Becoming Incontinent, Just Do It.

[diaperedarmyman]

LOL funny way of saying that but ok

[Creepymouse]

@Pickle

I can understand where you're coming from on the philosophy front, but for some people, making a plan and a commitment for a future date is KEY to the process. There's a moderately successful program called something like "Stop Smoking...Later!" The idea being that every time you light up, you tell yourself, "Only 15 days before my last cigarette" or "Next week, I'll be smoke free" et cetera. By the time your date comes around, you've already given yourself a lot of positive feedback, and some people may actually dislike the last few.

Anyway, what I'm saying is that for some people, setting a goal for next month, then gradually telling oneself things like "10 days left before I'm diaper dependant" or "Won't it be nice next week when I don't have to use the potty?" and finally "This is the last time I have to use the potty!" Maybe even have a little celebration, doing as the program mentions and destroying all the adult underwear, donating clothes that won't fit over diapers, etc. It's a way to psych oneself out, I think. I liked it, while your suggestions are good, I wouldn't get as much from them.

There ARE a few of his suggestions that are simply coming from a frugality perspective. Cheap diapers, t-shirts sewn into onesies, not everyone needs that. But my suggestion would be for anyone embarking on a similar program, to set rules and goals, then stick to them. People find that habits (such as diaper dependence) are easier to form if they have a structure to encourage the learning process. Just saying "I think I'll wear a diaper today" every day, there's no commitment. OTOH, if you simply want to enjoy them and not become diaper dependent, that's a good choice too, just not for everyone.

[Bea]

I am in the situation that I like wearing diapers and I am part time incontinent. For need I do not have to wear diapers 24/7. But I like to wear and wet diapers so much I decided some weeks ago to wear and wet diapers 24/7. As far as I can say now is that it is a great experience. I still love it. I still love to wear diapers. Especially when it is soaked and a little bit cold. I know that a lot of people think that this is crazy but what should I do if I really like it?

I think I am not able to stop this because of my desire.

[Creepymouse]

The way I see it, Bea, you accepted the fact that you have bladder problems, but you're happy to wear diapers to protect your clothes and dignity. You're willing and happy to deal with the occasional accident or leak or unscheduled diaper change, or rash. You don't view it as a burden, which is the difference between someone who is happy wearing diapers, and someone who would rather have a choice.

[Dill_Pickle]

@creepymouse

Let us agree to disagree on philosophy....not that I want to discourage Armyman from wearing diapers. However, elsewhere, he has mentioned he's got one more tour of duty...where he probably still needs to be diaper-optional.

Armyman, give yourself a present: Spend a week in diapers. All week (or month). My claim is that you don't need the commitment to permanence, that's not what it's about...it's about allowing yourself the pleasure. And if Armyman's padding isn't wet, that's not a problem, he will stil have enjoyed himself.

One more thing, and on this point I think Creepymouse will join me: DO NOT FEEL GUILTY ABOUT WEARING DIAPERS. Wet or dry.

[Creepymouse]

Yup, agreed on that point.

I got the feeling that the author of the 12 month program started from having barely worn diapers at all, considering he was still struggling to wet, at first. I don't think I've struggled to wet, other than when extremely uncomfortable, for years.

[KrisNdiapers]

It is too bad that we are so dispersed geographically that we cant find roomates with common interest for bladder retraining support. I think sharing a house with someone on the same mission, dealling with the same public anxiety, the same smells and mess, and having a common place to retreat to. All this may help. I personally dont want to change a roomates diapers, but at least have someone to return possitive support.

[Dill_Pickle]

I am in the situation that I like wearing diapers and I am part time incontinent. For need I do not have to wear diapers 24/7. But I like to wear and wet diapers so much I decided some weeks ago to wear and wet diapers 24/7. As far as I can say now is that it is a great experience. I still love it. I still love to wear diapers. Especially when it is soaked and a little bit cold. I know that a lot of people think that this is crazy but what should I do if I really like it?

I think I am not able to stop this because of my desire.

Bea, if you really like it, wear diapers! (and don't be too concerned if you use the toilet when you feel like it. That will let you feel secure but remain part-time.) The twelve-month program isn't for everyone; I'm not full time diapered myself, and don 't want to be. Too many situations where diapers optional is an advantage.

I think that creepymouse and I disagree because some people do need that structure, others don't. Take care of YOU.

[Guest Craig]

And now a comment that's totally off the wall.....

