Another person traveling towards Incontinence

[zzyzx]

22 hours ago, Spargano said:

3. I am looking to order plastic pants from Babykins, but before I do, I want to make sure I get the right size. I am a medium betterdry, a small megamax, small confidry. So my question is, would I order mediums since that’s my general diaper size? Would I order large to be a size bigger than my disposables? What’s the appropriate way to measure to get it right? Too big and it’s useless, too small and I get uncomfortable ligature marks and rashes.

@Spargano:

It is always interesting to find properly fitting plastic pants.  Personally, I have yet to find a protective pant sold by Kins where I don't prefer another company's cut of the pants over what Kins does.  Ok, I mostly wear cloth.  Most of Kins protective pants I've tried are cut too short in the side seam / cut more like a normal "tighty whitey" style cotton underpants, which don't provide proper coverage for me where I need a seal at the legs.

Best wishes in finding what works for you.

[DLJeff52]

22 hours ago, Spargano said:

 

3. I am looking to order plastic pants from Babykins, but before I do, I want to make sure I get the right size. I am a medium betterdry, a small megamax, small confidry. So my question is, would I order mediums since that’s my general diaper size? Would I order large to be a size bigger than my disposables? What’s the appropriate way to measure to get it right? Too big and it’s useless, too small and I get uncomfortable ligature marks and rashes.

hope everyone has a great weekend!

I'm a BetterDry large and I ordered the XL Babykins Double lined Terry cloth and it works well.  The large was too snug in the legs for me. So I ended up ordering a size up and it was awesome.  Good luck!

[Spargano]

38 minutes ago, DLJeff52 said:

I'm a BetterDry large and I ordered the XL Babykins Double lined Terry cloth and it works well.  The large was too snug in the legs for me. So I ended up ordering a size up and it was awesome.  Good luck!

Thank you so much! That’s the kind of experience I wanted to hear before I order. I will order a large and see if that is good before ordering more

[Spargano]

Well, I am certainly glad I ordered up a size. The waist is extremely large with slight give and comes up to my belly button without feeling tight. The thighs are a different story. They are almost too tight. To the point I almost wish I ordered XL but then it probably would fall off my hips. I am guessing my runner thighs make for fatter circumference.

That aside; I am just in awe of these. Yes, they add a little waddle, but with these on I am finally able to confront an issue that long hurt the process: STOPPING THE STREAM.

 

for years I have slowed or stopped the stream while peeing if I sensed it was going to leak. Now, I am able to tell myself, “let go, it’s fine.”

especially in bed this is a big deal and is giving me a lot of happiness. I explained my order to my wife that I was tired of leaking on the bed and thought this might help.

 

now, they are significantly bigger than I thought they would be, so they will take up most of a drawer all by themselves. (I purchased 3 to get the free shipping). My question is how does laundering these monsters go?

do you include them with other towels and whatnot or wash them by themselves. How is the drying process for them to prevent mildew?

 

thanks everyone in advance for your advice and thoughts!

[DLJeff52]

3 hours ago, Spargano said:

My question is how does laundering these monsters go?

I wash them in warm water, normal cycle.  I do dry them on normal dry but always include more items as I find that the plastic can wear out faster if left alone to be exposed to the heat of the dryer cylinder.  That said, I have had zero problems with mildew and while it may take a little longer to dry, they show relatively little wear from wash usage.  I also have let them finish drying by taking the Terry cloth lining out and hanging them on a hanger by the plastic part over an AC vent!  Takes a little longer, but then less wear from the dryer.  I would say I "leak" into them one out of every 3 nights and have a rotation of 3 as well.  That said, I would say mine get washed an average of 3-5 times a month.  I had one develop holes near the leg seam after 6 months of use, but the others have held up just fine.

Hope that helps!

 

[oznl]

On 8/16/2022 at 7:47 AM, DLJeff52 said:

 I also have let them finish drying by taking the Terry cloth lining out and hanging them on a hanger by the plastic part over an AC vent! 

It's this.  With these products, the terry lining is not fixed to the waterproof pant at the leggings.  This allows the terry inner pant to be pulled out from the water proof pant via the waist opening so that it is exposed to air on all sides.  This will vastly accelerate the drying process.

