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runaway

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Bedwetter

Bedwetter (4/7)

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  1. If it will make you happy ... IM me on yahoo sn peekiee_stream or on msn peekiee1@gmail.com this Wednesday (Jun 4th) about 9pm (eastern US time). I will have the cam on so just view ... it is open to all. I'm gonna need some diaper support for what I will be doing anyway... so figured why not show off for those that will appreciate it. That goes for anyone else that wants to watch ... no permission required, so don't ask me just go view. I'll post a reminder in a few places cuz I know how forgetable I am and how other things can swipe the memory. cheers!
  2. For me, it has to do with the cute design on the front. We can't help that the manufacturer decided to make the length short. It doesn't matter much about the size. There is usually only an inch or so difference in the lengths ... they only vary the widths as the size goes up on some of them. If I see something I really like, and it happens to be a bit short ... tugging on it can sometimes stretch it temporarily, lol ... at least that is what I like to tell myself. Who can pass up a great logo or pic? I draw the line at women's dress shoes. I will never wear them again, no matter what I've been bribed. A small inconvenient shirt sacrafice for the cute image is one thing, but uncomfortable shoes will never sit in my closet. We all have our 'things' that someone else may roll their eyes at diaper boy... get over it.
  3. Rejection or certainty, it doesn’t matter. I’m not self-loathing; it is an uncontrollable internal restraint that keeps me from acting. It is the same kind of oddity that keeps me from being able to talk sometimes … no matter how much I want to, it just won’t come out. It can happen in normal conversation … I’m asked a personal question (this is usually the case) and my ability to speak temporarily disappears. My ability to act upon my attractions … same thing; I can’t do it. I don’t fear rejection … I probably fear acceptance. I’ve learned that I’m not attracted to any woman that is attracted to me first. I’ve not led a completely solitary existence, but given my past experiences and current views … I’m certain my mind-bondage prevents any real intimacy entering my bed; and I’m not into casual, meaningless sex. I didn’t post this for advice. I posted because many men think women have it easy when it comes to “finding someone” just because we’re women. I’m not really looking … but you know what I mean. I’m not unattractive and could hook up with someone, but I don’t want ‘just someone’. I want for my inhibitions to fade … I want to be the dominant one … I want to be respected and even feared at times. I want love. But love … mutual love … I’ve never experienced it. Some have proclaimed to love me (I’ll never know if it was true) … but I am not sure I’m capable of loving anyone … another facet of the mind-bondage impasse. Blah, Blah … ok, this thread is closed. Posted as is for those that can relate … doesn’t help anyone really, but just something I’d thought I’d share with those who think the ass is cleaner on the other side.
  4. I’m in my own personal bondage hell … bondage of the mind. Almost my entire existence is trapped inside my head unable to be physically expressed. That is the way it will stay forever. I’ll never be able to act upon any of my true sexual desires; my deep-seeded fantasies. I see a woman I’m instantly attracted to and smile; give her a once over, twice over with my eyes, and pass her by without even thinking about approaching her. My mind screams, longing to dip my tongue into her and make her moan; to make ligature marks on her wrists, arms, thighs as she struggles … fighting herself to experience all of the pain and pleasure in the same space as I devour all of her pulsing folds. No … I’m bound by my own impotence. My impulse to focus my attention in her direction decays exponentially the more I want her. The quicker I cut off awareness to the connection I feel between my legs and hers, heightens my weakness. I instantly know … when my lungs hitch, when my eyes quickly cast away in the opposite direction, when I need to flee from the spot I’m standing … I know there is one more chain wrapped around the trunk that contains the part of me that can never ever be free.
