Wife's Diapers

[WifeinDepends]

Over the past few months, my wife has developed both fecal and urinary incontinence tied to medical issues she's had. In short, she began wetting (complete flood) and her BMs occur as a very VERY sudden urge to poop. After several devestating accidents and doctor visits she made the decision to wear diapers. She chose Depend adjustable underwear. And despite feeling guilty as hell about it, I LOVE that she's in diapers. I loved holding her on my lap to comfort her crying when she wore her first Depend and I just about lost it when just 10 minutes into putting it on she flooded it with pee and needed a change. I've long had a pantyhose fetish and love that my wife wears both sheer pantyhose and tights in an effort to compress and hide her diapers - she just looks so adorable with those frilly white Depends under her pantyhose top. And I really love it when I'm around when she poops. Last week she was standing in our bathroom getting ready in nothing but black sheer pantyhose, a white bra, and her Depend, the top of which was sticking out of her pantyhose waistband. She was irresistable but before I could get her to our bedroom she began to take her morning poop. It was incredible hearing the squishing/crackling and seeing her Depend actually bulge momentarily as her tiny body (105 pounds) pushed a massive load of poop into her diaper. I thought it'd be hard to poop while wearing pantyhose, but there seemed to be no problem - her diaper bulged then the bulge dropped down into her diaper, then again a bulge. She had me get a plastic shopping bag and by the time I returned she had her pantyhose down and had a seriously poop-filled Depend folded up and ready for the trash bag. I always thought she emptied her diaper into the toilet but she said "I spend a fortune on disposable diapers, so I want to throw them away, not clean them!" The wipes too went in the bag and before long she had a fresh Depend taped on and was carefully tugging her black pantyhose up and over it. She couldn't believe the sex we had 5 minutes later when I returned from putting her Depend in the dumpster!

So I'm torn between how upsetting this process had been for her and how incredibly sexy it is to have her in diapers. Seeing her in her tan skirt and sexy tan sheer Hanes was good, seeing her in the same outfit but having her burst into tears because she just pooped again and forgot to pack enough Depends is heartbreaking and erotic at the same time. I love my wife and want to help her. Her diapers don't seem that great, and I'm sure I need to give her even more reassurance that she's beautiful, despite the diapers. Any advice on diapers (thin is what she's after - would XL baby disposables work?) And dealing with enjoying my wife's misfortune is aplreciated...

[nick_1494]

Hey, I'm not really sure what to say about your guilt but sizing wise it depends on waist size, I have a 22 inch waist and I comfortable fit into a babies diaper, but it depends where you are. I live in Ireland and the sizes could be different

[WifeinDepends]

Thanks Newborn...I surprised her with a package of Pampers 6 diapers this afternoon when she got home from work. She was skeptical, but agreed to try them. The tapes are stretchy enough to fit her well, and the pantyhose she was wearing offered additional support. I made her a nice big cup of hot cocoa and waited....she wet while still sitting in the kitchen then we went in the bathroom. Even looking thru her hose you could tell she was VERY wet, but no leaks and no leaks on the second wet diaper a few minutes later. Wife likes the fit but not the cartoon characters and is leery about "whether it will hold in the mess?" The next time she has a BM. She usually has a poop sometime after supper so we shall see...

[diapertime42]

If she has complete incontinence, bladder and bowel, Depends seem a little weak for that... There are ALOT better disposables than those.. check out the diaper review section here.

[Mischa]

I'm incontinent and a DL, so I can give you pointers from both sides.

For you:

You seem to be going about this in an intelligent way, in fact, if you play your cards right, your enthusiasm might let her see it's not all bad, just take it easy.

For her:

Being incontinent is nothing to be ashamed of. Some minor diet and lifestyle adjustments will lessen the impact of incontinence on your daily life. There are several members here that have incontinence that live their lives without fear. Nobody can hear your diaper, and they're easily hidden. I worked for four months at a Walmart and 99% of my coworkers knew and only 2 of my supervisors did, but only because one was the interviewer who hired me on, and the other was a sort-of confidant. I would actually suggest she join here, we're like a big bowl of muesli, some nuts, some fruits, a few flakes, but all around a very healthy bunch! If she's iffy about joining, do what I did....this isn't my real name, and this email is only set up for diaper stuff. If you're willing to buy slightly bigger pants, the diapers will be hidden. As for not having enough diapers, that will happen at first until you understand your body's rhythms. I've had times where I've ran out of my diapers while I was out, luckily I had one of my boyfriend's in my purse, it sucked, but it held for the hour or so till I was able to get home.

