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  1. Hello All, Well, I'm going to try and tell you all about me; I'm hopes of making some new friends and being a positive part of this community! I'm very excited to be here, and am hoping to have a positive experience while contributing to an awesome community of folks. I have been an AB throughout my entire life and, in fact, my earliest memories are AB related. Not sure how this became my personality (Damn you, "Tom and Jerry!"), but it is, and so at this stage in my life I would just like to embrace it, and hopefully meet some cool people to call friends. I am a teacher, and have been for a few years now. I think that most people would be SHOCKED to learn that I am an AB, just because they are so used to interacting with me in my everyday self - which is a combination of two characters I carefully crafted over many years: the Alpha Male and the Charismatic Performer. This has helped me survive in the world, and is something I did out of necessity after several disastrous occurrences directly related to "being myself" with friends and girlfriends starting in High School. At this point, I just want to meet some awesome people that are aware of who I actually am, and love and embrace me. Discovering this community, I'm hoping, is a first step towards that goal. I also love to jam out on great music, play video games (Xbox Series X), and work on projects like woodworking. I have two dogs whom I love with my whole heart, and I think I've got a pretty decent sense of humor. I know... tl;Dr. However if you did read, please feel free to message me, as I would love to make new friends! Also, I know this isn't the place for this - but I'm single and in North Texas, so if you read this and would like to talk (in that way), I would be very interested in hearing from you, as well! Thanks for reading! I look forward to meeting you all! Sincerely, JPB
  2. Hi everyone, my name is Alice. I've been a part of the ABDL community for a while now and looking to make friends. I'm a trans-woman pronouns she/her, I like video games, anime, and lover of gothic fashion. Hope to make some good friends.
  3. I’m looking for an rp partner willing to play as both a little and big interchangeably with me! In other words: A switch. We would swap roles for each story we do. I could even be the dom/big first as long as we agree to play another one afterwards that involves me as the sub/little. As for plots, I’m thinking anything involving wetting, messing, hypnosis, fantasy elements, and/or forced regression. But above all I like to focus on humiliation! I am open to hearing out your ideas! So if any babies/switches/caregivers are interested please dm me or reply to this message!
  4. Hi everyone, So I've been a lurker for years. Reading your stories, a little jealous sometimes at certain scenarios. I love writing but never had the courage to write ABDL stories. Today I just felt like trying and made my own account to publish. English is not my native language, constructive criticism and ideas are always welcome. If you guys like it, I will definitely continue. Nina ":) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Intro The sun was finding it's way through the half open blinds, small beams of light peaking through on the early Monday morning. The first sign of hopefully good weather today, not that they wouldn't go out if there was chance of rain but for an outside activity it surely was a plus. The bedroom was quiet, except for the soft snoring of a young man. Next to his sleeping form was a woman, just a few years his senior. She had been awake for several minutes already but hadn't moved yet, she was content with just looking at her sweet for now. He had cradled himself against her, the head full of dark brown curls nestled against the woman's bosom and his hand holding onto the fabric of the pink nighty she was wearing. The other one held a grip onto a stuffed red panda, his favourite animal. His light snores wear still heard, but the pacifier in his mouth continued to move up and down every now and then as he suckled. He also was content. This new dynamic had been going on for seven weeks now, they had been together for two and a half. But they had both missed something in it, well, Jessy mostly. A mother. Esmee had always cared for him, right from the start she nurtured him a little more then a girlfriend probably should have. But that's what he needed, someone to tell him what do, make his decisions. It gave him structure, less stress and she was more then happy to see him blossom in life because of that. She was his partner but also his mama now. In the last seven weeks there had been changes, obviously all in agreement. Some he was unsure about, like the bedroom across the hall being turned into his nursery. He liked the big bed, loved snuggling with his Mama as he slept. But there he was all alone with just his panda, so for now they agreed only naps were to be taken in his crib. Diapers on the other hand hadn't been much of a problem. He was naturally a little lazy, so the diapers were introduced as the perfect solution for gaming, no potty breaks needed. Jessy liked his diapers, the infantile underwear felt nice and thick. And his Mama always gave him bum pats when they snuggled, those were the best. With every drop of motherly