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ABDLism =/= LGBT


Elfy

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People have probably seen me in a few topics complaining when people equate their ABDLism with LGBT people. I'm looking for the input of other people in the LGBT community, to see if I'm alone in my way of thinking here.

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I can kind of see where these people are coming from. Sexuality and fettishes are usually associated with each other, so I can imagine how these people might say "oh, ABDLs are misunderstood, the LGBTQ+ community is misunderstood. Therefore, since the LGBTQ+ community is fighting for rights, maybe we should too." So. I see the (flawed in like 3 huge spots) logic that they're using just with that one premise. Ofc, the longer they talk the worse it gets.

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I could try to simplify this as someone who is transexual and has a little/middle side because what we can forget is that what we're talking about is our sense of personal identity -what makes us, well us, as individuals - and our right to be ourselves.

Labels are not always helpful, sometimes leading to unheathy feelings when it comes to defining but if one accepts they exist, the thing we need to remember is we wear multiple labels that attempt to illustrate elements of our individual identity although I'm not sure when it comes to equating the struggle for such areas of equal opportunities we can put campaigns for gender equality in the workplace, gay marriage and so on in the exact same light.

I would agree there is a need to tackle head on the supposed assumptions toward pedophilia/sexualizing childhood, that diaper wearing is just a fetish (for some it may well be, for others it has a medical need even if they do find themselves enjoying it) and that pretty much everybody has a fetish or two while drawing the line at publically displaying ones underwear (swimwear is I feel different).

In my experience there are ways of taking a sense of being a little with you even if you may need to avoid overtly little or especially abdl

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I sometimes see this comparison being made, and it's usually done by a Cis person. When reading any post I always consider the source- there's a lot of differenrt kinds of people in the world and each has their own way of looking at and speaking of things ;) The almost-the-same thing said by two different people can have two very different meanings :rolleyes: Then there are their moods and feelings to consider as well. Communication is a lot more than just words! I can also understand Elfking's frustrations with this since he deals with society's discrimination and prejudice constantly.

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I am bisexual, while exploring my gay side over 20 years ago I did experience a number of problems which among things included ignorance of who I am, what being gay actually meant, my parents and close friends not understanding this wasn't a life style choice it is just who I am, being persecuted for wanting to practice it in complete privacy, and so on.

As an AB I have also experienced many similar problems. This is a very simple truth which I have personally experienced, and I do believe these similarities are both there and obviously there. I'm not saying being gay and being an AB is the same with the same exact problems. I'm just saying I have personally experienced may similarities between them.

I also believe that with the public being slowly and correctly informed about us then society will eventually become more accepting to it. Yet another similarity, or so I hope.

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I also want to clarify I have no intent to openly display my diapers (unless I'm at the beach- but that's another debate we've already had). Certainly no more than a gay couple would display their relationship in public (which open gay people do display their affection by holding hand, kissing, etc).

In other words. I don't want to feel like I have to go out of my way to hide I wear diapers, but I have not intention to go out of my way to display them either.

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This topic has gotten so worn out I would think my fellow kinksters would finally get it. The whole comparison is apples to oranges. The only reason this keeps coming up is some of our members here and on fetlife are so brain dead to get the fact that this fetish isn't the same as someone that is living their life experiencing daily judgement from our peers in society because those people are attempting to sort their lives out with the hand dealt to them. I applaud some of the people here that attempt to explain why this kink isn't the same as anyone in the LGBT community.

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I think the main distinction that needs to be made here is that being an AB is not a kink or fetish. It is a deep neurological drive that affects the very way we think. This is why everyone is driven back to it even after a big purge.

A fetish or kink is more something people like to do to feel Better, but can still be ignored or put off. For most here, diapers do fulfill this description, yet they also go much farther than that too.

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Guest YoungZeppelin

Please... this thread is just elf ranting again. We all know the answer to this question and it doesn't need to be brought up all the time. LGBT is embeded in our natural sexual drive process when we are born, while abdl fills a hole in the mind that searches for a "comfort zone" while we are young.

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I think people miss the point in comparison. I can only speak for myself so I will. I don't want to go out of my way and wear diapers openly. I want to be accepted and not be told to stop wearing them or be forced to, I don't want to be judged for it and looked down on. People may find out and I want to live my free life without worrying about getting caught with it or trying to keep it hidden like we don't have to hide the fact what underwear we wear under our clothes. Diapers is not something we chose to like, I never woke up one day and decided "I think I am going to like diapers and want to start wearing them again." This is who I am, it is not just a kink or a fetish. It is just not some hobby. Yes some people do choose diapers and can stop it anytime and not have to do it. Lot of us have tried to stop doing it only to give us depression and anxiety and distress. Does this sound similar to LGBT when they can't be who they are? Also trying to hide your diaper fetish also causes stress. Seesh I even felt suicidal over this because I wanted it so bad but couldn't do it and the only way to end it was if I died and the only thing that kept me alive was fear of death and fear of surviving if I attempted it and having to live my life in a wheelchair.

