TRIGGERS

[noahVmiller]

Hello all I am seeking your advice. I'm currently in a relationship with my first ever mommy in real life and life couldn't get any better...well let me back up.

First off we are currently long distance so that creates problems for being little. One of the reasons I truely enjoy regressing is the fact that it feels like therapy for my mind. I suffer from a minor form of PTSD where certain things can become "triggers" in my life. These triggers could be anything from me feeling like someone is talking about me in third person, or random coincidences in life that cause all sorts of anxiety because I can't explain it. Anyway these triggers are really taking a toll on my relationship. The most frustrating thing is I feel like I have no control over the situation.

Oddly enough having no control is something I crave, and yet I'm currently feeling powerless and suffering from all this anxiety.

I have expressed my desire to be powerless with my mommy and she seems put off by the idea. She's so dominant in every aspect of her life I thought being in control would be something she desired. Sometimes I feel like she is giving me mixed signals about being little. It's like one day she's all for it, and the next she's pulling back the reins. Granted, I know it's difficult because we are long distance AND I AKNOWLEDGE THAT. When we do get to spend time together I shy away from being little because I don't want to "give up" my time with her.

Ideally my mommy would take control and allow me to be her little for as much of the time as she could handle. She always asks me about my limits and I tell her my limits are up to her. Honestly I don't have concrete limits as a little. Nothing scares me about the idea, and it's ultimately something I want and NEED.

I want my mommy to know that I am okay feeling powerless if she takes on a more commanding role. Right now it's so difficult to feel in control when the reality is my hands are tied. It's almost like putting your foot on the gas and the car not accelerating because the parking brake is on.

I honestly think that if my mommy took control I would be able to accept things "being out of my hands."

I love my mommy more than anything and she knows I'd do anything to make our relationship work. I just can't figure out how to look past these triggers in my daily life. I also can't understand how to accept being powerless when I have no control over my current situation.

I could really use some advice - please.

[Baby Brian]

For me, long distance relationships have never worked out over the long term. If you really want to be with this person, then I'd suggest you find a way to move closer to her. Other than that, I'd suggest you just keep looking around where you live.

[babybabbles]

True the best way to make a relation work is closeness as for as well one whom a domme and that can fit your needs of being little and help you find your happiness in full of her arms and power of her protecting you as a little.

[Elfy]

If you aren't doing so now, you need to see a therapist regarding "triggers". People act almost proud to have them these days, at least from what I've seen online, but the reality is they show there is something very wrong that requires professional help to get rid of.

[noahVmiller]

I understand the importance of balance in a relationship. Like I said before I have no expectations when it comes to being little so that means in no way do I expect it to be a 24/7 activity. I guess I just find it frustrating when it feels like I have to keep sacrificing little time when all I want to do is regress.

My mommy will not let me move to where she lives and she wont be able to relocate for at least another year. Any suggestions on how I can try and bridge the distance gap?

Also my mommy doesn't seem to understand that it's extremely difficult as a little to "initiate" role play. Naturally as a little you are submissive so it doesn't feel right in any sense to be "putting in requests" for little time.

One of the things that I really think would help as therapy would be regular spanking but my mommy has zero interest in that. I've told her I want to "open the floodgates" and let my emotions loose. I feel so bottled up all the time like I'm going to explode but I want to be able to reach that vulnerable place with her and let my emotions explode.

Thank you for all the continued advice and support.

[Elfy]

Spanking would not help as much as therapy... You need to speak to someone who knows what they are talking about, has experience in helping and can help you through the problems... You caould be spanked from here to the end of time and it wouldn't help. Not every problem can be solved with ABDL related activity.

[noahVmiller]

I'm not saying abdl is the answer to everything, but I know for me personally in my current situation it would be easier to accept being out of control if I knew someone else was in control. It's scary to know you are not in control.

Spanking would help me because it would be a much needed release.