LL Medico Diapers and More Bambino Adult Baby Diapers
mark686

telling parents and close freinds

29 posts in this topic

I have bean having issues with stress/urge and bed wetting incontinence for the past year since I fell on some ice in a parking lot and it has been getting worse to the point if I get up I leak in my shorts. I do sometimes wear diapers when I am going to be out for a while or doing something where I may have a accident. I went and seen my doctor and a uroligest and nothing was found. now it is getting to the point that I may have to wear full time. I don't tell my mom everything like that I whent to the doctor for this issue but I am self employed and am around my moms a lot when I work near her house. in my opinion she over reacts to a lot of stuff so looking for advice how to go about telling her?

Share this post


Link to post

Why do you feel you have to tell her?  Does she tell you what underwear she wears?  The thing is, you say she over reacts to a lot of stuff.  I'd let it go, don't say anything to anyone unless they ask you (if they even notice).  Then just say that you have been having some problems ever since you fell on the ice last year, you have been to the doctor and urologist and they are monitoring the situation.  If your mom or someone asks why you didn't tell them, just say you have the situation under control and why would they even feel they have to ask in the first place?  Don't tell, wait until (if ever) someone asks you and then make like it is no big deal, you have it under control.

2 people like this

Share this post


Link to post

Posted (edited)

After a fall that has such an affect on you, I would see a chiropractor.

If you're not a fan of chiro, then I would look for a good masseuse.

Either way, that costs  out of pocket money  to the self-imployed.

If you're not all out losing control and flooding, just frequent dribbles,
then i suggest a plastic pants and a pad  system, much more discreet. 

Cuddling in mommy's lap and letting her know you wear diapers is not

going to solve a nerve problem.  It will make her worry more.

 

 

 

 

happiness is wearing cotton diapers

Edited by babylin
grammer, missing words
2 people like this

Share this post


Link to post
15 minutes ago, babylin said:

After a fall that has such an affect on you, I would see a chiropractor.

If you're not a fan of chiro, then I would look for a good masseuse.

Either way, that costs  out of pocket money  to the self-imployed.

If you're not all out losing control and flooding, just frequent dribbles,
then i suggest a plastic pants and a pad  system, much more discreet. 

Cuddling in mommy's lap and letting her know you wear diapers is not

going to solve a nerve problem.  It will make her worry more.

 

 

 

 

happiness is wearing cotton diapers

I have been to a chiropractor and it helped some not worried as much about friends as I am my mom she will eventualy find out. and yes it usualy is a lot like wet jeans so more protection is better

Share this post


Link to post

Stay cool .

You can "What If" yourself crazy.  

Meantime, do your own laundry.

 

 

 

happiness is wearing cotton diapers

Share this post


Link to post
1 hour ago, babylin said:

Stay cool .

You can "What If" yourself crazy.  

Meantime, do your own laundry.

 

 

 

happiness is wearing cotton diapers

i try but eventualy she is going to find out because I am there for several hours at a time helping her (my dad and mom got devoriced when I was born he was a alchoholic) sorry I cant spell vary good

 

Share this post


Link to post

Just my opinion:  If your Mom is anything like my Mom was, she will find out or notice something, and wheedle it out of you.  I think you should just tell her about your injury for starters.....  take it from there.

Share this post


Link to post

     My Family all knew I fell too I was out cold too My oldest Daughter found my out side wear I fell.She ran in the house told my wife and called 911 I was out for a day.in the hosp a week.every one found out then.I was 63 I had just retired.no one gave me any crap even my 2 older sisters

Share this post


Link to post
On ‎3‎/‎15‎/‎2017 at 9:46 PM, ELLIE52 said:

Just my opinion:  If your Mom is anything like my Mom was, she will find out or notice something, and wheedle it out of you.  I think you should just tell her about your injury for starters.....  take it from there.

she does now that I fell on the Ice, and that I did go see the chiropractor.

Share this post


Link to post

Honestly, Mark686, just take the next step, and tell her what has happened since the fall.  It seems you will feel better and that way there will be no extra stress on your relationship with your Mom.  Yes, she probably will overact.  My Mom used to do the same stuff.  If we fell or injured ourselves, she would tap or swat us which to me made no sense.  Later years, I asked her about that, and she said she was teaching us not to injure ourselves.  I say just take the next step; you've had an injury which will explain that you've hurt something that is probably causing pressure on your urethral sphincter ....  maybe disc, spinal injury of sorts.  I don't know, not a doctor or anything close.

