LL Medico Diapers and More Bambino Adult Baby Diapers

submlmaid

Members
  • Content count

    6
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Community Reputation

0 Neutral

About submlmaid

  • Rank
    Newborn
  • Birthday

Previous Fields

  • Diapers
    Diaper Lover
  • I Am a...
    Boy

Profile Information

  • Real Age
    31

Recent Profile Visitors

432 profile views
  1. What turns me off to a story: I'm not a big fan of magic, and magical transformations. This is because in most stories the magic only exists to make littles. The way I find it works best is when the magic exists in a way the implies a larger world, and not just as a crutch to allow some Big to baby a little. It has to function to consistent rules that don't contradict each other for the convenience of plot. Paragraphs, learn how to use them. Same goes for chapters. Writing good dialogue is a difficult skill to learn. It can be frustrating to read, but I can take bad dialogue if its formatted well. The Victorian Matron domme that is also common in crossdressing fantasies. She is really just a caricature that exists solely to satisfy the fantasies of the little/crossdresser. She is also a bitch. I have never in my life met a woman that acts like this. I don't understand why she is a cliche. The Big isn't in it for the diapers and the cleanup. No one wants a dependent adult that doesn't contribute in any way to the family. That type of person is seen as a burden, usually has legitimate disabilities, and some rare, blessed people take on that burden. Find out what the Big gets out of having a little, find ways for the little to contribute. Otherwise I don't understand how the relationship works, or why the Big domme-type wants to enslave the the little. The little has to want it, even just a little. Otherwise it starts to get rapey. Underage. I get that there is a genre for this even without the sex. But to me this is fap material, and it frustrates me to get a few paragraphs into a good read only to find out the main character's ten. Diapers aren't what makes the story interesting, it's the drama. The characters are people in themselves with their own wants and needs. Their lives are independent of the story; they have existed before the story began, and will continue to exist after the story is over. The drama comes from the relationships between characters, and the situations the characters are in. Diapers can be central to this drama, the Big/little dynamic can be central to this drama. But diapers don't make the drama, the characters do. Cringy public displays that in a normal world would get a person some very unwanted, official attention. Either change the world rules (diaper dimension), create a safe-space with consenting adults, or keep it private with the public unaware.
  2. I was inspired by the folks over in Incontinent-Desires. There's a rather industrious group there making stents for creating incontinence as opposed to using catheters. So I just extrapolated a bit, and added a little modern/slightly futuristic tech. I hope ye enjoy. The Stent "The Medican advanced urethral stent is a revolution in urinary incontinence support. Patients that cath, have trouble with bladder leakage, or those who just can't sleep through the night now have a viable, non-invasive treatment option. The stent works just like a catheter, without the uncomfortable external tubes. The bulbous head sits right inside the bladder, expands to resist untimely removal and contains a tiny radio receiver and valve that gives the patient complete control over their bladder function. Installation is easy, and unlike catheters is entirely concealed within the body, minimizing risk of infection or irritation. It uses the body's own motion and heat for power." Nikki looked up from the package. Her husband looked down at her in obvious anticipation. "How would this work?" She looked back down, the box heavy in her hands. Roger lifted it, turned it to show her a picture. "It comes with a remote that the patient would normally keep. That tells it to be open or closed. 'Complete control at your finger tips.'" He laughed. "But I can spoof that signal with my phone, or tell your phone to transmit, or send it through the house signal." "Why?" She asked, her voice heavy with trepidation. He smiled sadistically. "Because I want to control you completely. Because you want to give up control." He set the package aside, and began rubbing her back. He worked his hand under her shirt, scratching at itches that revealed themselves. Nikki leaned into his hand. It moved up along her spine to the braided chain that ran around her torso. Another hand caressed along her belly, and up to one of the steel domes that encased her breasts. A low moan escaped her lips as she counted back the weeks since she last felt his hands on her heavy mounds. He lifted her shirt to reveal the steel bra. A pair of chains descended to a steel belt that curved ergonomically around her waist. "Yeah, I think you want it bad." "Please." She