Lately it seems I've had very little nocturnal leakage (making THAT claim should break that drought)!  If I haven't peed in them, I'll wash them anyway after a week or two.

[Spargano]

Zombie revival 🧟‍♂️

j/k, but it’s been a year since I last posted in the thread and thought I would make some updates. 
 

i have been diapered 24/7 the entire time, but I would not say I have gotten any further in the journey to incontinence other than comfort in peeing in most positions.

 

the problems has always been flooding which overwhelms the diapers. This pushed me to ever continue to search for a higher and higher capacity diaper to survive my surges. I would get so jealous of the progress of others on this board and even more look at the claims for many diaper wearers “I just can’t get it to leak.”

 

but somehow or another I have had a resurgent epiphany, which is common sense but I lost sight of: pee more frequently! The faster you empty the bladder the less time it has to fill and create a flood situation. 
 

enter my new fiend. An app “P- water tracker.” It’s ostensibly an app to make sure one stays hydrated but it’s functionality is logging every time you pee like a bladder diary, but unlike a diary, this can send your alerts that it’s been too long since your last pee. By focusing on this I am striving to keep to under an hour between pees, ideally 15-30 minutes to train the bladder to release as often as possible. 
 

obviously there are times I cannot focus and 3 hours might go by between pees. But I feel as long as those are rarer, the training will continue to bear fruit.

 

i am currently using rearz mega diapers as my go to. I wait for sales to purchase. I am also using Chinese diaper shorts instead of plastic pants. I use the rearz onesie as they have the best fit for me of any onesies I have purchased.

3rd start going and hopefully I can achieve the goals, including bed wetting.

 

i have seen the threads for stents and the surgery. For the surgery, 25-30k is a LOT of disposable income. I do not have it, and the surgery looks to contain risks.

same with the stents. I tried the catheter route but it was too painful. 
 

the route I am on might be slower, but I know it’s safe.

 

So for those who have gone this route and been successful, how many times a day should one shoot for and how many weeks/months of forcing the issue before trying to do the “ignore” method?

i started 3 days ago and it’s gone up each day. 16 on day one, 18 on day two, 20 yesterday and I already at 18 now, so likely 22-24 for today. Should I be striving for 30-48 wettings to truly condition the bladder to be ready to empty every 15-20 minutes?

 

 

Edited January 25 by Spargano
Question

[ppdude]

What the heck are Chinese pants? Who'd ever give up plastic panties?

 

[Spargano]

16 minutes ago, ppdude said:

What the heck are Chinese pants? Who'd ever give up plastic panties?

 

I am glad you asked 😉. They are nursing home shorts that have terry cloth inside, short material on the outside with a waterproof layer in-between. You can find them on Amazon by searching diaper shorts.

i prefer them because they are breathable and catch the leaks out of the back of the leg, which is the main concern. Essentially they a like bloomers evolved. All the protection, none of the heat, construction rashes or tearing vinyl 

[superabsorbantpolymer]

I've had similar thoughts about increasing frequency. In the past I had a phone alarm every 15 mins to remind me to pee. When people have oab, the first line of treatment is bladder training, extending the length between voids etc, so I think we are onto something. I know my capacity has gone down as a result of it. I used to be able to go hours without peeing. Now it's at least once an hour. 

[Spargano]

Insert Rocky Theme

So the image is how many pees per day. As you can see, each day is getting progressively more and more urination episode. 

 

lest I get ahead of myself, I have to remember that this was only achieved by focus focus focus!

by being manic to make sure I pee every hour, I am starting to get bladder spasms in which I think I have to pee, but nothing will come out. This will usually be an indicator I need to drink some more, but not too fast or I will unbalance myself. 
 

i have also noticed when I am sitting down the spasms don’t happen as often. It’s funny though, as I write freely. I am ten + years I into this journey and it’s only now that I am slowing down. Meaning, I wanted to rush to the “don’t think about it phase” to allow urine to just come freely when what I should have been doing was bladder training like crazy to make the habit of peeing frequently irresistible. This may take months or years to accomplish, but once that piece is in place, then I can try the distraction techniques.

