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alwayslittle

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Everything posted by alwayslittle

  1. good topic! I actually was wearing a diaper the first time I orgasmed (awake)... I was a very late bloomer, and I never thought about masturbating. I remember being more turned on by diapers than girls or sex or anuthing like that. As a teenager I would buy goodnites, and wear them, and it would turn me on and after wetting them I would rub my front a little, but I never climaxed. I was 17 and a senior in highschool the first time I came, I was living at a friend's house, and I learned his younger sister who was about 14 or 15 wore diapers to bed. It had been a crazy discovery, and I was trying my best to ignore it. However one day I had the house to myself and I snooped around, I saw in her closet the pack of depends that were crinkly, I had wondered what brand it was hearing it crinkle on her before. Anyways, after snooping around I saw there was one of her wet diapers in the trash. I could not fight my impulses, so I grabbed it and went into the bathroom to put it on. I guess it was an accumilation of all kinds of things, for one it was much more like the diapers I remember wearing as a baby, it had tapes and was plastic backed, so that was much more exciting than the goodnites I'd worn before. Also since it was already wet and soggy that felt all the more better, I stroked the front a few times before I came. It kind of freaked me out, because it was so sudden, and for a second I thought I was peeing.
  2. I heard Trey Parker from South Park will play with Legos whenever he has a creative block... Makes me think that maybe there's something to unlocking the creative side when you can go into a space to use your imagination.
  3. So I've always had a shy bladder, and it seems to have gotten worse the older I've gotten. The reason I'm bringing it up now is I've worked on various ways to help me pee in public places, but I have a daddy who comes by from time to time and expects me to use my diaper in front of him. All my tricks to help me go normally don't work while in front of him, it's not a big deal, since I'll scamper off in the next room and go, but I'd love to be able to pee while he watches.
  4. my two faves are the ABU's peekabus, which I am currently wearing. But my favorite fave is the super dry kids, that's because it's the closest one to like what I used to wear when I was little.
  5. Season 2 episode 17- Dead Moon Walking Adventure Moon the youngest son goes to school wearing a diaper and bring his stuffed animal to prove a point to his "frenemy " Debbie that she doesn't have to be embarrassed for being scene as little.
  6. Great Topic to discuss, for me it's impossible for me to stay authentic into a particular age standard. I'd like to think of my little age as being a "Post-Baby", caught in between wanting to be babied and wanting to be grown-up, which was around the age of 5 for me. This is when I remember my first confusions of being both embarrassed & jealous of kids my age being diapered, and also the age which my earliest memories are the most consistent. It was also the same age when I had this onetime experience which developed into my most obsessive & favorite memory I kept to myself (you know how they say when you remember something, you're just "remembering a memory"?), well I feel I'd gone and tried remembering it so much during all these years, that I'm not even sure what parts are truth, fantasies, or dreams. This is why I had to develop a whole ABDL/Little sub-persona for myself, who's little age is 5, but get's the treaments I'd only fantasized about at that age, this way its more relatable & almost memorable. I developed an entire internal system with a name and back-story, in order to try and get into the idea of headspace that makes the most sense to me.
  7. It's Complicated is what it is, I've more or less summarized Ageplay into further separate categories for myself. Humiliation Ageplay (Sexual) Nurturing Ageplay (Sensual) They both cross over at times. There's no denying that there's I'm going to find levels of erotic arousals during ageplay, especially if there's a diaper change involved. Not to mention, even if you are able to fight off the eroticism, a diaper change is a very intimate experience being momentarily naked exposed.
  8. I remember I had the feeling of knowing something was there when I was around 5 or 6. I knew I was struggling with this cognitive disodiance at an early age for seeing kids my age (pre-school/kindergarten) diapered and being jealous, but also hated being babied (in a general sense, ie. Someone saying "quit acting like a baby".
  9. For me it was the classic depends, which I've always felt like was an embarrassing story. I was living with a friend in high-school, who's younger sister was a bedwetter and wore them at night. One day while I had the house to myself I'd rummaged around around her room looking for them. I couldn't find them, nor did I look to hard, feeling bad enough being so snoopy, but when I looked in the downstairs bathroom I'd found a used one in the trash. The best/worst part was that it was wet, which actually wasn't the first time I'd down that. When I was around 6 or 7, I found a used diaper on the porch of this girl my age who wore diapers, I'd scooped it up under my jacket and went behind some bushes to put it on, I remember I wore it all day even when I got home. Although when I was 15 I discovered a pack of goodnights in her spare-room closet (she used to run a daycare) and going through puberty, I like to count that as my first time "back in diapers" as an adult, I remember a lot of the ABDL websites had allowed Teen-babies to join.
