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I have an ongoing fantasy about children being forced to wear diapers because of federally mandated testing under the “No Child Left Behind Act of 2001.” The synopsis goes like this: Because of the school system endeavoring to show progress under the act to avoid losing funding, they do anything they can to make the test scores higher. This might involve having the kids take “practice tests” similar to the ones that will determine the score the schools will receive. The children will be encouraged to be at their best mentally and physically by eating a good breakfast and getting plenty of sleep. Why not also encourage the kids to wear diapers so they won’t be distracted by bodily functions? We could only imagine the embarrassment (or not) of children being told they will have to wear diapers, their parents struggling to get them into diapers, the school officials enforcing the diaper rule, and the children themselves coping with the actual wearing of the diapers.

I laughed out loud when I first heard the present administration’s answer to poor education in the country. The current educational system was born of the factory model of the 1940’s stamping out neat packages of identically educated young people. This system is not as effective as it once was. Instead of addressing that issue, the answer was determined simply to be “more testing.” Yes, that will work very well. We all appreciate more tests in our lives don’t we? It is not hard to guess the outcome. The school systems now concentrate on teaching what is necessary to make a good showing on the tests. Individualized education is out the window. Helping a child to reach his or her potential has been sidetracked. The idea of education to better one’s self has been replaced by standardization and fitting in to group norms, thus, its not too much of a stretch to imagine officials grasping at any straw they can. If making the kids wear diapers can improve test scores, then that's what they will do.

Added to this is the conception of zero tolerance. Everybody must conform or be out. One mistake and that’s it. A girl was recently expelled from school for having two aspirin in her purse. A boy was suspended for having a butter knife in his truck. A mentally challenged girl was arrested for wetting her pants at school. A 10 year old girl was removed from school for saying she wanted to kill her teacher because the teacher wouldn’t let the girl go to the bathroom and she had an accident in class. A seven-year-old boy was handcuffed at school. Several children have been subdued by tazer. There is very little room for individualism.

I have written two brief pieces about this fantasy. The first is a letter to parents informing them that their child will need diapers for testing day. The other is a short news clipping about a school district that enforces diaper wearing for these tests.

What I really hope to do someday is write a piece from the child’s perspective about wearing protection along with everyone else in their class.

-D R

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  • 3 weeks later...

The Letter

Copyright © 2007, D Rainger

Joseph D. Campbell

Administrator, Sunny Vail School District

Trenton, Tennessee

Dear Parent or Guardian,

During the week of June 6th, Sunny Vail School District will be administering Schedule 4 competency exams to all 5th grade students. It is very important that all students enrolled be present for testing. Because of the impact test scores have upon local funding we would like to make some practical suggestions to help prepare your student for testing:

1. Please make sure the student has adequate rest. The district nurse recommends 8 to 9 hours of sleep each night.

2. Proper nutrition is essential for mental acuity. See that the student has a balanced breakfast before arriving at school. Cereal (hot or cold), toast, juice, and milk provide good nutrition.

3. The student will need 6 no. 2 pencils. Notebooks, pens, calculators, backpacks, or other personal property will not be permitted in the testing area.

4. Students should bathe or shower before school and wear clean clothes each day.

5. Provide the student with a supply of absorbent undergarments (such as pull-ups or bedwetter pants). Breaks for bathroom or any other reason will not be permitted during testing.

It is our hope that performance on the Schedule 4 exams will exceed previous competency levels. This will ensure that our district can continue to provide the educational quality our children deserve. We appreciate your help in reaching this very important goal.

Sincerely,

Joseph D. Campbell

Administrator

JDC:dr

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Diapers May Improve Test Scores

(This is a work of fiction)

Copyright © 2005 - D Rainger

Rolling Fields, Pa –

In an effort to improve performance of district schools in the

upcoming exams mandated by President Bush's "No child left behind initiative," the school

board here has sent home letters to the parents of third graders suggesting that they

provide their children with absorbent "pull-up" underpants on the day of the testing.

Officials are reasoning that the students will be more comfortable sitting for long periods

of time without breaks and will be more attentive and thus perform better on the tests.