begged. "How long has it been?" "I played with your cunt this morning, Sir." "Orgasm?" "Six weeks, four days." "So you just had one." Nikki pouted. "Tell you what, I'll let you decide if you want to have the stent or not." He leaned in to kiss her. "I don't… know." He slid into the chair next to her, his arms probing her body. The hand on her back slid forward to cup the steel bra. His other hand descended into her pants, feeling around the steel shield over her mons. Fingers reached through the thin slit that allowed Nikki just enough room to rub her clit through the chastity belt, but impossible to get anything near enough to penetrate. "Well just ask yourself, is your bladder control worth an orgasm?" "…no." The hands pulled away, "No? Well if you don't want it." Nikki grabbed the hands trying to get her husband to feel her up again. But put back to her body they just sat limp against her skin. "Please!" She tried to force his hands to work, desperately wanting him to manipulate her body even while she knew he was manipulating her mind. With a huff she gave up, throwing his hands down. "I understand. You don't want it, you don't have to have it." He started to climb out of the chair." "Your cock." He stopped. "What was that?" "Your cock. I want it. That's how I cum, or no deal." He grinned, knowing he'd won. He slipped back into the chair, pulling her into his lap. "God! I knew you'd do anything for an orgasm." His hands returned more deft than ever, reaching into places that had gone too long without sensation. "You're pathetic." Nikki moaned, "No, only with your cock." He replied by nuzzling her neck. "Please, I want your dick in me!" "Eh, you know I'd stick it in mud sooner than you. What would my girlfriend say?" Despite herself Nikki humped the hand manipulating her clit. "Besides, you'd beg to fuck mud if you thought you had a chance to get off." He nuzzled her again as she arched her head back into him, his lips suckling at her neck like a vampire from the movies. "No, please. I want your dick. I want your cock in me!" But his hands still invaded her, while refusing to unlock the steel prison that prevented what she wanted most. She still didn't try to push him away. His hands roved over her and through her. Her breath quickened, and her muscles tightened. "Please wait! Stop! Please, I want your dick, I want your dick!" Her whining turned into deep moaning. She tried to beg, but her words were lost to the sensations filling her. Too long she'd gone, masturbating according to his schedule. Edging, but not cumming. Too long she'd spent on the precipice of desire, that she couldn't stop herself when his deft movements pushed her over it. Her voice was raw from the shouting, her muscles sore from the strain. The sensations faded slowly even as she wanted to dwell in them for just a little longer. Her master's voice came to her from a distance, whispering into her ear. "I knew you'd sell it cheap." His words were hurtful, but they both knew it just renewed her desire. * Her wrists were cuffed to the headboard, and her ankles spread to the corners of the bed. Nikki's moans had reached their crescendo, and were quieting down. He pulled out of her, and she felt a small stab of disappointment. She'd wanted to feel him cum inside her. But he loved to steal away small satisfactions as her mind reveled in the shame of his denial. "Satisfied?" She nodded, still enjoying the tide of sensations through her body. He left her to the pleasure, but quickly returned with a pile of supplies. He came around the bed, and slipped a blindfold on her, followed by a ball gag stuffed in her mouth. "I don't want to listen to your complaints." He said as he moved away from her. Nikki felt the bed depress between her legs. A folded towel was placed under her, she could hear him unwrapping plastic and opening the box. She came down from the sexual high, her muscles began to tense. Worries about injury, and what this new level of control would mean for her filtered through her mind as they had ever since he showed her the device. She felt a cool touch as he placed some gel against her warm, sensitive spot. "Just relax, Dear. This will be quick." Not for the first time had she suddenly felt apprehension at giving herself to a med student all those years ago. His hands began to manipulate her labia, pressing into her pussy, teasing out the urethra. A sharp pain at that entrance startled her. "Just relax, this is the hard part, but it will go fast." Master said in a soothing voice. The burn dulled to a tingle, but it climbed up into her. She tried to relax, but it took a conscious effort. "Okay, I need you to relax, like you're going to the bathroom. Just ease it out. Oh! Yes, that's it, don't worry about the mess." She felt something slip deeper in until it popped into place. "There!" And then something slipped out of her. "All done!" She heard the double slap sound of latex gloves being removed. And oddly the sound of a trickle. She realized she was peeing! "Okay