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Being trans and liking diapers


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Im trans and when I first noticed I liked diapers I actually was really uncomfortable with it. 
For me I didn't think that somebody liking diapers was wrong, But because I was trans that I shouldn't like it because at that time when I put on a diaper it aroused me and I thought that was more or less wrong for me, I also didn't like that it would probably be considered a bit childish to like such things. 
But now it has been a long time and was able to get to a point where i'm oke with being aroused by things and I don't just get as aroused from wearing a diaper anymore in the first place (I do still like wearing one). 
And now I have big fondness for things that while I consider really cute might be considered a bit childish.
I do want to say I didn't think back then that woman or trans people having a fetish was wrong but because I had genitalia that i dont like I shouldn't get aroused by stuff.Partly the way that I got over it was by reading things other trans people wrote and seeing some that also liked diapers, and also I got pills that had the effect of lowering testosterone which made me a lot happier and more oke with all of it.

I would like to know if there are other trans people who also had similar problems like me when they first started to discover their fetish or realised they were trans.


P.s I apologize if my grammar isn't to great i do try but English is not my native language and even in my native language im not to great with grammar.

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I knew I was TG before I started wearing diapers. Interestingly, wearing girls/women's clothes never aroused me. Somehow diapers did at first. Perhaps because it seemed more taboo than being trans. However, it didn't last long,(a month?) I wear diapers 24/7 now; not because I have to but because I enjoy it. And my partner says I have to. Being trans doesn't mean that things that arouse you shouldn't. Unless you're on 'mones' and t blockers those parts you dislike are still going to work.

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Equating my ABDLness with my genderfluidity was never something I had a problem with, but I do remember being aroused every time I put on a diaper... EVERY. TIME. even if I didn't want to be aroused! I feel it was a thing where it was a matter of it still, in the recesses of my mind, feeling taboo, like it did when I was younger and stole diapers and wipes out of the diaper bags of my younger cousins. Once I was able to get over that block, recognizing these were my diapers and supplies that I bought for myself for my use and my use alone, it got better and I stopped getting aroused every time :)

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I'm far from the usual. I always knew my gender was wrong and I've always been attracted to diapers, though it all worked out strangely. Other than in thought I'd explored nothing till my mid teens when I found arousal and comfort (physical and emotional) in wearing panties. I also discovered that while my 'boy' undies were always damp (or worse) from my life-long bladder leakage, when in panties I had nary a dribble, so in my late teens panties became my daily wear and the arousal disappeared. Through to my mid 30's I did some further crossdressing occasionally, and acquired a drinking and drug problem. When I went to bed really drunk there were good odds that I'd wake up to a soaked bed so I experimented (badly) with home-made diapers as that was all I had access to. Late 30's my Trans feelings came to the fore-front and by then I'd quit the drugs but not the drinking. I wound up Transitioning and living full-time for two years except for at work where a male personna was necessary. Diapers were the furthest thing from my mind. Then clinical depression almost killed me. For other unrelated reasons it became clear that I couldn't sustain my transitioned life so it slowly faded away save for my underdressing. I also stopped drinking. Late 40's my bladder control became worse and I started wearing pads in my panties but in time that wasn't enough, so I wound up wearing diapers. At first there was some arousal but that quickly died and was replaced by as deep a self-satisfaction as I'd found in Transitioning, though not as a replacement for it. And that's where I am today, still deeply wanting to get back to life as a woman but unable to, and completely happy to wear only diapers.

On thinking it all through, I believe that my dryness in panties came about as part of my 'girl side' not wanting to 'dirty' myself or my clothes; sort of me becoming a 'big girl'. Their thinness also meant that I had to gain bladder control as one spurt was more than they could absorb. Now that I'm much older I can accept that diapers do not detract from being a woman in any way so there's no bad in my wearing them. Diapers are both a physical and emotional need which I would not change even if I could, and even if me returning to a transitioned life became possible again. Both are part of who I am ;)

Bettypooh

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  • 3 months later...

I wear diapers for a number of reasons but not because I have to. I have experienced a craving for diapers all my life. I become sexually aroused at just the thought of wearing a diaper. I have trouble integrating my gender confusion with wanting diapers. It just seems wrong. To make it even more confusing I am aroused by anything relating to bondage and or disipline. I hoped my twisted complicated sexuality would subside with old age. No luck yet. I'm still chronically craving incompatible fetishes and sexual experiences. 

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We're all twisted to some degree so don't let that bother you. While we are all made of many parts and wouldn't be whole without them all, that doesn't automatically tie them together. Sometimes they're different things in the same box and sometimes one can't be in that box without the other. Diversity and differences beat the heck out of plainness and boredom :whistling: Life is for living, so go live while you can because time will take that away from you if you wait too long!

