Do you REALLY Want to become Diaper dependent?

[barbiejoanne]

As a former ABDL that is now incontinent, i will say the fun has worn off.  I remember the days of wondering what it would be like to be diapered 24/7, going a few weeks sometimes and then stopping and putting panties back on.  But as others have mentioned in this thread, once you loose all control over it, it takes you in a new direction.  My incontinence was due to a car crash and I am lucky to be alive and not have a colostomy bag as well.  I wear McKesson  Briefs Ultras for my everyday diaper, at night I add a booster to help lesson the chance of leaks.  However I still keep a rubber sheet under my fitted one because sometimes accidents happen. Sometimes if I want to wear something more form fitting i will go with a goodnights pull up (thankfully I can still fit in the XL size), but then I have to change even more frequently.

Due to the events, my coworkers know about my situation and no one bats an eye at work anymore.  However i can relate to some of the comments here about having to lug a diaper bag around, changing in public restrooms, walking out with a wet diaper in hand past a crowd of other women....or like last week at target, I was in the handicap stall when a little girl poked her head under just as I finished taping back up, I smiled at her and she scampered back to her mother and loudly announced to the entire room that they is a lady in there that wears diapers.  You could hear a pin drop (i hide in the stall for another 10 min hoping no one was still there).  But I also have had to give up some activities I use to enjoy, long hikes, and running are out as I chaff easily and it looses its fun.  I have to be careful sometimes with my wardrobe.  At home, where it is just me, I wear leggings all the time, but in public?  No.  Ok, now occasionally I will wear leggings with a pull up on wearing a sweater skirt in the fall or winter.

Now to 2 other things I have experienced that I don't think have been mentioned here. 

One is flying and TSA. I mentioned an experience on this board before about it before.  In short, never go though TSA with a wet diaper.  Every time I do,  and have to go through the body scanner, I get flagged, pulled to the side, patted down, asked to change and then re scanned (guess they are looking for diaper bombs, but I digress......)  I add an additional 30-40min just for this situation when arriving at the airport

The second is dating and having a love life as a middle aged woman that is incontinent.  I have met many a person in my Vanilla life that even when I am upfront about my situation, and they say they are fine with it, it turns out that they really are not when the relationship gets physical.  (imagine a nice romantic evening, things are going well and you end up in the bedroom, the crinkle of the rubber sheet....the fact that I leak/trickle at any moment.....I get it, its a lot to process) 

With that said, when dating (either a man or woman, I am bi), I want someone that loves me for who I am, not because I wear diapers.  I have a hard line between the fact I wear diapers, and looking for love and I don't want the 2 to cross.  I don't want the fetish lifestyle to dictate the relationship. Yes there are plenty of people that are into the fetish side of diapers, and I use to be one of them.  I don't see anything wrong with that.  I just want someone to love all of me.  It is tough, I have even broken a heart or 2 because of my hard stance on this.

So all that to say, I totally get the idea/fantasy of wanting to be diapered 24/7, but there are costs?  

Barbie

[DiaperedAllTheTime]

On 8/28/2018 at 7:40 AM, barbiejoanne said:

As a former ABDL that is now incontinent, i will say the fun has worn off.  I remember the days of wondering what it would be like to be diapered 24/7, going a few weeks sometimes and then stopping and putting panties back on.  But as others have mentioned in this thread, once you loose all control over it, it takes you in a new direction.  My incontinence was due to a car crash and I am lucky to be alive and not have a colostomy bag as well.  I wear McKesson  Briefs Ultras for my everyday diaper, at night I add a booster to help lesson the chance of leaks.  However I still keep a rubber sheet under my fitted one because sometimes accidents happen. Sometimes if I want to wear something more form fitting i will go with a goodnights pull up (thankfully I can still fit in the XL size), but then I have to change even more frequently.

Due to the events, my coworkers know about my situation and no one bats an eye at work anymore.  However i can relate to some of the comments here about having to lug a diaper bag around, changing in public restrooms, walking out with a wet diaper in hand past a crowd of other women....or like last week at target, I was in the handicap stall when a little girl poked her head under just as I finished taping back up, I smiled at her and she scampered back to her mother and loudly announced to the entire room that they is a lady in there that wears diapers.  You could hear a pin drop (i hide in the stall for another 10 min hoping no one was still there).  But I also have had to give up some activities I use to enjoy, long hikes, and running are out as I chaff easily and it looses its fun.  I have to be careful sometimes with my wardrobe.  At home, where it is just me, I wear leggings all the time, but in public?  No.  Ok, now occasionally I will wear leggings with a pull up on wearing a sweater skirt in the fall or winter.