now, let's see." The trickle stopped. "Success!" * She sat on the toilet and looked at her phone. It had been an incredibly frustrating day. Chugging water and Gatorade, he'd been testing out the new toy in her body all day. Trying different tricks with the signal, different combinations of devices, and different ways of sending it so that no matter what she would be stuck with what he wanted for her bladder. The last test had been most frustrating because he was checking how strong the signal had to be for the stent to receive it. Brief dribbles would spill out with him shouting, "Did you get it?" from further and further away. The damn thing was surprisingly sensitive. Now he was at home, while she was at the mall; full to bursting, and stuck waiting for him to do something about it. She found herself fidgeting, trying to hold it despite it having no effect on her control at all. The phone lit up, "Sending now." His text said. After a pause, she felt her bladder open up, and the torrent pass out of her. When it finished she stood and began cleaning herself he sent another text, "Did it work?" "Yes." she sent back. "Woohoo!" Came the reply. He was so cute when he was so enthusiastic, but right now she couldn't muster a similar energy. * It took a while for her sleep dulled mind to realize what she was doing. She stared at the green digits that displayed 3:42. Sitting on the toilet, she waited for something that she suddenly realized wasn't going to happen. It wasn't unusual for her to get up in the middle of the night to pee, even when she would normally go right before bed. She felt a stab of frustration that she couldn't go. Her husband was fast asleep, there was no way he'd be happy with her waking him up for this. With a sigh she stood, pulling her panties up. The one blessing in all this was that he wanted to leave off the chastity belt for now just in case something unexpected happens. For a moment she was tempted to grab his phone to try to make it work, but she couldn't bring herself to be that disobedient even though she knew the password. Instead she made her way back to the bedroom slipping back under the covers next to her husband. Sleep was long in coming, as the need to go kept insisting that she get up and do it. * Lock_N'key: "May I use the bathroom, Sir?" Sir_geon: "Sure." Lock_N'key: "I wasn't in the bathroom yet!" Sir_geon: "Not my problem." Lock_N'key: ">(" Sir_geon: "Go clean yourself up, Bitch." * Nikki looked hopefully at her phone again. She was sitting in a filthy stall at the mall, panties around her knees, sitting on a toilet that she'd had to wipe down, and all she could do was wait. It'd been twenty five minutes since she asked him to let her go, and no response. Her phone refused to show her a message from her husband no matter how many times she looked. She just waited, listening to others come and go. It felt surreal. She knew when to go to the bathroom, but she also had no control over it. It was a thing that just happened. She waited for it to happen, she knew that it would, eventually. But when it did was always a surprise to her. A few days ago he'd set up a schedule where the signal would be sent automatically. He'd even figured out how to make her phone transmit even if it was turned off. She often thought about draining the battery, but that only would work away from the house or the car. And she would have no way to make herself go when she wanted. Three times each day she absolutely had to be in the bathroom or she'd have an accident. Frustrated, she stuffed the phone back in her purse. She stood up, but then sat back down with a silent curse. Today she'd had coffee with some friends, and the pressure had built. It wasn't the first time she'd asked for an off-schedule pee, but this was the first time that he remained silent. Part of Nikki wondered if this was one of those times he was trying to teach her a lesson. Maybe he was telling that she could only go at her scheduled times. That didn't seem likely, as a doctor he put a great store about being healthy, and holding it too long could cause damage or infections. The question is, is he making her wait on purpose, or because he's busy? He's a doctor, he is a busy man. She almost stood up again, but was startled by her urine hitting the water. * Nikki's eyes shot open. The dream, a foggy waterscape in the middle of a torrential downpour faded from her memory as the urgency that startled her awake stole her attention. A hand pressed urgently against her crotch but the water poured through her fingers. "Honey?" "Honey!" "Master!" "Huh?" "Something's wrong!" He rolled over, "What's up?" he asked bleary eyed. "It's broken! Look!" She said lifting the blankets. It was too late to prevent anything, the bed was soaked, and she was sure the mattress was also a mess. The flow had slowed, and now stopped. He sat up slowly, looking at the clock. "I'm sorry, I forgot to tell you. I thought about your sleeping problem. I don't want you getting infections or straining your