Bettypooh

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I was into nappies before  I realised I was trans. I didn't realise until I was in my late teens.  The more I head down the path to transistion the weaker my little side becomes. But it will never probably disappear.......

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My whole sexuality is a big ol' mess... I repressed everything around my gender and my kinks well into adulthood while trying to force myself into the role of a cisgender heterosexual male, and all I did was give myself depression and anxiety issues. I finally came to terms with my gender a few years ago and transitioned, but I still have a ton of self-esteem and self-worth issues to work through, particularly in regards to my kinks and fetishes which I still carry a ton of shame around. Over the last couple of weeks I've finally begun to accept that I'm a DL and figure out where I fit there (no interest in AB stuff at all but I do enjoy wearing as a kink and a comfort thing, and I'll probably end up wearing 24/7 soon now that I've settled on a brand I like) so my hope is that if I can finally find some acceptance there that everything else will start to come a little easier.

I guess after typing all that out I have to admit it seems a little (a lot, actually) surprising that I was able to find acceptance so easily with being a transgender woman, which is a big, public, visible thing that you almost have to involve everyone in your life with, versus being a diaper lover which is something I don't really need to involve anyone else with outside of potential partners. I guess it's because one is widely understood and socially acceptable (to an extent) whereas the other is still considered deviant by the mainstream. 

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On 7/9/2018 at 4:29 AM, lily~nyan said:

My whole sexuality is a big ol' mess... I repressed everything around my gender and my kinks well into adulthood while trying to force myself into the role of a cisgender heterosexual male, and all I did was give myself depression and anxiety issues. I finally came to terms with my gender a few years ago and transitioned, but I still have a ton of self-esteem and self-worth issues to work through, particularly in regards to my kinks and fetishes which I still carry a ton of shame around. Over the last couple of weeks I've finally begun to accept that I'm a DL and figure out where I fit there (no interest in AB stuff at all but I do enjoy wearing as a kink and a comfort thing, and I'll probably end up wearing 24/7 soon now that I've settled on a brand I like) so my hope is that if I can finally find some acceptance there that everything else will start to come a little easier.

I guess after typing all that out I have to admit it seems a little (a lot, actually) surprising that I was able to find acceptance so easily with being a transgender woman, which is a big, public, visible thing that you almost have to involve everyone in your life with, versus being a diaper lover which is something I don't really need to involve anyone else with outside of potential partners. I guess it's because one is widely understood and socially acceptable (to an extent) whereas the other is still considered deviant by the mainstream. 

I think we have a lot in common.....

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  • 3 weeks later...
On 7/8/2018 at 11:29 PM, lily~nyan said:

My whole sexuality is a big ol' mess... I repressed everything around my gender and my kinks well into adulthood while trying to force myself into the role of a cisgender heterosexual male, and all I did was give myself depression and anxiety issues. I finally came to terms with my gender a few years ago and transitioned, but I still have a ton of self-esteem and self-worth issues to work through, particularly in regards to my kinks and fetishes which I still carry a ton of shame around. Over the last couple of weeks I've finally begun to accept that I'm a DL and figure out where I fit there (no interest in AB stuff at all but I do enjoy wearing as a kink and a comfort thing, and I'll probably end up wearing 24/7 soon now that I've settled on a brand I like) so my hope is that if I can finally find some acceptance there that everything else will start to come a little easier.

I guess after typing all that out I have to admit it seems a little (a lot, actually) surprising that I was able to find acceptance so easily with being a transgender woman, which is a big, public, visible thing that you almost have to involve everyone in your life with, versus being a diaper lover which is something I don't really need to involve anyone else with outside of potential partners. I guess it's because one is widely understood and socially acceptable (to an extent) whereas the other is still considered deviant by the mainstream. 

This is a mood. So much sexual repression and denial baggage. Let's just say my folks are pretty socially conservative and it did a number.

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On 8/1/2018 at 8:05 PM, YourFNF said:

This is a mood. So much sexual repression and denial baggage. Let's just say my folks are pretty socially conservative and it did a number.

My parents were pretty liberal and open-minded in most regards, except when it came to sexuality... there they were old-school religious all the way. And my mom was a firm believer in discipline through shaming and humiliation. :(

Also,

no interest in AB stuff at all


ahahahahahaha oh boy was I wrong about that ?

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  • 7 months later...

I went into diapers for bed wetting....  On that very first night, right after the lights went out I rubbed myself to climax.  At the very least I became a diaper lover.  When my aunt asked me to wear a nightgown for modesty to hide my diapers from my cousins I because a sissy diaper lover.  I was six and eight.  I have always felt sorry for boys raised so tightly that they could never appreciate what I've grown up with, and can't imagine a life without either.  This all happened while living a perfectly normal life otherwise....  To me it was the same management issues as balancing work and family.  One for bills, the other for thrills. 

