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what causes ABDL desires

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What causes us to like what we like and do what we do. This question has been on my mind for a long time and have looked for answers but to no avail. Of corse its linked to some mental phenomenon but what really triggers it? Maybe abuse as a child, abandonment/lack of parents being present threw those early years, or perhaps something even deeper than that. If anyone has any knowledge or ideas that would be much appreciated.

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It's different for different people. Personally, I wasn't abused, wasn't abandoned, had wonderful loving parents that were present and raised me well. For me it certainly doesn't come from a negative space although it certainly does for others.

That said, the why isn't really important to me. I'm happy, confident, married to a wonderful women that accepts and participates in my diaper play and I accept my desires and have no desire to change them.

Over time you'll find the why matters less than just being happy and comfortable with who you are.

Snugglebear 

 

 

 

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"Over time you'll find the why matters less than just being happy and comfortable with who you are."

That is true, because the more things you read about how people got started in their abdl or other fetish lives, the more you'll see that there doesn't seem to be any common factor in their backgrounds or upbringings, and that the common factor seems to be the way one's brain is wired.

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Although it is nearly impossible to sum up the reasons in a short post, there are a couple of basic things that can cause someone to engage in infantilism, and they are polar opposite reasons. A bad childhood with abuse can cause a person to desire to "relive" a part of their childhood without the pain, thus they revert to a time when they remember (even subconsciously) a time when there was no pain. On the opposite end of the scale--which is my own experience--they had a wonderful childhood that they wished would never end. They seek out the same comfort by wearing diapers and dressing/playing a child of a certain age that gave them the most pleasure. Of course this is a generalization, and you will no doubt hear from others about their experiences as well.

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As a DL,  diapers seem to be my only semi-addiction. I don't do drugs or smoke, and I'm not an alcoholic. So no physical harm is happening to me,  and nothing bad happening to others, such as rubbery or worse.  I guess it's somewhat embarrassing at most, to say that I like diapers. 

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21 hours ago, GNXL1 said:

As a DL,  diapers seem to be my only semi-addiction. I don't do drugs or smoke, and I'm not an alcoholic. So no physical harm is happening to me,  and nothing bad happening to others, such as rubbery or worse.  I guess it's somewhat embarrassing at most, to say that I like diapers. 

 

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Trust me I feel the same way, as a DL myself. They may be my semi-addiction too.I used to drink, smoke weed and cigarettes. I even vapped for a while too and I quit everything. I indulge in my bambinos once a week, cause that's all my schedule has time for. Now my mom's in town for Christmas for 2 weeks so I won't be able to wear until she's gone.i recently got a pair of PVC diaper cover so that's supposed to help with odors right??

Anyways, ever since I was a kid, I've always had a desire for diapers, but was never able to buy any till I was about 22 that's when I was still living with my parents. Stupid goodnights sunk up my room so I threw them all away after using only 1.

I guess I'll never know why I became an abdl. But I enjoy it and it's something that'll never go away. Now days I enjoy high end diapers like bambinos and dry 247s. I'm a grown up and buy what I want. We've all come a long way from not having what we want and not doing what we wanted. I know this because I used to use plastic bags from the store because I didn't know adult diapers even existed. Now I'm part of a friendly community that shares common interests and like minded topics and all have one thing in common.

Happy holidays everyone thank you for keeping this community user friendly

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It's definitely a mixture of things. I personally believe, for me, it was having a loving mother, who literally waited on me hand and foot until my younger brother was born when I 14 months old. It makes sense to me that that is why I like the idea of roleplaying as a one year old. According to my mom I rarely cried and the moment she noticed that the balloons on my Luvs diaper dissappeared, she would change me. Once my brother was born she started being more put out and angry. She always yelled in my earliest memories about something, but deep down I knew that one day,before my brother was born, she loved me. Not only that, but I was sexually abused as a five year old by a neighbor. That probably made me want to regress more than any other factor.

Another thing I remember is that every cartoon had ABDL themed episodes. Literally every day there was an episode like "Baby Bottleneck", "Apes of Wrath", "Baby Puss", "Adventures in Greasersitting", Tiny Toons Adventure's Elmyra, Johnny Bravo being physically regressed and babied by his mom. How about  Ed,Edd and Eddy being hunted by the Kankers to either be diapered or Femdommed in various situations, not to mention other instances of diapers in that show like Sarah babysitting Jimmy or Johnny ending up in a diaper and sucking a pacifier in the prankster episode. I could literally go on and on,but you get the idea. ABDL got the most "fan service" in cartoons for some reason.....

I personally believe that if any child has an inkling to relive their babyhood, that the cartoons they view are a reinforcing device or mechanism to encourage that behavior. I know that seems farfetched, but that's just my opinion and how it worked for me. 

