Busted by parents - please help

[Firefly 35]

6 hours ago, SoggySoCal said:

You aren't helping yourself any by continuing to leave your used diapers where the dog can get at them. 

I'll see what I can do.  My dog is kind of crazy, so it's possible that he'll out me no matter where I put them.  That being said, I have a couple ideas.  

2 hours ago, Somelildude said:

Good luck, and may the odds be ever in your favor.

LOL.  Talking to my parents feels like the hunger games sometimes.

7 hours ago, AbabeBill said:

I think the dog is at the root of your problem here, and is knowingly  trying to out you. He may be having feelings of neglect, due to your extended hours away at school and work. So, he takes out this frustration by tearing up your used diapers. 

Give him more attention! ! ! 

Of course I’m only kidding, and trying to add some levity. 

What I would advise, has for the most part already been covered. For the time being, soft peddle anything to do with diapers, bedwetting and the like, should it come up. It is your business, but it is your parents home, and to them, you still may be viewed as their little kid. They might still feel the need to look out for you. Especially as you are in a sort of, state of fluxe. You may soon be gone from their day to day lives. So, bottom line. Do what you want to, continue with your diapers, enjoy them as much as possible, but you have to be much better, for now, at being covert about handling things. Good luck! 

Anything specific you would recommend?

[AbabeBill]

I would just recommend, dealing with any used diapers ASAP. Bag them up, as soon as you remove them. Take the used, bagged up diaper out, and if possible, trash it away from home. If that is not always an option, the next best thing is, hiding it in the outside home trash. Conceal it in something that has already been put in the trash, another bag, box, carton, etc. If you must hold on to the used diapers in your room for a time, again bag them up, double bag them. Put them into some type of secure container, dog proof! A small non see through tote box, or small metal container, like a cookie tin. Tape it shut! You can also make small holes in the handles of a tote box, then put zip ties through them. You will need to cut the zip tie, every time you need to use it, or reopen it. But it will make it secure, and if you use color ties, it will allow you to know it they have been tampered with.   

For any conversations on the subject with your parents, I advise you adapt a "don't ask, don't tell" attitude. Say as little as you possibly can, if it gets brought up. If they ask, tell them, it's going fine, no problems. Then, move on, change the subject. If there's a hot topic going on, that is of interest, or importance to your parents, change the subject to that. Something you know, they like to go on about. A pet peeve of there's would be good. 

Maybe some of this will help you, hope so? Luck!   

[rusty pins]

On ‎1‎/‎8‎/‎2018 at 3:40 PM, Firefly 35 said:

Once again, it would seem that the dog shredded my dirty diaper and left the pieces on the floor.  This time, I wrapped my diaper tightly in a trash bag and left my door closed.  How is this possible?!

 

On ‎1‎/‎8‎/‎2018 at 5:00 PM, AbabeBill said:

I think the dog is at the root of your problem here.

No, the dog is not the root of your problem, Firefly.  YOU ARE!  Plain and simple.  You got caught because the dog got in your room and trashed your used diapers that you had stashed there.  Your parents noticed what the dog did and you got busted.  You found a way out with "stressful bedwetting", but you didn't go further with the advise people gave you, which is, "GET RID OF THE USED DIAPERS EACH AND EVERY DAY!"  If you go out and leave a used diaper in your room, no matter how hidden it might be, anything can happen.  This time it was the dog again.  Next time it could be your mom or dad or maybe even a close friend (girlfriend perhaps) who stopped by when you were out to return a book, jacket or something she borrowed, or maybe someone needs the homework assignment and your mom says, "Let's look in his room and see if his books are there".  The only way to prevent it from happening is get rid of your diapers each day after use and never leave the house with a used diaper in your room.  I'm 58 years old and speak from years of experience.  My parents could have caught me many times and at times I even resorted to getting up at 6am before anyone else and sneaking used diapers out to my car or the trash, and a few times tying the bag with the used diapers to a string and lowering it out my bedroom window to get past my parents who were in the living room.  You have to be creative sometimes.  When you move out and get a place of your own and live by yourself, then you can get a 50 Gallon diaper pail, put it smack in the middle of your living room if you chose to and stuff it to the brim with used diapers.  When you live with your parents in their house and don't want to get caught again with used diapers, you do what you have to do EACH AND EVERY DAY unless you want to keep getting caught or having the unexpected happen, which happens more than you would expect it to happen.  Case in point, twice now with your dog and your diapers.

Oh, and get your dog some doggy mouthwash, please!

On ‎1‎/‎8‎/‎2018 at 5:11 PM, SoggySoCal said:

You aren't helping yourself any by continuing to leave your used diapers where the dog can get at them. 

What SoggySoCal said!

