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Sissy Origins


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In the other forums, we have talked about how we became DLs or ABs, but I have not seen a topic on how we became sissys, so I thought I would post the question here.

For me I am not really sure how it started for me. I know I began dressing up in my mother's clothes at a similar age where I started thinking about girls, which I strongly regret now, because I was never given permission to do that. By then I already had a diaper fetish, so things kind of took off from there. Somehow, cross-dressing turned into a prop to further humiliate myself, thereby enhancing my diaper fetish. Its possible my curiosity may have gotten the best of me, but I was hoping other sissys here could help shed some light on this by describing their own personal experiences.

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I wish I could really explain it myself. It's something that grew little by little over the years only propelled to a higher level by Sophie's cookies.

I've always envied girls for their beauty, clothing, etc. Something deep inside me just kept telling me that I want to be a girl.:girl_happy:

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I told you not to swallow that phone!!

Oops! I thought you said "donuts follow that home." :doh: I was wondering what you meant. :huh: Just thought that you were going :screwy:

Darn! I knew I should have turned it off before swallowing. I hope my diaper catches it all intact and in working order. When it comes out, I'll call you. :whistling:

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Ever since I was very young I noticed that girls always got "preferential" treatment. They were cuddled more and not expected to play sports, compete, or do anything else that could lead to injury. Also, my grandmother always taught me to respect women--more than men, for some reason. Then, of course, I noticed that girls' clothing had more detail and variety; it seemed more fun to wear a frilly dress and fancy-up one's hair than it did to pull on a pair of pants and a shirt and whip a comb across my head. In school, girls never seemed to get in trouble like boys. They were more gentle and most of them never cursed or roughnecked. I fit in with their nature more than I did with the boys. All my life I've wanted to have children, but I have more "mommy" feelings than I do "daddy" feelings. As a matter of fact, I planned to adopt and would have adopted a girl if I could have. But now I've passed the age (cutoff age is 42) to adopt an infant, and I don't think I could afford an adoption and raise a child. To sum it up, I think the "sissy appeal" for me is in the cute, delicate clothes and being to tune into a softer nature. I'm not competitive or aggressive.

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I think these are some interesting responses. I hope we get some more people to express themselves here.

I never had the desire to be a women, so I still don't know what triggered it. I do like frilly dresses, but usually only during diaper play.

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I started wearing in my pre-teen years. I wanted to dress as a girl even earlier, but was unable to. I did get to dress up at halloween one year in elementary, but mom made me wear jeans under my dress which made me upset. I wear panties full time now, when I'm not wearing a diaper.

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For me it was combining crossdressing with diapers .Also being an AB i just progressed from there into frilly dresses .But i do still like my girl clothes ! :thumbsup:

Me too, basically. I developed a love for diapers first, crossdressing second. I wrote long blog entries on both subjects.

Still I'm much more a fan of the naughty little schoolgirl sissy that needs to be put back in diapers (maybe with a spanking involved) than I am a fan of the pinafores, petticoats, rhumba panties, etc. I think that's because as far as diapers go I'm more of a DL than I am an AB.

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The first six years of my life all I wore was girl clothes, because they were hand-me-downs from my older sister. Even after my baby brother (3 years younger) was born my mother always did the same thing. She would put me in my sisters underpants and a pair of shorts and tell me if I could stay dry I could be dressed as a boy that day. By the end of breakfast I had peed in the panties and was diapered and dressed as a baby girl. To my mother it was a means of humiliating me. To me it was security and safety. Nobody beat me when I was dressed as a baby girl. So now, when I need to feel safe, I need to be a sissy.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Jason asks, "how did we become sissies"? The same kind of question is asked by gays, "why am I gay"?

After a lot of years, acting the drama myself, reading up everyone and anyone's opinions, doing counselling course at local college here in Leeds, and above all wondering why I am gay but have no interest in dressing myself, but an all consuming interest in SOMEONE ELSE dressing, I have come to a few conclusions, some of them reluctantly.

Every male-by-birth I've met, (and that must run to a thousand or so) whether gay or sissy, t/gurl, crossdresser, nice-boy, nancy-boy, or even dead straight -- choose your own phrase -- has in point of fact been absolutely NORMAL in physical terms. Same range of dick-size, same range of body types from weedy to athletic to muscle-Mary, same range of intelligence, memory etc.

What's more, there is NO WAY that a male whether normal, fetish, gay or any other persuasion THINKS like a woman. I ought to say this twice I reckon it's so important, and to me, bleedin' obvious. Not only does she/he not think like a woman, she/he does not relate to other people in any way remotely like a woman, especially OTHER WOMEN.