All these excellent posts here are causing me to think about re-starting the 12 Month Program which I stopped about a year ago after 2 to 3 months when I was starting to get results and freaked out. Let's see, I'm already diapered every night so I'm used to involuntary diaper changes, I already like to wear when out during the day and evening, I won't use a public restroom, ummmmm.....

See what you started???

[Andromeda]

Waw, what a lot of interesting posts. All these advises sure are great.

And also the warning from the ones that really are incontinent should be listened too.

I however believe that it's all in the mind. When I put on a diaper, I become so relaxed that I will wet and mess whit out even thinking about it . Sure if I would concentrate 200% I could be continent in a diaper, but why would I, or would you ?

When I am at work, I don't wear diapers and have no problems whatsoever staying dry. It was adjusting in the beginning, but I am convinced that your body will know when it can let go and when it can not just by the feeling of a diaper.

Now out of experience I would say stay dry 50% of the time at least, or you will get true incontinence. It is one thing fantasizing about it, but the day you wet yourself in public without control can be very scary.

There have been enough warnings here, so I would like people to know it is possible, you can be part-time incontinent.

There have been discussions about creating a Pavlov reaction to wet yourself, and I guess that is how I conditioned myself to use the feeling of a diaper as a trigger.

If I could do it, so can you.

[Marcuss]

It has all been said before but i feel there is a difference to using 24/7 and total incontinence more than just the option. There is a surrender and submission to your self when you are really incontinent by choice or just act that way by choice. Its like dressing and acting like a women when you were born a man or getting a sex change. Other than the image of yourself naked pre and post op there is no difference (not a perfect analogy but bear with me). It is the permanence and social/emotional distinction to having your body parts the way you want them that is important not just the life style. If it was no more than a lifestyle decision there would be no such thing as transsexuals just "legal cross-dressers" because the surgery would be unnecessary and to "drastic/ill-thought".

I dont want anyone to do anything to harm their self or cause permanent changes with out thinking long and hard about all aspects of those decisions and then thinking again...and again. And if it is still what they want more power too them. In all honesty with out self mutilation there is really no way a person can make them self incontinent over night and by the time these things become even partially permanent those uncomfortable situations will arise. Maby they will be well on their way before the first time they have a sudden urgent sensation for explosive bowels wile standing in line at best buy 3 days before Christmas (true story and no i did not make it...or a purchase) they can still hold it long enough... and maby not. Either way there will be times before irreversible success that with be the most inconvenient and poorly timed episodes...several episodes; church, child's birthday parties, extended work meetings on short notice etc. Either way when they go home they will have a hard time NOT thinking about their choices and if it is really what they want and still be to the point they can with some work ... go back. Most posts i read on this site are from smart kind well thought people with opinions i agree and dis-agree with. But for some reason the "tone" is be them pro or against that it is a switch that happens over night or in a couple weeks. The guy that wrote the 12 month plan was not totally obviously incontinent at the end and honestly i think to some extent over stated his success... He still could go back and probably in half the time it took him to get that way less perhaps bed wetting. My guess is that even after 3+ years a person would not be obviously incontinent. Possibly one or several times a day they did not realize they started but not all the time every time. A persons retraining will most likely plateau and remain at that level for a long time before no possible way to go back to socially functional admittedly with some side effects possibly for a long time. The only way you could be irreversibly trained to be incontinent is if you managed to learn to ignore not just the urge to need to go and the urge to start/stop but the perception that it has even happened. It is not possible to willingly atrophy your sphincters or consciously sever nerves with just the power of your mind and with out those things happening it will never truly be permanent. People have woken from coma after 5+ years and regained total continence and their muscles did atrophy. It will just get very hard to recontinise yourself.

Look at the causes of medical incontinence. We can and do talk to people with almost every medical cause for incontinence on this site. There are only 2 root causes, Nerve damage and muscle damage. Damage in lots of different ways but fundamentally in one way or another damage. Even lesser forms of incontinence such as over active bladder and enlarged prostate not to make lite of those issues are forms of damage to the system that can not be caused by willpower alone. The most a person with all things working as intended can hope to achieve is week retention muscles due to lack of use and the willingness to allow them to get weaker and after time the willingness to ignore nerve messages alerting you to your body. No damage. And with out damage i just cant accept it as permanent. There will be people responding to this post saying "no i did it i cant go back". Even some that say they want to go back and cant. I say they cant easily go back and perhaps cant do it alone with out physical therapy...it wont be easy to loose that much control and there will be a point where it will be even harder to get back than it was to loose but possible.