[Firefly 35]

6 hours ago, rusty pins said:

 

No, the dog is not the root of your problem, Firefly.  YOU ARE!  Plain and simple.  You got caught because the dog got in your room and trashed your used diapers that you had stashed there.  Your parents noticed what the dog did and you got busted.  You found a way out with "stressful bedwetting", but you didn't go further with the advise people gave you, which is, "GET RID OF THE USED DIAPERS EACH AND EVERY DAY!"  If you go out and leave a used diaper in your room, no matter how hidden it might be, anything can happen.  This time it was the dog again.  Next time it could be your mom or dad or maybe even a close friend (girlfriend perhaps) who stopped by when you were out to return a book, jacket or something she borrowed, or maybe someone needs the homework assignment and your mom says, "Let's look in his room and see if his books are there".  The only way to prevent it from happening is get rid of your diapers each day after use and never leave the house with a used diaper in your room.  I'm 58 years old and speak from years of experience.  My parents could have caught me many times and at times I even resorted to getting up at 6am before anyone else and sneaking used diapers out to my car or the trash, and a few times tying the bag with the used diapers to a string and lowering it out my bedroom window to get past my parents who were in the living room.  You have to be creative sometimes.  When you move out and get a place of your own and live by yourself, then you can get a 50 Gallon diaper pail, put it smack in the middle of your living room if you chose to and stuff it to the brim with used diapers.  When you live with your parents in their house and don't want to get caught again with used diapers, you do what you have to do EACH AND EVERY DAY unless you want to keep getting caught or having the unexpected happen, which happens more than you would expect it to happen.  Case in point, twice now with your dog and your diapers.

Oh, and get your dog some doggy mouthwash, please!

What SoggySoCal said!

I have been disposing of my diapers as soon as I can.  The problem is that sometimes my mom likes to watch tv downstairs late at night with the lights off.  She also keeps the volume down very low as a courtesy to those who are sleeping, but that also makes it almost impossible for me to know if she's still downstairs until I'm about 5 seconds from being busted.  I'm not trying to use this as an excuse, but just saying that accounting for all of the variables is a lot easier said than done.  

[ozziebee]

now that your dog has the taste of your used diapers he'll do it again and again and again. 

 

God is knows why you haven't even attempted to hide them out of reach of the dog, up high in a cupboard or something, or in a locked/clamped up box. 

[dl_ashlee]

One suggestion, whatever you do do not have them buy diapers for you.

And just like the others said use a don't ask don't tell policy. If they ask say its better and make sure they don't find a wet one again.

Keep the dry ones and if they find it, then just say you have them just in case the stress wetting comes back.

[rusty pins]

On ‎1‎/‎9‎/‎2018 at 11:56 PM, Firefly 35 said:

I have been disposing of my diapers as soon as I can.  The problem is that sometimes my mom likes to watch tv downstairs late at night with the lights off.  She also keeps the volume down very low as a courtesy to those who are sleeping, but that also makes it almost impossible for me to know if she's still downstairs until I'm about 5 seconds from being busted.  I'm not trying to use this as an excuse, but just saying that accounting for all of the variables is a lot easier said than done.  

Ok, disposing of them as soon as you can is a good idea.  Problem is, sometimes that's still not good enough seeing as the dog got at them again.  You have to learn tips for getting them out of the house.  Do you drive and have a car?  If so, when you go somewhere, such as school classes each day, stop along the way and throw your used diapers out in a public trash can.  Getting them out of the house could be as easy as putting the bagged up ones in your backpack each morning.  I'm not a student, but don't kids including college age kids still carry their books in a backpack?  Whatever you carry your books in, a couple of used bagged up diapers should fit inside to be tossed out on your way to wherever your going each day.  If you simply can't take a used diaper out for some reason or are staying home all day, do you have an old backpack?  At least zip it up tight inside and then hang it from a hanger in your closet (I suggest the end of your hanger bar against the wall so it's somewhat hidden or unoticable) so your dog can't get at the contents inside.  Remember you have a diaper in there and don't forget about it for a week!   You have to learn to be creative.  What's to prevent you from going downstairs late at night empty handed to see if your mom is watching TV or in bed?  If she's watching TV you can say you came down for a quick snack and head to the kitchen.  If she's already gone to bed, then go back and get your diaper and take it out or do what you had planned on doing with it.  Like I say, many times I have lowered a used diaper out my bedroom window and behind the bushes along the side of the house to be retrieved when I get up.  Just don't forget they are there and have your dad find them when he's doing yard work.  By the way, how do you get your diapers in the house without your parents finding out?  Will that work in reverse?  As a method of remembering something on a daily bases, what I often do is take a small strip of paper and write a note on it and then tape it through the ring that holds my car keys.  That way I can't go anywhere without noticing the paper on my car key ring and I won't forget to bring along with me what I need.  You don't even have to write "Dirty Diapers" on it.  Just the paper taped around your car key ring or somewhere else like on your phone is a reminder to not leave the house without taking your used diapers with you. 

