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Would you want to be a "Normie"?


How much guilt have you felt over your time with diapers? How did you deal with it?  

73 members have voted

  1. 1. If you could go back to a "normal" life - no diapers, no fetishism - would you? Would you want to be a "normie"?

    • Yes!
    • No!
    • I don't know how to answer that. I'm still trying to figure it out.
    • If being "normal" means a life without diapers in it, count me out!


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How much guilt have you felt over your time being into diapers? How have you dealt with it?

Edited by tom49461
Topic and title didn't match. Had to resubmit.
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If I just answered this without giving it any real thought I would probably say yes, however I am not that type. Hence as I think about it, no, I wouldn't give them up if I could, because I know that something else, perhaps something even more costly or more dangerous would have to take the place of diapers.

I have dealt with guilt in the past, but I feel that this was due to my upbringing. Once I realized that there could be much more hazardous things that I could be into or that could take the place of my enjoying diapers any guilt left. This is a part of me, it is not who I am & I am okay with this.

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I haven't had any real guilt (small bouts of asking myself "what am I doing?" but they never last long) about being an AB/DL. Thus I don't think that I would want to get rid of it completely. The key word being completely. I would definitely not mind it being slightly less pronounced.

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Honestly, not having a “need” to wear diapers, would make my life easier. I have wrestled with guilt from wearing diapers since I started actually wearing diapers again as an adolescent. The guilt would get so bad that I would convince myself there was something wrong with me, vow to never wear diapers again, and then throw out all of the supplies I had. Like a pendulum in motion I would end back up acquiring diapers and using them... rinse and repeat with the guilt. This continued for a while into my early 20s. Eventually I just accepted the point that this is a part of my life, and no matter what I do, I’ll still have an urge for some reason to wear and use diapers. After accepting that, the guilt is gone. So I was able to rid myself of the pesky guilt by a combination of being more mature than previously, and accepting the DL inside of me. Diapers don’t rule my life, and I feel I have a healthy relationship with my desire to wear, or a good balance rather. The only reason why I would say that if I could rid myself of my diaper desires, would be that even though I’m okay with it, due to societal standards, this practice of wearing diapers is very taboo and if caught, ya have a lot of ‘splanin to do! 

 

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I answered yes. If it was possible, this kink of being a DL would be out of my life in a heartbeat especially if I could go back to the beginning when it all started. 

Here's how I coped with being a DL.

Growing up in the 70s and 80s was a very trying time. It was before the internet and social media and  no understanding whatsoever of why I was afflicted with the want and desire to wear diapers like a baby. This had made my life miserable.  I was withdrawn, made me socially awkward and a recluse.  I had no friends and I had no desires to have any for fear of them finding out my secret. As far as girlfriends that was not even a thought. Other boys my age were dating and I was hiding in the woods longing to never be found. I just wanted to disappear from everyone. 

The sneaking of buying,  stealing and stashing diapers was just another stone on the pile of my life, a stone that added even more weight that held me down from being something more. 

Being  a DL basically disabled me as a chlid and adolescent.   It was something I had no control over. It wasn't the embarrassment it was more the fear of being found out that disabled me socially. I was already being bullied relentlessly in school, which started in grade school and continued til I turned 18 when signed my own papers to quit. I'm not saying that was the smartest move I made but I will say I became much happier afterwards. I no longer had to deal with the bullies and that was one place that my fears of being discovered was gone for good. 

After leaving high school I put all my focus into doing what I loved best and that was working, and I worked.  There isn't one employer in my past that could give me a bad reference. This made me feel good about myself. Although diapers were still part of my life I wasn't living in as much fear of being discovered. I had for the first time in my life some sort of purpose. 