love Esmee gave Jessy the last seven weeks, he became a different person. He slept better, was less anxious and just in general much happier being her little boy. There was only one thing that he struggled with most, outside. Jessy had no trouble being his Mama's boy inside, but out of the house? What if friends saw him, family? Or if a stranger noticed the bulge of the thick pampers? The thought on it's own made him physically ill. What if they noticed? Esmee understood, but this dynamic they had, she liked it too. More then she was willing to admit and she wasn't just going to 'play house' at the house. So every now and then she would take him with her on errands, just small ones. Dressed in shorts a size too big, a clear white onesie underneath that was snapped closed at the crotch, the tight fabric against his thick diapers and a striped red and white t-shirt to hide it under. They would wander through the grocery store, one that was two towns away from theirs. She would hold his hand, like any mother that wouldn't want their child to wonder off. Jessy would toddle next to her, his legs splayed apart because of the underwear. And he was quiet, with a faint little blush on his cheeks as Esmee walked through the store with him, occasionally patting his crinkling behind, reminding Jessy of his status. And with every small outing the young man had with his Mama, he felt more relaxed. It was only a small routine trip after all, she was there, making sure he was alright and taken care of. On the last trip he even emptied his bladder, right there in the baby isle as Mama was getting new wipes. But today would be different, today they were going to the zoo. Jessy was excited to see the red pandas, but the realisation that it was a full day out made him anxious. And when he was anxious, he became a fussy little boy. He didn't listen or cleaned up his toys. To top it all off, Mama made him lunch and he purposely tossed it on the floor. Yesterday evening they were supposed to go out for dinner with friends, the first time in a full week he would be out of diapers and in a pull up. Mama made him wear those just to be sure. But she had canceled it because of his behaviour, told them they couldn't make it. And when Mama announced that, Jessy threw his PlayStation controller on the ground in anger. As it collided against the black tiles, the back came off and the controller glided away to the other side of the living room. Seeing the state of the item he immediately regretted it, more reason because it been a gift. Mama had pulled some serious strings to get it for him when it came out, it was hard to get but she managed and here he was throwing it around. Esmee wasn't going to punish him for his behaviour, she knew what the real source of the behaviour was. Not to mention that the guilt was already written over his face before the controller had come against the ground. His cheeks were now red, glistering of tears in his eyes as he looked up slowly, even Jessy was embarrassed at his own childish tantrum. So she took his hand, deciding that an early bedtime and some extra motherly love was in order. Now here they were the next morning, Jessy cradled against his loving Mama as he dreamed of red pandas with diapers on.
  5. Im looking for a baby girl around my age who needs a mommy. 18-27 preferred. Must have a skype acc.
  6. Was browsing ebay and came across a listing for Luvs Size 7. Did these just come out? I tried looking them up on google and only see size 6's.
  7. Hello Iam 36 year "old" from Norway. Been intrested inn diapers etch as long as I can remember. Iam here to meet likeminded people Have a good dry day
  8. Hey I’m Alex! Nice to meet you all. I go by she her pronouns or they them is fine too. I am bisexual, or maybe pansexual, still figuring it out. I am 22 but my ABDL age is around 10 years old. Or maybe 5. I have always been super into ABDL since a long time ago, I always sort of had the perspective of treasuring my childhood. I still enjoy the things I loved as a kid, and I probably will until I’m an old grandma hahahaha. as a kid, I really loved Arthur! I also loved Kipper the dog (I think it was a British cartoon, though, it’s super cute though i recommend looking it up!), the magic school bus, and I loved cartoons in general. Now as an adult I still watch Adventure time, spongebob, gravity falls, I even started watching Hey Arnold because it looked so funny and relatable since I was born in the city, and it’s about city kids. I actually never watched it as a kid, but I figured out about it a few years back and love it!!! Also, anime, I watched Sailor Moon and Pokemon mostly when I was a kid. I also was a gameboy era kid, so I played Pokemon Emerald when I was a kid and it is still my favorite game!! Actually I’m currently playing it again for nostalgia purposes. And because it’s just genuinely fun. I also love Animal Crossing! My fav anime is actually Soul Eater, i know, it’s kinda silly but it’s mainly because I LOVE Death the Kid. (He is my fictional character crush and my comfort character....ahahaaaaa...)