[Blackonyx]

Wearing diapers 24/7 has always been a challenge for me because, Ill start wearing diapers but Ill have go to work. I work in private security so I have to wear a uniform. I don't want wear a diaper, have a really bad accident and find that out that I have wet my uniform. Or worst getting caught by the boss and having to explain my predicament!

I agree with everything that has been said so far about just wearing 24/7 and let nature take its course. Its just difficult to be in diapers 24/7 and when you find yourself in situations where diapers can be problematic. The basic idea of wearing diapers 24/7 is that you ARE in diapers 24/7 regardless of what I wear to work.

Anyone have any advice or suggestions? thanks!

[dlsmd]

I agree with everything that has been said so far about just wearing 24/7 and let nature take its course. Its just difficult to be in diapers 24/7 and when you find yourself in situations where diapers can be problematic. The basic idea of wearing diapers 24/7 is that you ARE in diapers 24/7 regardless of what I wear to work.

Anyone have any advice or suggestions? thanks!

being incon i would not wihs this on my worst enemy (just so you know ware i come from)

but

to protect from leeks just get your self a pare of rubber/plastic pants

[ldatsea]

personally i would not wish this on my worst enemy ..... but using the best quality diapers and if needed use plastic pants there are no issues wearing diapers at work. been doing that a very long time, i would suggest to change often no more than 6hrs as that is about the time wet diapers begin to smell....

[Creepymouse]

to protect from leeks

Oh no! Leeks!

[dlsmd]

Oh no! Leeks!

you know what i meen

sorry i suck at spelling

[silver76]

As someone who is incontinent and requires to wear diapers on a 24/7 basis,i realy cant compehend how anyone would want to be this way,for it truly is not a fun thing having to change many times a day and when you have to go for any sort of medical everyone sees that you are in a diaper.

Not having any sort of control over you your own bladder,and wetting yourself all the time nappy rash haveing to change and the danger of wetting when you are not in a nappy,and your clean one is so close but you just cant control when you will pee is no fun.

I was just about to write exactly the same as you have written,then I saw your post.I started out as a DL from my teens but had no idea that 20 years later I would have to come to depend on such products.It started with digestive problems,which became pancreatitis coupled with bowel dysfunction and permanent diarrhea,terrible bowel cramps,leaks,frequency etc.As the dosage of pain meds increased the diarrhea calmed down but I still suffer from terrible cramps,leaks etc.To top all of this off the dysfuction of my bowel started to affect my bladder,over time this led to an overactive bladder with extreme urgency,frequency,loss of control etc.During tests it was found that my testicles were no longer producing testosterone requiring me to have injections every three months of testosterone.I developed urethral strictures that I have had surgery performed on with little to no success which means I also now have to use a catheter to dilate the strictures regularly.At times I use a foley catheter,one to dialte the stricture and two,for some relief from my overactive bladder,strangely after 24hrs with a catheter if it's removed things are calm for a day but then comes back with a vengence.All through these problems I have suffered from infections of the testicles,one side at a time where they swell to the size of a grapefruit along with constant prostatitis.

So from my point of view and experience in the past I can see why people like to wear diapers and wet,but believe me the last thing you want is to become incontinent.I really think that these people cannot truly comprehend what real incontinence is like.The constant changing,washing,using creams to prevent soreness,the fear of going out in public and either being spotted wearing a diaper or having to change when out.You plan every trip by how far the nearest toilet is,being in places where you haven't been before and not knowing where the nearest toilet is,needless to say every trip has to be planned with almost military precision,every where you go you must remeber to take all your supplies with you.

I could go on for ever,but you get the idea.It might seem like fun and a good idea,but believe me when I say that it is far from either.Stick to wearing at home in the evenings and weekend,enjoy whatever "Activities" you get up to in them,but for gods sake don't do anything that could cause irreperable damage unless you want to be house bound and tied to the nearest toilet for the rest of your life.

[Creepymouse]

The constant changing,washing,using creams to prevent soreness,the fear of going out in public and either being spotted wearing a diaper or having to change when out.You plan every trip by how far the nearest toilet is,being in places where you haven't been before and not knowing where the nearest toilet is,needless to say every trip has to be planned with almost military precision,every where you go you must remeber to take all your supplies with you.

I suppose this is the difference between wanting something and having something forced on you. (As an aside example, a lady I know was very upset to hear that my wife wanted breast implants. The woman had breast cancer and while the implant she got gave her a semblance of normality, she still felt like her breast had been taken from her. On the other hand, wife wanted implants, and was willing to accept any side effects that went with them.) While you can understand that diapers are reasonably comfortable and convenient, your perspective will always be one of a person who has had continence stripped from him against his will.

