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So, this "story" was born of a random poll option that I posted on a much better story of mine. Basically, as is my nature, I included a joke option that was "Civil War Documentary" and for some reason people voted for it. It didn't win, but because the whole point of the poll was to give me genres to try my hand at, I stupidly decided to do this. This is a waste of everyone's time, including my own, and should anyone read it, you know who you are, please don't lie and tell me it's good, be straight up with me and tell me I'm a foolish, adorable fool for writing this. Also, in case anyone actually does like this story, seek professional help, seriously, I am worried for your mental state. On the serious tip, I tried really hard to make this work and some of it kind of did but I feel like the anorexic premise kind of fell apart somewhere near the middle and I basically just hate fucked it to the finish line. Maybe I'm wrong and overly critical, but on a scale of one to ten, this story is maybe a three at best. Meh, I've got other things in the pipeline, good things, things with actual story and everything! Also, also, during my research for this "story" I discovered that Captain America never fought in the Civil War, history is fucking bullshit, y'all! #references #booknotmovie #capwasright Banjo and harmonica folk rendition of "Sweet Home Alabama" plays throughout as Sepia toned photographs of Union and Confederate soldiers wearing cloth diapers, seated on the ground playing together as nurses supervise, smiling at the antics of their charges. An image of a nurse giving a sponge bath to a young soldier that's smiling widely as he appears to be clapping his hands happily. An image of a bearded man squatting down in only a cloth diaper, a look of concentration on his face as a young nurse stands behind him with a knowing smile on her face. Narrator: Hello, I'm Morgan Freeman. When you think of the Civil War, you think of brother fighting brother, you think of a nation ripped apart by a struggle that's still relevant to this day. We've heard the stories from the front lines of both the Union and Confederate armies, we've heard the stories of those in attendance at the Gettysburg Address and we thought that every possible shred of information about this historic event had been unearthed, but today we bring you something new, from the perspective of those soldiers that were destroyed mentally by the horrors of war and from the women that went above and beyond to care for their patients. Join us as we look into the tragic story of The Infantile Infantry, a small group of young men that gave up their weapons and uniforms for diapers and a simpler life. The images of the soldiers and nurses fade away and the front of a University is shown. Cut to a young Asian woman in her mid twenties seated in a chair being fitted with a microphone. A nameplate graphic displays "Ashley Chen" as her name with a title below reading "ABDL Historian/President of ABDL Club at Arizona State University". Ashley is wearing a light pink t-shirt with a vintage Pampers logo printed across the chest. Ashley Chen: My name is Ashley Chen and I'm a self proclaimed "ABDL Historian". Basically I spend as much of my free time as possible trying to establish how far back the desire to wear diapers and indulge in infantile behavior as a fetish goes in human history. Most of the time we see very few historically relevant instances of ABDL, that's Adult Baby/Diaper Lover, behavior in history, we've had a few lucky breaks, letters and photographs from Marilyn Monroe to President Kennedy of her wearing a diaper and referring to him as "Daddy". An image of Marilyn Monroe on her back with her legs kicking up in the air, an obviously used cloth diaper pinned around her waist is shown on the screen next to a letter that reads: "Dear, Daddy, I can't wait to see you again, baby needs another messy horsey ride! Love, Baby" Ashley Chen: There was the conformation that the colony of Roanoke that disappeared mysteriously was heavily into the infantilization of the females of the colony, which we as a community downplayed because of the negative image it painted for our culture. A drawing of two colonist women nursing from the large, milk filled breasts of another colonist woman, all three swaddled in primitive cloth diapers is shown followed by a drawing of a young boy of maybe ten walking with an older woman, most likely his mother, and a young girl of maybe four, his sister, crawling behind him in the dirt, their "diapers" visible beneath their dresses. The final drawing is of a large room, possibly a church or communal gathering structure full of women of varying ages and states of dress seated for the the drawing, some in the process of being changed out of their used "diapers" some sexually servicing their "Daddy's", also of varying ages, and some sitting dumbly like the empty headed babies they're expected to be and are treated as. Ashley Chen: When we came across the "Infantile Infantry", we were quite amazed, the whole situation seemed too good to be true, like