 

my mantra for the next few days “go for 30!”

[Spargano]

And I hit 40, yay! I have a very goal oriented mind and the apps really help with that. 
 

still, I only hit that mark because I stayed up way too late. 
i do not have sleep wetting yet, but I am hoping this training will interrupt the sleep eventually so that I I’ll wet multiple times and thus train the wake, pee, sleep until eventually I stop waking. But I am waking up very thirsty so the hydration balance is working 

[Kevin140]

On 1/25/2024 at 9:59 PM, Spargano said:

but somehow or another I have had a resurgent epiphany, which is common sense but I lost sight of: pee more frequently! The faster you empty the bladder the less time it has to fill and create a flood situation. 
 

enter my new fiend. An app “P- water tracker.” It’s ostensibly an app to make sure one stays hydrated but it’s functionality is logging every time you pee like a bladder diary, but unlike a diary, this can send your alerts that it’s been too long since your last pee. By focusing on this I am striving to keep to under an hour between pees, ideally 15-30 minutes to train the bladder to release as often as possible. 
 

obviously there are times I cannot focus and 3 hours might go by between pees. But I feel as long as those are rarer, the training will continue to bear fruit.

I am someone who wanted to achieve OAB and I achieved it. And it took me 5 years to achieve it. However, I can't say whether this depends on my "advanced" age, or just my training, or both.

I say anyone who wants to achieve incontinence should go the OAB route.

So you got it exactly right: pee as often as possible!

But I did this without an app, just with diapers, as soon as I felt the slightest urge, I let go!

I discovered that the development of this slight pressure depends on many things: am I well hydrated, have I eaten something, am I taking medication, ...

But I can also say from my experience that in order to achieve OAB, I wasn't always well hydrated, I just listened to my bladder in every way.

Therefore, it is absolutely not a question of time-controlled letting go, but rather letting go adapted to the needs of your body. Maybe I'm someone who perceives his body's signals very well and can react to them accordingly. For others, this app timer is the better way.

But I think listen to your bladder, don't worry if you don't have to pee for 1-3 hours - your body itself controls the desire to let go. This is the most natural way to get OAB and OAB is the most important first step to achieve complete incontinence!

[secretdesire]

I'm 4.5 years into 24/7. I'm pretty certain I've achieved OAB. Before I started this I had an 8 ounce bladder capacity. I don't think it's shrunk much. I can still hold it if I want but not for longer than about an hour. Most days are complete auto pilot and I just pee as soon as the need hits. Occasional I'll become aware only after the fact. I'm completely incontinent at night. I'm pretty close to full #2 incontinence. Instant urges to go and I have seconds of warning before I'm going to let loose. I think part of this #2 progress is that my bowels just suck. I legit have IBS and I can't really feel whats going on in there. I didn't set out to lose bowel continence but it was super easy to just let go of it versus deal with the urge pains I had before. I think full daytime urinary incontinence is definitely a long game to achieve.

[Spargano]

7 hours ago, secretdesire said:

I'm 4.5 years into 24/7. I'm pretty certain I've achieved OAB. Before I started this I had an 8 ounce bladder capacity. I don't think it's shrunk much. I can still hold it if I want but not for longer than about an hour. Most days are complete auto pilot and I just pee as soon as the need hits. Occasional I'll become aware only after the fact. I'm completely incontinent at night. I'm pretty close to full #2 incontinence. Instant urges to go and I have seconds of warning before I'm going to let loose. I think part of this #2 progress is that my bowels just suck. I legit have IBS and I can't really feel whats going on in there. I didn't set out to lose bowel continence but it was super easy to just let go of it versus deal with the urge pains I had before. I think full daytime urinary incontinence is definitely a long game to achieve.

Wish I had that capacity and the ability to just release on command. Sometimes that happens, but more often I have to focus and relax my body until it releases.

 

the photos attached are my progress thus far on how many wettings per day. On days when I can focus, and hydrate appropriately, it’s always around 18-26 (barring one-offs like January 26). But on days that are work heavy in the sense of meetings which happen primarily on Monday - Wednesday I see a precipitous drop. I am not drinking that much less in that time, but my mind is focused on work. 