? okay that’s all! About diapers, I am still practicing putting diapers on, and I’m not exactly wearing them in public yet, and I don’t know if I ever will, but it’s definitely something I have considered and am willing to try. Just gotta be a little more confident in my ABDL side first! ☺️ it’s really great to meet you all! Feel free to tell me your favorite cartoons, too! Oh! Last tidbit of information! I do actually go to art school , art college whatever you call it! In New York City. I go to a school called SVA (school of visual arts), if you don’t know it, feel free to look at their website. It’s known to be a super competitive school, but in my experience, it’s really fine, and I actually really love it there. The people there are all really great artists and creative people, and I feel mostly comfortable there, too. They do actually have a Disability Services, which is really useful to me because I do actually have Autism, ADHD and anxiety (social anxiety as well, which I am working on!) I think it’s really cool that they have services for Autistic people, and a lot of people don’t actually know this. But yea! SVA is pretty lit. I don’t know if any of my friends from school are into ABDL, though...but you never know! If anything, I hope the people I currently consider my friends will be supportive. ? I hope to show you all my drawings in another thread! Thanks for reading! ☺️? a photo of me in my pajamas:
  9. So here it goes again! The absolute love of my life has had this fetish since he himself was in diapers. I'm completely new to the scene and I need help with tips, advice, anything helps! We as a couple have just opened discussion into exploring this together. He's bought his preferred type and we've been through 3 nights of him being super comfy! I'm happy for him, now that he's comfortable with himself he's so much happier. But my dumb ass normie brain keeps getting her feeling hurt! How can I try learning about the desire for this when the community is so obscure!? I need a guru. I need links. I need friends who are going through this or wish to help me understand how my love feels and how to better make him comfortable. Also ya girl is a XXL and needs a site for cute sizable diapers to try this thing out!! Wish me luck, even if I get no responses airing this has kinda been therapeutic in a sense. Anyways, peace and love. Thank you for the time.
  10. So I just got into cloth diapers. For years I've used disposable ones, and they suck lol. I got them from a local supplier and it is a godsend. It holds so much! But on to the main point. I have some questions: 1 how often do I change? (I had 3 full accidents before I changed) 2 is there any you all recommend? 3 Is it ok to wash them daily?(I bought 4 pairs plus vinal pants for them) I had the first pairs on for 6hrs each. Please don't make fun of me I'm new to this
  11. Hey! New to this, wearing my first adult nappy today and decided to see whats out there. Wanting to be able to connect with others, find friends and a DD/MD/CG. Also want to be able to talk to people about this so I can learn more and experience whats been in my head for years
  12. Ohpoorbaby

    Hi

    Hi im ohpoorbaby I am an ab i have urinary incontinence and have ibs d
  13. Hello all my name is zack. I’m 31, an army veteran. I love video games and being outside. I work an amazing job at a nature park. Not sure what else to put so feel free to message me a hello
  14. So here it goes. The absolute love of my life has had this fetish since he himself was in diapers. I'm completely new to the scene and I need help with tips, advice, anything helps! We as a couple have just opened discussion into exploring this together. He's bought his preferred type and we've been through 3 nights of him being super comfy! I'm happy for him, now that he's comfortable with himself he's so much happier. But my dumb ass normie brain keeps getting her feeling hurt! How can I try learning about the desire for this when the community is so obscure!? I need a guru. I need links. I need friends who are going through this or wish to help me understand how my love feels and how to better make him comfortable. Also ya girl is a XXL and needs a site for cute sizable diapers to try this thing out!! Wish me luck, even if I get no responses airing this has kinda been therapeutic in a sense. Anyways, peace and love. Thank you for the time.
  15. Hi my names Brandon I’ve just found this board and am excited to be a part of it.
  16. Heya I’m 19 male. I’ve been a lover of diapers for a few years now though I still haven’t gotten to venture much. Hoping to meet others in my area where I can be myself and a feel little. If you’re interested please let me know! ❤️
  17. So my daddy don't know yet.. I'm new to this (couple of weeks). I've been in big girl panties all weekend, and finally this morning he went to work and I got a chance to put a diaper on. Been laying here in bliss in my now wet princess diapee with my paci. Daddy is my hubby .. any suggestions how to break it to him?
  18. Hey Everyone! I am trying to become a great writer like so many people on this site, but I am finding out that most people read my work and my biggest problem is I post massive chunks of words together without spacing. Is there a rule of thumb for spacing paragraphs out?
  19. Hi. I made a profit on here a while ago but I got scared off so didn't interact much. I think I'm finally at a point where I feel ready to fully acknowledge this side of myself and engage with the community. Hopefully we can be friends.
  20. RFK

    New Here.