we'd stumbled upon an actual Diaper Dimension. She giggles and her faces takes on a look of pleasant longing for a brief moment before her face slightly flushes and she clears her throat. Ashley Chen: The first piece of evidence we found was a letter from a nurse stationed at a, as of then, unknown field hospital. She'd written the letter to her husband, not knowing he'd been killed when the family farm was taken over by militia members from the Confederacy. The letter in question is shown in a graphic next to a weathered photo of a young woman in her early twenties with a much older man's head cradled in her lap, looking down at him as he nurses from her breast. "Dearest James, I hope this letter finds you well. I'm writing to tell you that I am well despite the savage nature of this war. I've been tasked with caring for soldiers from both sides of the battle, but have yet to see even a drop of blood. I was so worried this would be a macabre spectacle of death and carnage, but I find myself in very familiar surroundings. This outpost was established by a nurse from up North, Mary Chalmers, she told us that the men we're caring for have suffered so much in their minds from the things they've seen that they've simply given up the ability to function as adults. Rather than treating wounds and removing limbs we've been tasked with caring for these men as if they were our own children. I've been given the job of Wet Nurse as I'm still producing milk from our most recent blessing. The men here are as innocent and pure as our little Agnes, crying when they're in need of a feeding or when they need their soiled garments changed. One of them called me "Mama" the other day, and I wept openly as I held him to my breast. I am well, my love, and I hope this letter finds you and our family safe and shielded from the war outside. I hope to hear back from you soon. Warmest Regards, Sarah Ashley Chen: We used the letter to search for Mary Chalmers and when we found her we discovered that she was basically a professional Mommy before anything like that existed. Her work at the hospital she worked at prior to starting the field hospital was basically a Regression Therapy ward. We found detailed notes depicting her beliefs that bringing someone down to the level of an infant or small child was beneficial to treating psychological traumas. She produces a small stack of papers and begins reading the first one. Ashley Chen: "Mary Jones, age twenty-seven, mother of four, suffering from severe depression and desires to harm herself and her children. Upon arrival to the ward, Mary was bathed and dressed in the requisite cloth diaper, we then swaddled her and placed her in one of the bassinets on the ward for a period of rest. Mary struggled initially but soon calmed as she was nursed by one of the wet nurses on staff and was sleeping peacefully through the night. Upon waking, Mary's struggling resumed but turned into a fit when she was denied use of the facilities to relieve her bladder and bowels. Once her body had dealt with those issues as we'd prescribed, she became much more docile and was promptly changed into fresh attire and was nursed once more and allowed to play with a doll while we explained to her what our goals for her were. Ashley thumbs through the papers and pulls out one from the middle. Ashley Chen: "Mary Jones left us today, relinquished to the custody and care of her former husband and now adoptive father, Harold and his new wife, Beatrice. After six months at our facility, Mary no longer holds the depressive thoughts and emotions she exhibited when she arrived. I personally sat with her in the lobby of the hospital as we waited for her new parents to arrive. I'd put her in a short dress, one to match her favorite dolly's, and ensured that she was thickly swaddled to protect from her now total lack of control of her bodily functions. The concern for myself and for the doctor assigned to her case was that Mary would prove hostile when the realization that her husband was now her adoptive father and that he had taken a new wife, Mary's younger sister, Beatrice, making the younger girl both Mary and Mary's children adoptive mother. The extensive treatment during Mary's time here proved quite successful as Mary simply smiled and drooled when she saw the familiar faces of her family. She did begin to bawl when she soiled herself, but that's true of any infant, she simply sucked on her fist and and was led by the hand to her new life by her former son and now older brother." Ashley is flushed and clearly struggling to compose herself. Her nipples are clearly erect beneath her Pampers shirt, and she's fidgeting quite a bit in her seat. Interviewer: Are you alright, Ms. Chen, you look a bit flustered. Ashley hides a smile and looks over at another woman across the room. Ashley Chen: If we could take a little break, I need to- She pauses for a moment, stifling a small giggle. Ashley Chen: confer with my colleague for a moment. Video recording was stopped as the camera crew and the interviewer left the room, but Ashley was still miked and everything said during our time out of the