I eventually went back to school and earned my GED then made the best decision of my life. At 20 yrs old I joined the military. Although diapers followed me through the military but for the first time in my life I had structure and learned to be sociable and how to properly balance my life. I was truly happy for the first time and it felt so good. I  served 3 yrs active and 5 yrs reserve. I was an outstanding soldier. And expert shot, highly decorated, received my rank in half the time that most took to get theirs, and was highly respected by my ranking NCOs and commanding officers. 

Today I could take it or leave it. I am no longer consumed by the intrusive thoughts of wanting  to wear or why I want to wear a diaper. I don't wear everyday and I have no desire to. Sometimes the mood just strikes me.

 

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This is not an issue for me, or anyone who understands the term "private life". I function normally (as much as anyone with a severe visual disability can, and better than most; my LG aspect has never been a problem for me) in the world at large. It is just one more thing of many that I compartmentalize, which msot persons do as a matter of course, You are different at work than at home; different at home than out and about. Not to the point of unrecognizability, your core persona is the same, just the context-based areas are modified to suit the situartion. Musical events just do not have the enviromental cues or "triggers" for my LG persona to operate. There are musical aspects to being part fairy, things like the glass flute and dulcichord but that stays there

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Keep in mind the reason we all enjoy wearing diapers, being AB or DL is because our brains are wired for this fetish somehow, often in ways we can't explain how or why  It's the same for people who have a foot fetish or rubber fetish.  I once read from someone with a rubber fetish that he would walk across a busy road if someone on the other side had a rubber raincoat just so he could brush up against it.  We might think that's really weird, but look how many people really think we are weird or perverted for being adults and wanting to wear diapers and wet ourselves.  Some people are child molesters and pedofiles and that is totally disgusting, but I'm sure they didn't ask for their brains to be wired that way, same as I didn't ask for a diaper fetish.  It's very hard for me to even talk about this because child molesters are the scum of the earth, doing that to innocent kids and even killing them sometimes.  If one of them did anything to a child of mine, they better hope the police get to them before I do.  Having a strong diaper fetish most of my life makes me realize these pedofiles probably have a similar mix up in their brains but instead of diapers, foot fetishes or other things, they have this lust and desire to molest children.  They can't help it and can't stop.  That doesn't make it any less terrible, but I bet if a similar question was asked of them, would they say, "No, I love molesting kids and enjoy it!"  Probably because they don't understand it's a deep down desire in their brains they can't control.  I do think some of them would say, "My God!  If I could stop doing this I surely would!"  It's because we all have fetishes for different things.  Granted, the answer from most people is, "No, I wouldn't give up my diapers or this lifestyle if I had a chance to because I enjoy it so much".  The only reason we all enjoy it so much is because of the fetish we all have for it.  If we never had that fetish in the first place, we wouldn't enjoy it or want to wear diapers and would probably feel like others do, that adults who wear diapers and wet themselves are perverted.  Therefore, I say yes, I would rather not have this fetish that life has dealt me if I had the choice.  I don't have that choice so I will continue to enjoy wearing and using my diapers keeping a good healthy balance between diapers and the rest of my normal life.  If I could totally be done and over with the fetish, I would.  It's the fetish that makes us all desire diapers. 

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That's just pop psych

Behaviiour Modification has destroyed determinism repeatedly, and brain "plasticity", used in stroke recovery therapy, has put a dent in "hard-wired" theories. Bey 1973, the concept of "control areas" of the brain, like "speech contro centerl" had been replace by "areas associated with [like speech]". Also, current theories of addiction center around responsiveness to dopamine, which is associated with "reward-based systems". Beyond all of this. ifi it were true, no amount of advice not to do anything stupid would make a bit of difference since stupid would be built into you. So I must reject the hard-wired determinism. Your brain can be constructed to be better or worse at skills, as it is said that the female brain is hard-wired to be better with the use of lnaguage, but that is different from saying that behaviours are hard-wired. In fact "biological determinism" fell by 1975, to be replaced by "bioligical fit"

Besides which, if you want to use the "I can't help it, I'm not in control of my behavior" thing, there are planty of people who will take you up on it: Big BioBrother is Watching

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I wouldn't give up wearing nappies now. I have adjusted my life to being incontinent and dependant on them. Whats more I am thoroughly and unashamedly DL now. I for one am truly happy in nappies.