    I Have been a long lurker on DD , was a member of anther site before they shut down. Time for me to come out of lurker mode and say HI
  21. Hello! I am new here and wanted to introduce myself. My name is Rhys I am 27 I have been a DL/AB for a little over 15 years now. my urges to wear diapers and all of this all started when I was 12 that is at least as far back as I can remember, the type/brands of diapers I like are ABU Cushies they are my favourite and anything with pretty pictures on it >////< I also don't mind going simple as well. just plain white diapers or with one front panel with pictures, items that I have I really don't have that much, I would like to have more but it can be a bit difficult. I guess its time to talk a bit about me.... >///< so going back on how long I been an AB/DL, even though I have been in the AB/DL community for a long time, I really haven't interacted much with the community itself I don't have any friends that are abdl and I don't know anyone who's in abdl, that is in real life that is. I just sort of kept to myself over the years, and I am trying to get out and find more friends and people in the community. ok so a little bit about me I am a bit shy nervous around new people, very caring and understanding person love to help anyone I can, as for hobbies video game I am very much a gamer >////< I used to draw but don't do it so much anymore. I really ejoin just spending time with friends and chat about what we like and just chill. And this may be a bit Obvious but I really really ejoin wetting my diaper >\\\\< as well as messy diaper are great too..... >\\\\\\\< as well as I am very much into humiliation and embarrassment.... >\\< I have one brother and two sisters they are all old then me and live away. I live in East Sussex in a town called Seaford. It's near to Brighton in the UK So that it's for me. I can't wait to get to know all of you I am really looking forward to it. I hope I can make some friends here. Feel free to reply to this with any questions or if you just want to chat. ( just as a side note sorry about all the bad spelling and punctuation I'm dyslexic) Thanks you for reading
  22. Ok so I just got word that there's been talks about a new law that would make printed adult diapers and plastic pants sex toys under US law requiring ID and proof of age to buy abdl products this is an outrage can you imagine how embarrassing it would be to have your mail man card you before delivering your diapers this is horrible I encourage each and every one of you to write your congressmen demanding that they shoot down this outrageous bill before it becomes the law
  23. I just got a pack of the new bear hugz diapers from CTDC and they are amazingly soft and crinkly and have Velcro tapes that are even better than the ones found on tykables also they have a 5000 ml absorption and tall standing leak guards as well as a fantastic nursery print featuring clouds and bears in pastel colors they look so cute that my girlfriend won't even let me wear my PUL pants over them so she can see me in them
  24. I've been using certainty fitted briefs max protection for over 2 years and today I went to buy a new pack and I was surprised to see they had a new look, it got me wondering how different this new design looks and how well they perform. On the left is the new design the right it's the older design. I LOVE these new briefs!! They really improved the way it fits, it's more flexible and with a better leakguard. It feels more like a baby diaper than a hospital diaper. The older design had a smaller guard, it had too much excess material. If u can see the new ones really hug all arround the legs. The old ones made it feel like u needed to readjust Everytime I moved positions, with the new briefs I can spend all day without having to readjust the tapes. I love these diapers thank you wallgreens! Thank you Certainty for listening to your customers and for this great product. I will be buying more!!