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Please... this thread is just elf ranting again. We all know the answer to this question and it doesn't need to be brought up all the time. LGBT is embeded in our natural sexual drive process when we are born, while abdl fills a hole in the mind that searches for a "comfort zone" while we are young.

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Spokane Girl, we'll said.

Elfking, like others have pointed out, being drawn to diapers is not something we can simply turn off. This doesn't mean we are obsessed by it or addicted to diapers. It is a constant part of us though and absolutely does effect our decisions, beliefs, social status, etc. This alone by no means, means any of us needs psychiatric help, it is simply something that makes us who we are. Very much like being gay doesn't mean you need help either. See, yet another similarity that applies perfectly here.

I also believe you need to understand what a fetish is. Please look here. http://i.word.com/idictionary/fetish

Being an AB is not even sexual in nature, therefore it is not a fetish. Yes, I do agree with you that fetishes have a place in a bedroom, but other people do not need to know about them. Societal acceptance of AB's is quite a different matter though. This applies even without any of us purposely wanting to show or expose our diapers as it is bound to happen any ways.

As to the comparison I made before, and the point you missed, is that you can't hide wearing a diaper completely no matter how much you may try or want to. Gay people don't have to worry about hiding who they are any where as much as they used to, so why should we be stressing out over going out of our ways to hide who we are. See the similarity? Your ideology simply isn't being fair in that regard- especially if someone has to wear a diaper, not necessarily out of choice yet (like me) still likes them very much.

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Guest YoungZeppelin

Ha I love making elf mad... I just hear u bring it up in a lot of places so it seems like a rant to me... just because I pointed something out about a post doesn't mean I have to disagree with it. Everyones opinion has been just about the same as it always is because this is a place of people with the same interests and lifestyles. I agree with everyone with the ideal of difference. I also overly enjoy these theory discussions over the diaper threads, I wish there were more.

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Elfking, know how some people are so incredibly homophobic because they are insecure and afraid that they them selves might be gay? They speak out against gays because it challenges their preconceptions, and misguided beliefs.

I get this impression with you to a point on being an adult baby. You are coming across as being very vocal against AB's, yet you secretly post here because you are one.

I hope this particular gay/AB similarity doesn't offend you too much, but hopefully it might get you thinking some more.

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Guest YoungZeppelin

Elfking, know how some people are so incredibly homophobic because they are insecure and afraid that they them selves might be gay? They speak out against gays because it challenges their preconceptions, and misguided beliefs.

I get this impression with you to a point on being an adult baby. You are coming across as being very vocal against AB's, yet you secretly post here because you are one.

I hope this particular gay/AB similarity doesn't offend you too much, but hopefully it might get you thinking some more.

This is kind of what I was I was trying to say but with more extensive sarcasm. :P

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This is kind of what I was I was trying to say but with more extensive sarcasm. :P

I kind of picked up on that, but contrary to what anyone may think I'm neutral enough to just get the point without caring to try a get someone mad. If now I happen to do it any ways then that's just more fun to watch.

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Elfking, know how some people are so incredibly homophobic because they are insecure and afraid that they them selves might be gay? They speak out against gays because it challenges their preconceptions, and misguided beliefs.

I get this impression with you to a point on being an adult baby. You are coming across as being very vocal against AB's, yet you secretly post here because you are one.

I hope this particular gay/AB similarity doesn't offend you too much, but hopefully it might get you thinking some more.

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I'm not a closeted AB, I have a lot of nappies, a bottle, a pacifier, an all in one, a lot of little clothes, I'm engaged to another AB, I've visited an AB nursery 4 or 5 times, there are some members here that I am close to that have seen pictures of me in combinations of the above, my avatar is a picture of my teddy bear and I have been here 7 years, I'm a moderator in the chat.

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I am a straight male that has no problem with the LGBT the community I have real life and lots of online LGBT friends. I find a lot of gays assume that I am gay do to my ABDL side this happens a lot on experience project no matter how many times I put I am straight on my profile there I get people wanting to be my daddy or just want to date me. I have also been asked to change another guys diaper. So I have come to the conclusion that people tend to think that ABDL =LGBT. I usually respond to these guys saying sorry I am straight but that doesn't mean we can't be online friends. I wonder the ratio of straight verses LGBT ABDLs out there I think the LGBT out numbers the straight ABDLs.

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