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Community Policies?


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As we continue to grow I'm thinking it's about time we begin to construct a set of rules and promises - both for [DD] to follow, and for members to follow.

Here is what I know should be included for the site's part:

  • DailyDiapers will not sell your personal information to anyone, anytime, ever.
  • We will respect your privacy and not reveal identifying information except where required by law.
  • We will not drastically change our free community style (You won't log-in tomorrow and find we've become a pay site.)
  • We do not create fake profiles to attract members. (some sites have thousands of phony female profiles to get people to join.)
  • All contests and giveaways will be genuine and fair. ( some sites have fake contests.)
  • We will take all reasonable steps to keep children and offensive material out of the site to provide you with a safe environment.
  • We will not subject you to offensive advertising (No hardcore porn ads.)

So, what else should I promise you. And as members of the community what do you think your responsibilities are?

  • Like 9
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That's very admirable. For one, we, the users, should probably do most of the follow:

    User Responsibility

  • I will be an active member

  • I will be polite in chat

  • I will post in the proper area

  • I will not post while intoxicated

  • I will not post offensive material

  • I will not post copyright material for which I do not own the copyright

  • I will refrain from personal attacks

  • I will know the difference between differing opinions and personal attacks

  • I will not do anything to embarrass the community or Daily Diapers

  • Like 7
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DailyDi and BoTox both have a good set of rules in which I know I would be content following. They appropriately protect all parties, and honestly, I don't think there's any more I could add, as all the important stuff was touched on.

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Guest Mummys Cute Little Lucy

Very nice DailyDi Thank You!

I'm very happy to agree BoTox!

(+1 for each!)

I say that at some point this should be released as a set of T&C or 'user agreement' or whatever.... and maybe that some date all users should agree to accept them or choose to leave, this is in my experience the right way to introduce such a change.

I'd just like to say that use of offensive language such as telling some one to **** Off is not polite!

The use of offensive language should not be restricted as such, after all we are an adult community and some times there is no other way to really say what you mean... but using it against someone else is just not ok!

  • Like 1
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I like them expect these..

•I will be an active member

you can't demand this of a member of the forums, you will also have to define what an active member is? is it posting? then it that case that means you've gotten rid of almost a 3rd of this community.

How active do you want us to be? I'm sorry but i've put this rule in several of my community's and lost members because of it, they felt they were forced to be on there which took the enjoyment out, also whos moderating the activity of each and every member? Your giving the admins a full time job just for doing that.

•I will refrain from personal attacks
I agree up to a certern point, I believe that what you conisder personal attacks may not be considered by the next person, how about changing it to respecting each other instead?

•I will know the difference between differing opinions and personal attacks
Not many people actully know the difference when its about them or somthing the've posted they'll see it as an attack on them. I myself have taken an opinion of a poster as an personal attack upon me.

I will not do anything to embarrass the community or Daily Diapers
This would be a bit hard to moderate wouldn't it? again I'd put somthing like 'i'll show respect for DD and the community.
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Saya, I agree that these would be hard to define carefully and then police. On the other hand, I don't think Daily Di or the mods are going to be bouncing anyone off the site for not posting enough.

I think the suggestions made are very good suggestions that we ought to work toward. I myself paused when I read 'will not post when intoxicated' since I've had a time or two when I came on the site after having quite a few. That isn't necessarily the point. Any guidelines can be nitpicked to death. While your intent is understandable, Saya, I'd relax a little. Let's try to go with the spirit of these statements and not worry about how the letter would be carried out. Daily Di and Botox have solid suggestions. Yvhuce had two additions, based largely I think on some recent posts. While they have validity, you could continue to add specific guidelines to answer specific behaviors.

One big problem with starting rules, bylaws, laws, etc is that once you start, you can get caught up in changes and additions based on infractions, slights, hurts or even major outrageous behaviors. Usually these behaviors are covered in the spirit of the original agreements but the individual then tries to weasel based on strict, technical interpretations. I don't think we need to get that way here. Let's just be safe, fair and reasonable.

The original posts (Di and Botox) are pretty good starts. There may be some additions or refinements that we could make, but face it - the site has survived this long without them - to come up with some reasonable statements isn't going to make things worse.

I like them expect these..

you can't demand this of a member of the forums, you will also have to define what an active member is? is it posting? then it that case that means you've gotten rid of almost a 3rd of this community.

How active do you want us to be? I'm sorry but i've put this rule in several of my community's and lost members because of it, they felt they were forced to be on there which took the enjoyment out, also whos moderating the activity of each and every member? Your giving the admins a full time job just for doing that.

I agree up to a certern point, I believe that what you conisder personal attacks may not be considered by the next person, how about changing it to respecting each other instead?

Not many people actully know the difference when its about them or somthing the've posted they'll see it as an attack on them. I myself have taken an opinion of a poster as an personal attack upon me.

This would be a bit hard to moderate wouldn't it? again I'd put somthing like 'i'll show respect for DD and the community.