 

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  • 4 weeks later...
On 3/9/2018 at 2:17 PM, 'Lil Wendi said:

I knew I was TG before I started wearing diapers. Interestingly, wearing girls/women's clothes never aroused me. Somehow diapers did at first. Perhaps because it seemed more taboo than being trans. However, it didn't last long,(a month?) I wear diapers 24/7 now; not because I have to but because I enjoy it. And my partner says I have to. Being trans doesn't mean that things that arouse you shouldn't. Unless you're on 'mones' and t blockers those parts you dislike are still going to work.

I also knew I was trans before being into diapers. There’s a weird dichotomy between those two aspects of my life. I would so love to be 24/7 and incontinent, but I also love wearing regular underwear. Being incontinent would take that (and so much more away). 

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  • 3 weeks later...

I'm a boy. That's just who I am, whether or not I have the right parts. Ken is still a man, even though his undies are empty, right? I just thought all girls secretly wanted to be boys, and felt their best when someone mistook them for one, right up until I said just that, and my family went "Uh, no." That's how much I took it for granted - that everyone felt this way, right? Because I'd never felt any different.

I can remember when I started liking diapers, however. It was a set time, a set day, and then it just never went away after that. I was... Four, maybe? Five? 

One is a fetish, the other is my identity and my personality and my feeling of self. I didn't know I was trans before I knew I liked diapers, because I didn't even know I was trans. They're very much separate. 

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 3/9/2018 at 12:17 PM, 'Lil Wendi said:

I knew I was TG before I started wearing diapers. Interestingly, wearing girls/women's clothes never aroused me. Somehow diapers did at first. Perhaps because it seemed more taboo than being trans. However, it didn't last long,(a month?) I wear diapers 24/7 now; not because I have to but because I enjoy it. And my partner says I have to. Being trans doesn't mean that things that arouse you shouldn't. Unless you're on 'mones' and t blockers those parts you dislike are still going to work.

Good call baby girl. I'm CD and full time abgirl..work with what u got

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There are lots of great stories here. Thank you everyone for sharing.

I didn't discover my love of diapers until well into my adulthood, a few years into my transition. When I first gave myself permission to engage in the girly things I didn't feel like I was allowed to have/do (I was really deeply closeted, and tried like heck to be a boy) it tapped me into my LG side. For the longest time I was sad that I didn't get to have a real little girl childhood, and this was my chance to explore it. I was into ageplay for years before I regressed small enough to consider diapers - when I was in middle space diapers weren't even a thought, but now I'm crazy about them!

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  • 2 weeks later...

I wanted to be put back into diapers and regressed before I really knew I was trans.

Of course I wanted to be a baby girl cause the outfits were so cute.

Now that I’ve accepted myself as a gender fluid trans women my diaper and AB desires are back a bit after going away.

I think part of the reason is my divorce 1 year ago and it has brought on feelings of rejection and that always seems to trigger my AB side

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I became very interested in baby things around the age of 6 or 7.  I knew that as a boy baby things were not something I was suppose to be interested in.  I remember advertisements for dolls that wet their diapers and I wanted one, but couldn't.  I remember once my aunt asking if I wanted to learn how to change my cousins diaper and I really wanted to, but instead I acted all grossed out and ran away.

I started with just wanting to be in diapers around the age of 7.  From diapers it was pacifiers and bottles, then bibs.  None of these things were gender specific to me, just baby things.  Eventually I wanted a bonnet, a big frilly lacey baby bonnet and that's when I realized that I wanted to be a babygirl.  

Fast forward 25 years or so and transgender and gender fluid is starting to become more mainstream.  I like to wear women's clothing but it feels very different to me then wearing babygirl clothes and diapers.  I just like the female clothes better, they just seem more appropriate to me, while the diapers and babygirl clothes give me that special feeling of helplessness, specialness and cuteness.  

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  • 1 month later...

Interestingly enough despite always having a diaper fetish I became a sissy really on accident.  I had a job where at the time I believed it was impossible for me to wear diapers.  I had issues with anal leakage and my wife suggested I use a maxipad to help prevent my mess from getting in my boxers.  Maxipads do not work so well with boxers so I borrowed a few pairs of her plain white panties.  Before long I was buying my own panties that where in very feminine colors, materials, and prints.  I started washing with feminine smelling soaps and even spraying feminine deodorant spray on my girl parts.  I was hooked.  Now I am a complete sissy.  I no longer wear panties because I am diapered permanently but I wear very girly diaper covers.

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Always liked nappies, even before being attracted to girls stuff and knowing i was trans. Is a fetish aspect to them but its more that i feel more comfortable in them just like being more comfortable being feminine. Just another aspect of me i guess

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