[LittleAmytheil]

I cannot recommend enough the daily removal tip. When. I was your age, I had both a job and college (that makes my almost 30yo self feel old). Either way, almost 6/7 or 7/7 days I would be leaving my parents in the morning. I would toss my diapers in a supermarket plastic bag and take them out in my backpack or handbag. Once at my job/campus, I'd toss the bag into the first trash I passed.

Even when I moved out I would do this, as I would only toss my indoor trash once a week and didn't want anything getting...ripe.

[Firefly 35]

Makes sense

[ImDiapered]

On 1/10/2018 at 5:33 AM, dl_ashlee said:

One suggestion, whatever you do do not have them buy diapers for you.

And just like the others said use a don't ask don't tell policy. If they ask say its better and make sure they don't find a wet one again.

Keep the dry ones and if they find it, then just say you have them just in case the stress wetting comes back.

Everything's been said. Absolutely don't accept any diapers from your dad under the given pretense. Don't ask Don't tell is a good way of putting it, you have a voice and you can also choose to not comment if it's nobody else's business. I live alone, and I still bag my diapers before disposal in the trash, at home as in public. There's always something you can do.

[xtrabulk]

On 1/5/2018 at 4:53 AM, diaperedboilerman said:

Too bad it was Depends he offered instead of better diapers. I would totally go for it and figure out as time goes on what to do. Take it one day at a time.Telling them that you just like diapers is not going to go well in my opinion. But acting like you need them at least on occasion might work. After all worse case your parents stop buying them in short time thinking you are being lazy. And for a month or what ever you get the privilege of being allowed to wear diapers. 

  The more difficult and best solution..your 19. Get a job and your own place and wear 24/7 as you wish.

 

Maybe your dad said "Depends" as a person would say, "Could you Xerox this page?" If it were me, I'd opt for a better brand and say, "Yes, I did some research, and this is a great product for my needs." Lots of folks call all adult diapers "Depends."

[Firefly 35]

18 hours ago, xtrabulk said:

Maybe your dad said "Depends" as a person would say, "Could you Xerox this page?" If it were me, I'd opt for a better brand and say, "Yes, I did some research, and this is a great product for my needs." Lots of folks call all adult diapers "Depends."

I would say tykables or peekabu, but that would obviously raise a lot more questions.   

[SoggySoCal]

Has it even been brought up again? 

[Firefly 35]

No, thank goodness.

[azdl95]

Actually, sometimes you just tell them the truth. And make them understand your situation. Tell them the story about ABDL. And tell them that you just not the only one that like to wear a diaper. Because sometimes certain people doesn’t know about our existence. If you tell them the truth, you explain to them what actually ABDL’s about, why ABDL’s happen?, It is dangerous to our health? For me, I will find an article on the internet, that explain about ABDL. And if somebody caugth me, I’ll send them the link of that article. For now, I don’t have any problems regarding to wear my diaper. My parents already know about this, yeah at the 1st place it is hard for them to accept me for who I am. But now, the have no problems. I can walk around in the house wearing diaper. Eventhough, just diaper with shirt its ok to them. My wife also like me to wear diaper, sometimes when I am not in the mood to wear the diaper for such a long period, she will asked me why, is there any problems. My mother in-law also know about my diaper lover sites and she ok with it. You just need to tell truth. Where I get the strenght to tell all of them the truth? From this websites. When I felt down and think I am wierd, I will open this forum, read some topics and you will feel that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. 

trust me, when you tell them the truth, you will feel very very very free. Eventhought they mad at you, they hard to accept for who you are. You will feel free. Everything takes time. Tell the truth is better than keep thinking a new answer everytimes the find out. 

[Firefly 35]

12 hours ago, azdl95 said:

Actually, sometimes you just tell them the truth. And make them understand your situation. Tell them the story about ABDL. And tell them that you just not the only one that like to wear a diaper. Because sometimes certain people doesn’t know about our existence. If you tell them the truth, you explain to them what actually ABDL’s about, why ABDL’s happen?, It is dangerous to our health? For me, I will find an article on the internet, that explain about ABDL. And if somebody caugth me, I’ll send them the link of that article. For now, I don’t have any problems regarding to wear my diaper. My parents already know about this, yeah at the 1st place it is hard for them to accept me for who I am. But now, the have no problems. I can walk around in the house wearing diaper. Eventhough, just diaper with shirt its ok to them. My wife also like me to wear diaper, sometimes when I am not in the mood to wear the diaper for such a long period, she will asked me why, is there any problems. My mother in-law also know about my diaper lover sites and she ok with it. You just need to tell truth. Where I get the strenght to tell all of them the truth? From this websites. When I felt down and think I am wierd, I will open this forum, read some topics and you will feel that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. 

trust me, when you tell them the truth, you will feel very very very free. Eventhought they mad at you, they hard to accept for who you are. You will feel free. Everything takes time. Tell the truth is better than keep thinking a new answer everytimes the find out. 