Some parents are outraged at the board suggesting that the children wear "diapers." Moland

Ross, a local contractor says his son will not be among those wearing the protective

undergarments. Ross said he has to "draw the line somewhere," and that his child "is not

a baby who goes in his pants." Proponents say that it is a good idea and could potentially

stop embarrasment and even teasing if a child has an accident during the examinations.

Tammy Greggs, a third grader from Rolling Fields says she is not looking forward to wearing

pull-ups, but says "it won't be so bad if you know everyone else is."

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  • 1 month later...

Dear Editor,

I feel I must write this letter. My wife and I are parents in the Elk Grove School system here in the tri-county area. Several months ago we received a letter from the school district informing us that our 11-year-old daughter would be participating in the Federally mandated testing for sixth-graders. Much to our surprise it suggested that we provide our daughter with "protective underpants" during the test. The reasoning was that the children would be apt to preform better if they were not distracted by their need to use the restroom during the long examination periods. My wife and I were skeptical, but certainly wanted to comply with the district's recommendations.

We bought the necessary supplies and informed our daughter of our decision to have her use the underpants that week. The reaction was swift and intense. We have always had a good relationship with our daughter and now it was most definitely in jeopardy. We reasoned with her at length and finally resorted to a bribe to get her to wear one of the garments the next morning.

Our daughter has always been fastidious about her cleanliness and bodily functions. She does not like to use the facilities at school and often times will make a dash for the bathroom when she comes home in the afternoon. All was well the first two days of testing. Our daughter returned home without having to make use of the absorbent underpants. The third day was different, however, and has proved to be a turning point in the mental health of our otherwise normal and delightful girl.

Our daughter related to us tearfully how she had "an accident" and had urinated in her protective undergarment. It must have been devastating for her. She was visibly shaken and pale when she told us about having to go into the lavatory to "change herself." She was clingy and tearful all evening, and we had to spend time consoling her repeatedly.

I would have dismissed the misfortune as of passing importance except for the change we noted in her behaviour. That very night she wet her bed. Our daughter has been dry since she was three and a half. She has never had a nighttime accident. This was a tremendous blow to her ego. She felt mortified. She hyperventilated and could not be calmed down until we suggested that she wear the disposable underpants "just in case." This seemed to calm her and we were able to get her back to sleep.

From that time on, things have gone steadily downhill. She has continued to wet the bed. She has become preoccupied with the notion that she will accidentally urinate in the daytime even though she has always been able to hold herself exceptionally well. There is no physical basis for her anxiety. We can only conclude that it has been born from her experience at school. Within days the first package of protective underpants was used up. We discovered that our daughter had been wearing them to school and wetting them. She begged us to buy more. She was almost in hysterics. We bought her toddler "pull-ups" in an attempt to encourage her to be a "big girl," and even baby diapers thinking she would be embarrassed to wear them, but it has made no difference. She says she "feels safe" when she wears the pull-ups and "gets scared" if she doesn't have them on. She has regressed to the point of wearing diapers exclusively and no longer even puts on pants when she is at home but walks around in pull-ups. No amount of discussion, reward, or punishment has made any impression on her. She is now in therapy, and the psychologist offers only guarded hope.

Please publish this letter as a warning for other parents. Our beautiful daughter has been scarred by the district's policy. I can't help wondering if there are ulterior motives when the school will compromise the dignity and mental balance of its students for the sake of test scores.

Yours truly,

(Name withheld)

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  • 3 weeks later...

WTF? Not allowing bathroom breaks is equal to child abuse!

Our public school system is America is a joke! They have lowered the standards to make themselves look good.

If I could, I would home school my remaining children. The school system is drowning in a sea of political correctness. I can't stand it!

I have an ongoing fantasy about children being forced to wear diapers because of federally mandated testing under the “No Child Left Behind Act of 2001.
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WTF? Not allowing bathroom breaks is equal to child abuse!

Our public school system is America is a joke! They have lowered the standards to make themselves look good.

If I could, I would home school my remaining children. The school system is drowning in a sea of political correctness. I can't stand it!

Check out

Child Advocate.org

-D R

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  • 2 weeks later...

Dear Parents,

As you know last month your child took the Schedule 4 exams. Attached to this letter are your child's scores.

The score results are broken down by subject and into four score ranges: outstanding, acceptable, at risk, and

unacceptable. We are happy to say that our students received 70% acceptable or outstanding scores across the board.