  10. I used to frequently have diaper dreams, especially going through puberty...I don't have them as often, but every once and a while I'll have one. It's funny, because almost all of my diaper dreams were kind of frustrating; like I'd be wearing a diaper and have to use it, but never able to. Or the ones I'd have when I was younger, would be with some anonymous girl I'd be crushing on, and it'd eaither be one of two scenarios, of her asking me to diaper her (or vise-versa, her going to diaper me) but for whatever reason it'd never get around to happening.
  11. grandma put into one these Luv's one time, for some reason i was more embarassed over Barney than wearing a diaper
  12. I have always wanted to try it! I've been curious of the effects and if it would help me get into a better head space. I can't smoke like I'd like cause of federal job and UAs, but when I do get the chance to get stoned, I can feel this natural childlike curiosity which is difficult to tab into otherwise... I wish I had a partner as well, that would make for an even better time! not to mention, I think with a partner it could help a lot in finding that headspace... I'm originally from oregon as well!
  13. I started watching Starcrawler's new music video Bet My Brains" because they're an okay and interesting new band I've been following, when half way through the music video I notice the lead singer is wearing a pull-up!
  14. they happy to be my ultimate faves, it seems like they're always out!
  15. First of all, I hope this is the right place for this topic and I apologize if I may come off ignorant since I'm kind of new to this side of myself. I have been adamantly straight all my life, aside from the wondering we all go through by truly questioning our sexuality. However despite my sexual preferences I have been an ABDL every since I've discovered the community while in puberty, and of course like all the straight male ABDL's out there I've longed for the same general fantasy of sharing a real life experience with a female, (personally my dream role to meet was for a hot babysitter or next door neighbor girl). However I've come to realize in order to create a fantasy you might have to broaden the perimeters. I'm not saying they don't come true, but the odds are stacked against us, and at least speaking for myself, I'm way too much of an introvert in the persistence and dedication it takes to open up even an online friendship with any female ABDL. I'm sorry if this comes off biased, I'm speaking from experience and also tend to feel like there are a lot out there based on similar topics all throughout the forums. The good news for myself at least, is that I have learned to open my mind up a little bit, (I had to recondition some archaic traditions I'd been raised with). I guess I've always leaned into the submissive role erotically, and I started slowly allowing the role of a "daddy" enter my fantasy. At first I was unsure of how I felt about it, because even still I don't desire anything romantic or even sexual, it's extremely intimate and definitely sensual. Now after some online interactions and finally some actual success in finding others who love to play the "daddy" role, I've come to be entranced with the idea. There's no denying that plays to my natural submissive side already, but I think the real "turn-on" is becoming an object of desire. It's a strange discovery of myself I would of never expected, and it's now almost exclusively the desired preference of my ABDL fantasy.
  16. I've had the fortune (and sometimes not-so-fortune) of moving around a lot which has now ended up with me landing in San Antonio. It seems like the scene is the biggest in DFW and Houston (obviously bigger cities), but I'm coming from El Paso and surprisingly there was a nice little active scene going on there. Feel free to message me if you have any information you'd like to share.
  17. thank you for sharing this, I love Blonde Redhead!
  18. I had two incidents when I was put back into diapers. The first wasn't so much a punishment, but it was embarassing. I was 5yo and staying the night at my grandma's and since my cousin was there as well and a bedweetter she had figured it would of just been easier to diaper us both for the night. I remember fighting with her about it, since I had never wet the bed ever, but it was also exciting, and after she put the diaper on I couldn't get my mind off of it for the entire night. Since it was a routine for my cousin he was enjoying the company of not being singled out. In the morning he even told our grandma the next morning we wanted to continue wearing them and even wet them, unfortunately she wouldn't change us into a fresh one (I think she was too cheap) so if we decided to use them we had to change back into our underware. She was completely ok with us wetting them, which we both did and wore knowing we werent gonna get changed all the way until lunch. The second time when I was 6yo and my mom was dating this douchebag, he was awful and abusive in so many ways (no need to get anymore into that), but one of his threats to me when I would cry was to put me into one of my little brother's diapers. Eventually he made true to his threat while I had been whining, and said "if your gonna act like a baby I will treat you like a baby." I think by this time I knew I had been attracted to the idea, but in this situation it was nothing but humilation, which he had me strip in front of him and put on the diaper myself. Afterwards I had to sit on the stairs in his view while in timeout with only a t-shirt and a diaper. This lasted for 15mins of me bawling, and finally he let me take it off and change back into my big-boy clothes...
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