bladder, but I also don't want you waking me up every night. So I decided that you're a bedwetter now." Nikki stared at her husband in utter disbelief. For a moment she hadn't believed she heard him right. "What do you mean?" She said menacingly. He gave her a satisfied grin. "I think it's the solution that best satisfies both our needs." * It was already getting late. She was usually in bed by now, but she'd been putting this off as long as possible. But soon the midnight signal would come, and for the next six hours she would be effectively incontinent. With just thirty minutes to spare she was at the drug store looking at diapers. Last night was a miserable blur. After thoroughly drenching the bed, Master had told her to clean it up. And she'd tried, but every few minutes she discovered her bladder would dribble a bit, making more of a mess. Finally she'd had to work with a towel bunched between her legs. After she'd cleaned as best she could she'd tried to go sleep in the bathtub. He'd already gone back to sleep on the couch. When morning came the argument wasn't over, but it wasn't one she'd win. Standing in the bath she'd yelled at him as he got ready for work. He just listened, and simply told her that he wasn't going to change it. "That body isn't yours anymore. You don't control it. You gave it to me to control. You don't get a say in how I control it. Or if I decide not to." He'd said. She'd argued for a while longer, but nothing superseded that simple truth. When her anger had run down he finished the argument by granting her a free orgasm, the bastard. "You can cum, but you have to do it playing with that piss-soaked cunt." He's said then left her in the bathroom, still seething, and unwilling to concede that accepting his permission to cum didn't meant she accepted his decision. Nikki blushed at the memory as she pulled a package of Depends from the shelf. Maximum Protection seemed like the best option since she would have no retention at night from now on. But frankly she didn't know what any of that meant. She wanted to try the ones that were supposed to be like underwear, but those didn't seem like they would do for her problem. "Need help?" Nikki jumped, dropping the package. One of the pharmacy ladies in blue scrubs had come over to her while she was lost in thought. The diapers on the floor between them, Nikki was frozen, not sure what to say. She could feel her cheeks warm as her face turned bright red. The nurse leaned forward and put a comforting hand on her arm. "It's okay. It's not a big deal, hon. What do you need?" She bent down to pick up the package on the floor. "It… it's not… I don't know." Nikki stammered, looking down. "I… I can't hold it, at night." She felt tears in her eyes. "Like at all." She sighed, shutting her eyes tight forcing her tears back. "I understand," the nurse replied warmly, "It's okay. It's a common problem. I'm guessing this happened suddenly?" Nikki nodded. "Well, I can't say for certain, but usually when it happens like that it usually isn't permanent. Just until whatever's wrong gets better." She listened to the nurse silently thinking about just how long her husband would want to play this game. Getting on to a month now, and he seemed to be really happy with the whole thing. So who knows how long it would go. She felt a fresh wave of shame that it turned her on to know that. "Well, diapers like these are probably the best you can get here, but as I understand it, they're not great. They're cheap, and don't fit well so you can get leaks. So if it's a long term problem you may want to try a medical supply store or look online for a better brand. But these will work for now." Nikki nodded, "Thank you." "Here, let me ring you up." * Nikki woke to the sound of her husband getting ready for work. She realized that for the first time in years she'd slept completely through the night. The last few weeks had been hard, getting used to the new nighttime routine, waking up constantly worried about leaking. But after taking the pharmacy nurse's advice about getting a better brand of diaper, that just hadn't been an issue. So she no longer had a reason to get up in the middle of the night. For the first time she hadn't, and it was wonderful. If she were to be honest with herself, she actually liked the feel of a fresh diaper. Quite frankly the extra padding was comfy, and it was nice to know that everything was perfectly contained in the morning. With the first package that hadn't always been the case, and she'd felt nervous going to sleep. Under the covers she put a hand to the yellowed padding, and squished it against herself. And it was dirty. She'd never really been into watersports as it's own kink, but the humiliation of it, the idea of being subjected to it turned her on. Having to wear the full diaper, and being unable to stop herself from filling it every night turned her on despite herself. Having that bit of control denied to her by her Master, went to the very core of her perversion. Her rubbing became