Right now I want to apologize to those reading who are upset by these words. I'm certain some WILL be upset, but the only way to really answer the question posed by Jason is to accept that kind of truth that is unpleasant/unpalatable, as some truths just are.

After all the years of wondering, investigating, reflecting, it seems to me the answer to Jason's question lies in one's own infancy. Infancy seems to be where/at what time the roots of the swing away from the norm happened. And sexual change at one's puberty heavily re-inforces that swing away from the norm.

The central component in one's personality and sexuality seems to lie with one's relationship with ONE'S MOTHER. And the absence or presence of a father is also an incontrovertible factor. But mainly, for a boy, it is the mother.

The mother in these situations seems to be dominant, or domineering, or even fighting to BE dominant in the family's relationships. Under such circumstances, a little boy can come to admire his mother so much (and maybe despise his father if he is around) that he WANTS TO BE LIKE HER. So getting hold of, and dressing up in mummy's clothes to an infant boy will seem like the way to do it. Imitation, imitation, imitation.

But for some boys (like me) the opposite reaction can happen, when the mother is seen as reprehensible, a trouble-causer in the case of mother fighting for dominance, NOT TO BE COPIED UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE. The kind of person to be avoided. How unfortunate and ironic it is then, that mother's characteristics still show years later in that very same boy! How neatly this explains my own fascination with t/gurls and why I'm gay.

As usual with human nature, there are no "rules" about things like this, not all will fit the pattern, plenty reading this will think 'load of bollocks here'. There's just too many variables to give a pat, hard-and-fast, answer to the big question posed by Jason.

And once again, sincere apologies to anyone upset with what could be brutal truth.

Daddy Fred.

p.s. I've agonized whether to just wipe this lot and not publish. But then I thought, if it helps someone to be a bit calmer, relaxed about her/his situation, then it IS worthwhile, even if it brings condemnation down upon my head.

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There is no need to apologize Daddy Fred. There is no drama here, just curiosity. You actually bring up an interesting perspective and this 'could' be the case with me. Though my mother was never really strict (worse she ever did was slap my face a few times), she was definitely the enforcer between my parents. My father was different in that he trusted me to complete things like homework on my own and ask for help if I needed it. Of course, my father held me accountable, but he would not ask everyday did you finish your school work, did you feed the dogs, etc. Incidentally, my personality is actually a composite between my mother's and father's personality, which is normal. What is even more interesting is my career choices are about half way between my father's and mother's career choices (That is a bit difficult to describe without going into specifics).

So do I imitate my mother, some, but definitely not 100%. It is more like 50%, so I can't say that I fit into your extreme. Perhaps though, since I wanted to be like both my parents and looked up to both of them, that I would try to fit into both their shoes literally, but I never really thought of fitting into my father's shoes, because his clothes were similar to mine, thus I am left with my mother's clothes. Nah, that does not make a whole lot of sense. Not saying I am rejecting it though.

On the other hand, I have always been shy around the ladies mostly because of my diaper fetish (I did develop my diaper fetish before my sissy clothes fetish). Still though, I was curious about the girls around puberty so I thought I would check out my mother's underwear drawer (of course I regret it). Somehow though, I got a sexual thrill from it (I don't know how, perhaps it was the naughtiness of it), and it took off from there. I think this makes more sense, but it does not quite answer all the questions yet such as why did I get a sexual thrill from it and why is Disney Princess attire so appealing. Those are just some of the unanswered questions I still have.

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i would like to thank daddy fred for his post, i found it quite insightful as i can relate my own experiences with what you said. in my own specific case, my father died when i was 5 years old so i did not have a strong male presence in my life that i admired. my sister and i were very close siblings having endured much fighting and drama from our parents at early ages. i do not remember my parents together at all as they separated when i was only 2. You see, my father was bi-polar and had attempted to kill himself several times, with my mother interfering and saving his life on a couple of occasions. my sister even witnessed a couple of the incidents. one incident put our entire family in danger and my mother was forced to leave my father for our own safety, leaving us with literally next to nothing money because my father controlled all of the money. i have always revered my mother as one of the strongest human beings i have ever met because of the horrors she has lived through and persevered through in order to keep me and my sister safe and give us the best life she could. apparently during this time, my mother was not around very often trying to occupy herself with everything she could to avoid her husband and the stress he caused. and my sister took the initiative to be the best biggest sister she could and had a very large influence in my developing years. this put my father into an even bigger depression having lost his family and eventually he succeeded in ending his life, on his own terms, away from his family when i was 5. throughout my childhood i had a bad bed wetting problem, but i had always refused to wear diapers wanting to keep whatever pride i had. my mother remarried to a man that my older sister and i hated, who had 2 daughters of his own from a previous relationship. one of his daughters is physically handicapped and lives with her mother full time and occasionally visited for a few weeks at a time. her older sister acted as a full time babysitter and took care/raised her sister when she was at home.

