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Do your kids know about your diapers?


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If you are incontinent, the answer is pretty obvious. But what about if you don't have a medical condition, what do you tell them when they find out and ask you about it? Or do you just dodge the question?

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I told mine but they where old enough to understand about fetishes.My son was twenty and my daughter was sixteen there comment simply was whatever floats your boat enjoy it,that was the end of the discussion.

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never told mine how i feel i live on my own but i wont want to tell them for now about my baby side they already now about my crossdressing.

 

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My kids are adults now.   My daughter made one crack when she was a teen that led me to believe she had figured it out.   Never heard anything from my son.

 

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If you are incontinent, the answer is pretty obvious. But what about if you don't have a medical condition, what do you tell them when they find out and ask you about it? Or do you just dodge the question?

The question would be how would they know if you are incontinent or not?  If you were caught what would be the lesser evil?  Explaining to your kids that you are an adult baby or a diaper lover could be very confusing for a child.  Or do you not tell them the truth and blame it on control issues.  I am a very honest person but when it comes to diapers and my kids it may be a lie I have to tell.  I remember my stepdaughter found one of my wife's dildos when she was younger and she asked what it was....my wife embarrassingly exclaimed a car part and pulled it from her hands.  It was a natural reaction to a stressful situation.  Now my wife I consider a very honest person but when faced with that question she lied her ass off.  In my situation with diapers it is different I suppose.  Since I have been wearing diapers for so long I have been experiencing the onset of mild incontinence.  So if I was caught and I said I have control issues it would not be a lie.  Of course I would never tell them I untrained myself.  I know you have kids, what do you think you would do?

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The question would be how would they know if you are incontinent or not?  If you were caught what would be the lesser evil?  Explaining to your kids that you are an adult baby or a diaper lover could be very confusing for a child.  Or do you not tell them the truth and blame it on control issues.  I am a very honest person but when it comes to diapers and my kids it may be a lie I have to tell.  I remember my stepdaughter found one of my wife's dildos when she was younger and she asked what it was....my wife embarrassingly exclaimed a car part and pulled it from her hands.  It was a natural reaction to a stressful situation.  Now my wife I consider a very honest person but when faced with that question she lied her ass off.  In my situation with diapers it is different I suppose.  Since I have been wearing diapers for so long I have been experiencing the onset of mild incontinence.  So if I was caught and I said I have control issues it would not be a lie.  Of course I would never tell them I untrained myself.  I know you have kids, what do you think you would do?

MarkSmith that's a great way, but how do you explain your  pink diapers and sissy outfits. No matter how careful one thinks they are kids snoop and sooner or later we all drop our guards. Being discovered wearing a diaper by your kids or your kids discovering your diapers is one thing and easy to explain away as having a medical need for them......but pink sissy looking diapers? Well thats a conversation I like to be a fly on the wall for.

My kid might know but I've never told. My kid was raised to respect ones personal space and has always done that. 

My kid is now 23 and still lives at home but if the topic ever came up (which I seriously doubt it ever would) I would kindly ask to drop the subject and knowing the respectful child I my wife and I raised the subject would be dropped. End of discussion.  My kid can draw their on conclusions. 

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MarkSmith that's a great way, but how do you explain your  pink diapers and sissy outfits. No matter how careful one thinks they are kids snoop and sooner or later we all drop our guards. Being discovered wearing a diaper by your kids or your kids discovering your diapers is one thing and easy to explain away as having a medical need for them......but pink sissy looking diapers? Well thats a conversation I like to be a fly on the wall for.

My kid might know but I've never told. My kid was raised to respect ones personal space and has always done that. 

My kid is now 23 and still lives at home but if the topic ever came up (which I seriously doubt it ever would) I would kindly ask to drop the subject and knowing the respectful child I my wife and I raised the subject would be dropped. End of discussion.  My kid can draw their on conclusions. 

My situation would be much more difficult with the diapers I wear I suppose.  I do wear plain white diapers sometimes to work (ABU Simples or Rearz In+Control) but honestly if I was ever caught it would be more than likely in a pink diaper.  I have left a used diaper in the bathroom closet before when I was showering and forgot about it.  My wife found it and I was scolded.  As for my sissy outfits they rarely come out of the locked box they are kept in so it would be much more less likely to ever be caught.  