Starting February 3, we will hold weekly remediation classes after school. A different subject will be covered each day.

Mondays will be for English, Tuesdays for Mathematics, Wednesdays for Science, and Thursday for Social Studies.

All students who scored unacceptable in the given subject area MUST attend that class. At the parents option,

students who received an "at risk" score may also attend.

Classes will start 5 minutes after the normal dismissal bell and run for one hour. As there is limited instructional time

available, requests to use the lavatory will not be honored. Students attending remediation should wear absorbant

garments as they did for the testing. Due to the short time between dismissal and class starting and the lack of changing facilities, we recommend students wear the garments for the entire day when they have remediation that afternoon.

With your assistance we are looking forward to 100% acceptable or better performance on the retests in June.

Jos. Campbell

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Hi willnotwill,

Thanks for playing along.

I'm reading a book right now titled "America's 'Failing' Schools," by W. James Popham. It's tag line is: "How Parents and Teachers Can Cope With 'No Child Left Behind.'" It is both interesting and aggravating because of the stupidity. No mention of diapers yet. Ha! Ha!

I appreciate your contribution.

-D R

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 3 weeks later...

Dear Parents,

As you know the schedule 4 exams are rapidly approaching. The remediation classes ran

successfully and we're looking forward to a high level of performance by the students on

the exam.

As before, I wish to reiterate that in addition to the academic preparation, that the students

be physically prepared for the exam. Please make sure your child gets adequate sleep in

the days leading up to the test and that he eats a healthy breakfast the morning of the

testing days.

As you may have heard in the news, there were some incidents of cheating and other testing

improprieties during the fall testing. While none of these involved students at our school,

the state education department has mandated changes to insure the integrity of the exams.

As a result the following procedures will be instituted for the upcoming tests:

1. On testing days, students when arriving at school shall place all their belongings in their

locker. No pens, pencils, or calculators will be permitted to be brought into the testing

rooms. All the necessary supplies will be provided by the proctors.

2. Students shall disrobe completely and place all clothes (including underwear) in their

locker. We ask that students not wear watches or jewelry to school, but if they do this

shall also be placed in the lockers.

3. Students shall report to their designated testing rooms. After making sure the student

is not bearing anything that could compromise the testing process, the student shall be

issued a protective brief (diaper) to be work and if necessary used during the session.

4. At the end of the testing sessions student shall proceed to the designated changing

area and remove the brief. Antiseptic wipes will be provided. The diapers and wipes

shall be placed in the designated waste containers.

Students will not be admitted to the afternoon session wearing the brief from the morning

session, even if unused. It should be removed and placed in the waste container before

reporting to the testing room.

I wish to thank you for your cooperation and with your help and our students' hard work

I am sure we can have a successful and orderly testing.

Joseph Campbell

School Administrator

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  • 1 month later...

It's the end of the school year, and I'm looking forward to the summer. School is so dumb and this year has been the worst with this No Child Left Behind testing, special classes, and for pete's sake, diapers. Now to top it off, not only do I face three days of testing, I'm going to have to strip down and wear a diaper for them.

Monday morning rolls around and I'm off to school. I go to my locker and open it and just stand there. Strip down? Gee, it's not like I don't do it in gym class...why should this bother me. I kick my shoes into the locker, and start removing things. I'm just about finished when my friend Jim jumps next to me.

"Is this great!" he shouts, "I wish we could go naked at school all the time."

"Er, I guess" I responded not looking too sure.

"Gotta go," he said, "Besides, there's the girls." He pointed beyond me.

Crystal, the girl who had the locker next to mine had just opened her locker. She was wearing sweats and flip flops. She pulled off the sweatshirt revealing two firm breasts, no bra. She pulled off the sweatpants showing she wore no panties either. She turned to me and said "Normally I wear underwear, but I figured there was no point today."

She hung her pants up and her eyes drifted down to my penis which was rapidly becoming quite erect.

"Is that happening because you're looking at my body?"

"Yeah", I said a little embarrassed.

"I think it's cute. We better get to the test room."