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When i was first getting awar of wanting to wear diapers i did want to get rid of those feelings but since then i have accepted that its oke and now i dont really want to get rid of those feelings.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I voted "yes", but that vote comes with considerable qualifications.  To be a "normal" person, the triggering event(s) that caused me to become a DL would never have happened and my life would have undoubtedly followed a much different path where diapers played no role except for changing them on the children I may have had.  In that case, my vote would be "yes".

To suddenly have no desire to wear diapers at this point in my life while still remembering everything in my past, not to mention the fact that I've been incontinent for over five years, my vote would be "no."

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No, I actually need them now though, but even if I didn't I'd still prefer them over being "normal". Besides, this is normal for me, it's people that don't wear diapers that are not normal. After all, we've all seen public restrooms, filthy unsanitary places.

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  • 1 month later...

Yes plain and simple yes. I have accepted the fact that i wear and use diapers. But I was rather old when I found out I wasn’t the only one in the world with this strange desire. I caused me a lot of pain and a lot of issues accepting and figuring out what the heck it was and what consequences it had on my life. No if I was given a choice diapers wouldn’t be a part of my life

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Not sure what being "a normie" is & if such people really exist.
But yes I'd give this fetish a miss if I had the choice because it does tend to be isolating & put a barrier of secrecy between myself & others.
Thankfully its non-violent & harmless & doesn't involve me in forcing anyone to do anything against their will. I could have ended up with a lot worse.

 do

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I voted no because there is no such thing as "normal" in the world. Every person on this Earth that has an understanding of sex more than likely has some kink or fetish that they indulge in from time to time or even as a lifestyle choice so "normal" is being a person with a kink or fetish and I happen to super like this one.

If I were a person that was unwilling or unable to separate the fetish from everyday life to the point where it cost me jobs or relationships then I might have a different answer, but as things stand right now, no.

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What is this "normal" of which you speak?

All joking aside, the definition of normal has always eluded me. Normal as compared to what or to whom? It seems to me one can always find outliers in any sort of set or subset of an aggregation of things or persons.

As far as the whole DL thing goes, I look at it as a sort of bohemian life style. Eccentricity is a little too broad and implies more than I mean. Festish just sounds like on the border of mildly pathological; an invitation for a headshrinker to get her hooks into one and create a situation looking for a problem.

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Not sure I can even imagine that. Like the whole 'what is it like to be a bat?' question (google it). If I was 'normal', being so would mean I was so far removed from being the 'me' that currently exists, that there wouldn't be the same 'me' there to experience being it... Or, to put it another way, the me that's me here and now would utterly shudder at the thought of cheerfully trotting off to the bathroom half a dozen times a day with utter casualness. But the normal someone who was completely at ease with that would probably shudder just as hard at the thought of casually wearing a diaper to do their business. If one became the other, so much would have to change about their wiring that it's hard to imagine what was left would count as 'me' any more.

Much as I can see the pragmatic utility in no longer wanting to wear diapers therefore, and certainly in not being irrationally repulsed by the W.C. - I wouldn't be prepared to go through a process of self destruction in order to achieve that. I wouldn't give myself a lobotomy, or rewrite my personality to do so; it would feel like committing suicide and replacing my very SELF with someone else. So no - I wouldn't want to become 'normal' at that price. Not at a fingerclick, anyways. Perhaps if it was something more repellent, though, or actively harmful - there would be an argument for gradual training and reshaping, of the kind where one only realised after the process how much one had surely but steadily changed. But nothing about diapers has ever troubled me enough to motivate that to the extent of complete normalisation (much as I certainly have improved in my needs and tolerance since my younger days - so I suppose I must already have experienced this to some extent).

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