  5. I love capturing images of the places I travel too ... here are a few from my most recent trip >> Ireland.
  6. Wow, that was a really great post! Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I enjoyed reading that.
  7. It has changed a lot for me. I never ever thought I’d grow out of feeling like a little girl in my head … so I didn’t even entertain the idea of “getting rid” of it. I didn’t think it was changeable. Now that I don’t feel like that same little girl anymore it really is a huge relief. I didn’t know how much of a burden it was until it faded. I have to say, ignorance really is bliss, cuz if I HAD known what it felt like to NOT feel little I would have been so much more depressed for missing out on so much! I really wish I could adequately describe the difference between feeling like a little girl and feeling like a grown up. You’d think it would be a simple explanation … but it really isn’t. I used to believe seeing the world through the eyes of a child was pretty good, but now that I see it through the eyes of a grown-up it is so much more amazing, more unbelievable … just more. At first, when I started feeling different, I thought maybe it was college that sparked the change … but I really don’t think I can hold education responsible for my internal amendments, since I graduated 3 years ago … and I didn’t really start feeling more grown up till last year. No, I don’t think ab’s or lg’s are uneducated, so I mean no offence by that comment. I only speak for myself and my own reasons. My reasoning is mine alone … not projected upon anyone else’s situations. So don’t internalize what I’ve written and apply it to yourself. That’s like trying to incorporate an SL avatar into your real life body … it just wouldn’t work very well (yeah, that is a good testament to how alien I feel sometimes … but that’s a whole other issue). Yes, I would be upset if I started feeling little again. I have fun remembering and fooling around with some lg dialogue, but I don't ever want to feel like an lg ever again.
  8. As I said, if u are not interested just ignore it; u have ur mindset and I have mine. Those that don’t care about the environment or cleaner energy sources, fine … diesel it up for all I care. I have no interest in dictating anyone’s actions. I was only speaking to the ones that do care and was having fun with my new-found Mommy spirit. As for my fictional yarns of folly … yeah I do have problems completing them. I apologize for the teasing of a drawn out idea and leaving cliff hangers all over the place; although, I’m always glad to hear people like them. But, since my story site is free for all to view, you’ll have ta accept my irregular bursts of creativity. My fingers are fluidly typing for a few months, then the creek dries up and my focus takes a turn around the prairie. Besides, u don’t want me to finish out a story when I’m not gassed up on inspiration … it won’t be as good as a tale that has a while to simmer like a nice thick stew. I’ve not had any stewish stories so far, but do aspire to one day turn out a really great one (or three). Thanks for asking though babydyke! (lets me know I’m not sharing them with only my invisible friends.) Plus, with that little-girl inside me fading and the grown-up in me getting louder, my writing style has changed slightly. I always had problems developing the Mommy-role figures because I couldn’t get into their mind and figure out their motivations ... I just had to guess and wrote things the sub-charcters wanted to hear. Now, I think I am having some progress! It is exciting … but also frustrating, because when I look back at some of the dialogue I cringe because now I’m like, “Noooo she would never have said that!! What was I thinking?!” lol
  9. Words of wisdom from a redneck diaper boy ... thanks for your input. I'm glad someone out there is conserving their brain cells for something other than education. Good for you! I always love those that recycle intelligence for more useful things.
  10. lol, yeah knuxie u did good... ya'll are funny. Here ya go ... 2 old vids, but ya gotta register 18+ before u can view em; u register an email and username and then u have ta verify the email and set up your profile. Sorry if thats a lot of work just ta view 2 small vids ... and wouldn't blame u if u didn't wanna go through the trouble. http://www.acidplanet.com/artist.asp?video...7435&T=7036
  11. Since discovering my interest in becoming an ab/lg Mommy, I’ve been reading up on some parenting tips that I’d like to practice using on you to see how well my Mommy skills are developing … 1. Connect before you direct; eye-to-eye contact to get their attention. Ok ya’ll I need your eyes and ears please. 2. Stay brief & simple Today (March 29th) we are playing a game called Earth Hour. Tonight at 8pm we are turning off the lights for 1 hour to help the Earth rest. 3. Ask your child to repeat the request back to you So, what are we ALL doing tonight at 8pm? 4. Make an offer the child can't refuse. If we all play this game together nicely, and I mean ALL of us … I will repost 2 vid stories that I made last year for you ta watch. It is of me (a 10 yr time span) when I was an adult-little-girl in diapers like a lot of you (before I became all grown up). 5. Be positive It will be fun! You can even use a flashlight if you want. 6. Begin your directives with "I want." I want you all to behave and have fun. 7. Incorporate the legs first, mouth second method. ((Not sure how ta do this online… but thought it was a really good tip that the other caregivers would like to read.)) 8. Give choices You can pick which hour to turn your lights 8pm or 9pm … but it needs ta be a time you are normally home and when you normally have the lights on. If you didn't get this message in time for March 29th, you can play this game the day you read it 9. Speak socially correctly; even a two-year-old can learn "please." Expect your child to be polite. Children shouldn't feel manners are optional. Speak to your children the way you want them to speak to you. Please make sure you keep safe when those lights are off … no candles for you little ones … only flashlight ok? 10. Put up written reminders. ((posts this note up on the board for all ta see)) 11. Close the discussion Ok ya’ll, hope you have a great Saturday! Please get those lights out for an hour tonight, and you can enjoy 2 short adult-little-girl videos. If you don’t want to participate, it would be great if you could just be silent about the subject and not ruin it for the others. XX Hugz XX ((so, how'd I do?))