I headed down the hall. My first exam was math and the halls were full of naked students. Some where acting as if nothing unusual was happening, some were embarrassed. But there were certainly a lot to see. I got to my room and waited in line to get in. The teacher gave my arms a quick check to make sure I had nothing written on them, I guess. She handed me two pencils and a diaper. I went to a desk and slipped on the diaper, at least partially covered now I started to relax, of course that cover was a diaper that I might have to use in the next few hours. While I still could I snuck views of the naked girls in the room. Even with their diapers on their were plenty of tits to check out.

Soon the teacher started handing out the test papers and I had to concentrate. An hour into the exam my bladder started to ache....could I hold it until the end of the session. It started to get distracting, and I did want to do well on the test, so I stopped, closed my eyes for a second and let go. The warmth flooded down my front through my crotch and slighly up my backside. Back to work.

"Pencils down, hand your papers up." the teacher eventually said. By now the warmth had gone a way, while I didn't feel really wet due to the absorbency of the diaper, I did feel it. We were dismissed and I headed out. Out in the hall I ran into Crystal. She looked at my wet diaper and said "I see you had to use it."

"Yeah." I said.

"Me too, make a note to not eat such a big breakfast tomorrow. I'm going to go change."

She turned and headed away and staring at her but I could see the dark brown. She'd had to do more than wet. I shuddered to think about that. Having to sit in a pile of your own crap during the exam didn't thrill me, but I could be in that boat. I headed into the boys room. I peeled the diaper off and put it in the special large trash can they added for this. I grabbed a few wipes and gave my privates the once over and headed off to lunch.

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Thanks willnotwill,

I like your idea. It hadn't occured to me to have any scat in a story, but it works well. The mental picture of the kids nude at their lockers is a good one too. "Really Fast Times at Ridgemont High?" Your piece was well thought out and and had some pretty good literary elements in it. What's next?

-D_Rainger

P.S. I'm working on a story where a child has no knowledge of the testing requirement and discovers a package of diapers in her dresser drawer.

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January 20th 2010,

I wish I was with them. entombed in endless sleep across the street in hallowed ground. I wonder why test scores were worth all this gore? Teenagers both boy and girl a like were naked in the halls...Do you know what happens to one naked boy or girl in a crowded naked hall? You end up with one girl pinned in a corner where know one can see her. Her clothes forced off her. Her Two arms held with the right hand of the Janitor and her mouth closed shut with his left as she screams in vain for help to escape her pain. Pain explodes all around her bursting open the gates of her safe reality and flooding it with terror. She lies there twisted and mangled trying to put herself back together. She stairs out every window wishing she had the courage to escape the pain. She seeks councilor's guidance but is called a lair. Every faculty member knows she is not a lair but they cannot show the rules cause students to die. You see the girl's body splattered all over the front steps to the school.

A boy named Choe felt low. pressures of dignity and scholarships pounded his head. Diapers devastated his dignity. While non stop testing sharpened his mind to the tip of no return. The pressure snapped his mind and in time he stopped time. He rolled into school making head splattered smoothies with his uncle's oozy.

I wish I could have known. I wish I could have stopped this whole mess. I'm in so much stress. I might wake up and pop and get someone shot. These tests are just stressed designed to press us to best, so they sya. But How many tests do you have to pass to save two lives?

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  • 2 weeks later...

The following is a true report from The Columbus Dispatch:

Child denied bathroom during test

Friday, May 4, 2007 3:31 AM

MAGNOLIA, Ohio (AP) -- A sixth-grader was denied permission to use the bathroom during state testing this week and had an accident, an unfortunate outcome of a decision based in part on the need to maintain the integrity of the test, the superintendent said.

"If this happened last week or next week would this be handled differently?" asked David Janofa, superintendent of Sandy Valley Local Schools. "The answer is, 'Yes.' "

The northeastern Ohio school district is evaluating its policy to try to prevent another student from being embarrassed in the future.

"We know these tests are important, but in that process, we can't lose the importance of kids," Janofa said.

Student scores on the achievement tests help determine school rankings on the state's annual report cards, creating "a heightened level of anxiety" for those taking and administering the tests, Janofa said.

J.C. Benton, spokesman for the Ohio Department of Education, said bathroom breaks are permitted during the testing. The state recommends having an adult supervisor -- but not the teacher administering the test -- escort students to and from the bathroom to make sure they aren't looking at their books or notes.