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The use of offensive language should not be restricted as such, after all we are an adult community and some times there is no other way to really say what you mean...

I don't fully agree here. While cussing for emphasis is effective, it isn't the only way to say what you mean wink.gif and it can be toned down without loss of context. I've been told here to "get lost" and I wasn't offended- but when someone here told me to "F... off" using the entire word I was offended huh.gif Both mean the same thing but one is an expression of hate and should not be tolerated bash.gif Where to draw the line? I don't know but if it's plain that hatefulness was intended there is a problem.

About the "I will be an active member" part I disagree (though I'm pretty active)fish_h4h.gif A lot of people prefer to be quiet and there's nothing wrong with that.

Where Botox says: "I will know the difference between differing opinions and personal attacks. I will not do anything to embarrass the community or Daily Diapers"

I agree, yet there's some gray area in here sad.gif A certain irascible, contrary, and extremely negative long-time member here makes it a point to attack anyone with a differing view rather personally- even to the point of calling the other person stupid. It's not my place to kick this person out but I think it needs to happen. Since this is not the norm from most members I can put up with a little of this mellow.gif because this less-than-nice person is making themself the best possible argument against their way of thinking- anyone with an open mind can plainly see why you shouldn't think or be like this person at all tongue.gif I like the way Saya put it about simply respecting each other and I try to do that- I hope I'm doing that well. Saya also notes that some people can't discern between disagreement and personal attacks. That is an easy task- all you have to do is read carefully and see if they argue the concept or if they argue the person. Respectful debate is a good thing- personal attacks aren't. If you can't argue the concept alone you don't yet know enough about it to make a valid point. There's not really anything you can do about someone who willingly smears this site or us people except ban them from here. All you can do in know that most of the time people who whine about mistreatment brought it upon themselves, and in the rare cases where they didn't it's easy to figure out that someone else has a problem- then you simply avoid them and their problem!

About not posting while intoxicated- Well I'm against being intoxicated but that is a personal choice so do as you like. Just don't use your intoxication as an excuse for any misdeeds you do- drunk, sober or whatever you are responsible for everything you say or do period. Intoxication is no excuse because it doesn't change what has happened. If you can't be respectful when you're drunk then stay away from here till you sober up. If you know you can't control yourself while intoxicated then expect someone else to control you then- if you get banned fron here because of this you darn well deserved it and you'll get no sympathy from me ohmy.gif

We shouldn't need rules to live by but since there will always be people who don't want to consider that we're all in this world together without a choice in the matter then become a necessity. Overall DailyDiapers is as well-run a message board as I've ever found. Common sense, tolerance, and respect are the norm here and nobody gets chased off unless they do something that well deserves it. That's why I wub.gif this place!

Bettypooh

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User Responsibility

I will be an active member

Can't force people to come here. What about the binge/purge (or ebb/flow) cycle, eh?

I will be polite in chat

People's definitions of polite can differ. I get and agree with the general gist of it though.

I will post in the proper area

Agreed.

I will not post while intoxicated

LOL, can't stop people, dude.

I will not post offensive material

Offensive can differ from person to person. For example, "diaper sex" offends me. Should I demand that that not be posted about? No. I just don't read that stuff.

Continued next post because it wouldn't let me quote each point individually...

~ moogle

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I will not post copyright material for which I do not own the copyright

I semi-agree. I think copyrighted things can be used with permission/credit to the creator.

I will refrain from personal attacks

The definition of "personal attack" can differ.

I will know the difference between differing opinions and personal attacks

Okay, so how is the difference defined?

I will not do anything to embarrass the community or Daily Diapers

"I will not do anything to embarrass the community"...This is all kinds of vague. Going out in a diaper under clothing is too embarrassing for some members, but for others, not so much, for example. So how do we know "what not to do"? Personally I think this should just mean not going and lying to get a nurse to change you or anything illegal.

~ moogle

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How about just being a decent human being and enjoying the forum? Rules are really only needed when the solve more problems than they create.

I haven't seen any problems on the forum, but I haven't been here long enough or read enough posts to state it with certainty.

It seems like a pretty decent place so far.

-Brutal

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Answering the original question: "What do you think your responsibilities are..."

In the most realistic sense... I don't think that we have any other than contributing to the site.

-Brutal

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DD, i do agree especially as this site has become so large and is continuing to grow on a daily basis, that DD as an entity should have a community policy.

however i am vehemently apposed to any sort of 'user' agreement that stipulates what we can and cannot post, except when certain material is considered illegal by the host state/country of the website, in this case the USA.

While i have my own personal opinoins on what i WISH people would post, and what forums i wish they would post them in and how i wish everyone would just agree with everything i say, i have no right to claim that people should not be allowed to state their opinoins, even if that upsets another member.

While i do not think it is right, or nice, or kind for people to be mean and hurtful intentionally, i have no right to tell them what the can and cannot say.

I do not think a user agreement should stipulate behavior, except what is explicitly prohibited by the law. Any other user agreement would be allowing certain people's opinoins to dominate the bulletin boards.