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I have no specific idea what causes the desire to wear diapers rather than underwear, regardless of being a DL or an AB, I do have some thoughts about it. Being a DL and speaking solely for myself, I have early memories starting as early as the age of two maybe three years old. In my opinion that is way too early to make conscious decisions. Therefor I think one must have had some sort of trigger event way before being able to remember when these events took place, or it is some sort of programming glitch in the old brain and we made some wrong path ways, my personal feeling goes with the last one.

True, some of our patterns and behavior can be seen, compared and addressed as addictive behavior. To me it is something that comes from deep within. With some of us it reveals itself at an early age and for some it takes longer, perhaps even in to their teens or young adulthood. Over the years I’ve read numerous stories on international fora. I never found some sort of pattern which pointed in a general direction for our desire and behavior. Some stories do have a lot of similarities, but once you start to dig deeper, the story are about as diverse as the world’s population.

In the end it is nothing you simply decide to do one day “Let’s slap on a diaper for it is such a cool thing to do”. I all fairness, a lot of us will or might be confronted with some very embarrassing situations in their diaper life, I know it happened to me. Situations which will make you think “what the hell am I doing” it might even trigger a new binge and purge cycle. After a while the embarrassment fades and the desire to wear diapers again will raise its ugly head again. The most of us if not all will give in to that feeling.

Not being able to beat the desire and slip back in this strange conduct certainly might qualify as addictive behavior, but not on the same level as smoking, alcohol or drugs. Like so many others I’ve met people whom were able to beat one of the other mentioned addictions. I’ve also met people whom were able to beat a drug or alcohol addiction, but failed to beat their diaper fetish or however you prefer to call it, it was / is part of their life. So yes by conduct and behavior it is an addiction but founded on a profound feeling coming from deep within making it a part of your personality. If that is the case, if it is really a part of your personality, changing it is next to impossible. Just my thoughts and feeling.

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On ‎12‎/‎14‎/‎2016 at 10:39 AM, me not you said:

What causes us to like what we like and do what we do. This question has been on my mind for a long time and have looked for answers but to no avail. Of corse its linked to some mental phenomenon but what really triggers it? Maybe abuse as a child, abandonment/lack of parents being present threw those early years, or perhaps something even deeper than that. If anyone has any knowledge or ideas that would be much appreciated.

So This is the exact question ive been trying to answer and find out for the last 10 years or so but I got some hints and to how it happens:

Since we all were born in diapers and raised also I think determines what diapers we like if we became ABDLs. Also I'm looking into if forced potty training/shaming potty training/bedwetting causes diaper fetishes to happen...Maybe those who are difficult to potty train just wanted to be in diapers a little longer or take a liking to the absorbent underwear?

From research, abdls often report having a wanting to regress or memorys of diapers from around potty training years or also those who found a liking to diapers around the time when they bedwetting(maybe it happened into puberty and that locks in that "like" in a sexual way.

But why isn't everyone having a diaper fetish? Maybe those people was more then happy to leave diapers when a better option was presented because of feeling "dirty" or "wet" was not a good feeling for those or that they were ready to leave diapers when potty training started to happen

Also its extimated that 1 in a 1000 are abdls in some form or another so that's something I found. 

 

Now if a child was given the option to stay in diapers for their life without shame or being forced to...Would they take the option? And if they did, what would they be like growing up? Would diaper fetishism surely happen? So many questions I still have I hope to solve for why abdl happens.

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Thank you all for the replies, I guess i might as well share my short story. I was the 2nd child (I have 1 older sister) when I was old enough to be away from my mother (when I was done with breast feeding) i went to a baby sitter with my sister. I have no memories from this time so sorry for no details. When my sister and I were toddlers we then went to some church run day care. I don't remember much of the early years there either other than that we were dropped off there at 7:30ish and picked up after dark most days and would go to bed soon after being home this went on until about 4th or 5th grade.the reason for this is that my parents both worked long days and had a farm to take care of. The daycare sucked, I had 1 friend at one point I had 2 but this is the way I've always been. As for my bit of time at home I guess it was alright all i really remember is work but I guess that has its benefits I now know how to do far more than most people my age and work for the maintenance department of the local school district and I'm only 20. As for where diapers come into all of this, I can't really remember any time when I was young that I wore diapers I literally have 1 semi clear memory of about 2nd grade on back. That single memory is when I was when I was just out of diapers I kept 1 that I hid under my trash can, that didn't last long. After that diapers didn't really come back into the pitcher until 3rd to many 5th grade. I would spend the night by myself at my grand mothers house on the family farm on the weekends. My grand mother wore diapers for as long as I can remember she's 90 now. I had i think three diapers of hers that I would weir back then and hide in the closet. After a year or 2 of that had ended (I never got caught) I then had no diapers until a few years ago when I bought a pack of depends flex fit at a local dollar general and as they say the rest is history. So with all of that said I have no clue of why I like diapers.