"We want to maintain the integrity and security of all tests, but not at the expense of a student having an accident in a classroom," Benton said. "Educators need to use common sense."

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  • 1 month later...

Along the same line of thought here is another short by a "Charlie22" titled the Evolving Diaper Revolution about how kids, through the fault of their parents lack of attention, end up going to school before they are trained. Eventually difficulties in beginning training later in life cause many students to draguate HS while incontinent. I wonder if you've read it and if it might fit in with the work being posted here.

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I spent my grammar school years in a private school. They were very strict.

I remember a small frail girl having to frequent the restroom. My 4th grade theacher thought she was going to teach the girl a lesson by not permitting her to go.

To make a long story short the above mentioned student had to be hospitalized. The school faced civil litigation. I remember my father discussing it with my mom. Notes went out, to parents, advising that here had been a change in rest room policy.

This happened 40 years ago. Immagine what the case would be now.

The following is a true report from The Columbus Dispatch:

Child denied bathroom during test

Friday, May 4, 2007 3:31 AM

MAGNOLIA, Ohio (AP) -- A sixth-grader was denied permission to use the bathroom during state testing this week and had an accident, an unfortunate outcome of a decision based in part on the need to maintain the integrity of the test, the superintendent said.

"If this happened last week or next week would this be handled differently?" asked David Janofa, superintendent of Sandy Valley Local Schools. "The answer is, 'Yes.' "

The northeastern Ohio school district is evaluating its policy to try to prevent another student from being embarrassed in the future.

"We know these tests are important, but in that process, we can't lose the importance of kids," Janofa said.

Student scores on the achievement tests help determine school rankings on the state's annual report cards, creating "a heightened level of anxiety" for those taking and administering the tests, Janofa said.

J.C. Benton, spokesman for the Ohio Department of Education, said bathroom breaks are permitted during the testing. The state recommends having an adult supervisor -- but not the teacher administering the test -- escort students to and from the bathroom to make sure they aren't looking at their books or notes.

"We want to maintain the integrity and security of all tests, but not at the expense of a student having an accident in a classroom," Benton said. "Educators need to use common sense."

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  • 6 months later...

(The following is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real persons or events is purely coincidental, although the putative author is being quite silly)

Subject: Diapers during testing

Dear Editor

My childs performance on the Schedule 4 exams this year was seriously undermined by having to wear school-issued diapers during the exam. The problem is that we normally send him to major exams wearing diapers, but the ones he was forced to use from school were nowhere near as good as the ones he normally uses, with embarrasing results. This was in addition to being made quite nervous before the test from the embarrassment of having to don a diaper at school and be checked for it, things he normally does at home in private.

Why do these things have to be done at school, rather than at home?

Sincerely,

The Silly Pickle

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Dear Mr. Redneck,

Thank you for the enclosed article and account of your childhood. As a school

administrator I am ultimately concerned with the well being of the students.

I understand the issues of students being denied the restroom and being

forced to hold it, but I am also responsible for maintaining the integrity

of the classes and exams.

We feel that having the students wear diapers during the sensitive times

provides the best solution. Disruptions are minimized and cheating is

eliminated. While students may experience small discomfort using the

diapers, it is better than the alternatives.

Thank you for your comments.

Joseph Campbell.

Dear Ms. Pickle,

Thank you for the comments. We take these suggestions seriously. As you

know this last test date was the first where we provided the diapers rather than

requiring the parents to send them in with the students. We understand that

there were some problems with the ones we had obtained and we are looking

to improve the quality of the diapers in the future.

At this time, we still do not feel it practical to allow students to bring any of

their own materials into the testing rooms. We hope you understand that

these tests are a very serious affair for both the students and the school and

we need to stem any irregularities such has happened in the past. We're

hoping that as this practice becomes more common, the embarrassment of

disrobing during the exams will be abated.

We thank you as being one of the parents who has been proactive in having

your child diapered during exams beyond what we strictly require. You should

be happy to know that we are expanding our changing area. While in the past

due to the size, it has been limited to special education students, private changing

facilities will be available now for other students who are wearing diapers

either because of administrative rulings or whose parents elect to do so.

More information will be forthcoming later in the month.

