AZbearlover

Don't you think it's kind of a big leap from my posting about using it once for the first time ever to think that I am on a path of abusing laxatives? Magnesium citrate has been recommended online as an alternative otc solution to colonics for colon health. Unless I gave you some indication that I was planning on using it once a week or once a month or even biyearly then maybe you are overreacting? The truth is, I play around with some sort of suppository / laxative once a year maybe. I thought I'd share my experience so others can know what to expect but instead I get jumped on by people with messages bordering on "you are irresponsible for what you did. what you did was so dangerous and thoughtless." Well guess what? We are all adults here and we are on a diaper fetish forum where people sometimes experiment with different things like catheters or enemas or laxatives or marshmallows or oatmeal to increase their experience.

Well it is an otc medicine so it doesn't need to be prescribed. In my store its next to to dulcolax, exlax, fleet suppositories, milk of magnesia, etc.

Had a free day to myself so I thought I'd take and document the effects of Magnesium Citrate for any interested parties. This was my first time experimenting with it and I did no fiber bulking or anything like that.

Hey all. Was wondering if anyone had recommendations for companies or brands to contain the smell when messing. I have some loose fitting plastic pants but they dont seem to help much. Thanks.

I still have issues like this because I switch on and off with 24/7 wearing to using the urinal. With the hourly bathroom trips, I actually consider myself slightly urge incontinent (especially since two-three years ago I could hold for 4-6 hours at a time) so if anyone asks I can say I have control but it's spotty. I do however have a long walk to the bathroom where a very tightnit group of coworkers can see me with my messenger bag. A few of them have asked if I was heading out or where I was going before and I always provide dodgy answers so I'm sure they know something is up.

First off a quick update, haven't been 24/7 for a few months again due to summer heat but as with my previous posts when I wasn't 24/7, I can only hold for 30-40 minutes before rushing to the bathroom. If I drink coffee that number drops to 15-20. I'm getting back into 24/7 again for 3rd time and just gonna ride the wave and wear when I want and not wear when I don't want (mostly because I crash and burn every summer with 120F weather and staying active with hiking). Anyway during the last sessions of wearing for 5 months, and since then wearing off and on I've gotten comfortable peeing in any position. Sitting, laying back, laying side, laying stomach, driving, walking, etc. If I don't wear at night I usually have to get up at night once time a week to empty my bladder. Well one night last week I woke up and was on the very urge of peeing upon waking. I decided to wear the next night to be safe and I woke up the next morning wet. Since then consistently every night I've either briefly woke while wetting or woke up wet the next morning. Kind of crazy and unexpected since I wasn't 24/7 a week ago, but I'm ok with it and have been drinking extra to positively reinforce the behavior, maintain consistency and hopefully habitually wet the bed.

Its hard to say. I don't think so but I'm sure my pants were puffy from the diapers and I was bending over a lot when I was sitting on wood logs to get heat from the fire so if someone looked at my waistband area they might have seen the diaper. Overall I would say most people probably didn't know.

Well back from my trip. While hiking in and out in them wasn't too bad comfort/temperature-wise and I was able to manage the smell with wipes, the weight of taking wet diapers out quickly added up. I only had three used disposables in my pack by the time I left (two Abenas, and 1 molicare super plus with a guard in it) but I estimated that it added 5-7 pounds to my pack weight based on the fact that I started with a 32 pound pack, ate all the food and drank all the water and measured only with my gear and trash/diapers that I brought out of the area. The hike in and out took about 3 hours each and I estimate I stayed on the campsite for about 20 hours with equated to a change about once every 5 hours. The hike in was super wet and I almost needed to change before arrival at the camp site but as I got ready for a change and started veering from the group a bit we had all arrived. Getting away for changes when everyone was set up was effortless. I usually grabbed a diaper from my pack, brought it a few hundred feet from camp and changed. One time I did change in my tent while everyone was at the firepit laughing and joking. Toward the end of the night I didn't wet much though that morning I wet a lot again. I also got a very strange heat/chafing rash on my left hip. I have the standard red bumps from a heat rash (which was unexpected because the weather was quite cool), but it seems my backpacking waist belt was chafing it causing what looks like spider or insect bites with the center of each elevated dot being very red. It wasn't a terrible experience overall, but was certainly a lot of hoops to jump through for backpacking. Now back to day to day life for a while