my mother had always taught me to respect women, and growing up seeing the horrible things men have done to women through out history and situations that good honest people can be left in by greedy men instilled this deep anger towards the Male gender. When i was about 12 my chore was to do the entire family's laundry, around the same time i stopped wetting the bed. you see, my handicapped stepsister was mentally slow and had a brain function to the equivalint to a 2 year old when she was 8, (not by choice, although i know some AB's would wish it was them :P) and wore diapers for most of her life. wanting to be as grown up i could be i feared to be put back in diapers and taught my self to stop bed wetting when threatened with diapering, knowing that when my step sister visited, there was always a supply. once i had stopped i was proud of myself indeed, but, a strange curiosity filled me when i lay in bed trying to fall asleep over the months following. "i wonder what it would actually feel like if i had to wear a diaper again." i shrugged it off and pretend the thought never crossed my mind. eventually over the weeks and months and curiosity getting the best (or worse?) of me i had this urge to fulfill deep inside. i had tried stuffing blankets in my underwear or wearing A LOT of pairs of underwear at once to try and simulate the effect. upon my attempts at makeshift diapers, i had discovered how great playing by yourself could feel for the first time, and have heavily relied on diaper stimulation ever since then. but eventually blankets just weren't enough. "maybe if i tried it once, just to see what my fate could have been. its not like anyone would find out." i had just needed it for me. one summer holiday night when my step sister was visiting i had sneaked one of the diapers from her bag to my room. i waited to everyone was in bed and slipped it on. i was instantly incredibly aroused and all i can remember was the wave of pleasure that shot over me, and that i was shaking from either nervousness, fear, or excitement. i never USED the diaper but since it was one of the pull up style ones i had kept it as clean as i could for as long as i could and would wear it as often as i could at night without being caught. the next time she would visit i would smuggle a couple out during the weeks and make them last. during this time i was stuck doing the laundry for my entire family twice a week. one of those fateful laundry nights i was watching a new TV program called "he's the lady" or something like that, where they took the manliest man they can find, and cross dress them and put them on a reality tv program to see who can be the best at being a woman. the ultimate of all male challenges. (so they advertised) and as i watched this program, having recently discovered my new found secret love for diapers, i came up with the brilliant idea. "hey, i wonder what girl clothes feel like." and when a 12 year old boy who is home alone with entire wardrobes at his disposal, and way too much curiosity, well, suffice to say i found out what it felt like. :P

once the pleasure had subsided an enormous wave of guilt would wash over me and force me to panic and return to my boyish ways. in order to camouflage these thoughts and feelings i walled my self off from my friends by being overly aggressive and tried to make my self look as intimidating as possible. Long shoulder length hair, Band Tshirts, Black jeans, chains. i wanted to be one heavy metal dude, because no one would suspect a guy like that to feel the way i did. it wasnt really until that age when i began discovering the truth behind my parents marriage and how it ended and how my father died, on top of living under the roof of hypocrit,lying, theiving, asshole that i became depressed and the only thing that would make me smile was when i was dressed up. so i believe i became a sissy to try and fix a hole in my life.

over the course of high school, i had a sense of self loathing because i felt so different and alien to everybody else. that there was no way anybody i was going to meet would have even close to the same experiences i had or same kinky hobby. it wasnt really until near my end of high school that i started to lighten up and began making friends again. being a sissy still made me sad because i felt so different and alone, but when i was in the mind set of my sissy self, it felt like one of the only good sensations left in my life at all. so here i am. out of high school with a love for diapers and all things pink, frilly, and disney (although ill never admitt it out loud) and a big big big world in front of me. i have only recently mustered up enough courage and will to share my story with anyone for the first time. ive never really told any one person that entire story, but when i saw this thread and saw what daddy fred posted, i felt i might give it the ol college try and admit to the digital world that i think i love being a diapered little girl and wish i wasnt ashamed of it.

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Technically I am TG ... but I don't like the concept of gender so I take on the less gender specific "sissy" title because it's about the cuteness not the status for me. ;)

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  • 2 weeks later...

I realized something today : a lot of my sissy behaviors come from feeding off negative attention, something I learned growing up. I will have to expand on this later when I have a real computer to type on.

Basically after my brother was born, he started getting all the attention. The best way for me to get attention was by having accidents. As I grew older the pattern continued - I would get attention when I did something bad, but when I was good, my parents would focus on my "problem child" brother.

