Accepting who I am

[Diaperlover22]

Really feels good when you finally accept who you are as an AB/DL especially after the years of going through the binge and purge cycles. I used to be on this forum a while back and made a post claiming I would never go back to wearing diapers but then I would find myself still wanting to wear and I would even create new usernames on here and then when I would go through the binge purge cycle I would feel guilty and then claim I'm not going back and rinse and repeat but when you finally come to terms with the fact that this fetish is never going away you feel a lot better and a lot less stressed out. Just figured I'd share

[Pampertimmy]

It is very liberating once you come to accept this as a part of who you are. Good for you! I still keep this side of me quite private but knowing it's part of me and embracing my ab side has made my life a lot better.

[babystevie1987]

I sometimes think I'm weird and that it's not normal but then what is normal and it is harmless compare to what some people are doing. I feel great when I'm wearing. I would feel better if I could find a girl that likes this part of me and would like to try it to. I would love to go to a group of like minded people where we can be ourselves

[Pamperbum_uk]

[ldatsea]

your life gets so much easier when you can accept yourself,

[DiaperedAllTheTime]

I know for me I was so much more happier once I stopped repressing my feelings of being an adult baby/diaper lover.

[LittleMattyMoo]

It's a great feeling when you come to accept yourself as an AB. What else is a great feeling is when the people that you choose to spend time with also accept and encourage you to be yourself.

[darkpassenger42]

I have struggled with this off and on as well in the past and I'm happy that you reached a place where you feel comfortable about it.

For all of the younger people out there I will say that for me it gradually got easier as I got older. In my college years and early twenties I would tell my girlfriend about diapers and sometimes get a really negative reaction or it would end up being the end of the relationship and I think that made me psychologically uncomfortable about my fetish. As I got older and more mature (along with the women I was dating) I found it became easier and easier to talk about and for the most part people where more accepting of it.

[Diaperfraggel]

There is a very nice podcast about this issue called Dream a little (www.dreamalittlepodcast.com)

It is from a girl Lo, who is active on tumblr by the name DaddyIWantThis. She was in the same situation.

[TheBabyPants]

I accepted the need to wear diapers and watched it move into AB desires and finally DL.

[peterwetshisbed]

from Ireland and yes find it hard to accept the nappy part of me also

[Nat]

I no longer feel disgusted with myself for wearing them. Now it feels normal and I see diapers as a type of underwear. 

[gah!ghost]

I feel lucky in that I only went through the binge thing once. After years of looking at stuff in catalogs and then online I ordered some diaper samples in my early 20s. After getting them I kinda freaked out and threw everything I ordered out. It took another five or six years before I bought anything again and since then I have not felt the need to binge.

[DiaperedAllTheTime]

It is so much easier when you just give into your desires and wear diapers all the time.  I have heard people say that you become desensitized to them when you wear them all the time and honestly I do not feel that was the case in my life.  They do become a normal part of life and eventually you barely know you are wearing them.  I did not have to fight through binge and purge cycles as much as wanting to remove my diapers after having an orgasm.  That was something that took me years to overcome and honestly I cannot really tell you what changed to allow me to get past this roadblock. It takes an extreme amount of commitment at first but as time goes on it becomes easier and easier. Now that I am starting to experience control issues I feel very uncomfortable if I'm not wearing a diaper. It also takes some time for your body to adjust to the feeling of your diaper when wearing it all the time. For me I almost felt that I had to toughen up my skin in my diaper area as chafing was common when wearing for extended periods of time. Now I honestly never experience chafing. Honestly that has a lot more to do with the diaper and how you wear it which you quickly learn when wearing one all the time. Currently I'm the happiest I've ever been and I don't foresee waking up one day in deciding that I feel like taking my diapers off.   I completely accept that I'll probably wear diapers for the rest of my life.

[iluvmydiapers]

Giving in to the desire to wear diapers all the time is what I did years ago, I actually felt naked without a diaper on. I have gotten so used to wearing diapers that I some times forget and accedently undress in front of my  Coworkers in the locker room, luckily none of them have ever said a word to me about being in a diaper even when my diaper is noticeably wet. 

[robert3996]

So, when I was younger. I didn't tell no one. I tried holding a girlfriend without telling her. I felt as if I was lieing to her the whole time. From girl to girl I always felt as I was cheating or lieing to her cause I wasn't tell her bout my fetish. It is apart of me and something I love. I found fetlife  and met some doms and subs. A elderly domatrix sitting in a restaurant told me something that help me open up. Just cause you have a fetish doesn't make you less of a man or person. After hearing that I accepted it and yet I am not very open with it. It did help me. 

[stevewet]

Accepting I was incontinent and DL was the way forward for me.

[Galaxie 66]

As for me I guess I still haven't accepted it all the way ,it still feels like a dirty little thing I do that I should be ashamed of and I hate feeling that way .

I don't struggle with purging in the sense  of getting rid of all my diapers but at times I just get disscusted with myself and have to stop for a while .

I'm 52 now and have dealt with this since I was about 4 years old maybe someday I will feel a little more comfortable with myself.

Thank you all for being here it really helps knowing thair are others out there just trying to get through this diapered life to . 

