dribblez

You make an interesting observation @oznl. My range is now unpredictable, from as little as 45 minutes to 3 hours, but like you, if I manage to hold for a long time and pee in the toilet, my bladder seems to decide it's not going to put up with any more abuse, and withdraws its labour with inevitable results. As for volumes, they also oscillate wildly now when I use the toilet, from surprisingly large torrents to times when I respond to a strong urge, only to produce a pathetic teacup full. Strange times indeed.

I lost my father almost five years ago, and it was a traumatic and protracted process. I hope you are spared that, but to have both parents in hospital at the same time must be very difficult. Stay strong. Obviously I can only guess what your stepdad meant, but I would have thought it unlikely that he was referring to an incident 30 years ago. I strongly suspect that my wife said something to my mother a couple of years back. I have never been hospitalized and am a very infrequent visitor at the doctor's. Unlike my wife whose favourite reading is the long lists of possible side effects which come with medications and googling smallpox every time she detects a skin blemish. I was chatting to my mother and said something like, "oh well, you know how obsessed my wife is with docotors and hospitals", to which she replied, "perhaps you should go to see a doctor". The air froze before I changed the subject. Not long after my wife said she was going to ask our sister-in-law for advice on mattress protectors because she is caring for her father who is in the late stages of dementia. I made it clear that I did not want my bedwetting or underwear preferences discussed with anyone, and I think she has respected that. Which is a long-winded way of saying that your mother may have noticed something and had a woman to woman chat with your wife, before discussing it with your stepdad. Or perhaps your wife asked your mother if you had a history of bed wetting. Who knows? But my advice would be to try to put all of that at the back of your mind and operate a don't ask, don't tell policy. People will find out, but as I think we both now know, life goes on, albeit with a small elephant in the corner of the room.

After five years of wearing 24/7, although mostly wearing pull-ups and going to the potty in the day, I have probably been dependent for some time without realising it. One incident last year confirmed the extent of my dependency however. We were going to a wedding a 5 hour drive away, and I made sure to empty my bladder before leaving the house and diapering up with a booster. An hour and a half into the journey, and I was damp after a couple of authorized releases. My wife decided she needed a toilet break, so we pulled into a service station. She sprinted off, leaving me to lock the car. Unfortunately she had packed the back-up key fob in her purse, leaving me wondering why the car would not lock. I opened and closed all the doors, but still the damn thing would not lock. Meanwhile pressure was building downstairs. After about 5 minutes I felt a warming sensation and could not stop things. Eventually my wife reappeared and nonchalantly announced that the spare key fob was in her purse when I said that I hadn't been able to lock the car. She was keen to get moving again, and although wet by now I estimated that I probably had enough capacity to get me to our destination. And so it was that we arrived with me urgently needing a change but still outwardly dry. Night time is a different matter. My first genuine night time accident happened about 3 years in, and now I wake 3 or 4 times a week with a wet nappy and no recollection of how that happened. Daytime is more complicated. Some days my range is down to about 45 minutes, other times it can be a couple of hours, and I have started to notice small daytime accidents. So dependent, yes, with the likelihood that the slow downward drift will continue. And it does not bother me a bit.

I think there are three possibilities here: 1. Everyone around you was pretty drunk. As we know, alcohol lowers inhibitions, but nobody said, "Hey buddy, your diapers are showing." 2. Everyone was pretty drunk and they saw a blurry expanse of tighty whities. 3. Your friends know you wear diapers, presumably because of some there-but-for-the-grace-of-God-go-I medical condition, and they don't care. If nobody says anything in the next few days, and it is very unlikely that they will, life will go on and nobody noticed, or if they did, they don't care. 1. Everyone around you was a bit drunk. Alcohol, as we all know, makes us less inhibited, so if it had been that obvious someone might have said, "Hey buddy, your diaper's showing." But they didn't. 2. Everyone around you was a bit drunk and what they saw were some slightly blurry tighty whities. 3. Your friends know that you wear diapers, presumably because of some the-re but for-the-grace-of-God

For those of you of a squeamish disposition, this is not what you think it is. It's worse, much worse. After five years of 24/7, I have been wetting at night on and off for about two years. It has gone from once in a blue moon to a couple of times a month to where I am now, which is 3 or 4 times a week. I woke just before 5am as usual, thinking I was dry, but a quick feel down there told me otherwise. Warm and swollen. My wife always slumbers on for at least two hours as I go about my morning routine. Coffee, a crossword, a depressing scroll through Twitter, cleaning out the log burner, laying the breakfast table, bringing in the firewood and then a shower and nappy change. It's usually at this point that the love of my life emerges to face the world. With a face like thunder, she asked me if I knew I had pooped the bed. No, I didn't. In fact I was sure I hadn't. My bladder control might be slipping, but you could set your clock by my bowel control. I briefly thought of showing her the inside of my nappy, but a quick glance at my wife told me that would be a very bad idea. So I went to examine the crime scene. Ther was indeed a large brownish streak, about 3 inches long. At about the point where my chest had been. A closer inspection showed a lot of debris in the surrounding area. An even closer inspection showed what looked like legs and a mangled body. At some point in the night I had clearly snuggled up to what by British standards was a large arachnid and crushed it, mashing its mangled remains into the bed sheet. Confronted with the evidence, my wife concurred and went off on one of her favourite rants about the number of spiders in her house. Despite a frenzied assault with a battery of stain removers and a wash, the stain remains visible, if somewhat faded.

