Outed And Not Sure What To Do

[blu4]

Well to cut a long story short I had been toying with the idea of coming out on Fetlife but have been a bit apprehensive even though deep down I guess I really wanted to.

[Bettypooh]

BSDM relationships are a bit different from the usual but one thing is constant- you do nothing to someone else unless they are willing to accept it, especially in public From what you wrote, it seems that you first agreed to having the pic posted, so there is now some room for your partner to disagree based on your relationship. It is still your pic- not theirs- so you can demand that it be taken down but that may also affect the relationship. Whether to take that risk is something you have to decide for yourself.

[Infernus]

I cant see the big deal about being outed on FL, people are USUALLY pretty open minded of all different fetishes on there.

[blu4]

People have already commented on the photo and thankfully it has all been positive and I do like being controlled but I just feel a bit shy now if you know what I mean and I guess I hope that the people that I have met me already don't think I am some sort of freak!!

[Bettypooh]

If the people who already know me don't think I am weird already then they never will As to those I haven't met yet, well they will get used to me.... maybe even liking me like most folks do Glad it's going OK for you and I think it will keep going that way;)

[harmony83]

Well I can understand your concern, I've been outed numerous times and it can be heart raceing.

[happyindprs]

I can't believe being outed on Fetlife is any big deal.

[whisko]

i was on fetlife for a few months, chatted a bit, and found a co-worker into "small penis humiliation"! lol! i will never let him know that i saw that. he probably didn't notice me; he hadn't visited in months. but for pete's sake, he posted one of the same pictures on fetlife as he did on facebook! :-P

once i felt fairly confident that there's no big oklahoma city dl scene that i'm missing out on, i generally got overwhelmed by the variety of interests on fetlife and closed my account there. i'm not interested enough in bdsm or polyamory or most of the more typical things i saw there. i especially didn't like how people can add to their profile every single variety of everything they like, sexual or not, and sometimes just weird or goofy quotes, and clog up the whole list of represented interests. fetlife's "signal-to-noise ratio" was just too high for me.

i've met up with a handful of people in real life and all of those people i met on ab/dl websites. now i focus on three sites, all for slightly different reasons.