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Potty Training


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So far I’ve pushed my memory horizon back to age two, plus or minus a month or so.  I seem to have run into a ‘brick wall’ at that point and can’t go any further. 

    I will try to share my very earliest memory in a humorous way.  Anyway, my earliest memory  is of me wearing diapers but having difficulty transitioning from diapers to the ‘big people’s potty’.  Back then we couldn’t afford those little ‘porta-potties’ that could fit over or clamp onto a regular toilet bowl, so Mom just held me over the toilet with her hands around my chest and locked under my armpits.    I very clearly remember that I preferred the feeling of a soft warm moist diaper to that of a cold hard toilet.  My diaper and my  crib gave me greater security than the bathroom with all the strange looking things in it, meaning  the plumbing fixtures.  Diapers were more convenient than the potty too, since it was so much easier to just lay in the crib and relax and let ‘things’ happen, versus having Mom hang on to me while straining my guts out trying to drop a log in the toilet.  I mean, why make life more difficult than it already is?  I was very naïve back then and actually believed that life should get easier as one gets older.  Ha-ha, a little humor there!  In my infantile mind, the toilet was my enemy and the diaper was my friend.  The diaper seemed so natural and the porcelain pony seemed so foreign.  I became very upset when Mom would take my diaper off me and hold me above the toilet bowl.  Even at the tender age of two, life was rapidly becoming cluttered with difficult decisions.  Should I stay with the soft warm squishy diaper that was my constant and lovable companion, or should I venture into the unknown and go with the cold hard toilet?  Naturally if padded and heated toilet seats had been around back then, it certainly would have made my decision a whole lot easier. 

    I recall there was something else going on with me too.  I recall having a fear of mom losing her grip and me falling into the toilet and accidentally getting flushed down.  That fear caused me to ‘tense up’, which made it all the more difficult to relieve myself.  I also had another fear.  I can clearly recall having a fear of losing a part of me, namely my “insides”.  Since my poop had no resemblance to the food I ate, in my 2 year old mind I didn’t connect the two, but rather thought that the poop was just another part of me.  If I dropped it in the diaper, the poop while outside of my tummy, was still very near to me and constantly reminding me of its presence, but if it got flushed down the toilet, part of me was gone forever.  Those two fears are totally hilarious when I think about it in the here-and-now, however back when I was 2 that was very serious business.  I recall that it was during the warm weather when I became toilet trained, and of course my birthday is in June.  That’s why I say that I did it when I was two, maybe plus or minus a month or so. 

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Memories are very unreliable. Every time you remember something you changing it slightly, things you think you remember may never have happened, they may have been a dream that you forgot was a dream or it may have been an event that has been greatly distorted over time. They are shaped my subsequent memories, experiences, emotions, etc...

The more you remember something or the further back you remember the less likely the memory is reliable even though you would swear it happened.

For instance, I swear that I have a memory of one of my very early birthdays involved a party at Bushy Park with a train cake, I can remember the frosting and how it tasted great, better than anything since... The only problem is that speaking to my mother I never had a birthday party at Bushy Park and the frosting I remember in my mind is quite unlike anything else I've ever seen. It's a false memory but it feels just like a real one.

I won't say what you remembered never happened or anything like that, just that you should treat memories, especially memories that early, with a lot of scepticism.

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I posted this before but I remember one evening my dad took me in the next room ( a bedroom that was used for a play room and had the crib and baby dresser) to change my diaper.  I was laying on the floor on a pad with my diaper unpinned but still under me.  No baby wipes back then so my dad got up and went into the bathroom for a wet washcloth.  While he was in there I totally remember sitting up at the waist looking down inside my diaper between my legs and wondering how that poop got inside it!  Seriously, I saw the poop in my open diaper but had no idea how it got there!  I have no idea how old I was then, but probably just under age 2 or around that age.

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Sorry to disappoint you"Big E", but I did check this out with Mom before she passed away.  Yes, that is the way it happened.  I merely chose to "dress up" the facts with a little of my own type of humor.  If you wish, I can PM you with a cut-and-paste from my autobiography discussing my writing style.  In that section I also compare my writing style with some of the more common styles out there.  Just let me know (PM) one way or the other.

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On 2/23/2018 at 4:16 PM, rusty pins said:

I posted this before but I remember one evening my dad took me in the next room ( a bedroom that was used for a play room and had the crib and baby dresser) to change my diaper.  I was laying on the floor on a pad with my diaper unpinned but still under me.  No baby wipes back then so my dad got up and went into the bathroom for a wet washcloth.  While he was in there I totally remember sitting up at the waist looking down inside my diaper between my legs and wondering how that poop got inside it!  Seriously, I saw the poop in my open diaper but had no idea how it got there!  I have no idea how old I was then, but probably just under age 2 or around that age.

I remember something similar.  Laying on changing pad on the bathroom floor at my grandmother's house while she changed a messy diaper and seemed not happy about it.  I knew there was something in my diaper but didn't feel that I had control of it.  I was about 2.

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I’m sure I may have related this story before, but I can tell it again. 

I rememder when I was about 2.5 to 3 maybe. I was laying in my crib, being readied for nighttime sleep. My mother was putting me in a diaper (cloth), and I got anxious cause, when I looked up at her, she was putting the pins in her mouth, to hold while she got my diaper nice and snug. I got anxious cause she said “ouch”. I thought she had stuck herself in the lip, which she did, but not bad. But, what I saw was her chapped lips, and to me, it was from being stuck with the pins. So, she never really did prick her lip, just felt the point brush her lip. But, the event stuck with me, and I still can vividly see the whole event play out, to this day. 