2/19/2012 I've been in diapers 24/7 for three weeks now (started circa Feb 1st). Since I stopped wearing 24/7 in my last entries, I had been wearing as often as possible with the exception of hiking. I picked up a new job and have been wearing every day on the job. My new boss has already asked why I bring a backpack to the bathroom but upon not giving a straight answer he stopped probing. I've switched from Tranquility Contour Boosters to Tena Ultimate Pads/Stuffers for now. It makes it very easy to put a pad in my pocket and bring it to the bathroom to change than to bring an entire backpack. It's taken some getting used to however. It doesn't absorb super fast and one time at work I flooded accidentally and leaked heavily into my pants. Sometimes if I'm not aimed in the right direction I can miss the pad completely and aim into the side of my diaper and require a change in the end. I also found another deal on craigslist in the last week. 96 Tranquility Slim Lines and 112 Tena Supers for 100 dollars total (about .40 cents per diaper). The deal was ok, but the Tena Super aren't plastic backed and the cotton in it can fall apart once its wet so I am not completely satisfied with the transaction, but it was my lack of knowledge of Tena that is to blame. I assumed it would be plastic backed. The Tranquility Slimlines are ok but they are louder than my Molicare and also don't hold up quite as well. As far as bodily changes go, I've kept my sphincter relaxed for about 3 weeks (while awake) now and letting it go when needed. At work I have a bit of anxiety about getting caught or smelling of urine so I need to train myself to relax a bit more and not get tense due to the anxiety. At night last night I reinstalled my bed pad and woke up around 2am to wet the bed (diaper) while laying down. (I've been practicing peeing in the prone position in the mornings) I've also been listening to hypnosis again while gaming. I figured at night when I listened to it, historically it was more erotic than hypnotic so maybe having it play in the background while I'm focused on gaming will reinforce some of the ideas on a subconscious level. I've looped probably 3 or 4 times through 10-12 files and most of them I still don't know exactly what the scripts are. I also started taking Nullo again. I'm not sure if I'll stick with it or not but I've had strong urges to mess my diapers recently. Cumulative stat estimates for last 3 weeks: Diapers: 63 Stuffers: 42 Leaks: 1 major leak at work, 1 major leak at home and anytime I pee a disposable while laying down and my penis pointed up basically Rashes: 1 or 2 razor rashes 2/21/2012 Today I feel like I reached a higher level of understanding on the "think-feel-do" continuum. Multiple times (though not always) today I started urinating without feeling it coming or trying to get into a suitable position. This included getting up, sitting down, walking, bending over, and while sitting or standing. It felt like something clicked like "If I'm incontinent I'm not supposed to get into a position but I'm supposed to go anywhere, anytime" and that idea I guess just hit home in a way that it never did before once I started doing that today. I will practice this further and I feel like as I practice more it'll become more easy and become more comfortable and I'll start down the slippery slope toward incontinence once more as I did when I first started this journal. 3/20/2012 So I guess its been about 8 weeks now. I find myself wetting without thinking too much about it. I still seem to feel when Im about the empty, but there was at least one time in particular with friends that I was in a fresh diaper and when I got home it was wet but I don't know when I wet it. I haven't been able to replicate that yet. My streams are small and consistent, though I've noticed myself urinating significantly more in the mornings then in the afternoons at work. I am usually waking up at least once a night to empty my bladder without any alarms due to it being full. About 1 night out of every 7, I sleep the whole night without emptying it which I consider a setback. Sometimes I can wet completely lying down on my stomach or back but sometimes I need to just lift my head and shoulders a bit. I'm sure that block is all mental and not physical at all. If I'm naked I'm dripping on the floor or wherever. I haven't dripped more than an ounce or so when not diapered but most of my streams are that short these days even when diapered. I have been hiking multiple times in diapers but its been cool out 60-80F so it hasn't been too much of a burden. This summer I may just need to hibernate from the heat. I have a group backpacking trip coming up that will last two days. My pack weight is going to suffer from diapering supplies and soiled diapers on the way back but I look back at my 4-6 month hiatus with great regret and since I only haven't worn for hiking it seems that my decision to wear 24/7 again seems right. While I'm only at about 2 months in, in many ways I feel like I picked up right where I left off. The mental conditioning and confidence in my diapers has helped immensely. I think the biggest change is that my bladder is somewhat stronger again from my break. I have tried two Dry 24/7 samples from a friend. The first one was fine even though I swim in them (30 inch waist, I could actually get the front wings all the way to my butt and they stick out of my pants by at least an inch even when I tuck them in) but the second one caused a major leak at work just 30 minutes before a department wide meeting. On top of that it was on a Monday and I forgot to repack my supply back. Luckily I had one diaper and two guards in it so I barely scraped through the day with those supplies. I had taken my spare back of diapers out of my trunk when I stopped 24/7 in July so I couldn't fall back on that either. Needless to say after that close call I will be much more careful and have replaced my car backup supply. 3/27/12 The last two days I've noticed a big shift in my urination habits. Instead of wetting once every 15 minutes or so, I seem to be wetting in drops every 5 to 10 minutes. I bet each wetting is less than an ounce. I have wet while with my boss, in meetings, while walking, shopping, etc. A few times I have realized I was wetting after I started. At night I've woken up 2-3 times every night because I can't seem to hold it any longer. While I fear this is negatively effecting my sleeping habits over the long term, it aids with the loss of bladder control. I have wet on my back and stomach with minimal effort. It was about time to purchase pads again yesterday since I'm almost out but luckily a new DL I've met who lives less than a block away (what a small world!) gave me some Abenas to try. I have not used these before but after two days of wearing Abena's at work and having them last 8-10 hours without a change or a stuffer I bought two cases without a second thought. Assuming they don't change their "recipe", they may have found a lifetime follower in me. I spent 90 dollars total, and considering I spend 40 dollars a month on stuffers alone, I think this is a good alternative. I don't have statistics per say but I'm wearing 1-3 diapers a day with the Abenas. Usually 1 Abena, 1 Molicare/Tranquility after work, and a Tena Super at night. If it's just Molicares during the day its about 2-4 changes. No rashes recently and except for the Dry 24/7 leak, my pants have been dry. Life is good. 4/5/12 In the two weeks I have progressively been wetting more and more and not realizing I was urinating until after I started. This last week I've noticed my streams last longer than normal and have greater intervals between them, maybe every 30 minutes or so. Most times I'm so busy at work focusing on the task at hand that by 12pm I realize my diaper is pretty wet but can't really remember the individual instances where I've been wetting. I guess in the 12MDTP the author was talking about a catch-22 where you eventually want to wet without thinking about it but to get there you need to think about it and train on relaxing. Well it seems I'm there. Certainly that doesn't mean I can't stop myself if I wanted, I think still have strong capacity as I am still sleeping through a few nights of the week and not waking to wet at all until the morning. Anyway backpacking trip this weekend. Will keep everyone posted. I'm packing for the trip tonight.