more rhythmic "God, you're such a slut." he said as he did up his tie. * Dammit! The second alarm on her phone sounded, and she was still trying to rush back home. She set up an alarm 20 minutes out to remind her that she would need a bathroom soon. The second alarm was five minutes out, and she usually took that to mean that she should make her way to the bathroom now. This was going to be close. She floored it through the yellow light hoping there were no cops around to see her speeding. Several turns, and an egregiously rolled through stop sign got her screeching to a stop in the driveway. She leapt out of the car and promptly tripped. Damn heels! She rolled got herself up and hustled to the front door, pulled the screen open fumbled with her keys before dropping them. She was clenching as best she could even knowing that it was useless. Resigned she bent to pick up the keys even as she felt the piss filling her jeans. Nikki just stood there waiting for it to stop. Cursing herself she tried to figure out how to get inside to clean up without making a bigger mess. * "Okay, I need you to stand" He said. Nikki was busy playing with her boobs, finally free after months from their steel prison. Her master was at her feet, slowly working the latex up her legs. She slid off the large crate with his help, but still leaning against the crate as he massaged the latex upwards, coaxing it over her skin with the baby powder. "Are you ready for this?" He asked as he stretched the rubber over her rump. He knelt down to make more adjustments, making sure that the gap over her crotch was seating properly. "I think so, Sir." He tugged the suit up further along her thighs before standing to to the same around her hips. "The whole weekend. That's a long time." He held a sleeve up and began scrunching it up so she could insert her hand into the glove. Her hand was a fist around a small ball wrapped in tape so she couldn't open it. Now it was being forced into the confines of a ball shaped latex glove, rendering it useless until he freed her. He did the same with her other hand, before working the tight material over her arms so the suit could wrap tightly, like a second skin over her torso. Nikki didn't want to think of the length of time. She shivered, trying to keep it out of her mind. Even once he had it wrapped around her it took time to adjust it right so he could start working the zip in the back. He struggled, and adjusted as he needed to, until finally the suit came to a close at the back of her neck. Her head, breasts, and crotch were the only things not encased in rubber. Dozens of rubber encased wires dangled from patches all over the suit. Surprisingly he kissed her. "I love you." He said. "Love you too." Nikki replied. He opened the crate to begin the next phase of her preparations. * The video was one of Nikki's favorite genres of porn, two well muscled guys making out. It was only the beginning of course, and she was anticipating watching them strip each other. She knew full well that they'd get raunchier and raunchier as time went on which was also good, but damn, she did love the simplicity of two guys kissing. The video cut out, to her disappointment. But cut back in to what looked like security camera footage. It was familiar to her since she'd seen that view many times. It was the spare bedroom, empty except for a large wooden crate with a cabinet attached to one side. A figure moved into view, it was of a young woman that it took Nikki a moment to recognize. When she did, she wanted to curse; she hated it when her husband dated his nurses. Minerva, that was her name. Minerva turned around, "Is she really in there?" The audio cut in. Her husband moved into view, "Oh yes. She's in there, completely immobile, completely unable to control her body. Well almost." "Oh god that's so hot." The girl said, hopping up on top of the crate. Nikki heard, and felt the shift. Master opened the cabinet. "This is how I control her." The nurse stared wide eyed, "It's surprisingly empty." she said. "Well, I still don't have a viable way for her to defecate properly, though we recently solved the urine issue. Overall it's got room for supplies that I could keep her trapped for a month or more. But we still have a lot of work to make that happen. " "How would you keep her muscles from atrophy for that long?" "I've got a muscle stimulation system in the computer connected to patches all over her body which will work for a while, and since this is supposed to be both pleasure and torture, I'm working on different exercise routines for her. As well I try to keep her stimulated in other ways." "I can guess." With legs crossed, and hands on the edge of the crate, she leaned forward to kiss her date. "Do you think she can hear us?" "Oh I know she can. She wears a gasmask that I modified. It organizes her tubes pretty well for one thing, and–" "Tubes?" "Yeah," he said pointing at the cabinet. "See she's got the breather here, and that's her feeding and water line. The mask guides