room was recorded, here is the transcript of that recording. Other Female: You okay, baby? A faint rustling sound is heard. Ashley Chen: I really didn't think I would react like that with all these people and cameras here. I am so unbelievably horny right now reading these accounts out loud. The sound of walking is heard and then what appears to be kissing. Other Female: Does Mama's little girl need some special attention? The kissing sounds resume after a few moments of movement and rustling, then the sounds of tape ripping occur and then a series of moans and panting leading to a quickly silenced scream of passion. When the crew returned Ashley was sucking a pacifier and a balled up diaper was in the corner of the room. Interviewer: What was the feeling of your group when all of this new information was discovered? Ashley Chen: When we found this account, and the hundreds of others like it, we knew we'd stumbled upon a veritable treasure trove of ABDL history. Something like this is like a forgotten tomb or proof of alien existence or something, it's huge. We went into full research mode immediately and it led us to the field hospital where we discovered that Mary Chalmers had continued her work in a setting that would truly test the efficacy of her treatment. Fade out Morgan Freeman: The ABDL Historical community was literally wetting themselves with excitement over this new discovery, but the less historical minded parts of the community were surprisingly less enthusiastic. Fade in: The exterior of a small house is shown, inside we're shown an adult sized nursery with a young man of twenty two sitting cross legged inside of the crib, the side rails down. He's a large man with a neck beard and thick black glasses that he pushes up as his name and title appear beneath him "PoppyBabby666, ABDL Community Spokesperson". He's wearing a baby blue pair of footed pajamas with an obvious bulge around the waist and he's drinking chocolate milk from a baby bottle. Interviewer: As a spokesperson for your community, what is the consensus regarding the discovery of the works of Mary Chalmers and the Infantile Infantry? PoppyBabby666: Utter bullshit. He finishes his bottle and belches loudly, the sound bringing a woman in her mid to late forties to the room. She takes the bottle from him and pats him on the head before leaving the nursery. PoppyBabby666: The things the "ABDL Historical Community" have found over the years are nothing more than fantasy. Someone over there, probably that dyke cunt Ashley Chen, found something that made mention of radical treatment at one random hospital around that time and glommed onto it like it was the gospel. They blew it way out of proportion and the fantasy became so great for them that they bought into their own hype! He gets on his hands and knees in the crib and begins grunting and straining, obviously filling his diaper right in front of everyone in the room without any shame or consideration for us. When he's finally finished he sits back down as if nothing has happened. Interviewer: Do you need us to give you a moment to take care of that? He shakes his head and calls out "Mom" and the older woman returns, chiding him for being so rude to his guests as she begins changing his diaper then and there. The process is disgusting and one of our cameramen vomited and left at the sight of it. With a clean diaper on her "baby", the older woman leaves, depositing the soiled diaper in the almost full to bursting pail on her way out. PoppyBabby666: My mom is really supportive of my lifestyle choice, I just wish she was hotter, y'know? Interviewer: How did you come to be the spokesperson for your community? PoppyBabby666: I posted a thread on my forum asking for people if they wanted the title and they all said I was the best choice to speak for us and I agreed so here we are. No records of this supposed post could be found anywhere on the forums PoppyBabby666 posts on. In fact, during our investigation we discovered that not only is he not in good standings with his community, but there are several threads openly mocking him for living at home with his mother and being her full time Adult Baby. In these threads, PoppyBabby666 quickly turns to name calling and swearing when faced with rational and quite reasonable arguments for why he's a "fat, lazy piece of shit". We returned to Ashley Chen after our brief and uncomfortable interview with PoppyBabby666, and discussed our conversation with him. Interviewer: Do you know who PoppyBabby666 is? Ashley rolls her eyes at the mere mention of PoppyBabby666. Her demeanor becomes much more serious and she is obviously very angry. Ashley Chen: That fat son of a bitch has been a thorn in my side for years now. He's shit all over every single thing we've discovered and made completely unjust claims about us falsifying our findings and exaggerating the truth so it fits whatever fantasy he claims we have. Did he shit his diaper in front of you guys without any kind of consent from you? Interviewer: Actually, yes, it was quite awkward and terrible. Ashley nods. Ashley Chen: That's kind of his thing. General