This is a very good story. Definitely worth the wait!

Thanks @oznl Yep, the same crystals. I used polyacrylate crystals in the garden a couple of years back to try to cut down on watering in the summer. They seem to have disappeared. Anyway, this is starting to sound like a gardening column, and my interest in gardening extends only in trying to maintain a semblance of control over what would otherwise rapidly turn into an eyesore. Having said that, I may come back to this with the results of my experiment next year.

I suppose it gets quicker with practice, but it took me about 5 minutes to recycle 2 days' worth this morning. Nothing much is growing now, but the weeds certainly like my new compost.

I'm facing a similar problem @Little Belle. In order to reduce the amount of waste going to landfill we will be allowed 3 bags of general waste on a 3 week cycle. My wife looked into it, and we could have semi-transparent yellow bags (bins not allowed) for my nappies. She thought that was OK, but we have some particularly unpleasant neighbours who would no doubt broadcast the news to the few remaing people in our street they haven't yet fallen out with. So my solution has been to compost the padding. Only the plastic shells and boosters go in the black bags. We are now down to one and a bit bags every 2 weeks as a result. The experiment is ongoing but looking promising. The first batches of compost (a mix of kitchen scraps, garden waste and dead nappies) have gone onto the flower beds. It is slightly smelly, although the smell disappears quickly in the open air. I should add that I only use my nappies for pee. The gel does give it a slimy texture in places, but early indications are that the gel will eventually disappear. You can buy gel in crystal form for garden use, the idea being that it improves moisture retention in the summer. I have used it before, and it also seems to break down. As a side note, I tried composting Megamaxes, but they are constructed differently to lesser products, with a rectangular sheet of gel in the padding, and I would not recommend trying to do an autopsy on one of those - too much faff and fishing out the cold, slimy gel insert is not one of life's pleasures. As it happens Megamaxes appear to have become extinct in these parts. Would I put the compost on beds where I grow fruit and veg? I'm not sure. The pee would certainly boost crops, but I'm not sure what other chemicals are in the padding. Perhaps that's a question for our resident professor of nappyology, @oznl.

That's interesting @Little Sherri. I've had a couple of those abrasions at the top of my thigh too, but only on the right hand side and only after wearing Rearz poducts, although weirdly @oznl's Barry seems not to cause this. At first I thought it was an infection, but a couple of days in non Rearz products and a spot of Sudocreme does the trick.

Correct.

Best of luck with this. If I remember correctly, you're heading for the UK. Things are pretty chaotic at airports here. You may be lucky or you may have to stand for a couple of hours waiting to clear passport and customs. Personally I would have a bag of diapers delivered to the hotel. Nappies r Us have a good selection - Betterdry and now also Barries. Megamax availability is sporadic. Allow 3 working days for delivery. Unless you're in the presidential suite, sharing a fairly confined space with one other is going to be near impossible without him finding out. I would consider carefully telling just your room mate, leaning into a medical explanation, and ask him to keep it to himself, not even telling his wife. If he is a good friend, he will respect your privacy. Wearing a pull-up while drinking is risky. Multiple trips to the toilet, which may be noticed by your mates, and if you are like me, the likelihood that leaks will occur before you get to the urinal. Cumulatively over the course of a boozy evening, you may end up a lot wetter than you think, with the prospect of a journey back to the hotel at the end. But perhaps your mates already know about your underwear and have never said anything. Have fun and best of luck.

Many thanks as ever for your forays into nappiology. As you say, this solution comes with a number of drawbacks, angry spouses, galloping nappy rash and eau de care home just for starters. Am I right to think the underpants were briefs? I'd imagine that boxers or anything with cloth protruding from your nappy would result in a fairly rapid transfer of pee to the tops of your legs. Personally I find that some, but not all, booster pads result in more even load distribution.

I was recently confronted with a dilemma. Currently we are allowed 3 bags of non-recyclable waste every 2 weeks, but to reduce the amount going to landfill, that is about to change to 3 bags every 3 weeks. I was hauling 3 very heavy bags out every 2 weeks, and my wife said my nappies would have to go into special semi-transparent yellow medical waste bags, left on the side of the road for all to see. I might as well walk around in just a nappy and a t-shirt, I thought. Then someone here said they compost the inner lining, and so I started experimenting a few weeks back. I only pee in my nappies, and it is really easy. Simple tear the nappy open, tip the soggy gel and paper mash into a bucket and then drop the contents into a composting bin where I break it up into small lumps using a metal hook. We are now down to one light bag every 2 weeks containing all of the plastic shells and other household waste. I'd imagine the shells could be recycled as well. Does anyone know? Anyway, yesterday I took out my first batch of composted nappy/garden waste, and it looks very good. No smell and no trace of nappy liner. With all that nitrogen, the garden should soon be the envy of the neighbourhood. And it only takes me less than 10 minutes every 2 days, and I am feeling very smug.

Thank you @novababy88. That was really good, and I hope we get to read a lot more stories from you.