Share this post


Link to post

If no questions are asked then there is no point in offering answers ;) You have a medical issue- so do lots of other people. It may het resolved with treatment and it may not, but stressing out over it isn't going to help. Just think about how you will answer if questions are asked, and deal with life as best you can including your current problems. That's the best approach :)

Bettypooh

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post

    This has been a lifelong issue for me, my parents have known i don't have complete control and that i struggle for how much i do have.  I don't know that i would ever have to tell them, but i don't want to, ever.   However i have suffered accidents in front of them without wearing a diaper. so i want to tell them that things haven't gotten better, but i don't have the guts to 

Share this post


Link to post
48 minutes ago, leakingdaily said:

 

    This has been a lifelong issue for me, my parents have known i don't have complete control and that i struggle for how much i do have.  I don't know that i would ever have to tell them, but i don't want to, ever.   However i have suffered accidents in front of them without wearing a diaper. so i want to tell them that things haven't gotten better, but i don't have the guts to 

 

Taken I understood it all correctly. You have a medical issue, why worry about it amongst you loved ones? If they care for you and if they love you they would never make fun of you or embarrass you. Just call things for what they are it will make your life a heck of a lot easier as you only get one to live. I know I told a lot of people around me and it worked like magic.

 

Share this post


Link to post
22 hours ago, leakingdaily said:

    This has been a lifelong issue for me, my parents have known i don't have complete control and that i struggle for how much i do have.  I don't know that i would ever have to tell them, but i don't want to, ever.   However i have suffered accidents in front of them without wearing a diaper. so i want to tell them that things haven't gotten better, but i don't have the guts to 

Your parents already know you don't have complete control.  Don't worry about it.  Most liklely they won't bring it up, therefore you don't have to bring it up either!  If y7ou have an accident in front of them without a diaper, then they know you are still having problems.  If they say something to you, then it will be because they are concerned.  All you have to say is it's still the same, doctor is aware of the situation.  They may ask in a situation where you wet in front of them, but only because they are concerned and want to make sure you are OK.  You can always say you appreciate their concern, you are doing what is necessary but don't want to talk about it.  That should end it, but they may just want reassurance that you are doing all you can and that it's not a serious medical issue you are not taking care of.

Share this post


Link to post
6 hours ago, rusty pins said:

Your parents already know you don't have complete control.  Don't worry about it.  Most liklely they won't bring it up, therefore you don't have to bring it up either!  If y7ou have an accident in front of them without a diaper, then they know you are still having problems.  If they say something to you, then it will be because they are concerned.  All you have to say is it's still the same, doctor is aware of the situation.  They may ask in a situation where you wet in front of them, but only because they are concerned and want to make sure you are OK.  You can always say you appreciate their concern, you are doing what is necessary but don't want to talk about it.  That should end it, but they may just want reassurance that you are doing all you can and that it's not a serious medical issue you are not taking care of.

this has crossed my mind to go without and let her find out that way and then explain the situation and that I have it under controle. I would  have the necessary things with me to change. may not be the perfect idea or a excellent one but.

Share this post


Link to post

I had a small conversation with my mom the other day and told her that my back is worse than first thought and I did have it checked out and some of what the doctor said. I am yet to tell her that I cant hold it vary long.

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post

I like that approach.  Take it slowly and lead into it.  You are letting her know that your back is worse but you have been seeing the doctor about it and keeping her in the loop.  I think in some cases it's much easier to lead into things gradually than blurt them out all at once if you are in a situation where you need to tell someone something.  Otherwise I would keep my business to myself.

Share this post


Link to post
On 3/19/2017 at 10:14 AM, Bettypooh said:

If no questions are asked then there is no point in offering answers

In the interest of keeping this on topic, I'd like to propose an open question.

When is the best time to tell people who you think might find out, or is that even preferable? 
I've had control issues off and on my whole life and I've been fully incontinent for the last 3 months. I'm scared of people finding out and I've been limiting my social interaction by a lot because of it. Sometimes I get jealous when my friends talk about their problems like it's no big deal but I'm reminded how taboo it is when they say they'd prefer to kill themselves then be incontinent. (to clarify, we were talking about getting old, and he said "as soon as I can't control when I go to the bathroom, I want them to pull the plug" and that's been a common thing I hear from people I know)

Like, geez, it's not that bad!  

Share this post


Link to post
8 hours ago, InconSteiner said:

In the interest of keeping this on topic, I'd like to propose an open question.

When is the best time to tell people who you think might find out, or is that even preferable? 
I've had control issues off and on my whole life and I've been fully incontinent for the last 3 months. I'm scared of people finding out and I've been limiting my social interaction by a lot because of it. Sometimes I get jealous when my friends talk about their problems like it's no big deal but I'm reminded how taboo it is when they say they'd prefer to kill themselves then be incontinent. (to clarify, we were talking about getting old, and he said "as soon as I can't control when I go to the bathroom, I want them to pull the plug" and that's been a common thing I hear from people I know)

Like, geez, it's not that bad!  

just do everything possible to conseal that you are wearing I live in a small town and have not been questioned yet. get comfortable in public first.

 

Share this post


Link to post

I wear depends real fit when around other people or in public but when by myself i find the walgreens brand fitted breifs to be real absorbent. I'm wearing them right now and have already peed in them twice and they havent leaked at all so i'm waiting to see if i can go a third time

 

Share this post


Link to post
On ‎3‎/‎30‎/‎2017 at 1:26 AM, InconSteiner said:

In the interest of keeping this on topic, I'd like to propose an open question.