  25. This is a story that I hope will be relatable to some of the older members of the board, but not being older myself, I may have greatly missed the mark here. Please feel free to tell me how wrong I am in my assumptions about what it feels like to be an older person in this community. Too Old By: RambleLamb She rolled over in bed and sat up slowly as she draped her legs over the edge of the bed, the plastic sheet over the mattress crinkling loudly performing a duet with the rustling of her diaper as she rubbed her left hand with her right and then the right with her left, cursing her Arthritis mentally as she reached over to the bedside table and retrieved her glasses from their case and put them on. She'd been dreading this day for some time, much the same way she had dreaded this day the year prior and the year before that in the slow march toward her own inevitable demise. She was sixty today, and that was not okay with her. Looking down at her wrinkled hands, and the pale, wrinkled legs protruding from beneath her nightgown she sighed. Her right hand pulled the hem of her nightgown up to display the bulky overnight diaper beneath, the outer surface sharing the yellowy brown of a healing bruise from use in the night. She ran a hand over the surface and sighed heavily, reminiscing about a time when performing that simple action would have sent a pleasant tingle up her spine and been the catalyst to a far more intimate release, but now she was terminally dry in her lady parts, the ravages of time eroding her sex drive and making achieving orgasm an all day affair that she most certainly never had nor made time questing for. Rising from the bed, her knees and ankles popping at the introduction of her weight onto them, she straightened up a little, the muscles and joints in her back and hips straining and groaning as they struggled to get up and running. She shuffled slowly to the bathroom, leaning against the countertop as she worked to release the tapes of her diaper, cursing her Arthritis again as she winced and fumbled with the small swatches of tape on either side of the front of the sodden garment. She managed, like she always did, and the diaper plummeted to the floor with a heavy slapping sound as it hit the linoleum. She'd always enjoyed that sound, recalling the pride she'd felt in her younger years at hearing how heavy her diaper had become by the sharpness of the plop as it bounced off the porcelain and glass surfaces of the bathroom walls and fixtures. Slipping her nightgown off over her head, she turned and looked in the mirror. She saw the thinning silver hair on her head, the age spots and wrinkles that were now a part of her skin, the shriveled blobs that her breasts had become. She saw these things with her eyes, but her mind wasn't able to comprehend them. In her mind she was still that younger woman that would doll herself up in cute little baby outfits and crawl around without a care in the world, the one that would achieve sexual gratification from having her caregiver cradle her in their arms and rub the front of her diaper while she nursed a bottle or pacifier, her cute little squeals and grunts adding to the scene and to her role as the naughty baby. She pushed those memories from her mind, coming back to her current role of an older woman, twice widowed and alone, her play clothes and paraphernalia in a box somewhere in the attic, hidden away from the world never to return, a description she glumly assigned to her libido as she moved to the shower chair she'd had to have installed and set about starting her day. When she was in her twenties she'd been a free spirit, promiscuousness and fluid with her sexuality, not caring what parts her partner came equipped with, just that they were good to her and treated her the way she wanted to be treated. She'd had Daddy's and Mommy's, big brothers and big sisters, babysitters of all sorts, and had even devoted time to being a caregiver herself. Her first foray into the lifestyle had been with a man. She was still subscribing to the antiquated notion that she was supposed to only be with men at this point in her young adult life, that that was the only acceptable pairing because her parents had spoken quite negatively at length about the disgustingness of homosexuality and she certainly wasn't going to disappoint them by exploring that life, though she did quite enjoy the sight of women in diapers, she convinced herself that it was just her imagining herself as them and not being attracted to them. Bruce was her first Daddy, and he had been very much the wrong fit for her. They'd chatted for a while and agreed to meet and he'd forced himself on her and hit her a number of times when she didn't agree to do what he wanted her to. She'd left that relationship very quickly, fleeing in the night while he was out at work and going back home to nurse not only her physical wounds, but her emotional ones as well. She'd taken time away from the lifestyle after Bruce, skittish that he was the rule and not the exception, but the lifestyle was ingrained in her and she couldn't stay away for long, and unexpectedly found herself talking with a girl slightly older than herself at that time, finding that the girl fulfilled her emotionally far better than Bruce had. When they met she'd achieved her first orgasm in her life as Jane, the girl, licked her most intimate area and played with her breasts. Convinced she was gay, she fell in love with Jane quite quickly, attributing her sexual awakening as a sign that Jane was the person she was meant to be with for the rest of her life, but that was just her being naive, and when she'd come home to find Jane in bed with one of their friends she'd felt so hurt and betrayed and was told that she was being ridiculous, that her feelings weren't fair to who Jane was and she'd left with her head spinning and filled with dark thoughts that closed in on her and pushed her to try and take her own life. Over the years she learned about the myriad of sexual identifiers, gay and straight were the obvious ones, but she learned about bisexuality, polyamory, and asexuality and the more she learned the more