Now to 2 other things I have experienced that I don't think have been mentioned here. 

One is flying and TSA. I mentioned an experience on this board before about it before.  In short, never go though TSA with a wet diaper.  Every time I do,  and have to go through the body scanner, I get flagged, pulled to the side, patted down, asked to change and then re scanned (guess they are looking for diaper bombs, but I digress......)  I add an additional 30-40min just for this situation when arriving at the airport

The second is dating and having a love life as a middle aged woman that is incontinent.  I have met many a person in my Vanilla life that even when I am upfront about my situation, and they say they are fine with it, it turns out that they really are not when the relationship gets physical.  (imagine a nice romantic evening, things are going well and you end up in the bedroom, the crinkle of the rubber sheet....the fact that I leak/trickle at any moment.....I get it, its a lot to process) 

With that said, when dating (either a man or woman, I am bi), I want someone that loves me for who I am, not because I wear diapers.  I have a hard line between the fact I wear diapers, and looking for love and I don't want the 2 to cross.  I don't want the fetish lifestyle to dictate the relationship. Yes there are plenty of people that are into the fetish side of diapers, and I use to be one of them.  I don't see anything wrong with that.  I just want someone to love all of me.  It is tough, I have even broken a heart or 2 because of my hard stance on this.

So all that to say, I totally get the idea/fantasy of wanting to be diapered 24/7, but there are costs?  

Barbie

What great details of your trials and tribulations of being incontinent.

Throughout the past there have been many posts about TSA, flying, and diapers here.  I personally travel for business about 70 percent of the year diapered permanently and interestingly enough I have not experienced the same bad luck that you have with TSA.  My diapers are typically wet and often times saturated particularly when coming back from an overseas trip.  It is almost impossible to find a restroom to change your diaper in before you clear customs and security for your domestic flight.  After a long flight unless I changed on the airplane my diaper is generally close to leaking.  Despite this I have never been flagged in a body scanner when connecting to other flights which honestly is quite shocking.

I have been flagged on multiple occassions when coming to the airport.  On four occasions out of hundreds of flights I have been asked to proceed to a private room and been instructed to to pull my pants down to prove that I am wearing a diaper.  Never once have I been asked to remove my diaper or change into a new one and clear security again.  

Perhaps the most embarrassing experience was being sent to a private room while wearing pink Rearz Princess diapers at the San Deigo Airport and two TSA agents made me pull my pants down and show them my diaper.  They were very courteous and respectful despite the laughs I am sure they all had afterwards.

Almost always the TSA agents feel bad about the situation and my pants are going right back up within seconds. 

My most through search was in Amsterdam.  The security officers there instructed me to pull down my pants and physically felt my diaper both front and back.  Afterwards they used a special metal detector labeled "for diapers".  I was wearing the original Fabine diapers and I was asked why I was wearing them.  My bag was also searched and they verified I had spare diapers.

Four out of hundreds of trips almost ALWAYS going through the body scanners.  I have been patted down I would say over a dozen times of which they typically find my diaper or see the waistband of it when I am not wearing a onesie.  They generally say nothing about it and send me on my way.

I will say that I think the layers I wear do have a part to do with why I am flagged so infrequently.  I wear a onesie and fixing panties which keep everything high and tight even with a soaked diaper.

 

[dyperbole]

2 hours ago, MarkSmith said:

What great details of your trials and tribulations of being incontinent.

Throughout the past there have been many posts about TSA, flying, and diapers here.  I personally travel for business about 70 percent of the year diapered permanently and interestingly enough I have not experienced the same bad luck that you have with TSA.  My diapers are typically wet and often times saturated particularly when coming back from an overseas trip.  It is almost impossible to find a restroom to change your diaper in before you clear customs and security for your domestic flight.  After a long flight unless I changed on the airplane my diaper is generally close to leaking.  Despite this I have never been flagged in a body scanner when connecting to other flights which honestly is quite shocking.