[AbabeBill]

I too have come down the long road being a AB/DL, been liking diapers since the beginning, or since I could put any thought to it. Long before the internet, you were alone in your thoughts and having a thing for diapers. Up until my twenties, I only suspected others had similar thoughts. It wasn’t till then, when I found a magazine with some AB/DL content in it. The internet at this point, was still yet to come. 

But this was when I was taking my first steps, accepting that it was a part of me, and I wasn’t going to shake it. Now, I’m good with very much so. But, I still keep it, as a very well hidden secret from all my family and vanilla friends. The only one close to me who knows, is my wife. 

[ungulate]

Acceptance is best, because this will not change for me.  I am comforted by it, it is slightly spiritual and satisfying, and it has given me confidence to express myself.

I struggled until I was 40 with trying to manage vanilla relationships, or dabbling in kink communities.  I eventually just said "this is me, and there's not a DAMN thing wrong with it.

I started to tell people I dated (vanilla or kinky)in the first few dates, and it was matter of fact:. I told the woman I am currently with that I may NEVER be able to give her what she needs sexually.  I am ABDL, and that's it-- it defines my sexuality, my modality in the world, and is tied to my ways of coping in this world.

Instead of running like hell from a relationship that sounded very one-sided, she said "I'd be willing to try that." 

What started that night was one of the most beautiful ABDL relationships I have ever heard of or seen.  We went to the depths of this, and my loving partner found that the more she babied me, the more satisfied she felt.  We are BOTH extremely turned on when I get babyish. I would tell you some of the incredible experiences I have had with her, but this would start to look like porn, lol.

Suffice it to say, there is NOTHING she will not do... And she really likes to gently but firmly control me.

We are both in paradise, and have been for almost 5 years.

I feel like we need to do sexuality workshops, we are having the best time of our lives.  I'm not going to take that on, because it's too much work, lol, but please PM me if you want help navigating any relationship with this.

There is more than hope for us, we can have experiences that are beyond our wild dreams.

So don't settle.  And think twice before you say "I have to give and take in relationships." Babies just take, with honesty and an intense connection to their caregivers, and when ABDLs allow themselves to be selfish in this way, the caregiver is also in bliss.  If your partner is not feeling wonderful when you baby out with them, you are not quite there yet.  That's just my opinion, and I know other people may see this differently.

 

Anyway take care

[rusty pins]

I have log ago accepted I am a life long DL.  I became one when I was about 4 to 5 years old because I was diapered at night for bedwetting.  When I was growing up as a teen, there was no internet so I had no idea there were others who also likes wearing diapers.  It really helps to know there are thousands of people who like wearing diapers.  That doesn't mean I have to always feel good about it even though I accept it.  I've said many times that a person should have a good healthy balance between their AB/DL lifestyle and the real world.  Diapers may be on my mind a lot at times, but I actually wear only a few days a week and not for that long at a time.  I have a regular life outside of diapers and consider them as just one of my many interests, kind of like a hobby.  It can help people be accepting of themselves if they keep a few things in mind:

1.  There are thousands of normal people all over the world who like wearing diapers.  Clergymen, Police Officers, Teachers, Doctors, Military Men and Women, Construction Workers, Lawyers, Politicians, Store Clerks, people from all walks of life.

2.  It's really not any different from other sexual kinks.  Some people have a rubber fetish, a foot fetish, are into bondage, whips and chains, domination or other kinks.  Diapers are just another kink to many.

3.  It could be considered a vice, but wearing a diaper is not as bad as doing drugs, raping women, getting drunk all the time, and there are a lot worse things.

4.  You don't have to have your life revolve around diapers.  They will always be a part of you, deep down ingrained in your mind but just like anything, too much can be detrimental.  You don't always have to like how you feel about diapers.  Sometimes you will be thrilled and in Heaven when you are having diaper fun, then later you may feel disgusted at yourself for doing it.  That's normal, especially after sex or masturbation.  The diaper urges go away and you think, "I'm a disgusting person, wearing and wetting diapers at my age".  After a few days the interest will come back and you won't feel so down on yourself.

5.  Keep it in perspective.  You know you don't need or have to wear diapers but you enjoy it at times.  It's not the total of who you are as a person, just one part of you overall.  You're still the same person who has a good job, friends, maybe wife and kids and lots of hobbies and interests.  It's not really any different than the sexual play some couples do before sex.  "You be the school teacher and I'll be the naughty boy", or "Wear that skimpy French Maid outfit tonight!"  You have no idea what your friends do behind their own doors.  It may be a lot more kinky than wearing diapers.

Just remember the fetish will probably always be with you.  You don't always have to like it but there are times you will love it!  It can be a bit of a love hate relationship and you have to deal with it.  Accepting who you are and your interest in diapers is one step, but remember that diapers are just a small part of who you are over all.  Your still the great person you have always been.  You just happen to share a secret with thousands of others just like you.

[Bettypooh]

Excellent post

Even if you discover yourself going to 24/7 wearing, as long as you're not hurting anyone then acceptance will keep you from hurting yourself There is nothing you can't deal with in life, and handling anything begins with accepting what it is, what it does, and in cases like this what you are inside. We can be the greatest people on Earth, but only if we're true to oirselves and only when we've handled our problems well to that point. Accept yourself then move forward to a better (and wetter) life

Bettypooh