Naturally as I got older that became my default sexual style. I expected to be called names and humiliated... Getting positive attention was foreign to me.

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For me it started when i was little, i would wear my moms pantyhose etc. I always related this to the fact that im Bi/gay but as i got older i started to wear panties and thongs ( hence my name ) I shave everything from the waist down and when i tan its in a thong. I recently have been ordering from nicediapers . com and everything is either pink or very frilly. Love it. My sissy side is starting to show more and more everyday and i am really ok with it. I just may have to change from AB to Sissy we will see.

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I realized something today : a lot of my sissy behaviors come from feeding off negative attention, something I learned growing up. I will have to expand on this later when I have a real computer to type on.

Basically after my brother was born, he started getting all the attention. The best way for me to get attention was by having accidents. As I grew older the pattern continued - I would get attention when I did something bad, but when I was good, my parents would focus on my "problem child" brother.

Naturally as I got older that became my default sexual style. I expected to be called names and humiliated... Getting positive attention was foreign to me.

My 'beginnings' were very similar, Jen ... my sister (half-sister) was born when I was 5 and of course all the attention went to her. I'd just started school as well which, for a 5yo, is an alien environment so you need attention when you get home but i didn't really get any. So, i found myself wishing i was her/that i was a baby.

(I have very vivid memories of standing on a step, looking into the cupboard which had all the baby things ... plastic pants, baby powder, cloth diapers and pins and the intoxicating smell & feel of the plastic pants)

As she grew up she still was "the favorite", getting all the positive attention. Being jealous/fed up of that I tried several times trying to get her into trouble which always back-fired - i found my parents left a tape recorder in her room and recorded me teaching her naughty words - so all I got was either negative attention and/or punished.

Years later I found that when I was a baby both my parents worked and i was left with relatives so i never bonded with pretty much anyone in my family and was, before i found this out, somewhat resentful.

In my mid/late teens i spent a couple of years reading sexual psychology books to try to understand myself, especially where the 'wanting' humiliation/embarassment etc - and an emerging want for bondage etc - had come from but never found it. Recently, a friend said that it was likely that all i wanted/want now is some attention.

It is quite possible that people who do not get the "right amount"/positive attention in their lives may have part of their persona become stuck at a younger age and it could become a problem (perhaps) as years pass.

Regarding the humiliation etc, personally this has gotten stronger & stronger in me over the years - maybe from not finding someone to be a 'parent'/dominant etc or maybe that i haven't accepted myself as an ab/"something". (I did have a Dominant for a while a number of years ago and said one time after we played that i could see a day when i didn't need to "do this stuff any more", i.e. that it might be a way for my 'inner child' to heal. Unfortunately things didn't work out for us.

I will say though that the ... need/desire for the (negative) attention i.e. humiliation/degradation etc has the possibility to become destructive as one could become masochistic or very depressed - or both.

Sorry for the long blurb. Jens' post brought out a need, i guess, in me to share how things started for me.

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From what i remember i was about 13 and had just been shopping with my mum i remember i was always a bit more feminine then the other boys in my school and would prefer to hang out with the girls discussing hair styles and stuff. whilst out shopping i remember noticing the girls clothing was much more exciting and interesting than the boys and i slipped a pink pair of shorts into my pile of cloths to try on. in the changing room i stood there in the pink shorts looking at myself in the mirror, then a few days later i was at a friends house and i told her how much i loved her cloths and told her about trying on the shorts the week before, before i realized we were having a fashion show in her bedroom trying on her cloths, that was about 12 years ago and i am still good friends with the girl and we laugh about it even today, and she keeps saying we should do it again, but she is bit smaller then me now so i would have to use my own girlie cloths..........

Loving the comments so far and hope to read some more peoples memories soon

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I honestly think it was the higher variety of clothes. Also having stuffed animals, and being dependent on someone of authority is less out of the norm if you're a girl. Males tend to be expected to grow up, lead and fight. Girls are more permissive to fall back, follow, and care for others. My whole like for this silly realm of girlyness started about 4 years ago. It wasn't something that started when I was young. Also, diapers under skirts, dresses and nighties look very cute!

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  • 4 months later...

For me it was combining crossdressing with diapers .Also being an AB i just progressed from there into frilly dresses .But i do still like my girl clothes ! :thumbsup:

Thats pretty much goes for me too!!! I just have this thing for petticoats and diapers, they just seem to go together for me. What better way for me to wear them both, but as a french maid!! So that makes me a sissy cd, and a happy one at that!!!