 

 

There are highly likely way more non-ABDL people with wet incontinence briefs / pads / pullups on planes after a long international flight than before a flight.  After one or two embarrassing incidents where a person is pulled to the side for a more thorough search, the person running the machine is likely told of the reason for the false positive.   The agent then likely can recognize future travelers with wet undergarments and know that they are harmless.   

Coming into an airport with a wet undergarment prior to travel is more suspicious, and may be considered a method to try to avoid the 3 ounce rule.

The vast majority of times I've traveled internationally and had to change planes after landing in the US, the only body screening I had was in the customs area.  Twice I've had to also go through a second screening once I left the customs area -- those were pains in the ass because I also had to carry my luggage out and have it checked in as if I was coming in off the street.  One was obviously due to the two airlines not being related to each other, but the other was an American Airlines flight connecting to another American flight (Thanks Miami Intl)

[DiaperedAllTheTime]

22 hours ago, dyperbole said:

 

There are highly likely way more non-ABDL people with wet incontinence briefs / pads / pullups on planes after a long international flight than before a flight.  After one or two embarrassing incidents where a person is pulled to the side for a more thorough search, the person running the machine is likely told of the reason for the false positive.   The agent then likely can recognize future travelers with wet undergarments and know that they are harmless.   

Coming into an airport with a wet undergarment prior to travel is more suspicious, and may be considered a method to try to avoid the 3 ounce rule.

The vast majority of times I've traveled internationally and had to change planes after landing in the US, the only body screening I had was in the customs area.  Twice I've had to also go through a second screening once I left the customs area -- those were pains in the ass because I also had to carry my luggage out and have it checked in as if I was coming in off the street.  One was obviously due to the two airlines not being related to each other, but the other was an American Airlines flight connecting to another American flight (Thanks Miami Intl)

I always go through security immediately after clearing customs in Minneapolis, Detroit, and Atlanta with body scanners.  I never thought about the screeners recognizing a used diaper and maybe that is why I am always cleared.  They literally have no restrooms generally before customs so they have to know it would be impossible to change. 

It is also amazing to hear how different secondary screening is between airports.  I have even had a TSA officer ask me how have I been searched in the past wearing a diaper because he had never experienced the situation...and he was the supervisor!  You would certainly think they would have training in dealing with diapers.  

[GhostGirl]

So... for you frequent flyers... why not just get TSA pre-screened instead of risking embarrassment? Yeah, people who flying once in a blue moon might have trouble getting pre-screened, but MarkSmith, if you fly as much as you say you do, and same to do based on the content of posts, why not just get Pre-screened?

I have flown four times in the last two months, 6 times if you go back 6 months, and the six month timeline includes international. Pre-screened for it all. The international flight, I was wear briefs, but I was still continent then, I was just travelling alone, and lets just say I have some issues with airport bathrooms. I was wearing the briefs until I could get on the plane and use its lavatory. 

The more recent flights, I couldn't stay dry by my choice... but in all the above cases, I was pre-screened so none of it mattered.

[DiaperedAllTheTime]

10 minutes ago, GhostGirl said:

So... for you frequent flyers... why not just get TSA pre-screened instead of risking embarrassment? Yeah, people who flying once in a blue moon might have trouble getting pre-screened, but MarkSmith, if you fly as much as you say you do, and same to do based on the content of posts, why not just get Pre-screened?

I have flown four times in the last two months, 6 times if you go back 6 months, and the six month timeline includes international. Pre-screened for it all. The international flight, I was wear briefs, but I was still continent then, I was just travelling alone, and lets just say I have some issues with airport bathrooms. I was wearing the briefs until I could get on the plane and use its lavatory. 

The more recent flights, I couldn't stay dry by my choice... but in all the above cases, I was pre-screened so none of it mattered.

You know I get asked that a lot and honestly majority of the time the security line is actually shorter in the regular line.  More and more people are getting TSA pre screened and often times at my home airport it is backed up.  Since I have Platinum/Maybe Diamond status this year, I always take the premium lane which puts you in front of everyone else.  The other problem is that I am never home so it is very difficult to actually schedule the interview.  Even when I think I may be home...emergency service in Japan.  I would literally have to take vacation just to insure I could make the interview with TSA and honestly my time off is preciously spent with my wife and children.

