of bedtime and wake up to almost a full bladder 1 - 2 times a night. I have to roll slightly or shift my legs a bit to pee but it starts. It's annoying to be woken up like this (when i already have a hard time sleeping being a night owl and all) but I see it as something awesome to look forward to. From what I've heard - once you start wetting in your sleep, you get the best sleep you've ever had in your life. I know it's a double edged sword and that once true bedwetting occurs as an adult it's near impossible to reverse, but for the price of having the best sleep ever and I'm willing to live with that.

BM's - They are controllable and no accidents HOWEVER I've noticed that by keeping my bladder muscles relaxed constantly, I will accidentally pass gas - even sometimes triggering some urine dribbling. As to the tidbit above, if my stool is loose or having a day of soft-serve or pudding-like consistency stool (essentially diarrhea) and I cough, I will either have a very audible fart or I will even expel a small amount of (semi-formed) stool into my diaper. Otherwise, nothing else noticeable or interesting to report on my BM's.

Well this is it for the update and please feel free to post suggestions or anything that you've experienced similar to me and maybe what I can expect at this point. Thanks again and stay diapered!

Hi Dpr Training how are you getting on. I'm about 3 months in and seem to experience many of the same symptoms as you, but unfortunately no BM issues yet - I wish!!

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  • 2 weeks later...

@DprTraining

How are things going in your journey? You seem to be on the fast track to become incontinent :)

Do you have a link or other directions on how effectively doing these reverse kegels? I guess, that by gulping water at your frequency is a way to remain relaxed?

 

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