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I'm not saying its ok, i'm nto saying i agree with it, or that i think it should happen, but i also don't believe in god, and could argue that anyone saying i should accept god is insulting and makes me feel bad, so should therefore everyone not be allowed to express their opinoins of god?

it sucks that people bash anyone for any lifestyle, and it should not happen anywhere in my opinoin, but this is an open community bulletin board. I feel that DD and the other admins/moderators do a good job of scanning the reply's and i know at times they do edit them, or will lock a thread. However my concern is who sets the rules.

It is DD's site, so therefore he has the right to accept or deny anything on the boards. But by banning everyone who says "i dont like homosexuals" or "i feel its a sin against god to be anything other than a heterosexual" is in itself a form of discrimination.

I dont like that people believe that way, but i'm sure lots of people dont agree with or like the things i believe in. We all should have the right to voice our opinoins. and yes at times i will be offended, at times i will find it unbelievable some of the posts made or viewpoints believed in, but i have no right to tell others what they can or cannot post on this board.

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I concur, but the basics of reality are this. This is a site we are all on for free. BUT, This is Daily Di's Site. Ultimately any rules can and will be at his choice. I'm just pointing out the obvious, but it's basically his dime running this place so, whatever he says goes. It's nice that he asks for advice, but nothing says he must follow it. I think he has done a wonderful thing with this site, and I for one will stand behind him with whatever he chooses to do. I applaud his efforts!!!

Oh yeah I've been drinking too!!! :P

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I don't fully agree here. While cussing for emphasis is effective, it isn't the only way to say what you mean wink.gif and it can be toned down without loss of context. I've been told here to "get lost" and I wasn't offended- but when someone here told me to "F... off" using the entire word I was offended huh.gif Both mean the same thing but one is an expression of hate and should not be tolerated bash.gif Where to draw the line? I don't know but if it's plain that hatefulness was intended there is a problem.

Bettypooh

what lucy means is that if for example you are saying goodbye to your friends in chat some one should not tell you to f**k off (with ck in there too) its just offencive, we are all grown ups and we can express ourselves that way to an extent but to just hurt someone is mean!!

i woild like to see us all get on, ok we have differnces but thats ok, everyone does!

but to say somthing with an intent to make them feel bad, thats just not nice!!

juniper

xxx

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Hey, nothing I wrote is gospel so don't read between the lines too much. Most of them can be considered variants of the golden rule. Personally, the things I wrote are things I try to do regardless of what is a rule. I consider them my code of ethics, my scruples. To me, it is just good etiquette and I'm going to do those things because it is what I think is right for me. Agree, disagree, your choice.

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People do realize being offended is a choice right?

An old friend opined that "Offense is taken, not given"- and that is true, yet it is not the whole truth huh.gif

Rarely is someone offended unintentionally except when the other person lacked courtesy, sensibility, maturity, or was just downright mean or stupid. If the person who felt hurt asks the offender to do better and they learn to do that, then all is OK- that's generally how we all learn that certain words are offensive wink.gif But if the offender doesn't learn, doesn't care, or doesn't change then the problem is them, not the offended so they need to be taken to the next level of learning- pain and loss bash.gif If the offended 'blows up in response they too have something to learn ohmy.gif

Something that many just don't seem to get is that all websites, whether open to the public or not, are private property and you have no right or expectation to anything when you're there. That includes any right or expectation to free speech. You're not in your home or in public so someone elses rules now apply- and if you don't like them then leave and if they don't think you're following their rules they can kick you out- it is their property and they can do as they please cool.gif

I've been around awhile and I've been offeneded- accidentally and intentionally. Without some other clues(such as a smirk or the addition of a single-finger hand gesture)it can sometimes be hard to determine if it was intentional. But other times it is not necessary to actually 'see' the other person- it is plain by the rest of what they write or by their general attitude that they offend people intentionally. Unless something is done to cause them to stop they will continue doing it. This is not a socially acceptable behavior in most places(and it's why I wouldn't live in NYC where it's not only accepted- it's expected!).

Just to play devil's advocate I wonder if you are a 'little person' Curiosity? Have you considered that your avatar might be offensive to them if you are of normal stature? I don't like it myself, but if it's not bothering anyone else then there is no problem with it. And it would surprise the heck out of me if you intended to offend with it because you don't seem to be someone who would do that. My guess would be that you like it because it's kind of funny. I just wanted to exemplify how tough it can be to define 'offensive' and why it's better to keep a bit of distance away from wherever that somewhat vague line may be drawn biggrin.gif

Bettypooh

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Good job Daily Di, start a hot topic and then butt out. :D Way to stir the hornets nest. :D:D:D

^^^^Just kidding btw. :) But I found this post slightly amusing. Me, I like the site the way it is. I could do with a few less idiots, but you'll never get rid of them all. I just got my points threshold set a bit high to avoid the assess out there. With a community this large and diverse, there is no way everyone will get along all the time. All we can do is take what we want out of it.

Although, sometimes, it just feels better to call someone that f*****g idiot. :D

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