As for finding better diapers........really any diaper that is readily found in stores.....THEY.....SUCK....and not in the good Hoover way.....in the bad Chicago Bears way....I'd highly suggest going with either Abena S1/M1s or a thinner Molicare. If she is concerned about absorbency, there may be no choice but to go for a thicker diaper. In that case, I would recommend the Abena S3/M3 depending on her waist size. Baby diapers are not very good for adults, yes they'll hold adult pee, and if you're lucky, an adult-sized poop, but they are not designed for adults, and will end up leaking, probably catastrophically. Thinness doesn't always equal discretion, on the other hand, thinness may very well lead to more chances of leaking.

[WifeinDepends]

Thanks, Mischa, for all the helpful advice! The good news is that the Pampers experiment went ok tonight....my wife and I were in the kitchen cleaning up after dinner when she looked worried and said "oh oh...here it comes...". I hustled her into the half bath off the kitchen as I wanted to watch. I lifted her skirt and looked at her bottom. It actually looked like someone's fist pushing through her diaper and when she finished it looked like her Pampers were really sagging into her pantyhose, but it held the load! I told her how cute her butt looked in her new diapers and kissed her - she seemed annoyed and just wanted to change, which she did.

Despite the success, I will check out the diapers you mention for her, I saw Tenas on amazon..but they're very pricey and she pees/craps ALL the time. But she's worth it.. I actually suggested cloth and she got really upset - she does NOT want to give up her disposables, no matter what they cost. Thanks again!

[Mischa]

Amazon diapers are overpriced

go to www.xpmedical.com

[warpiper]

You should likely be buying by the case, and the best prices that I have found recently are www.cheapchux.com, and http://www.northshorecare.com/ is in northern chicago so that might be closer.

Get some samples of a few different kinds, like tena, tranquility, abena, wellness, and see what works best. There are people at northshorecare that are incontinence experts that can help you select different products depending on need.

[fillemup]

I also recommend xp medical and Abena diapers. Using baby diapers for a small adult will only marginally work. For best comfort and security against leaks, you should go with a properly sized adult diaper.

[WifeinDepends]

Thanks for all the advice - I've ordered her some Molicare's, but she seems to be doing well with the Pampers. In fact, she's been through a ton of packages of them already - I've counted 5 big garbage bags full of her used Pampers that I've hauled down to the apartment dumpster for her - and they missed a dumpster pickup, so I'm running out of room in the dumpster! She's spening a fortune on diapers though - sure wish she'd agree to wear cloth. She'll actually quickly change a wet diaper if she thinks she feels a bowel movement coming on because she only wants to poop in a clean diaper. Like the other morning before church, she was running around in the off white sheer pantyhose I'd given her for Christmas. She didn't have her skirt on yet, so I just stood in the bathroom with her, admiring her sexy hose. She paused from doing her hair and looked down at her diaper - through the semi-sheerness of the top of her white pantyhose you could her Pampers quickly swell with yellow pee. "I have to change this - I think I'm going to #2 soon..." she said. "Why not save the cost of diaper and go in that one?" I asked. "Yuck!" was her only response, and she tossed her wet Pampers in the trash and pulled her pantyhose up carefully over her fresh Pampers. "I love these pantyhose you got me - Hanes Silk Reflections are my favorite!" She looked so incredible I embraced her and kissed her. I caressed her silky hose-covered little butt and patted her Pampers. Her stomach gurgled.."Here it comes". I kept my hand on her butt as she took a truly massive dump - it was sexy feeling her fill her diaper. But I looked in the mirror and saw that her Pampers had leaked and there was poop on her hose covered thigh! She started crying as a second wave of poop hit and her thigh got really soiled. I helped her change - carefully. Instead of trying to wash her new pantyhose she decided to flush them down the toilet. The messy diaper I put in the bag with the wet ones and took to the garbage along with a bunch of wipes. We still made it to church, but she wore tan pantyhose - I never got to see her in her nice white ones . Hopefully the new diapers will prevent her from soiling any more nice pantyhose.