When I was younger and more immature there was a certain thrill going through airport security while diapered.  Although I am not that way now as wearing diapers all the time has taught me to be respectful of others around me maybe psychologically there is still an unconscious desire to still be "found out".  

Honestly it does not bother me.  I am pulled aside so infrequently that I just accept it when it does happen.  I also understand how to get through security without being flagged while diapered and as long as my diaper is dry I will never be pulled aside.  The times I have been I have been either lazy or just did not care I guess.

I have contemplated getting the Global Entry Card because I travel a lot to Mexico via car.  But guess what...you can not use it if you are driving a rental which of course I always am...I would have to wait in the border line anyway.

[Justmeinnh]

I fly from time to time, always diapered, often wet.  They see it on the scanner and ask if I have any “medical devices” on me, and I say yes, absorbent briefs for bladder problems.

They wand me and send me on my way. NBD.

[Skitunge]

On 8/23/2018 at 10:37 PM, Little Christine said:

Yes it is; because then you are not your own person, but a slave or addict to that on which you depend. psychological dependence is the easiet kind to defeat if you want to stop being a victim

I think that perspective is a bit too white and black. Humans are complex creatures with complex desires and some of us were created and shaped in childhood to have a lifelong "dependency" on diapers. Dependent meaning that a person can't really be completely happy or complete without indulging in diaper related activities.

I think of diaper and incontinence desires as a part of the upper parts of the infamous need pyramid.

I'm pretty sure that nobody in this thread would become a mental wreck without diapers, but I'm also pretty sure that quite a few would simply be a more unfulfilled and unhappy version of themselves. Some people have way more problematic and dangerous desires than a dependency on diapers out there, and I think it's one of the more mild desires you can wrestle with in your life. All in all it is ultimately a problem of "luxury" to consider oneself psychologically dependent on diapers for comfort. It's only in the last hundreds of years that we as humans have had the opportunity to develop and satisfy these kinds of needs instead of fighting for daily survival.

 

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

I am not commenting here on whether diaper attraction is good or bad. That is outside the scope of what I am responding to

I understand being "dependent" on something means that it bosses you around (theere are fancy psychological terms for it but I want to KISS)

First, you have not made the differentiation between a want and a need

Also, you have not differentiated between positive and negative affect. Dependency implies a negative affect and can be related to addiction in an addictive personality. Positive affect means you actually enjoy what you are doing

Also, you have not demonstrated that it MUST be diapers. This applies to any specific item as such. The treatment for "blindism"s relies on substition of actions. Blindisms are habits sccociated with being blind or of very low vision. They are, as of 19o75, believed to be a way to add a certain amount of stiulation to the system to bring it up to the minimum for useful function and replacing what would be visual stimulation. One such is rocking back and forth. Nw Stevie Wonder and I could get away with that because we're both musicians and it can be interpreted as "always feeling the beat". For someone else, most persons would find it off-putting. The Carroll Center, in Newton, MA used to teach people to get around that by substitution; training them to use less exotic forms of stimulating the brain, by using more widely practice "fidgets", like playing with keys or the like

Behavioral Psychology holds and has proved, that you are not bound irrevocably to things that happened in childhood. This was a pattern of "stimulus, integration, response, donsequences" Behavior modification uses the same algorithm to first remove the unwanted behavior(s) and then replace them with another or others. This is used quite a bit in sports to replace undesired responses to situations with better ones. In this sense Behavioral Psychology is more compatible with "free will" and client-centered therapies since, especially cognitive therapies, engage the client to understand the process of habit-formation and decide what the replacement behavior(s) are desired. In such therapies the client is the "mamoriaty stockholder" and knows nearly as much as the therapist who spend a semester or two learning all of this and how it worls. In short you're not "stuck" with a bad habit, which you decide is or is not a bad habit and you select its replacement and understnad the whole process. This was a major argument between the Behaviorists and Psychoanalysts

Beyond that. You negate the possibility of discussion. The concept of innate or instinctual behaviors must show that hte behavior occurs in the overwhelming bulk of the populace. Second innate psychological ANYTHING requires innate knowldege or ideas. Noam Chomsky attacked the notion in analizing B. F. Skinner's BEYOND FREEDOM AND DIGNITY saying "If everything is 'conditioned' then how can I be sure that [Skinner] was not simply conditions to hold that, and therefore it has no meaning?" Any idea of "innate" means you had or have no choice in how you get there so it has no meaning and discussion is pointless, as opposed to "tablula rasa [clean slate]". Behavior Modification, and especially  cognitive therapy. has been the most successful forms of psychotherapy

Dependency is always a bad thing because it ties you to that which you are dependent on. such as co-dependency and the like. This impairs your functionality

If you are trying to defned dependency why do you bring up "nobody on this threat would be a mental wreck without diapers"?

