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I joined this site to connect to people. I've been feeling especially lonely lately and decided I'd really like to talk to some like-minded people, maybe even make a few friends. The problem with this is that I suffer from Avoidant personality disorder and Social Anxiety disorder. This makes it difficult sometimes to reach out and socialize. I want to....but at times my fear overwhelms me and I have to hold myself back. I have such feelings of shame and self loathing. I long to be with people, have friends, laugh and have adventures but I can't. I'm trying. At least I'm trying. I don't know how long I'll stay active on this site before what I call my "black cloud" overtakes me again. I'm just wondering if anyone else feels like this. Is there anyone else who has a disorder that makes it difficult, even painful, to be around people and interact with people? Is there anyone else who doubts their own self worth so much that they actively avoid relationships?

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You've very brave, lilmissmommy, and the fact that you are not only here but would post this shows how much you don't want to be like that. Just remember you do have self worth, and people here will always remind you of it if you ever forget :)

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No idea if I have any disorder but I am shy and a few other things to. All I know is I need to make ABDL friends online and in person if possible. It just freaks me out to even attempt a get together with people whom I don't know much about if anything. I'm more comfortable about women then men so making guy friends who are ABDL is going to be really hard or not possible for me. I used to be at a point where I shut everything out but I'm passed loathing. I want to know what it's like to not hide who I am around others. All I know is what I know I should do and what I should do to make it happen. If you need a person to talk to I'm a good listen and advice giver.

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I think I have some kind of anxiety disorder as well. I always stutter and stammer when talking, even with people I'm comfortable around. It drives me crazy, and I don't know how to stop it. I feel like all the words are spinning around in my head on a roulette wheel, and I'm having to try to pick them in the correct order so that I can talk. My friend at work thinks my brain is thinking too fast for me to keep up with my mouth, but I disagree. I wish I could go on an anti-anxiety medication to see if it helps me or not.

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I'm sure to have some name for my similar problem which is a bit different. I love people but I'm socially inept so I tend to avoid larger people-connections preferring to be around only one or a few whom I like. The internet is a boon for me (and I hope you too) because here I can be with lots of people yet not have to deal wuith any part of that which I don't want to :) It's helped me deal with this.

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Thank you so much everyone for your words of encouragement! Makes me feel like there is hope in the future for finding friends and making positive connections. I feel like this might be the right place for me to do that. :)

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