I have thought about that, but my parents are the kind of people who get way too stuck in their line of thinking.  For example, I was diagnosed with autism over 10 years ago, and my parents have yet to see my autism as a different way of being (that has both strenths and weaknesses) instead of simply a disability.  They are pretty accepting overall, and would most likely accept me as a DL, but would consider it as a defense mechanism against a mental problem that needs to be fixed.

You make a good point, but unfortunately, my parents have proven to be untrustworthy.

[azdl95]

8 hours ago, Firefly 35 said:

I have thought about that, but my parents are the kind of people who get way too stuck in their line of thinking.  For example, I was diagnosed with autism over 10 years ago, and my parents have yet to see my autism as a different way of being (that has both strenths and weaknesses) instead of simply a disability.  They are pretty accepting overall, and would most likely accept me as a DL, but would consider it as a defense mechanism against a mental problem that needs to be fixed.

You make a good point, but unfortunately, my parents have proven to be untrustworthy.

http://www.adriansurley.com/understanding-diaper-lovers/

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraphilic_infantilism

This is a few websites that will make your parents be more understanding. 

and this topic explain how many person that try to stop, but at the end they just accept for who they are. Maybe all this can help your parents be more understanding. Actually, ABDL doesn’t need a medical attention. We just need to learn to accept ourself. And try to convince the others. Actually, I still hide my DL sites from outside world but the most important is person who close to you need to know about this and try to understand you. It just take sometimes for your parents to accept you. Trust me. I’ve take like 2 years to make my parents to accept me for who I am. After 8 years hiding. And caught more than hundred times. I still remember when I was 10 years old I get caught by my dad, and my dad very mad at me and he force me to eat the diaper (seem I dont wet that time, so it is a clean diaper. Hahaha) I don’t think that your parents are crazy like my parents. Hahahaha. Just don’t give up. Trust me. It just take times. Hope this will help you. To be free. 

[rusty pins]

All good points but a stranger can only suggest different ideas for the person with the problem.  Everyone is different, especially parents.  Some have very old fashioned morals and others are way more open.  Only one person knows, and that's the person with the problem.  I say don't rock the boat at this point if it's forgotten and not mentioned anymore.

[Firefly 35]

13 hours ago, rusty pins said:

All good points but a stranger can only suggest different ideas for the person with the problem.  Everyone is different, especially parents.  Some have very old fashioned morals and others are way more open.  Only one person knows, and that's the person with the problem.  I say don't rock the boat at this point if it's forgotten and not mentioned anymore.

My parents aren't particularily "old fashioned", and they even said that if I were to come out as LBGT (which I'm not), they would be ok with it and still support me.  The difference with ABDLism is that it is much less understood and accepted, and things like that are their biggest weakness.  They keep giving me all sorts of grief about my depression, and no matter how much I prove that it is a legitimate medical condition, they always just write it off as me being lazy.  If I were to come out as a DL, they would most likely find some reason to claim that it's wrong, and/or that diapers would stink up the house.  (And both of those have already been proven wrong, btw).  So yes, it would be a good idea to not rock the boat so that my parents don't sink it.

[LiL Marc]

What I'am going to say took me years to understantd.

It took you time probably to accept you're DL side and now you would like your parents to accept you overnight.

Give them time, the mind takes time to assimilate things, and then even without you knowing it they are going to start reading and learning about it
The best thing about it, is that the majority of parents have an unconditional love for their children

Give them time

[Firefly 35]

13 hours ago, LiL Marc said:

Give them time

To come to terms with my DL side?

I would agree with you, but they have had over a decade to understand my autism and about 3 years to understand my depression, and have yet to fully accept either.  At this point, my mental health cannot take excuses and bs from them about yet another situation, and I don't think it would be wise to risk letting that happen.

[Bettypooh]

Here's two lessons you will find more valuable in life than everything else you learn combined First is to learn to CYOA. If you do that well enough many problems simply will not happen anymore. Second is that there is always a way to achieve your goals though it usually means making compromises you'd rather not have to make. If you choose the correct path to your goals, then in the end you will be able to undo those compromises and have it all

Life takes time and the sooner you get these two concepts working well for you, the sooner you'll find your bliss

Bettypooh