My older kids know I was severely abused by my stepmother and they know she used humiliation as a form of that abuse.  They do not know that the threat of diapers were involved but it would not be so hard to sit them down and explain why I became an ABDL.  My stepdaughter is bisexual and she would be a lot more understanding I imagine.

The problem in our household would be with my six year old.  I am not sure how that would be explained.  If he found a white diaper it would be explained as a control problem and if he found a pink one it may be explained the same way.  The great thing in my household is I am on business 75% of the year and when I am home my wife and I act as a team to keep my diapers hidden.  I guess this helps to mitigate the risks in a way.

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Personally, if my kids found a diaper, it would be a plain institutionalized diaper.  I wear prevail, Attends, McKessons, and whatever they have at the Goodwill or local thrift stores.  First, I'm almost 60 and it would be easier for people to believe that an overweight type 2 diabetic who has kidney problems and gets up 6 times a night to use the bathroom might have some urinary control problems.  Secondly, at my age my kids would be in their 30's and adults and out on their own. Thirdly, I don't have any kids (that I am aware of) so it's a moot point anyway.  Last, and most important, I see no reason to discuss my underwear with other people, especially my kids.  They don't tell me about their underwear so why should I?  If I had younger kids in the 8 year old range who found my diapers, it would be my fault first of all for not keeping them in a secure place where they couldn't be found!  What if it was a gun instead of diapers that my 8 year old found and got his hands on?  Should the worst happen and a younger kid did find my diapers, I could make up an excuse, such as someone I work with's grandmother passed away and I told him I would donate some of her things to the goodwill next time I go there.  Sure, a teen wouldn't believe it but an 8 year old would.  With teens I could fabricate a better reason for them being around.  At my age if my grown kids happened to find out, such as if they were house sitting, feeding the dog or watering the plants while I was on vacation, they would first have to admit to snooping around the house to find my diapers, and if they were bold enough to admit they were doing something they shouldn't have been doing, I could say, "None of your business, but a while back I had a prostate issue and needed to use pads for a couple weeks.  Those are just what's left."  Bottom line is I'm very careful about keeping my diapers where other's can't find them and if I slip up, it's my own fault.  If I had kids, especially kids under age 20 living with me, I better damn well make sure there is no way they can get to, see or find my diapers!

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Personally, if my kids found a diaper, it would be a plain institutionalized diaper.  I wear prevail, Attends, McKessons, and whatever they have at the Goodwill or local thrift stores.  First, I'm almost 60 and it would be easier for people to believe that an overweight type 2 diabetic who has kidney problems and gets up 6 times a night to use the bathroom might have some urinary control problems.  Secondly, at my age my kids would be in their 30's and adults and out on their own. Thirdly, I don't have any kids (that I am aware of) so it's a moot point anyway.  Last, and most important, I see no reason to discuss my underwear with other people, especially my kids.  They don't tell me about their underwear so why should I?  If I had younger kids in the 8 year old range who found my diapers, it would be my fault first of all for not keeping them in a secure place where they couldn't be found!  What if it was a gun instead of diapers that my 8 year old found and got his hands on?  Should the worst happen and a younger kid did find my diapers, I could make up an excuse, such as someone I work with's grandmother passed away and I told him I would donate some of her things to the goodwill next time I go there.  Sure, a teen wouldn't believe it but an 8 year old would.  With teens I could fabricate a better reason for them being around.  At my age if my grown kids happened to find out, such as if they were house sitting, feeding the dog or watering the plants while I was on vacation, they would first have to admit to snooping around the house to find my diapers, and if they were bold enough to admit they were doing something they shouldn't have been doing, I could say, "None of your business, but a while back I had a prostate issue and needed to use pads for a couple weeks.  Those are just what's left."  Bottom line is I'm very careful about keeping my diapers where other's can't find them and if I slip up, it's my own fault.  If I had kids, especially kids under age 20 living with me, I better damn well make sure there is no way they can get to, see or find my diapers!

Completely agree with you Sir.  It is absolutely the responsibility of the parent to keep a diaper fetish hidden at all costs.  Thankfully I have a loving and accepting wife that polices after me when I have a moment of weakness.  My wife and I are a team when it comes to my diapers and I have had diapers in my house for nine years and as far as I know none of the children are aware they are in our home despite wearing 24/7 (Although just for the last six months) .