As one of those who likes diapers and is fascinated by the possibility of having my choice taken away, I've spent months straight in diapers, using them and dealing with the same consequences as though I were incontinent. Changing was twice or three times a day, and it was quite a bit more enjoyable than a normal trip to the bathroom. Washing was normal in the shower, since I didn't have messy diapers more than once a day if that, so nothing out of the ordinary. No cream was needed, though powder on the inner thighs helped with chafing. I never had any fear of going out in public, heck I went to work every day, and often changed at work or while out shopping or such. I had no more trouble worrying about a toilet than any continent person, perhaps less, and never required any semblance of military precision. I ONCE forgot a diaper because I didn't expect to have to walk home and find that I was locked out because my wife went on a spontaneous trip somewhere without telling me, and though it was a cold, wet wait, it wasn't torturous by any stretch. Two disposables in the valet box in the van and a couple in my backpack + some powder and wipes, no worries.

On the other hand, since I am one of those who wants this, I can't fully understand the mindset of someone like you, who has lost the option to choose. I can see how things like that would be frustrating for you, but I can't truly know how bad it is, because the same things that bother you about it are what I expect and enjoy about it.

I've read of people complaining about changing their sheets twice in one night, about having to change clothes and do tons of extra laundry, and to me that is simply an example that they aren't managing their condition properly. I honestly haven't been actively pursuing incontinence for the last several years, from a combination of financial issues and lack of interest. But if it were to come upon me suddenly, I would know what I was getting in to and how to handle it. And I wouldn't mind at all. It wouldn't change my life, only my underwear.

[allen476]

As one of those who likes diapers and is fascinated by the possibility of having my choice taken away, I've spent months straight in diapers, using them and dealing with the same consequences as though I were incontinent. Changing was twice or three times a day, and it was quite a bit more enjoyable than a normal trip to the bathroom. Washing was normal in the shower, since I didn't have messy diapers more than once a day if that, so nothing out of the ordinary. No cream was needed, though powder on the inner thighs helped with chafing. I never had any fear of going out in public, heck I went to work every day, and often changed at work or while out shopping or such. I had no more trouble worrying about a toilet than any continent person, perhaps less, and never required any semblance of military precision. I ONCE forgot a diaper because I didn't expect to have to walk home and find that I was locked out because my wife went on a spontaneous trip somewhere without telling me, and though it was a cold, wet wait, it wasn't torturous by any stretch. Two disposables in the valet box in the van and a couple in my backpack + some powder and wipes, no worries.

On the other hand, since I am one of those who wants this, I can't fully understand the mindset of someone like you, who has lost the option to choose. I can see how things like that would be frustrating for you, but I can't truly know how bad it is, because the same things that bother you about it are what I expect and enjoy about it.

You can say what you want but you are not grasping the physical difference between a person that is incontinent and a person that chooses to lose control.

A truly incontinent person has no sensation of when they are going. I can tell you that after a while you no longer feel it. This is where the fear in a truly incontinent comes from. Since they can longer tell, they no longer can predict how long a diaper will last. A person trying to achieve incontinence has to concentrate on the sensation to know that they have gone and thus knows about when the diaper is getting full and time to change.

There has been many times that I have changed just before I leave for a quick trip to the store to pick "a few things" that I find that I need to change once I get there. Usually those changes are due to feces rather than urine. You say that you only had one messy diaper a day, I can tell you that a truly incontinent person can have several messy diapers a day.

I've read of people complaining about changing their sheets twice in one night, about having to change clothes and do tons of extra laundry, and to me that is simply an example that they aren't managing their condition properly. I honestly haven't been actively pursuing incontinence for the last several years, from a combination of financial issues and lack of interest. But if it were to come upon me suddenly, I would know what I was getting in to and how to handle it. And I wouldn't mind at all. It wouldn't change my life, only my underwear.

See that is like a person that can see telling a blind person that they need a better pair of glasses and they will be fine.

You can manage the condition all you want. I manage with diet, timing, and better products. However I still have accidents, I still have leaks, and I still have extra laundry to do. It's a fact of life when you have incontinence. There is no perfect diaper out there. If you are laying on your side, urine will follow gravity and since there are no "diapers for side sleepers" out there, leaks are going to happen.

Do I have tons of extra laundry to do? No.....but I have been managing this for a long time and my extra laundry now is basically clothes that have gotten wet from a leaker. Someone that has just started to deal with this though hasn't had the time to adapt and thus has a lot more accidents and mis-steps.