those tubes, and a couple others from the rest of her body into the cabinet. But there's also some wires I set up to a VR headset." "Oh wow!" "Yeah, most of the time she's watching porn of some kind. I've got like six terabytes on there and I keep adding to it." He pointed to the computer at the bottom of the cabinet. "But it will also stream video from the household cameras. Which is what she's seeing now." "You mean she's watching us?" "And listening." "Oh god I wanna fuck! Right here right now, on top of your wife!" He laughed. "All in good time." He said, closing the cabinet. "I'm also wearing a button cam that I'll upload later showing her our date. She'll like that." "You know, when you first said 'I'm packing my wife away for the weekend' I had a totally different idea of what that meant." The video cut out again. Nikki was left in blackness for a moment until a new porno turned on. It wasn't the muscle boys making out, instead it was an old video of a huge breasted woman in white satin panties getting done up in shiny metal bondage. * The house video cut in again. This time the view was of the bedroom. Green text popped up in the corner of her view, "Pleasure/Pain sequence 42b - Start" There was a shock to her nipples, and Nikki jumped. But the rubber phallus buried deep inside her began to hum. The suction pumps began tugging on her tits and clit. Her husband and his lover were tangled up in the sheets. Their movements were slow, Nikki was a little disappointed, thinking they'd already fucked. "Oh she absolutely loves this. She's a huge perv. She gets off on bondage, humiliation, degradation, gross stuff that no normal person would get off on." He said with a glance to the camera. "I'm surprised you're so curious." "Well to be honest your wife comes off as rather prim and proper. You wouldn't think it to look at her that she'd be into all this stuff. Or watching her husband have affairs." She said nuzzling his chest, and wrapping her legs around his. "I mean I like her, she always seems so kind and caring, but also… reserved." "Kind and Kinky are not mutually exclusive. And we both put on a pose because I have to be professional for the sake of my reputation as a doctor." "What I mean is that it's so sexy to be living this double life." "She doesn't– We don't live a double life, we live the life we want to live, we just make sure to keep the parts that should be private, private." He looked down at his lover, "I work very hard to give her the life she wants. In many ways she didn't know it was what she wanted, but it is." "You make it sound like you don't." "Oh, I get a lot of what I want." He said with a smile. "But one of the things I want to do is have sex with my wife. But in order to live the life we want, I have to sacrifice that. I keep her in a chastity belt, I deny her access to sexual release which means I can't use her in ways that I really would like to. I do that among many other things, because instead of fucking all the time, we're making love." "This is you making love? Her trapped in a box while you fuck other women?" "Strange isn't it?" She climbed on top of him. "Everyone's got their thing. Right now I've got yours, and I know just what I want to do with it." She leaned forward to kiss him, his hands cupped her ass. "You work so hard to give her what she wants. I guess I'll have to make sure you get what you want." Nikki saw her husband enter his girlfriend while his machine punished her body. She could do nothing to stop the torment, so she focused on the pleasure. She focused on their pleasure, on their lovemaking, feeling it in herself even as the vibrating dick thrust into her out of time with their rhythm. She wanted to feel him in her once again. More than a month gone since he'd done it last, who knew how long until he did it again. She watched their lovemaking, the teasing, and the playfulness of it. Even as it fed her own desires she scoffed at its simplicity. She loved the traps he set for her, the helplessness of his contraptions. She enjoyed his toys as they punished her body. Their motions began to build, their moans reaching a higher pitch. The noise of their sex reinforcing the building sensations in her own climax. She saw her Master buck as his lover rode him hard, pressing her tits into his face. The woman fucked him hard, screaming as she came to her own conclusion. The artificial dick pumped into Nikki, and the mild stimulations over her body kicked into high gear as she felt herself nearing her own long awaited orgasm. She could feel the satisfaction of knowing she would join her Master and his lover in the intensity of their mutual stimulation. A hard shock passed through her tits. The dildo stopped pumping. A cry of frustration died in her throat from the tubes that kept her breathing. Before she could reach it his system had killed another orgasm. For a moment she could swear he'd glanced at the camera, a taunting smirk on his lips. But no, he turned to his lover once more before the feed went dark.