Jos Campbell.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Dear Mr. Campbell,

I've met you personally several times, and lord knows you know who I am. I've spent many an hour behind your closed office door discussing what you perceive to be my disciplinary problems. I really don't understand what the big deal is. School is so boring, and it's not like I'm learning anything I haven't already learned six months ago. I know you are aware of just how much time I spend reading, not just school books but newspapers and magazines and many fiction and nonfiction books. I truly do love to read and learn things, but school is just so boring for me because I never learn anything new I haven't already read about.

Let me cut to the chase here, Mr. Campbell. I never expected that my being so smart would cause me to want to take out revenge. This whole testing idea, and the methods with which it was carried out, made me want to puke. I didn't, but I did the next best thing. After putting on your stupid diaper, after getting all of my preparations ready for the test, I spent the entire test deliberately answering every single question wrong. You can check my scores yourself, Mr. Campbell. I scored an absolute zero on this test. I didn't want to pass it, so I didn't.

Since you've decided that smart kids like me are going to be treated like kids who have nightmares over these tests, why don't you take the 100% correct score I could have gotten if I'd bothered to try and give it to another student who really needs it?

I'd send you my soiled diaper with this letter, but I'm afraid that if I did, somebody at the postal service would get suspicious about the smell. Nonetheless, I think as highly of this whole process as I do of the soiled diaper. The whole thing stinks!

If there is a next time, I intend to wear a diaper for 24 hours before the test, and I also intend to refuse to change. I hope that my stinky smell will disrupt the other students sufficiently that they will fail the test too. I'll fail on purpose. They will fail because the system really smells.

Sincerely,

Brent Smithers

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Dear Mr. and Mrs. Smithers,

I write to you about your son Brent. Based on his very poor showing on the recent standardized tests and

his general defiant behavior of late, it is my recommendation that we alter his placement into a special

education class for learning and emotionally disabled students. I look forward to meeting with you to

set up Brent's individualized education plan. However, to give you a heads up, be advised that are LD/ED

students are expected to be diapered through out the day. Please make sure Brent arrives at school

diapered from now on.

J. Campbell, Assistant Principal.

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Dear Mr. Campbell,

My husband and I are in receipt of your letter sent to us about our son Brent. Both of us are extraordinarily puzzled. We've known since our child was very young that he is extremely bright, and I must confess that pulling him away from a book, no matter what kind, is quite a challenge. He reads text books like I read novels, and he reads novels like I read a Post-It note. He doesn't just read them. He actively studies them.

My husband and I really want our son to succeed in school, and we are not entirely convinced that he needs special placement of the variety you are describing in this letter to us. True, our son has picked up a very nasty attitude lately about school. He hasn't been able to express to us exactly what that is about, but I can only imagine it has something to do with the standardized tests you are referring to. Like all other parents in the school district, we did receive all of the preliminary notices and we shared with Brent what we thought would be relevent for him to understand. He did not take the news well. In fact, he's been quite poorly behaved ever since.

My husband and I are prepared to sit down and discuss these matters with you. In discussions with my husband, we've agreed that this might not be the best school district for him because we are afraid the district will be unable to meet his educational and intellectual needs. Nonetheless, his attitude has been very poor lately, and perhaps it is time we take some corrective action ourselves.

Diapers might very well do the trick, and if my mother were still alive, I'm sure she'd tell me that all my son needs is a good spanking. I never believed in spanking, especially not for Brent because he is such a precocious boy, but something must be done to adjust his attitude. I must further consult with my husband on this, but if you have any additional suggestions aside from the special placement which you have already suggested, something which neither my husband nor myself think would be a good placement for our son, please let us know.

Are you available to meet at 12:30PM on Tuesday afternoons? My husband and I both work 9 to 5 jobs, and that will give us each time to grab some quick lunch before meeting with you. I do not think it would be wise to bring Brent to this meeting, but I will ask for his input if he has any to give. If there is to be a meeting after this, perhaps he will come along for that. For now, though, I think it would be wise to discuss these matters as much out of his earshot as possible. He is hurting badly enough as is.

Sincerely,

Heather Smithers

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American Schools don't let you use the bathroom? Wow! I've never, ever been told no! And by law here, even *if* the teacher says no, I can't get into trouble by getting up and leaving, 'specially because I'm a girl.

If you're really sending these letters to someone, sorry to say it, but forcing your fantasies on others is sick.

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