Your chart is used out of context. There are probably as many definitions of "self-actualization" as there are courses on it. I would argue that "dependency" is an impediment to self-actualization since it places something about yourself outside of your control

This is what I mean by "most of pop psyche is psychobabble"

[BedWetMark]

It's a tough one, sometimes I still think "absolutely yes, I'd love to wear nappies all day as well", but then the reality kicks in when I'm stood up presenting at work, commuting, or anything where I think I'd be noticed.

Wearing for need at night only at least means I can have my fill (pun intended) before I shower up and go to work.  When I work from home I'll sit around in a nappy all day, my wife doesn't overly mind as she's mostly at work too.  

But generally whilst I still think 24/7 is sometimes really appealing, I like having the daytime choice not to wear. I mean, it's bad enough having to sort out night time wearing when at (for example) a family member's house!

[DiaperedAllTheTime]

The bottom line becoming diaper dependant is simply not for everyone.  Many of us fantasize about the thought of diaper dependancy for a variety of different reasons but at the end of the day making it become reality is a long and complicated journey.  It took years of desiring to wear diapers permanently before I could actually be diapered permanently.  As a diaper lover it was almost impossible to keep a diaper on after having an orgasm.  I honestly believed that would never change.  Yet over time I was able to overcome this and now that I am diapered permanently I find myself in a much better place and I am a happier being.  

For most it is not something reality will allow.  Yet for some including myself, wearing diapers permanently and becoming diaper dependant makes our reality a much better place to be.

[Smash-N-Dash]

Short answer: no, I don’t want to become diaper dependent and have to physically rely on them.

Long answer: It ultimately comes down to what a lot of others have already said. Between the cost, the extra steps you have to take, the fact that it’s not reversible, and (for me) most importantly, diapering would probably be ruined for me, it’s better off for it to remain a fantasy.

Personally, the relationship I have with diapers and my ABDL side couldn’t be better right now. I only wish I could spend more time diapered, but it’s okay because I know there’s times where I’m just not in the mood to wear a diaper when I do have an opportunity to enjoy them.

For me, diapers are an escape from reality, a way to unplug from all of the stress and responsibility that we, as legal adults, go through. It’s such a relaxing and therapeutic feeling to come home from a long day at work and put on a diaper. My stress just exits my body (both figuratively and at times literally) right into the soft, comforting padding swaddling my body and doesn’t come back until the diapers come off. Literally, no amount of medication or therapy can ever be as soothing as a diaper snugly wrapped around my waist.

That’s just the thing, though. That temporary escape, for however long I choose and feel comfortable with, is just the perfect amount for me to really enjoy and love diapers. I feel that if I made the decision to go 24/7 and eventually completely dependent, that I’d lose the enjoyment I have with them, that I’d grow tired of them, only to come to terms with being stuck in a diaper for the rest of my life. 

I made the choice, much like a lot of us here, to explore and rediscover diapers because of what they are: they’re fun, they’re adorable, they’re special, they’re comforting, they’re soothing, they’re magical, and they’re a million and a half plus other positive things. I like my diapers just the way they are, so why ruin a good thing?

[ppdude]

On 4/10/2018 at 3:26 AM, Little Christine said:

I will stick to being a weekend warriorette, thank you

I had such great hopes for you .

[Little BabyDoll Christine]

21 minutes ago, ppdude said:

I had such great hopes for you .

So did Nurse Ratshit. But I have NO desire to be named "Pissy Chrissy"

[ppdude]

16 hours ago, Little Christine said:

So did Nurse Ratshit. But I have NO desire to be named "Pissy Chrissy"

Awww. We'd wouldn't call you that!!! Never EVER (at least for now).