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I can vaguely remember a few potty training moments. The cotton terry cloth training pants and the little potty chair.  I can remember using the potty chair a few times, but that's it. 

My Mom told me that She used both cloth and disposables on me. Disposables were just coming out at the time. I can't remember being diapered or any diaper changes.

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I remember that we had a wooden potty chair but I never remember sitting on it.  I just remember it still around off in a corner somewhere when I was older.  I do remember one time sitting on the toilet while my dad was encouraging me to poop in it.  I remember one time putting on yellow terry cloth training pants.  Thats all I remember about potty training, and probably a good thing too!  I think at my age kids were trained, or started training earlier.  No Pull-Ups or goodnites or even redily available disposable diapers back then to just toss out when used.  Parents had to wash dirty and wet diapers and training pants and clothing way back then so I think there was more motivation to get the kids trained earlier.

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Potty training and cloth diapers. 

Most moms/parents, back in the cloth diaper era looked to get the kids out of diapers ASAP. Doing extra laundry was a good motivator for mom, to motivate the kiddies to use the potty. I know this was something that my mom was keen on. She always complained, of having to take all the laundry down to the basement to wash, then outside to hang dry, then back up stairs to start over again. And when it rained, she had to go to the attic, to hand things to dry. Wasn’t till later, we go our first clothes drier. So, I was pushed be out of them diapers quickly. 

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One of my earliest memories was when I must have been about 4.  I remember standing naked, after a bath, in the hallway outside my bedroom that I shared with my younger brother (who must have been about 2.)  I remember my mother standing there with my younger brother, pins in her mouth, putting a cloth diaper on him for the night.  I remember her turning to look at me and saying, "Go get your pajamas on", and turning back to my brother.  I remember thinking that maybe if I wore a diaper, she'd pay more attention to me.

I wouldn't be surprised if that's where part of my DL complex was started, or at least significantly reinforced.

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I remember being in diapers for maybe 4or5 then dry till my 50,s then have had very few dry times due to being a diabetic.I did have 1 dry night a few wks ago but then realized I didn,t drink much the day before because of trips.

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  • 2 months later...

I don’t have any memories of my diapers or toilet training at all, or even of my younger sister’s. My earliest memories are of being in the bath with particular bath toys —  a plastic submarine, a frog that squirted water — and being washed and dried and cuddled by my mom. I remember riding on a little orange plastic riding tractor in the front yard. I must be three or four in these memories.

I still wet my bed, a lot, but for some reason my mom never had us in diapers or even training pants for that. I would just wake up in wet pyjamas and sheets. I don’t remember anything different than that. I wish I did. I long to have diaper memories.

I remember it coming as a shock a few years later to notice that the laundry hampers my sisters and I used had the logo of the Stork Diaper Service on them. That hamper had been my diaper pail, full of my wet and (gulp) dirty diapers. Me, in diapers? I couldn’t even imagine being that little. I found the idea of ever being in diapers squirmingly embarrassing and always hoped none of my friends would ever notice that logo in my bedroom. Especially since I still wet my bed sometimes, and (blush) it occasionally smelled a little bit like a baby’s room in there. 

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5 minutes ago, nonny said:

 

I still wet my bed, a lot, but for some reason my mom never had us in diapers or even training pants for that. I would just wake up in wet pyjamas and sheets. I don’t remember anything different than that. I wish I did. I long to have diaper memories.

 

I can relate Nonny. I also wet the bed some, at an early age. Your mom may have felt, that if you had diapers, or training pants, you would have been to comfortable in them/using them, and would continue to wet the bed. 

I too, never had any protection to wear for my bedwetting, and I think that was the mindset. I had a plastic mattress cover, to save the mattress, but nothing else. I’d wake up with everything wet, then have to wake my mom up, to help change everything. 

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According to my family history, I was day dry at 30 months and completely dry at 33 months, despite having a tiny over-active bladder. The same was true for my older sister. Neither of us ever wet a bed until we reached puberty, when we did revert to bedwetting. It was only then that we began wearing diapers to bed. Because of OAB Mom asked us nicely to wear 'just-in-case' diapers on trips and special events where toilets were hard to find.

Our two younger sisters took forever to day train. Ruth was in diapers 24/7 until she was 5. Missy, the youngest, needed vinyl panties over trainers with a folded gauze diaper as soaker, for school until she was 8. I am 5 years older than Missy. We shared a room once she was out of her crib. A changing table was kept in our room. When I was 9 I was taught how to pin diapers on Missy. She never gained night control. She was taught how to pin on her own diapers at age 11.

What Mom told me back in the early 1970's was that commonly parents were told that providing children older than 3 diapers would delay their toilet training. Mom, her mother Granny Vi and all of her sisters had various bladder problems. They wore diapers when necessary, so they all felt it was nonsense that providing diapers to older kids who wet would delay toilet training. A small percentage of kids never gain bladder control.

Circa 1992, when women first started being trained as urologists, the most recently trained physicians came to believe the health risks associated with sleeping in a wet bed was so dangerous as to make denying needed diapers irresponsible parenting.

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