she saw the mistakes she'd made in her past and grew emotionally and saw that her relationships were more healthy because she was better able to articulate her own wants and needs and understand better those of her partners. By the time she was involved with the man that would be her first marriage, she was feeling like she'd advanced emotionally by leaps and bounds. She and Charles were married in a small park near their apartment, her parents and a few friends in attendance of the brief ceremony. She wore a simple dress, nothing fancy, but it made her feel beautiful and the way he looked at her when they exchanged their vows made her feel like she was the only person in the world as far as he was concerned. They'd gone to the aquarium for their honeymoon, neither having the money to go on a trip, but both being content with Daddy and his little girl walking hand and hand in the aquarium, the dress she'd worn for the wedding being replaced with her shortalls and a cutely patterned diaper beneath. Charles taught her that she could be what she wanted whenever she wanted, allowing her to explore her desires out in the world while also being respectful to those around them that weren't a part of their game. She'd assumed prior to his education of her that playing baby in public would be like things she'd read in the stories on the internet, caricatures of reality with grown adults waddling around in full diapers on complete display as if nothing was wrong with that. With his help, she discovered that she could wear a diaper and cute clothes and no one would know, she could be in public as baby with her Daddy and feel safe and happy and the worst that would happen would be that a few people would give her odd looks. She was with Charles for three years before he was killed by a drunk driver while coming home from work one night. Her world had fallen apart after that, understandably so, and she'd tried and failed once again to take her own life, being institutionalized by her parents for her own safety. In the hospital she'd learned to handle her emotions, worked to come up with solutions to her problems that were less drastic and permanent than suicide or self harm in general, and left the hospital with a more hopeful outlook on her life after it had been restarted with Charles' death. Her second marriage came a year later, a wife this time, and Mary had taught her that she wanted to be forced into things. She'd been afraid at first, memories of Bruce and his abusive treatment of her filling her with doubt and trepidation, which she discussed with Mary and found that they quite easily worked together to find a comfortable way for both of them to get what they wanted and ease into the things she was concerned about, finding that her fears were unnecessary because Mary was not Bruce, and she could force her out of her adulthood and into her babyhood without hurting her or making her feel like she was less than a person outside of the confines of a scene. Her parents had disowned her when she'd told them that she was marrying a woman, and that had greatly upset and disappointed her, but she'd weathered that sadness and stood with her wife to be on the day and felt nothing but love and contentment, her feelings toward her parents shifting to pity for their narrow mindedness instead of turning them on herself and feeling like she was somehow wrong for going against their idea of what she should be. Over her years with Mary she explored other things outside of just baby play, trying pet play with her, occasionally trading her diapers and baby clothes, or clothes in general, for a litter box and a plug with a tail attached to it. She'd spent many nights cuddled next to Mary on the bed or the couch with her head on her lover's lap having her hair stroked as she closed her eyes and purred softly, blushing when she'd crawl off the couch and to her litter box to squat and pee while she and Mary looked at each other, this usually led to Mary taking her to bed and pleasuring her in a variety of ways, forcing her to please Mary in ways that she commanded and ending with the two asleep in each other's arms spent and happy. When Mary got breast cancer they'd discussed her options with the doctors, but found that there really weren't any given the aggressiveness of the cancer. A few months later, in her own bed with her wife holding her hand, Mary passed peacefully after a carefully crafted cocktail of pills was ingested, washed down with milk to keep her from throwing them up. Before she'd called the paramedics, she'd laid there with Mary and cried, wanting to join her wife on the next leg of her journey, but knowing that Mary wouldn't approve, and throughout their time together she'd never disobeyed or disappointed her wife, her Mommy, or her Master and wouldn't sully her final moments with her by going against her wishes. The loss of Mary had forced her to examine herself as a person, to look within and find that part of her that could be comfortable with either being alone or with only enjoying companionship in platonic ways or in the form of one night stands. She was in her forties now, dangerously close to being half a century old, but she still felt young and still wanted to play with other people but she found that the world had gone and gotten faster and less concerned with meaningful relationships in her time contented and away from the scene. She'd spent many nights reading people's posts online looking for playmates and partners, noting how few of them wanted anyone beyond their twenties with resentment and feelings of inadequacy. She often felt like the chaperon at a high school dance, the designated adult in charge of quelling lusty thoughts of fun and frivolity with here mere existence. She indulged in her fantasies alone save for the random encounter with someone that had a fetish for older women in diapers. She wasn't allowed to be a baby in those times, that was deemed unacceptable by those people, they just wanted her to wear the diapers and pleasure them or herself for their enjoyment and she found herself unfulfilled, feeling like she'd regressed socially and emotionally to a point in her