consensus is that he does it to establish dominance, if that makes any kind of sense. He wants you to know that he's "a wittle bitty babby dat can't contwol hims poopoos" but really, he's just a sick fuck that pushes his fetish onto unsuspecting people and makes them unwilling participants in his sick ass delusions. I went to visit him once after he invited me to his house to settle our differences of opinion. I reluctantly accepted, expecting to have a mature and reasonable conversation with an adult peer, but when I got their he was naked except for a diaper and playing in a playpen in the living room. I should have bolted right then and there, but I pushed forward in the hopes that maybe if he was comfortable in his little fantasy world he'd be more agreeable to deal with, but no. Not five minutes into our "meeting" and he was squatting down and shitting himself, staring at me the whole time. Then, he sat down and started rubbing the front of his diaper as he sucked his thumb and I hard noped the fuck out of there. He is by far the most disgusting and disgraceful member of the ABDL community, and this is a community that has people buying sex dolls made to look like little anime girls that they can diaper and fuck. Ashley shudders visibly and looks a little ill. Ashley Chen: Sorry, I'm fine, it's just that I love this community so much because of what it means to me but then I remember all the dark and terrible corners full of degenerate assholes and it squicks me the fuck out. Interviewer: It seems as though the ABDL community is embroiled in its own Civil War. Ashley nods softly Ashley Chen: Sadly, you're not far off. I mean, we're not going to kill each other or anything, but there's definitely enough bitterness and hatred that's just boiling under the surface waiting for a spark to set the whole thing off. I personally would just like to see everyone on the same page, seeing that our community has existed for longer than we thought possible, and celebrate that fact as a group rather than turn into tantrum throwing babies just because someone says something you don't believe or agree with. Morgan Freeman: Shortly after our crew left Ashley Chen the ABDL forums erupted into chaos. Ms. Chen posted remarks about PoppyBabby666 and encouraged everyone to watch the documentary when it came out to see just what kind of person he was. PoppyBabby666 fired back and gained supporters that were tired of Ashley's know it all attitude and willingness to publicly tear down a member of the community to a national audience. The battle culminated in death threats from both sides and numerous people being given a seventy two hour ban from all forum activities. Stock photo images of crying babies and people sitting at computers angry and frustrated glide across the screen. Morgan Freeman: While banned from the forums, Ashley took to social media and continued her crusade against PoppyBabby666. Tweets from Ashley Chen appear on the screen. Ashley Chen: What a colossal waste of space, PoppyBabby666 is! Ashley Chen: I can't believe I got banned because of that diaper shitting obsessed asshole! Ashley Chen: I love PoppyBabby666 and am just pwetending to hate him because I wish I could poopy my diapies in fwont of hims Ashley Chen: Someone clearly hacked my account, three guesses who's behind it. I am impressed that he could stop shitting himself long enough to orchestrate something like that though. Ashley Chen: My name is Ashley Elaine Chen and I live at 141221 East ShadyGlen Drive, Tuscon, Arizona, 85721 I invite anyone in the area to drop by and tell my parents Kai and Deborah all about what a naughty little girl I am Ashley Chen: Okay that's not cool that's my actual address and those are my parents names this has gone too far Morgan Freeman: That was the last tweet from Ashley Chen before the police were called out to her residence for a report of a fight breaking out. Apparently, several supporters of PoppyBabby666 showed up at the house and began throwing soiled diapers at it. When Ashley and her parents went out to stop them they were attacked and beaten, injuring a few of their assailants before succumbing to the brutality before police arrived. While the family was in the hospital their house was broken into and a fire was started, leaving them homeless. We tried to contact Ashley after she was released from the hospital but were told that her parents refused to let her participate in our documentary any further after the attack, and we were told not to contact Ashley any further. PoppyBabby666 was arrested for organizing the hacking of Ashley Chen's twitter account as well as being involved in the attack on her and her family. He was sentenced to thirty years in a Federal Penitentiary without the possibility of parole. A day after his conviction he was found beaten to death in his cell, no charges were filed against any of the other inmates on his block. With Ashley Chen unable and unwilling to speak with us, and PoppyBabby666 dead, we thought we'd reached the end of our investigation until we got an anonymous package, when we opened it we found a collection of copies of all