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A few so-called "sissies" when they look more closely at it, usually in comparison to me, find that they are "girl" while a smaller number are just confirmed in their sissy-ness. I am very uncomfortable in this forum and cannot relate to it. If you read my blog on the matter

http://www.dailydiap...&showentry=1578

specific steps were taken to see to it that I would not be sissified and that I would know "when" and not be conflicted and I am comfortable as either gender at different times. Yes, I am ready for some football and was not known to be absent when it was time for the fight

See also

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Fairyhopper

I would love to see the Adult Kid forum get sub-forums Little Boy and Little Girl. Over at Wetville there were sucn. The Boys' Tree House and the Girls' Doll House. Although the "AB" component (diapers and rubber panties, wetting and the like) is all girl. In fact, boys that exhibited an interest in that kind of thing while trying to be boys were considered sissies since the nursery was pretty exclusively feminine. I relate to my dolls as a girl

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A few so-called "sissies" when they look more closely at it, usually in comparison to me, find that they are "girl" while a smaller number are just confirmed in their sissy-ness. I am very uncomfortable in this forum and cannot relate to it. If you read my blog on the matter

http://www.dailydiap...&showentry=1578

specific steps were taken to see to it that I would not be sissified and that I would know "when" and not be conflicted and I am comfortable as either gender at different times. Yes, I am ready for some football and was not known to be absent when it was time for the fight

There are quite a few perspectives. I think masochism plays the largest role for me here, but other forms of attention including affection can come from this type of play, which I think is one of the reasons it is so good.

I think most of us sissies/little girls are only so part-time. It is important to point out being a sissy or a little girl does not necessarily reflect on the rest of our lives or our characteristics (mental or physical). This is certainly true with me.

I am actually happy how this thread has taken off and I have valued everyone's input even if you are not a sissy.

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How many times do I have to say the attempt to link sissy and Little Girl ("sissy/little girl") is incorrect? 15 years ago, "Sissy" was virtually unknown and Little Girl was, so sissy is new. "Femdom" was. As I understand, from both what is said and how things are said, the "girl treatment" in Sissy is part of humiliation and Masochism. For us there is no sucn connection. Find and read a Little Girl forum and the discussion is totally different. So please, speak for only yourself and your world, I will speak for mine. Cris can tell you, having dealt with me more closely and petti30 can tell you from the same. Both made different decisions upon exposure to full out Little Girl. When I was with the Girltalk to girls and imported the tiara fance, they took right to it, often acquiring 3 or more tiaras. I was a writer for Knuffles: the Magazine. The only reason we kind of broke relations was that I kept my diaper interests as part of my girlness. The others like Vickie, Sally-Jane and Krystina separated their AB elements from their LG elements and I could not do that. In fact, their "baby" seemed not to have a specific gender. Then too I was the eldest Little Girl and one of the oldest members. there were a couple of others near my real age such as June Flowers, but they functioned as adutls (she ran the New Blooms school). So I was from almost a different civilization. I also re designed our concept of "Fairy" from a totally magical people to the more 1950's idea of a very advanced people created by a "sorceress, who some say fell from the sky and others think she fell through the ages", and gave them a sense of reality and "peopleness"

Now there is a bit of humiliation in the LG world but it is not of the FemDom type, it is the kind that is implicit in nearly all supervisory adult/child relationships. In the late 1940's/early 1950's diapers were part of the little girl's world for a number of reasons. For one thing on a long trip, the little girl could not get out of the car in a wooded area and find a tree against which to take a leak. There were other things I eplained elsehwere. One big issue with us was the length of our skirts and dresses and how being in diapers affected this. That was a source of humiliation isn some ways if you were 8 or 9 and were put in a very above-the knee dress with a high waist, it smacked of still being in diapers or more to the point, of having people know or think you were. This issue of punishment was another matter, it was different for boys and girls and boys kpet saying that girls had it easy. And there was the unstated bugaboo for girls of becoming trollopy and how parents, especially mothers, dealt with that as well as the unmentioned menstrual cycle that would eventually come along. But these were deep dark secrets that Mama kept until you were almost or about 13 or 14 and usually came as a surprise. At 9, you just sensed from a kind of "vibe" that something nasty was around the corner from the behaviour of older sisters or other girls. And you have no idea what a period is like for a 15 year old girl in terms of pain and the knowledge that this will be your "friend" or "monthly visitor" or your "Aunt Mary". a little girls sensed but does not understand fully what is going on

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I apologize for the confusion, I was just referring to all sissies and little girls when I said sissies/little girls. I was not trying to link them nor did I say they were the same. The only reason I did that is because you shed light on that subject. While they are different perspectives, what I said about both I believe is true.

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