life where she was repressed and compromising her own wants and needs just so she wasn't alone with her thoughts at night when the memories of her setbacks and losses decided to plague her. As the years went by she found herself becoming less and less able to relate to the people she was talking to online, having to look up terms they used just to be able to respond but feeling less than confident in her ability to successfully carry on conversations or relate awash in a sea of people that were half her age or more, and she eventually gave up trying and stuck to playing alone entirely. She briefly entertained the idea of trying to meet vanilla people her own age, but reading the profiles on the various dating sites geared toward older people made her feel like she was too wild for anyone she looked at, and she abandoned that endeavor as well. Out of the shower and freshly diapered, a simple outfit of stretchy waisted pants and a floral blouse to cover her, she sat down at her desk and worked on her application to the assisted living facility she'd seen on her trips to the market. She'd been reluctant to resign herself to the fate of being stuffed into a waiting room for death, but then she'd thought about the fact that with nurses and doctors around to take care of her she could simply focus her energies on being a fun old lady, making friends and filling her remaining time with something other than failed human interaction and bitterness at the lives not fulfilled that she'd had to let go of because of forces outside of her control. She knew she wouldn't be able to play baby anymore, that would be forcing her kink onto others, but she felt like at the very least she wouldn't be the only one in diapers and she could pretend that she was somewhere else in her mind. Over the weeks she hired college kids to come and take her boxes from the attic and pack up her belongings so she could move. One of the boys had brought his girlfriend along one of the days and she'd spent the whole day talking to her, having tea and looking at photo albums, and for that day she didn't feel alone. The girl had offered to help her when her diaper had unfortunately leaked after a great amount of laughter listening to a story about a Halloween party where the girl had ended up drunkenly trick or treating with her friends, not realizing in her inebriated state that she'd walked home and stood in front of her parents with a pillowcase half full of candy exclaiming "Trick or treat" like she was a little girl again. She'd excused herself, flushing hotly with embarrassment when the girl explained that she was a nursing student and helped take care of her grandmother, dashing the notion that she was connecting with the girl on a peer level and reminding her once again that she was just an old woman and rather than friendship she was garnering pity from the girl. The girl ignored the declination and hooked arms with her, helping her to the bathroom and finding some dry clothes for her to change into before taking the initiative to remove her pants for her and her diaper, allowing her to stabilize herself on the girl's shoulders as she gently wiped her clean and put a new diaper on her quickly and efficiently, conducting herself in a clinical and professional manner before helping her into the dry pants. The girl had washed her wet pants for her and offered words of compassion as they sat back down. The girl had told her that her grandmother was incontinent as well, and up until she became so senile she couldn't really comprehend what was happening, she'd been embarrassed by having to be cared for like a baby, but the girl explained that she always felt that life was cyclical, we start off unable to feed and dress ourselves and need to have our every need met by someone else and that's how we finish our lives and it was kind of beautiful to her in its simplicity. She'd told the girl that she didn't mind, over sharing that she enjoyed the security and comfort that her diapers brought to her, garnering a raised eyebrow and a slight smile and blush from the girl before she told her that she was proud of her for being so brave and accepting of her age and infirmities. The girl had exchanged contact information with her when the boys were done for the day and they'd hugged and she felt like she genuinely had made a connection with the girl after all and went to bed that night feeling truly happy for the first time in a long while. After finally moving into the assisted living facility, she contacted the girl on a whim and began an online pen pal relationship with her which quickly blossomed into the girl coming once a week to visit her and spend time with her. The once a week evolved into several times a week and the girl began to open up to her about her personal life, talking to her about her failing relationship with her boyfriend and the pressures of school and the prospect of moving out of her parents house and the worries she had about her ability to survive on her own in the big scary world. All of this culminated in the girl expressing her desire to go back to being a little girl again, safe in the knowledge that she was loved and taken care of and only had to worry about cleaning her room and eating her vegetables. She'd put her hand on the girl's knee and smiled at her warmly, telling her that she didn't have to feel like she always needed to be an adult, that she could explore the feelings and desires of returning to a younger and simpler time in her life while also juggling her adult responsibilities. The girl had relaxed noticeably after that and the conversation turned to other things but the subject had tentatively come up the following week with the girl explaining that she'd stopped on the way home at a playground and sat on the swings for a while, and how it had been surprisingly very fun just to feel young and carefree for that short amount of time. Over time the girl had inched further and further into exploring the feelings she was having, showing up one day with her hair in pigtails and a cute little sundress on, standing before the older woman with arms outstretched as she twirled in place to show off