[Guest]

Also, check your local thrift stores, I always find good deals on good diapers, recently I've scored some tranquilitys for $4 a pack at my local Goodwill, though, I've done better, purple Molicares for $2 a pack at Value Village.

[Mischa]

WifeInDepends

We warned you that baby diapers aren't cut out for adults, there'll only be more leaks. Adult diapers will also hold more, and the better ones will wick the wetness into the middle of the diaper, making her feel drier.

[babbler110]

I have bladder incontinence due to MS and find using two different brands of diapers helps a lot. I use Molicares at night since the do hold a lot of urine but are not very good for the day since the absorbent material in the Molicare breaks apart when wet. During the day I use a much thinner L3 Abena which stands up well to multiple wettings.

One brand of diaper may not be suitable for all the time.

best of luck to you.

[Jilly Poo]

I have a suggestion.

[DiaperBoy666]

i use

[ItchyTasty]

Hey, I'm not really sure what to say about your guilt but sizing wise it depends on waist size, I have a 22 inch waist and I comfortable fit into a babies diaper, but it depends where you are. I live in Ireland and the sizes could be different

[choctawboi]

I'm 20, 5'6", 110 lbs, and have a 27" waist....which is profoundly skinny...so having a 22" waist is unbelievable. Like seriously...i don't believe it

[Angela Bauer]

When fitting diapers, waterproof pants and pull-ups, it is the larger of the hips or waist measurement that is important. Also, consider the measurement around the upper thighs at the largest point.

[Honu]

Have you tried buying diapers through an FSA account? Since your wife has a medical need, all you should need is a doctor's certification of her medical need for diapers and should be able to purchase them with pre-tax income. It's not free, but it will save you a little. It's her issue to manage and it'll be her choice to switch to cloth if and when the time comes. If "you pay the dues and she drinks the booze" then she won't have much motivation to do the little bit of work that comes with cloth. Good luck and keep in mind that the only thing you can count on is change. She has every right to change her mind about how she manages this and it is your emotional support that is most important.

[diapers4me.]

You should likely be buying by the case, and the best prices that I have found recently are www.cheapchux.com, and http://www.northshorecare.com/ is in northern chicago so that might be closer.

Get some samples of a few different kinds, like tena, tranquility, abena, wellness, and see what works best. There are people at northshorecare that are incontinence experts that can help you select different products depending on need.

I ordered this from northshorecare.com

[dl_ashlee]

I ordered this from northshorecare.com

[Creepymouse]

Another thing that might help is a so-called 'bowel management' routine. Something to help clean her out in the morning so she's less likely to make a large mess for a few hours at least. Plus, it lets her take care of that business in the toilet if she wishes, which would certainly be more comfortable for her, if not as exciting for you. Enemas and liquid suppositories are options, and I'm sure some would suggest chlorophyll or activated charcoal tablets for any odors.

[ItchyTasty]

I'm 20, 5'6", 110 lbs, and have a 27" waist....which is profoundly skinny...so having a 22" waist is unbelievable. Like seriously...i don't believe it

[DiaperPony]

The way he writes makes me think it is just a fiction. He responds then launches into a overly descriptive blow by blow of what happened, always getting into way too many sensual or humiliating details. If it was a real situation it wouldn't be described in the same way... it'd be a one or two liner "we're trying depends", "now we're trying pampers", "pampers leaked, trying molicare". Actually, I doubt Pampers would even be tried in a real situation. The doctor would have probably told them what to use also, and she'd probably stick to that. In any case, it was an enjoyable, if incredible, story.

[fillemup]

The way he writes makes me think it is just a fiction. He responds then launches into a overly descriptive blow by blow of what happened, always getting into way too many sensual or humiliating details. If it was a real situation it wouldn't be described in the same way... it'd be a one or two liner "we're trying depends", "now we're trying pampers", "pampers leaked, trying molicare". Actually, I doubt Pampers would even be tried in a real situation. The doctor would have probably told them what to use also, and she'd probably stick to that. In any case, it was an enjoyable, if incredible, story.

I think you may have hit the nail on the head. I am also a little skeptical as to weather or not this topic is fiction or true.