About 4 years ago I ended up going out on a sort of date with a co worker. We had worked together for a couple of years and liked each other so we arranged to go out and see what happened. On the romance front I bottled it as I'm very shy and she is devestatingly pretty. But while we were out I wanted to get a sounding of her thoughts on this fetish so I asked her what the most daring thing she had done sexually. After she had finished she asked me about mine and then wrestled out of me (I get very embarrassed just saying the word 'nappy') that a girl I was once with had asked me to dress her up as a baby. My date asked if I had done it, if she had wanted to wear nappies and what I thought. I basically stated that I had thought it weird but was cool with it and had checked on the Internet about what it was. She stated that it did sound weird and would've been worried it involved kids but I said that it was just role play and had nothing to do with children. Anyway I was trying to get a handle on what she might think of my fetish without letting her know, a white lie and maybe just see if we could go out. I do feel like a part of me was vetting her to go out with which felt unfair since she was, and is, a very nice person. Anyway like I said it didn't go anywhere as a relationship due to me.
I then met someone else who I had a whirlwind romance with and proposed to. i told my fiancee about my fetish straigt away and she accepted it and has worn for me. And my co worker friend became just that again.
Fast forward to last year and I started to notice my work friend paying me a lot more attention and flirting with me. She has even cracked a few jokes regarding nappies with me.
This has led to me fantasising about her a lot in relation to my fetish which makes me feel guilty as I have a very loving partner who I do love very much. At points I've daydreamed of proposing to meet up with my co worker but I know, deep down, that it is a fantasy but one that is very difficult to get out of my mind. I also think that since this happened things between me and my fiancée have been strained (we don't have an easy relationship but we like soulmates) which thus drives me to this even more.
I think I just wanted to tell someone as the combination of the above makes it impossible to talk to anyone I know. I would just like to say that haven't ever cheated on someone I've gone out with and wouldn't on my partner.
Confession over.