  12. Thanks Chris and CDL for taking the time to read my thoughts and giving your input. Hey smarti ... well, I'm thinking that perhaps my idea of Domme (for u >>Dom) is two different species if u are boxing it in with harsh, domenering treatments. Or if u have visions of a black leather clad person with a whip and shackling the prisoner ... mmm ... ok as much as I kinda like some of that, lol... I only consider that a game ... a temporary playtime. The leather comes off and the shackles are unlocked and u go about everyday life after that. If I were to have it as a lifestyle, I think of it as having control over the details of most aspects of living ... she must be willing to accept I know what's best and be trusting enough to know I will always want her happy even if she may not be happy in a certain moment or didn't like a decision I made. She must also be comfortable enough to not feel rejected when I need to be alone. There's a lot more, but I don't want to ramble on .... As much as I'd like to have a relationship like that, where all she is responsible for is cooking, taking over the transportaiton (driving and picking me up, cuz I seriously hate driving) and being available for me to pleasure sexually ... I highly doubt that could last for a lifetime. I'm also not yet ready mentally, because I'm only at the start of this development. Maybe if I were ta meet someone at the start of her development into those things I'm looking for, we could grow into them together ... that would be ideal. Since I expect this process for me may take a long time, I'm not too worried about finding someone soon. I have some internal work ta do, and many experiences to be had before I can commit to any one person.
  13. GREAT! Well repaid, u do know now u will always have to refer to me as "my Queen" ... and when answering a question u must say "yes my Queen" or "no my Queen". My first demand is to tell how u liked them? Were they as u hoped? When I tried them I was a Huggies girl ... and after I tried them I was still a Huggies girl. If they had come out with a Huggies 7, I may have made Kimberly and Clark my Queens, even though they were men (actually men do make the best Queens).
  14. Ya’ll are very welcome … And … wow … that was the most sap over a few diapers I’ve seen in one place in … well, ever. You sure are easy ta please repaid! I’m now wondering what you would have done if I had overnighted it. If it includes a crown and making me your Queen … send it back and I’ll overnight it. I think shipping is the most fantastic deal in the whole world. For a few bucks I got 5 boxes across several hundred miles in just a few days going to 5 different places. I don’t think there could be any better deal than that, short of beaming it through email. Lookin forward ta seein those pics moogs & singner!
  15. Never say never heidilynn … I don’t see anything wrong with anyone’s turn-on’s … it is what it is. Being 18 yrs old, you are still very young and will develop a lot of different turn-on’s throughout your life. I used to be turned on by a certain type of guy when I was younger (16ish till 22ish) I was pretty bi around that time … but now it is only women that turn my head. I can't say I will never be attracted to another guy ever again, but it is very hard to feel as if I could. You have to force your mind to think rationally about this, rather than allowing your beliefs to be based on emotions alone. Time has a way of changing your attractions … and the way that happens is through different exposure to various things life has to offer. If you truly want to experience a new turn on, all you have to do live life and time will take care of your wishes. I’m not saying every desire can be fulfilled (especially the ones some people have with wanting to change their body back to being a kid) … but this need to change sexual turn-on’s is very fluid (moldable), but only if you experiment with different things. Not for a day or a week, because these things are not like fast food. It is more like seeds of experience, and some of them will grow and some won’t. After 10 years of being an lg, I now no longer have any desire to wear diapers or pull-ups or anything related to it. I’m not sorry about my past attractions, but now I just have different ones … and it is all because of time … I’ve grown past it.
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