  3. Why do you necessarily need a retrieval string? Couldn't you poke a hole at the end of the stent large enough for a small crochet hook to grab it and pull it out? In a perfect world I would see this as being a wire reinforced just to make sure the plastic didn't break. But with that kind of design the stent wouldn't need to be that long. Or am I wrong?
  4. Maybe this is the wrong place for this, but is it wierd that I don't want to be incontinent? Yes I have a fetish for diapers. Yes I have a humiliation fetish that gets sprung every time I have an accident. But I would rather be in control and indulge the fetishes when I want, not the other way around. Gettig what I physically desire is not the same thing as getting what I want.
  5. It's definitely not wet dreams. We've been living together for a while; we sleep separately out of habit mostly. We have a D/s relationship, and she's in control of all my emissions. I have had the occasionaly wet dream because of this, but that is definitely not what is going on here. We picked one up about two months ago. I had really mixed feelings about it because in part it was the first real admission that the problem wasn't going away. But it was the only protection I was really comfortable with getting. But the idea that I need it is embarrassing, which then turns me on which begins the feedback loop. I don't think having it's made anything worse. I'm not so much worried about the diaper fetish overwhelming me either. It's always been secondary to other fetishes, and I think the real turn on is the humiliation factor of the whole thing. I don't think it's the diaper fetish driving the bedwetting either.
  6. About six months ago I started bedwetting out of the blue. It's never really been a problem for me, even as a kid. But I've been under a lot of stress lately, and I think it started as a stress reaction. The problem is that it hasn't gone away. My stress has been up and down, but the occurrance seems to remain pretty regular (once every two weeks, more or less). I've seen doctors, and they can't find anything physically wrong. A urologist told me that he thinks I'm perfectly healthy and that it should go away on its own. He gave me a perscription that should help, and I'm still waiting to see how that is working. What bothers me about it, other than the obvious worries is that I'm a pretty kinky guy. I have a humiliation and diaper fetish among others. And right now nothing is more humiliating to me than waking to a wet bed. Or having to tell my girlfriend about it. We live together, but sleep seperately. But that also gives me a hit on that humiliation meter. So I end up in the middle of the night gathering my sheets with a hard on and feeling really guilty about it. I'm afraid that what is happening to me, the reason it isn't going away is because when I wet the bed, the arousal I feel at the situation is positively reinforcing the behavior. I don't even know if that makes sense or not. I've been tempted to get diapers to wear at night, but I'm afraid that will just make things worse. I feel guilty about it because I feel like getting them is partly just to feed the fetish. If it is to feed the fetish, wouldn't that just encourage the wetting? My girlfriend has been very supportive since this all started. But she definitely doesn't like diapers. We've talked about the fetish before, and it's just not her thing. We play in other ways, and our relationship is pretty great. I'm afraid that if this never gets better or gets worse it will start affecting the relationship. Part of the reason I don't want to get the diapers is because I don't want to bother her. I'm frustrated, confused and a little conflicted.