I gues what it comes down to, does it take planning when you want to go out if you are incontinent? Yes.... With military type planning? No......but it does take a few minutes to figure out what you need to take with you for what you are doing.

[darkravendl]

allen476, not all types of incontinence are sensationless. I have urge incontinence and only suffer from urinary ic. I can tell when I'm going I just can't stop the flow. I don't get that sensation of a full bladder like a normal person does.

[Baby Brian]

Same thing for me too. I'm urge incontinent and can tell when I'm going, just not when I will be going, nor can I stop it. The urges are a real down side, but I also enjoy wearing a diaper 24/7 immensely.

[Creepymouse]

Incontinence, really, only means the inability to control something. It was quite odd when I first read The Time Machine and Wells used the word 'incontinently' to describe the flailing motions of a character. Now most people shorten 'urinary incontinence' to just incontinence. But even so, in essence it still means simply the inability to control the time and place of voiding, whether you can feel it or not. I would imagine that the vast majority of people with a clinical diagnosis of urinary incontinence retain sensation. Urge incontinence and stress incontinence are the prevalent forms of urinary incontinence AFAIK, and both of those are only intermittent, in that the sufferer retains partial control some of the time.

As a matter of fact, there are a good proportion of people who suffer from urinary incontinence who get sudden and painful urges even when their bladders are empty or nearly so. Some end up searching for a method of reaching full 'infantile' incontinence like we read about in AB stories, as a way to eliminate those painful urges.

there are no "diapers for side sleepers" out there, leaks are going to happen.

Yes there are; cloth diapers are quite adequate for any sleeping position, or have been in my experience. Of course, some people hate them, and are left with the issue of inadequate disposable choices but it IS a choice. Leaks DO happen, but except in the event that a person has no sensation below the waist at all, they should be rare with a good quality diaper. I am painfully aware of a soggy bottom long before I have any issues with leaking, except when I have had a problem with defective manufacturing. As I said before, I think a lot of it comes back to the difference between 'surrendering' one's choice, and having it taken away, and neither can truly understand the other side.

[Bettypooh]

Words mean things, and the word "Incontinence" is a word of description meaning an inability to contain. It's cause has no bearing on it's meaning as it only describes the effect. Some have incontinence against their will, and some have trained themselves to have that effect. Both are truly incontinent, as both cannot contain Generally the word is presumed to infer unwanted Incontinence, but intelligent people don't make presumptions unnecessarily

That the causes differ does matter in some areas, which is why we have our "Incontinence Forum" which is aimed at those who are incontinent but do not wish to be, and our "Incontinent- Desires" forum here for those who wish to or have achieved willful Incontinence

For the newer members I would like to point out that the "Incontinence" forum is more tightly Moderated as to content and should not be used for posting desired Incontinence topics or opinions, which belong here.

The bottom line is that if you cannot retain the contents of your bladder or colon as most people normally do, you are Incontinent to at least some degree and you can rightfully lay claim to that description. If you prefer you can certainly describe it's cause or the specific type of it you're speaking of That choice, and any consequences arising from it, is yours to deal with and yours alone.

Bettypooh

[Diaperboy1437]

On 7/16/2010 at 1:18 PM, Guest dldave89 said:

JUST TODAY I STARTED MY INCONTINENT JOURNEY. I WORE DIAPER SINCE LAST NITE AND DIDNT WET BUT WENT TO WALMART AND WHILE WAITING I HAD TO GO AND JUST WENT I WAS VERY HAPPY BUT I THINK I NEED A BETER BRAND AS SOON AS I GOT IN MY CAR MY DIAPER LEAKED THRU SEAT AND CLOTHES WERE SOAKED AND MY WIFE FELT BAD NE ONE GOT A GOOD BRAND THEY RECOMEND FOR DAY AND NIGHT TIME?

I went to CVS and bought some briefs. They’re not as good as the F4 Abena but they certainly did well. I didn’t get to use them much 

[TGalactic2012]

On 4/20/2009 at 7:18 PM, Andromeda said:

As mentioned in many topics here, becoming incontinent is just a matter of wearing a diaper and letting go . I have been doing this for awhile now and by relaxing and just letting it flow every time i was in diapers, i achieved after about a month a mindset were my body would just let go without even thinking about it. For this relaxed mindset however I had to be in diapers. Today however happened the next step, i was watching tv and relaxing when i started to pee without being in diapers, I had to really force myself mentally to stop not to mess up the couch completely. So i can assure u the letting go method really works, so be carefull what u wish for.

¿Quiénes se hicieron incontinentes?