 

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I don't have kids yet, but I've had the issue of what to say about ABDL diapers vs. "Regular" diapers come up before and here is how I handled it.

Whenever I need to talk to somebody about why I'm wearing a diaper and I'm not able or interested in telling them that I'm ABDL or whatever, I tell them I have control issues and diapers are much easier to deal with than wet pants. Everyone gets that, and I've never had anybody say anything negative. On the contrary, everyone is understanding and supportive. I've done this with over a dozen people and more than half the time they then tell me about a friend or relative that wet the bed for a long time, or also has to wear diapers, or how they have thought about it themselves at some point.

If they saw the diaper, and wondered about the cute prints, I explain it like this. I'm married, and my wife is obviously aware of the issue. Everyone agreed that there isn't anything sexy about a man in a diaper, and there just isn't ever going to be. So we decided instead to try and have some fun with it and to just not take it so seriously. So we went with cute. Cute is better than nothing, and my wife prefers cute diapers to "hospital diapers" (wife was a nurse and has diapered plenty of folks). It works for her and it works for me... we are both able to laugh about it and at least try to have some fun with it this way. And I also add this - these cute diapers are FAR better than most diapers out there, trust me I know. Depends completely suck! - which usually gets a laugh.

I'm not sure how that would play with your own child. My thinking is that if they are really young, it won't occur to them that cute diapers are anything but normal. I have a hard time seeing a 4 year old saying "I get you have control issues, but why THOSE diapers?" And if they are old enough to know better, they are probably not going to ask. And at the end of the days kids do understand when you tell them something is a private matter for mom and dad.

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No kids (yet) but I have issues keeping kids in the loop.  Going to be hard to believe I'll ever tell them.  Just don't want to mess with their heads and quite honestly, I can't see how it wouldn't lol

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  • 4 months later...

I have 3 adult children. My eldest daughter knows I wear and knows I’m ABDL. She also knows I have a fetlife account because she’s the one that told me about fet and got me to join. Her younger sister is a nurse in a Urology office in a major regional hospital. She also knows I have control issues first hand as I was only 2 traffic lights from home and knew I wasn’t going to make it and asked her to fish a large empty to go cup from the back floor of the car and I used that at a light. I saw it as the lesser of two evils. My son I’m sure was told by his mother about my fetish but has probably forgotten about it over the years. Either way all three of my children love me so it doesn’t matter.

Hugs,

Freta

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My husband Don's late wife Jean was only 52 when she started to lose bladder control in 1986. At that time their older children were 24 and 22. Their younger son was 9 and of course living at home. After a few months of urinary incontinence Jean informed all of them that about her condition. She never told any of them that she was using AB as a coping strategy. Then Jean was killed by a drunk driver in March 1988.

I met Don in May 1991. He admitted that his daughter is 4 months older than me. All of my step-kids know I have no bladder control.

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Seem like a simple question maybe not so simple to answer. Not unlikely some of the members will jump on my case, but what the heck, this is how I feel and approached the matter of me wearing diapers. To get back to the question of the OP, my kids know I wear diapers and as far as I can tell they seem to have no problems with it. I wear 24/7. As a matter of fact they were raised with the knowledge “dad wears diapers” and they realize / know it is a private thing. The knowledge they have is not forced upon them in any way, they were simply raised knowing dad wears a diaper. I suppose the same thing would apply if I would be incontinent and had to wear diapers in order to deal with my incontinence, I really doubt you can hide it indefinitely therefore I’d rather be open about it, yet discreet. Every so now and then they do ask questions which I will answer without telling lies. I belief if you start telling lies you will have to keep it up for the rest of your life, and I feel lies like cancer grow. Fixing lies may very well result into a breach of trust, in my opinion not worth it. Aside of that it may help them in the future to be open minded towards other people.

For me wearing diapers is not a fetish or a sexual thing, it is just that I wear diapers. I consider it special underwear and I am decent with it and not confronting. I use a medical type of diaper so I have no issues explaining why there are childish prints all over the diaper, I like white diapers. Furthermore I have no AB tendencies whatsoever, so they will never find any AB related stuff.  Wearing diapers help me deal with stress related problems, I feel more at ease, less stressed and above all complete. For sure adult diapers are basically meant to deal with incontinence, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be used or do not help with other health issues, like mental ones. I admit I wear diapers for my mental wellbeing so by taking care of my mental issues / wellbeing I’m both taking care of me and my family as well and this most definitely includes taking care of my children. Being a single dad I get the job done. My children love me, I love them more than you can imagine and that is what matters to me. In the light of that, wearing diapers seem to be quite trivial. I do no longer approach the fact that I wear diapers out of a sense of shame or feel the need to bend over backwards to hide it.