[Baby Toni38]

What program are you using to track.

[Spargano]

20 hours ago, Baby Toni38 said:

What program are you using to track.

https://apps.apple.com/app/id1090749982

[Spargano]

So, I have noticed over the last couple of days that a integral part of the process is “water balancing” by drinking essentially what I am emptying every time I empty I am keeping the factory moving in the body to produce more urine. This has led to wettings every ten or so minutes when I am focusing and leading to this big number wetting days. It also helps to drink water when I am struggling to relax as it mentally seems to push out the old and welcome the new. 
 

not sure if it’s my bladder or my dog waking me, but I am also going 4 times a night usually, albeit awake when doing so.
 

i just wish when the urge hit it would just GO instead of me mentally having to relax and focus on open state. It takes between 15 seconds and 3 minutes of focus for the bladder spasm to occur and the wetting to start once I focus. I just don’t always have 3 minutes to focus on starting the flow.
 

for example, let’s say I am walking, I want to wet while walking but I have to focus on relaxed tone as the urges hits. I often get where I am going before the spasm hits and have to pace around until it goes. I am unable to release when changing positions rapidly. So if I am walking to my car, I might be able to pee on the way to the car, but often I make it to the car before it releases. Then once I sit down I have to refocus and it becomes a seated car wetting with focus as opposed to a walking wetting with focus. I look forward to the day, IF IT EVER COMES, when I can release immediately on urge.

 

these smaller voids have made all this practice possible. I am rarely worried about floods or leaks in general due to trust in my diaper and my “diaper shorts”/onsie combo.10 years of diaper dependency but I only feel i am now making progress. Maybe it took that long to get comfortable to  pee while driving, while walking, while running. I just have ti focus on relaxed tone each time. For bed, I can go on my back no problem. On my side and on my stomach the pressure really has to mount before the bladder releases for some reason.

 

heres hoping the balancing trick continues. 

[Spargano]

https://youtu.be/Plvk8mCtwKQ?si=QBgeCFvDnH7_br0D

ok, maybe I am dumb, but I didn’t know some of these tips he offered in referencing to closing gaps. I feel like I am relearning how to put on a diaper.

 

will need to do some field testing to see if it indeed makes a difference in practice.

[incontinente]

On 2/20/2024 at 10:17 AM, Spargano said:

https://apps.apple.com/app/id1090749982

Thanks for sharing! This app is excellent, I had no idea how many times I peed in a day. But I've realized that sometimes I forget to register (when I'm concentrating on some office activity, for example).

[Spargano]

On 7/22/2019 at 2:45 PM, Eagleclc said:

I want to share a method that I'm experimenting with and having some decent results.  I have been mostly interested in becoming a bedwetter and have worn a diaper consistently at night for the past five years with little results.  I can easily wet in any position, but for the most part, I wake up and have to consciously wet.  I have also worn 24/7 for several extended periods, and am very comfortable in diapers.  By concentrating on staying relaxed after urinating, I have some post-void dribble but no real daytime incontinence.  

 

Over the years, I have experimented in holding to the point of uncontrollable wetting.  This has always been very uncomfortable and I always worried about the pressure back into the kidneys.  Recently, I began working on a modified version of holding that has been surprisingly successful.  As a warning, this method still involves holding against a contracted bladder.  The potential for kidney damage is still there, but I think it's less of a concern over time (which I'll explain).  

 

Basically, you need to already be comfortable and secure wearing high capacity protection.  Allow your bladder to become moderately filled, but not to the point of extreme urgency.  The next step is to initiate bladder contraction.  To do this, press firmly on the area just below your navel.  When you find the right spot, you will feel the urgency in your bladder.  This will take some trial and error to find the sweet spot.  I use both hands to increase the area being stimulated.  After you find the spot, press repeatedly about every second (kind of the same rhythm as CPR).  Within a minute or so, you should begin to feel your bladder start to contract.  Hold against this contraction until it passes.  Relax for about 10 seconds, and repeat this process.  