When is the best time to tell people who you think might find out, or is that even preferable? 
I've had control issues off and on my whole life and I've been fully incontinent for the last 3 months. I'm scared of people finding out and I've been limiting my social interaction by a lot because of it. Sometimes I get jealous when my friends talk about their problems like it's no big deal but I'm reminded how taboo it is when they say they'd prefer to kill themselves then be incontinent. (to clarify, we were talking about getting old, and he said "as soon as I can't control when I go to the bathroom, I want them to pull the plug" and that's been a common thing I hear from people I know)

Like, geez, it's not that bad!  

Personally I say don't tell anyone.  Don't offer any more information than what is necessary!  People won't notice when you go about your normal day.  Close friends who you see all the time might eventually pick up on it.  Don't say anything unless they bring it up first.  If one should bring it up to you in a privet conversation, I would be frank and admit it with an explination of why.  For example:  "Frank, can I ask you something personal?"  "Sure, go ahead."  "I noticed sometimes that you seem to look a little puffy around your pants, and, well, a couple times it looked like you were wearing something bulky.  Is there a problem?"  "I have a medical issue I don't usually talk about.  A couple years ago (I fell on the ice, I twisted my back at work, I got a serious infection of my urinary system, whatever) and over time it has caused me problems with urinary control.  I do wear protection now to deal with it.  Not something I talk about and not something that hinders me much.  Just something I deal with.  No big issue".  That is your explination, plain and simple.  Tough to admit to someone?  Sure it is, but it is the simple truth.  I believe people are much more accepting when the know there is a medical reason and what that medical issue is.  Instead of looking at you like some pervert who likes wearing diapers, they treat you with a bit of sympathy for what you have to do.  Once one person knows, I'm sure he will bring it up to your other mutual friends but if they are real friends they won't treat you different or anything.  They may ask about it or seem a little uncomfortable around you at first but a simple quick explination is all that is needed and then back to normal.  On the plus side, once people do know, it is less stressful!  No more worry that someone may find out and wonder.  No more trying to really hide it or declining invitations when you think it could possibly come out.  Eventually you may get to joke a little about it, such as when you are at a movie or concert with friends and they have to use the restroom!  You can say, "Have fun standing in line!"  Even your friends will feel less uncomfortable around you when they realize they can be themselves and not have to try and hide the fact that they know and not say something that would offend you.  Make light of the subject, show that it doesn't bother you and everyone will feel better and less stressed out.

Share this post


Link to post

Awesome response Rusty Pins.  That's just the way it has worked out for me and it has just been a "no issue" for me and my friends.  

Share this post


Link to post

I would never voluntarily tell anyone in RL that I wear diapers, and I've only ever had anyone (one of my closest friends) say anything to me about it. I had bent over and my shirt rose up, my pants slid down, and there were my plastic pants popping out to say "Hi!". It went a little something like this:

Him: Why are you wearing plastic underwear?
Me (thinking as fast as I possibly could and deciding to just play it up): In case my diaper leaks.
Him: Wait. What? Why are you wearing a diaper?
Me: To keep my pants from getting wet, duh!
Him: Oh. I didn't know you needed to wear them.
Me: Yeah. It's not really something I talk about.

And then he talked about how wild he thought it was that he never noticed and how it must suck and then we went right back to doing what we were doing. He still occasionally makes jokes about my diapers, but only in private, and he's never mean about it.

I honestly can't think about any time I would ever have to tell anyone that I wear diapers (or any time that I would ever want to tell anyone) without them asking first.

1 person likes this

Share this post


Link to post

The only 2 persons that I told were my Wife and Doctor that I began wetting my bed, at 56 years of age. You ask how can I fool my wife easy I work nights she works days and we very rarely sleep with each other. It's not much of a secret now. I have my diapers on my side of the bed and everybody including my grown up daughter and son in law, grandkids has seen then nobody has said word one. Other than my 14 year old Grandaughter found my plastic pants and asked what are these? She didn't know she was raised in the disposable generation. That's the most that's been said to me in two years since it began.

Share this post


Link to post
On 4/2/2017 at 8:52 PM, Floaty_Boy said:

I would never voluntarily tell anyone in RL that I wear diapers, and I've only ever had anyone (one of my closest friends) say anything to me about it. I had bent over and my shirt rose up, my pants slid down, and there were my plastic pants popping out to say "Hi!". It went a little something like this:

Him: Why are you wearing plastic underwear?
Me (thinking as fast as I possibly could and deciding to just play it up): In case my diaper leaks.
Him: Wait. What? Why are you wearing a diaper?
Me: To keep my pants from getting wet, duh!
Him: Oh. I didn't know you needed to wear them.
Me: Yeah. It's not really something I talk about.

And then he talked about how wild he thought it was that he never noticed and how it must suck and then we went right back to doing what we were doing. He still occasionally makes jokes about my diapers, but only in private, and he's never mean about it.

I honestly can't think about any time I would ever have to tell anyone that I wear diapers (or any time that I would ever want to tell anyone) without them asking first.

Perfect way to answer that question, short and direct. That's also a good friend you have there.

Share this post


Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now