her outfit like a proud little girl that had dressed herself for the first time. Throwing caution to the wind, she'd patted her lap to beckon the girl to her, and swelled with happiness when she'd carefully gotten up onto the chair with her, her weight mostly supported by the plush arm of the chair rather than the calcium deficient bones of the aged woman. The girl smelled like bubblegum or something else youthful and sweet, and she smiled and rested her head on the older woman's shoulder as she was hugged and had her back rubbed softly. The girl had quietly confessed, mostly into the space between the two as she had her face pointed down with her head on the older woman's shoulder, that her grandmother had passed a few months earlier and that she felt the same bond between herself and the older woman she was currently with that she did with her grandmother, but not in a blood relation way. The conversation had stopped there, the girl blushing hotly and excusing herself, making an excuse for why she had to suddenly depart, leaving the older woman to write a very long and personal email to her young friend. Dearest Samantha, You left today very abruptly and I'm worried about why that is. I want you to know that if you're feeling something about our friendship that concerns you that you can talk to me about it. I promise you that there is nothing you could say to me that would make me cherish our friendship any less. As I've told you before, I was married twice before, once to a man and once to a woman, and both of them taught me a lot about who I was and what I could be, they helped me to see that what I choose to be and do in my life is no one's business but my own and that of my partner and I'd very much like to be able to help you in that same way if you're struggling with trying to understand yourself. When you were here today you looked very cute in your sundress and pigtails, you retained your wonderful personality while also allowing yourself to let go of the misconception that you need to dress and act your age, you seemed very happy, like you'd stumbled upon a profound personal secret that gave you a deep satisfaction and fulfillment for a need that you may not have been entirely aware was so strong within you. If I'm not being too forward, I think you're discovering that you're little, which is to say that you're someone that finds enjoyment in indulging in simpler or cuter things and behaviors, like stopping at a playground and swinging on the swingset or wearing your hair in pigtails. I believe that if you explore these desires you'll find that there's a whole world out there that will provide you with pleasures that satisfy them and give you something that keeps you balanced in the times where you're required to be a responsible adult. I hope that you read this and continue to explore these feelings I believe you're having and if you decide to come for another visit I hope that you'll feel comfortable asking questions that may make your tummy feel like it's doing summersaults. If you don't decide to come back I understand, I will miss you greatly, but I also don't want you to feel like you need to force yourself to be uncomfortable for my benefit. You're a very bright young woman and I know that you'll have a successful career and a very happy life and I will always cherish meeting you and every second we've spent together. Thank you for being a bright spot in my life when I needed it the most. Yours always, Sylvia P.S. If I'm at all correct in any of my assumptions, I advise you to search "Ageplay" and see if anything in those results speaks to you. Several days went by without a response from Samantha, and life went on for Sylvia, it wasn't as exciting or interesting as it would have been had the younger girl come to visit, but Sylvia knew that the girl needed time to process everything and that maybe she wouldn't come back, that she'd been scared off by the older woman and her strange email and would tell the story to her girlfriends and they'd all laugh at the silly old woman and her bizarre advice and predilections. A full week after Samantha had rushed out and Sylvia had sent her email the younger woman showed up for a visit. Sylvia smiled when she saw the girl wearing a pink corduroy pair of overalls, her hair again in pigtails, and her fashionable sandals replaced with pink velcro secured shoes. The girl looked like a large toddler as she stood in the entryway of the room and Sylvia took a gamble and patted her lap again to beckon the girl to her. Samantha had nervously shuffled closer after closing the door to the room, her cheeks pinkening as she moved closer, once again taking a place on the older woman's lap and once again resting her head on her shoulder as the older woman hugged her and gently rocked them both in the chair. "Did you look at what I suggested?" Sylvia asked, knowing that the girl being there dressed as she was meant she absolutely had. Samantha nodded but didn't say anything. Sylvia smiled. "Good girl." she praised, daring to kiss the top of the girl's head as she rubbed her back in small circles. "Did you learn anything?" she asked. Again, Samantha nodded but said nothing. Sylvia pulled the girl away from her and gently lifted her chin with two of her fingers. "Did a kitty get your tongue on the way over here?" she asked, her smile warm and her tone soft and sweet. Samantha smiled and let out a small giggle as she shook her head. "No-" she paused and her face flushed again before she continued. "Nana." she added, her eyes beginning to water. Sylvia's heart melted and she hugged the girl to her again, shushing her as she began to rock them both again. "Hush now, sweet girl, Nana's here." she cooed softly. As Samantha began to cry tears of happiness her thumb slipped into her mouth, and Sylvia felt her heart fill with love and a sense of completeness she thought she'd never feel again as she realized she wasn't too old to be in this kind of relationship, she just needed to adapt her role to find something that fit her best and that role was one of a loving Nana to an adorable adult little girl.
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