[iluvmydiapers]

Yes

[Nat]

On 4/26/2018 at 10:33 AM, Spokane Girl said:

I only go through one diaper a day so I can wear the same diaper all day and I don't really need to change out in public. I still carry a spare one in my purse. I see this as a lifestyle. Instead of wearing underwear, it's diapers. Instead of using the toilet, it's my diaper. 

Lot of toilets do not have trash cans, it's usually the handicapped toilet that does. I have not seen any trash cans in stalls but sanitary napkin holders but those are too small to even hold an adult diaper. Though I have stuffed a Tena in one. I have thrown my diaper away in the trash can in the restroom. 

I've been wearing 24/7 for six years now thanks to the help of my husband. I have noticed changes in my bladder like how uncomfortable is it to hold it and when I have to do a number two, that also gets uncomfortable too and it really wants to come out and it happens at random times when I have to go. I messed myself while I was getting my son because I was out in the car and there was no toilet around. I wasn't going to leave my car unattended to rush in the building to go. I have also messed myself in public a few times too because of no toilet and I just wanted to get home than missing the commute train and having to wait for another one. This was Sunday in the evening when commute trains run less frequent. But this is what happens when you wear 24/7 and start peeing and pooping yourself, it starts to happen at random times and it starts to get uncomfortable to hold your urine. I also noticed my poop is softer now. They used to be hard and I always blogged up domestic toilets. I can also just relax and push it out and let it come out on its own now without having to squat. I also have to go more often too so my bladder never fills up before I feel I have to go. Most people don't feel it until it's at least 2 cups full. For me it's a lot less than that. I also can't pee in the toilet normal anymore without having to push the urine out. Instead it happens normal in a diaper like I am on the toilet. 

 

But I think this is all still worth it. 

[Inconito]

17 hours ago, Spokane Girl said:

I've been wearing 24/7 for six years now thanks to the help of my husband. I have noticed changes in my bladder like how uncomfortable is it to hold it and when I have to do a number two, that also gets uncomfortable too and it really wants to come out and it happens at random times when I have to go. I messed myself while I was getting my son because I was out in the car and there was no toilet around. I wasn't going to leave my car unattended to rush in the building to go. I have also messed myself in public a few times too because of no toilet and I just wanted to get home than missing the commute train and having to wait for another one. This was Sunday in the evening when commute trains run less frequent. But this is what happens when you wear 24/7 and start peeing and pooping yourself, it starts to happen at random times and it starts to get uncomfortable to hold your urine. I also noticed my poop is softer now. They used to be hard and I always blogged up domestic toilets. I can also just relax and push it out and let it come out on its own now without having to squat. I also have to go more often too so my bladder never fills up before I feel I have to go. Most people don't feel it until it's at least 2 cups full. For me it's a lot less than that. I also can't pee in the toilet normal anymore without having to push the urine out. Instead it happens normal in a diaper like I am on the toilet. 

 

But I think this is all still worth it. 

I'm having the same experience after more than 5 years being back in diapers 24/7, never holding back now means my bladder gets really uncomfortable when my bladder occasionly is holding back.

Surprise wettings are becoming more frequent as well.

But I'm loving the increasingly dependence on being diapered at all times. Yes, it requires planning, but it's well worth it for me.

 

[DiaperboyEddie12]

On 9/11/2018 at 11:15 AM, MarkSmith said:

The bottom line becoming diaper dependant is simply not for everyone.  Many of us fantasize about the thought of diaper dependancy for a variety of different reasons but at the end of the day making it become reality is a long and complicated journey.  It took years of desiring to wear diapers permanently before I could actually be diapered permanently.  As a diaper lover it was almost impossible to keep a diaper on after having an orgasm.  I honestly believed that would never change.  Yet over time I was able to overcome this and now that I am diapered permanently I find myself in a much better place and I am a happier being.  

For most it is not something reality will allow.  Yet for some including myself, wearing diapers permanently and becoming diaper dependant makes our reality a much better place to be.

How is your wearing full time coming along have not seen an update on you, Mark?  

[DiaperedAllTheTime]

Update tomorrow....one year in diapers....

[DiaperboyEddie12]

35 minutes ago, MarkSmith said:

Update tomorrow....one year in diapers....

Cool I can't wait to read it