 

Each successful contraction becomes a little more uncomfortable.  The goal is to wear out the sphincter muscle by straining against the contractions over a period of time.  After a while, you will start to have little spurts that you can't stop from coming out.  The decision comes in how long to hold against the pressure before finally releasing.  This is where the potential risk comes in and you will have to decide how far to push it.  I suspect that there is less danger than if your bladder were completely filled and providing constant backpressure into the ureters.  (The periods of high pressure are just when you are stimulating the bladder to contract so I do think there is less risk than high capacity holding.)

 

Repeat frequently over the course of a day being sure to replace what you are urinating out, but don't drink liquids to excess.  As the day goes on, you should find it harder and harder to hold through the contractions and the spurts of urine harder to control.  Eventually, you will reach a point of no return and be unable to control a flood.  You will also begin to have bladder contractions when your bladder is full without external stimulation.  As your sphincter fatigues, you should find it harder to hold and for shorter periods of time.

 

The first day I tried this I wet the bed involuntarily that night.  It was the first time in five years that has happened.  I have been doing this every day for just under a week, and I've wet the bed consistently each night and slept through about half of those wettings.  

 

The tradeoff is wearing daytime diapers.  In order to keep the sphincter fatigued, I'm holding all the time until I can't hold back anymore.  That is taking much less time on day five than it did when I started.  I have no idea what longterm effects (if any) this method has.  Potentially, it could lead to longterm OAB or overflow incontinence.  It could also just be that everything would go back to normal if I stopped fatiguing my sphincter all day long.  I've decided to keep it up for a couple of weeks to see how things develop.

 

Again, there are risks and it may not work for you as it has for me.  One side effects that I've had is soreness in my diaphragm from clinching up while trying to fight through contractions.  That has gotten better as the ability to hold has lessened.

 

I'd be curious to know if anyone else gives it a shot and how it works for them.

So, not doing the excessive holds, but I have to say, this a lot of fun. Tapping the bladder to force the spasms feels nice. The squirts as the sphincter gives way is also incredible. There have also been a few involuntary after-urination spurts that are either urine left in the urethra expelling on its own, or the bladder continuing to contract a few minutes after the jabbing finishes due to the flood.

 

I’ll report back if it bears fruit after doing it often through the day. The only thing I don’t like is that to the outside viewer, it might look like I am masturbating poking my bladder, but it is a neat feeling. I wonder if an electric massager would accomplish the same effect. In Britain they have something called the “the queen” which was actually developed along the same lines as this exercise and it’s supposed to help with urinary retention. Specifically as an alternative to catheterization.

 

you all might notice I did a foray into stents which I regret. Not because of my errors and trials, but because I frightened one of our great innovators and posters with a picture of the failed stent. Out of respect for him, I am going to stay away from that method of incontinence and go back to the long haul method.

i have noticed when I keep my bladder “open” I constantly feel like I need to pee, even when I don’t. I don’t know if this is just what the “drop” is supposed to feel like and then over time it becomes less noticeable? 
 

i am also confused because of the dichotomy maintain that open state, which requires concentration, and “ignore your bladder.” Additionally, I read reverse kegels will actually give more control and not less. Are these reverse kegals we are doing by maintaining that “drop” feeling?

 

 

3 hours ago, incontinente said:

Thanks for sharing! This app is excellent, I had no idea how many times I peed in a day. But I've realized that sometimes I forget to register (when I'm concentrating on some office activity, for example).

Glad to see the app is helpful 😁

[Spargano]

Some neat side effects of bladder tapping.

1. I had some involuntary squirts.

2. The feeling of milking the bladder, feeling the urine flow out with each press of my fingers on the bladder, is both addictive and so pleasurable. That alone makes this technique fun to do over and over again.

3. I had a bout of stress incontinence that I have NEVER had before. I bent over to pick something up and felt a gush of pee as my stomach put pressure on the bladder.

 

 

on doing some research, I discovered this is an offshoot of the Credé maneuver, which can be dangerous long term as putting heavy pressure on the bladder can cause issues.

https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/procedures/crede-maneuver

this is a safer method of stimulation.