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Agreed.  I wear them.  I told my boys I wear them and that it is a private issue that I deal with to keep moving on in life.  We all have to share a bathroom, so the large trash can full of diapers (that I empty each day), various ointments and power, and stack of diapers/boosters are in a cabinet but not really hidden from sight.

If you do not treat it as something odd, most kids just shrug their shoulders and move on to the next round of "game of the week" on the playstation.

 

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I have 4 children and to my knowledge, NONE of them know about my need for diapers or that i wear. I keep just enough diapers to last about two weeks in our home, the rest are stored in a dry loft over our two car garage. My diapers are kept in a locked storage closet in our room that is under our bed. It looks just like a regular bed frame but is actually a huge storage spot that is hinged and locked at all times. 

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Question for joemama, iluvmydiapers and dlnoir. What age did you tell your kids? PM me if you don't want to share here. I've got my first kid on the way and will need to figure this out eventually.

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Drop the diapers and think of the question generically. When kids ask any question your answer is tailored to their age, ability to understand, their maturity, and to how the thing in question is dealt with socially. A three year old girl doesn't need to know everything about her vagina yet, so you limit what you answer with a focus on it being a private matter which generally isn't spoken of. At any point, saying that you have a problem with your body and that you need diapers is likely good enough. And it's true- we all have some kind of problem even if it's just a bruise and we all need diapers emotionally or physically. No lies and not intentionally deceiving to harm, but rather giving the answer which at that moment is best for the child. And you do that with everything. 

Agreed that discretion is needed here, as you want them to learn about privacy and how you shouldn't speak openly about some things in greater society, as well as the ways private things are spoken of socially when that must happen. Your job as a parent is to give your children the best set of living skills that you can through whatever non-harmful methods do that best, even if those methods might be questionable from certain viewpoints. Whatever is best for them is what you do. And you'd better plan on them eventually finding all your secrets and asking questions about that and anything because they probably will. You're going to lie to your kids about Santa and the Tooth Fairy so this is really no different when all this is done for the good of the child. Keep that as the focus and everything will be fine.

Bettypooh

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Agreed Bettypoo! And that is kind of my philosophy too... deal with it as needed and as appropriate. My issue isn't knowing what to say, I'm not really worried about that. What I'm wondering, is around what age is it likely to come up? I'm not worried about the issue getting raised by a 1 year old toddler. But I'm sure by 10 it will have. I just don't know how kids work well enough to know when the conversation might happen. Is a 2 year old going to notice and ask? Or is there no chance before, say, age 5? Obviously discression will play a huge role in the answer. But I don't have a choice about wearing a diaper at night, my wife doesn't like waking up in wet sheets and I don't either! If the kid has a bad dream and wants to crawl into bed with us at some point they will notice.  I just don't know when that will be.

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Absolutely not. It's not important to my young family to know how I go to toilet (or not!) at night.  As far as they are concerned, I'm helping them out of that stage of their lives themselves and we don't do that as adults.

Of course when they grow up further, they will realise that not everyone is the same and that's a different discussion.  But there is no need to know!

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@Mr. Sea Otter

I’ve been wearing diapers ever since the age of four years old, by choice that is. For the last twenty years I’ve been wearing 24/7. My children are much younger that and they we raised with the knowledge that dad wears diapers. When they got older and started to ask questions I gave them answers in a way they could understand and made sense to them, I never told them lies. I have no indication it bothers them at all and like “Joemama” said: my kids pay no attention to it and just shrug their shoulders and go on with their everyday business. I do not flaunt my diapers but I do not bend over backwards to hide them either. If they go in to my bed room and they open a certain closet where I store my diapers, cloth diapers and plastic pants it is in plain view. At least I’ll never shock them and confront them with a unpleased surprise. I truly belief I cause them no harm or put them under unnecessary strain. For me there is nothing sexual to it, it is just a special kind of underwear, I know they feel that way too for that is how they are thought and raised.

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