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On 12/19/2016 at 9:23 AM, BabyJune said:

Although it is nearly impossible to sum up the reasons in a short post, there are a couple of basic things that can cause someone to engage in infantilism, and they are polar opposite reasons. A bad childhood with abuse can cause a person to desire to "relive" a part of their childhood without the pain, thus they revert to a time when they remember (even subconsciously) a time when there was no pain. On the opposite end of the scale--which is my own experience--they had a wonderful childhood that they wished would never end. They seek out the same comfort by wearing diapers and dressing/playing a child of a certain age that gave them the most pleasure. Of course this is a generalization, and you will no doubt hear from others about their experiences as well.

This is how I feel as well

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I wonder this too. I had a fantastic up bringing. Literally no bad memories other than the usual fall outs etc. 

I have no memories of being out in or using nappies. But I DO remember being fascinated by my older sister's doll's nappies. I loved the feel, touch, texture of them. This is one of my earliest memories, and I myself was out of nappies by this point. 

More and more I think that there was no "trigger" moment or event for me: I think I was born with this "seed" inside me.  

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A good question that I have asked myself through the years; I too had a good bringing up, no abuse. Nothing but love. I had my first diaper curiosity at the young age of 8. I do not know what it was, I saw the diapers and I took one from my friends closet, would diaper myself at home that night and the rest is history. 

I do not drink nor do I do drugs, or smoke... my GF supports me in every way. I wear less these days but when  I do wear I enjoy every minute of the experience. Always have. 

Bottom line, do what we like as long as we are not hurting others. 

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lack of supportive parents *through* the years.... maybe... My dad made us wear pampers in the cornfields and helping on the farm in the early 70s... so.... I am sure it was that

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I am pretty sure my chronic nightly bedwetting as a kid and throughout my teens has a lot to do with my love of nappies now. When my bedwetting came back a few years ago I soon settled right back in to the habit

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Unfortunately mine is the typical abuse. I was sexually abused by my uncle from 4 until 9 years old. I had parents who had a child and shouldn't have. They where emotionally detached, physically and emotionally abusive.

Regressing with my better half is a release from a lot of things and a chance to feel what I didn't have back then.

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I have a theory. 

 

Most abdls are males because of the comfort diapers have on our crotch,penis, etc.

 

I believe that during early development there is an outside force that makes us uncomfortable. And while we are going through the sexual comfort stage like the anal and oral stage we find comfort in the diapers due to this discomfort that we face. I remember being as old as 5 and having this fetish. I enjoyed the sensation of warmth in my diaper when I peed. 

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I think what could have triggered it for me was something similar.  I had the unfortunate pleasure of having a UTI some time back, and the thing that stuck with me were my warm soaking wet pants.  Not long after being treated and cleared, I bought a pack of Depends and the rest is history.  I still do love that warm wet sensation.

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At the age of four, I somehow noticed it felt good to rub my penis on a diaper laying on the bed. I was humping the diaper. I later discovered that I had learned to Masturbate.

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I also wasn't abused or abandoned and I also lived in a normal family and was given a normal childhood. I was however always a target for meanness from different people. I was abused by other kids and by the school because I was different and not like the other kids. Is this what triggered it or was it some sensory thing I seeked out because I liked how diapers felt when I was little and the peeing in them? Or are we simply just born with it and we are just finding excuses to justify why we do it? 

I gave up on excuses a long time ago. We just like it. No need to justify. Plenty of people were bullied, abused, abandoned and lot of them don't turn to ABDL. 

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On 19/12/2016 at 7:03 AM, me not you said:

I guess i should have added that i am prefectly happy with the way i am, its just a point of curiosity 

Me to. I love my need for nappies and wouldn't want to be any other way. I am always curious as to what made me this way.

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I honestly have no clue. I just know that I like them and accepted that they are just part of who I am. One option nobody has considered......

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I had a great childhood and remember my mom and super affectionate babysitter always making sure I had a fresh diaper, and I can still remember how good it felt to poop in one then having more attention given after filling a big thick plastic diaper. I think part of us misses the attention and wants to relive that feeling that we miss as responsible adults. A friend of mine recently possibly converted a friend of his who had never worn a diaper as an adult before. He said his friend came over and hung out for a while then sometime later he convinced him to give it a try and layed him on his bed and fastened an AB diaper on him. He didn't take it off, and said that he wet and slept in it. They are just very comfortable and I think if there weren't such a stigma attached to it, many more would be wearing them too. Let's keep it a secret though. They're pricey enough and we don't need demand to go up ;)

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