of Ashley Chen's findings, not just about the "Infantile Infantry", but every bit of evidence about every discovery the ABDL Historical community had found to date. The final piece of the puzzle had arrived, and the truth it revealed about the Infantile Infantry shook our team to their very core. We will warn you, these images are deeply upsetting. Pictures of Confederate and Union soldiers standing over the diaper clad bodies of the members of the Infantile Infantry as though they were successfully hunted animals appear on the screen. The nurses are huddled together to one side of the picture on their knees in the dirt, all clearly upset, most bare breasted, probably attacked as they nursed their charges. Morgan Freeman: A letter written by the leader of a militia group made up of members from both sides of the war was found alongside the pictures, giving a chilling insight into why such a senseless attack amid a war full of senseless violence occurred. The letter appears on the screen. Written by one Colonel Angus Masterson. Morgan Freeman: "Our search for the yellow bellied scoundrels what defected from our ranks is over. With the combined forces of Union and Confederate forces, we searched the area between the two camps and found the dogs playing infant out in the woods with a bunch of milk maids and nurses what also defected. Our orders were clear, kill the traitors and bring the nurses back to the camp for the boosting of morale for the loyal troops. Some of the men already took their morale boost during the chaos of finding the camp, those women sure did scream something fierce, but a taste of the butt of a rifle calms the frantic nerves of a lady pretty quick. Once the traitors are buried we'll divide up the women and disband our union to pick up the fight another day. Colonel Angus Masterson" The letter fades out and is replaced by more images of the bodies of the Infantile Infantry piled up in a mass grave, the nurses weeping beside it, several lying unconscious near the attacking soldiers. Morgan Freeman: Thus ends the tragic tale of the Infantile Infantry, a misunderstood band of conscientiousness objectors that were deemed traitors by their respective allies. The fact that the hatred of these men was so great that it inspired the warring factions of the Civil War to unite to vanquish the misunderstood group of men speaks volumes about the intolerance that ABDL's face and that even now, over a hundred and fifty years continue to deal with misunderstanding and intolerance that sadly results in violence. Why we made a documentary about this when racial discrimination, gender inequality, and hate crimes against people of color, creed, and sexual orientation run rampant in our country and around the world is beyond me, but the check cleared, so this has been Morgan Freeman sharing with you a look at something you didn't know you needed in your life, or maybe you fell asleep during a Ken Burns documentary and Netflix auto played this for you. Whatever the reason, I thank you for joining me and forgetting about me Bill Cosbying those women...allegedly. Banjo and harmonica folk rendition of "Sweet Home Alabama" plays as Morgan Freeman smiles awkwardly and the screen goes black as the closing credits roll. Written By RambleLamb Directed By Louie (RambleLamb's Cat) Lighting A desk lamp and the glow of a laptop screen The Director would like to thank the following people for their involvement: Morgan Freeman Ashley Chen Coffee All the people that thought this would work as a story The Director would like to chastise the following people for their involvement: Morgan Freeman PoppyBabby666 Leaky diapers All the people that thought this would work as a story For more information about ABDL's throughout history, visit your local library, if they're still a library and not like a Starbucks or Chick-fil-A or something then they probably have a computer you can use to search for this story, the one you just read. Honestly though, if you're at the library and, again, it's still actually a library, you should probably just read a book, or buy drugs from someone outside the library and imagine some shit for yourself. (sings softly) Butterfly in the sky I can go twice as high Take a look It's in a book A reading rainbow Are you still reading this? The story is over. Although we've come to the end of the road, still, I can't let go. Yeah, dropping some Bone Thugs N' Harmony up in this bitch...wait, no, Boyz II Men, sorry everyone, it's so hard to keep track of amazing artists sometimes! Don't revoke my street cred off of this, I need that shit to be able to hold my head up high when I walk past the little yo's on the corner, they look up to me...not really, I'm a little white girl in the hood, they probably just worry about my safety and question my life choices. Whelp, that about does it for me, kids. I'm gonna leave you with a parting quote to inspire you all to be the best human being you can and to keep your chin up. "Style violent, give a fuck if you don't like it, kids. You can all run backwards naked through a field of dicks." - Run The Jewels, "Oh My Darling Don't Cry"