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Found 3 results

  1. Over the last two weeks I've slowly noticed that I've slipped from diaper training into diaper dependency. As I reported before, I was only a DL for number 1 for many years, but a little more than 5 years ago I asked myself whether I could do something to get more diaper dependent. This now seems to me to have been absolutely successful. However, I never had the urge to become a bedwetter or completely incontinent. I decided to achieve an OAB. The problem with this in recent years was that I wore a diaper during the day and used it when I felt the slightest urge. But then the evening got in the way. I was tired from work and regularly fell asleep while watching TV! During this time and also at night, my bladder took over its task again and stored a lot of urine. That's why I hadn't made much progress until a year ago. Since a lot has changed for me in the meantime, I no longer fall asleep in front of the TV in the evenings, and I usually go to the toilet 4-6 times when I'm well hydrated, because I don't need to wear diaper at home. And at night? I used to sleep for 4-5 hours, then wake up with a painful bladder and have to urinate a lot, in the past. Sleep again and then it was morning. For months now I've been waking up about 2.5 - 3 hours after falling asleep and have to let out a much smaller amount, so the urge to pee starts much earlier for me, then I sleep for another 3 - 3.5 hours and have to again. Until last week, I always wore a diaper during the day and also wore it at home to continue training. But I have now completely changed this little by little. Little by little I no longer wear a diaper at home, because the training is now over, I can and have to go to the toilet as often as I feel the urge to pee. As soon as I leave the house, it is unthinkable for me to go without a diaper because I usually have the need to pee after 20-30 minutes, when I am well hydrated, and then at the same intervals after that. The stress of constantly having to go to the toilet when shopping in the city, which in Germany usually costs between 50 cents and 1 euro - the diaper is actually cheaper. As I said, I have to go to the toilet between 4-8 times in 3 hours during the day, which again depends on sweating and hydration. I'm also absolutely dependent on diapers when I go somewhere where I'm around a lot of people. Of course, that doesn't even mean that I necessarily need a diaper when I go for a walk in the forest, I can always relieve myself behind a tree. So I have now fully identified myself as a person with an irritable bladder. I can do without diapers, but then I often have to find the opportunity to relieve myself without being seen. What was important to me along the way, however, was that although I trained and hadn't made any progress for a long time, I never put myself under pressure. Only recently did I notice my progress more and more casually, and only after thinking about it did I realize that it had previously been due to falling asleep in front of the television! Since I more or less want to develop urge incontinence - and that's exactly how I say it because I don't want to put myself under pressure here either - I'm sticking to the path of peeing regularly at short intervals. Urge incontinence will probably result from this doing anyway. How many times have I coughed and thought that it just didn't go down the tube, maybe I need to relax a little more here. But I think I'm on the right track! And now at the end a little summary. I've passed the threshold of training and am dependent on diapers in the way I want, without have to wear no diaper now and then. But I have an overactive bladder and a diaper helps manage this better! It makes me proud of myself but also vulnerable at the same time because I'm no longer quite the same as other healthy people, but I've achieved this through my own training! And I am now the way I last wanted myself to be, body in harmony with the idea of my body, and all in context with a diaper dependency. It looks for me in this context like BIID, too!
  2. I'm going 24/7 and using my diapers for everything and 24/7 will be expensive, especially when just starting out. I need to know some recommendations for a brand or cycle of brands that I can rely on. I only plan to change 3-4 times in a 24 hr period, preferably 3, but no more than 4 under normal circumstances. It could be a brand that can hold up well on its own for day and night time without a booster, or a brand that hold up well for day time on its own, but I don't mind using a booster for night time. I could also have a set day time diapers, and a night time diaper. I may get emergency cloth diaper but I'm mainly sticking to disposables for their convenience for my partial fecal incontinence due to my IBS. Another word of advice I'd like is maybe some cheap sources to buy diapers from in bulk as well as other supplies, like wipes, powder, etc. Maybe some efficiency questions like baby vs adult wipes. Any suggestions?
  3. As the title says I might already be incontinent to a degree. I am sure I am incontinent to enough of a degree where it would be more convenient to go with diapers 24/7 than without. I have something called Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) that seems to match the symptoms I experience. Usually bipolar bowels being constipated one moment then becoming too loose and urgent to hold comfortably the next. I have not yet seen a doctor about it yet but I am confident this what I have. My self diagnoses usually turn out to be right. I'm sure I could fix the constipation with a simple diet change but the looseness will likely still remain. that said, It's more convenient for me to just wear diapers and soil myself and get cleaned up my fiance/caregiver than struggle to hold it uncomfortably to reach a toilet or run to a toilet and get a shart or two off before I reach it. I remain convinced that diapers are my best bathroom option. Despite all of this, I want to wear 24/7 and achieve some degree of full incontinence on both ends anyway due to Body Integrity Identity Disorder (BIID) so in a funnily ironic way, this development only ends up helping me in the long run. Funny how things seem to fall into place like that.
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