@bernie - I'm still going for urinary incontinence even during the summer even though 120F with a plastic backed diaper sucks. I'm wearing 24/7 again so if I need to pee on the trail I just go. I recently (read: this Monday) learned how to pee while hiking at a fast pace without stopping or getting into a certain position. Was kind of neat. On my first big backpacking trip while 24/7, I plan on bringing 7 diapers for 2 days. I'll just need to cut other supplies to make room for the dry diapers in and the soiled diapers out. If I need to poop I'll need to find a spot in the woods as I wood if I wasn't wearing diapers. Generally on backpacking trips they are deep in the woods/forest/desert so there won't be restrooms or trash cans for many many miles. Many places actually don't have trash cans at their trailhead restrooms either, just glorified portajons. Will let you all know how it goes.

I tried a few samples of the medium (also 150 lb about 30-31 inch waist). At first I was impressed by the absorbency even though size-wise it came past my belly button. Then I wore another sample to work and after two wettings, when I wet a third time it completely leaked out of the leg band 100%, soaking my pants just 30 minutes before a department meeting. Again it seems to be a size related issue. Anyway I tried some Abenas after that and they fit a lot better and most work days I don't need to change for 8-10 hours in one diaper (and thats without a stuffer, wow!).

Personally out of all the suggestions, I found the Diaper Dependence files (4 in total) to be the most in line the 12 month program/with losing control over time versus "in this very moment you'll forget how to lose bladder control" forever, which I don't find realistic or viable for most people. I personally have listened to hypnosis for weeks continuously and have had little to no results from it.

Saturday I'll be heading on a 2 day backpacking trip to Northern Arizona with a group of ~10-15 people. Will be going 5 miles into the forest (1500 ft elevation gain). I'll be 24/7 the whole time. The extra weight in and out from diapers will suck but I think it might be manageable. I'll post how it goes since when I first quit 24/7, I quit because I couldn't find a lot of material out there about people who are active and incontinent. As it is, since January I've managed weekly 1-6 hour hikes wearing 24/7, but this will be my first time where I know I'll need to change in my tent or away from the campsite with others around and no trailhead bathroom. The good news is the weather will be 30-60F so at least I won't be hiking in 120F weather like when I was hiking last summer, at least not yet.

The two Molicares I've tried are Super Plus and Air Active (both size small). I find the tapes on the Super Plus are good and they have good fit, are full plastic, and are a quiet crinkle. They last 2-3 hours without a stuffer for me. The Air Actives are thinner but seem to hold just as much, the fit is terrible though and they seem to come loose at the waist no matter how tight I try and make them. On top of that, every single Air Active I've worn has ripped the tapes due to an elastic component to them that just wears down really fast. If I sleep in one, I wake up to an entire side of ripped tapes. I advise against buying these.

I was on the 12 month program for 4 months and wrote in great detail about what I was feeling physically and mentally and I also kept statistics on the diapers/day, leaks/per, rashes, costs, what to buy, what not to buy, etc. A lot of people who read it found my end month summaries to be useful. After I stopped, I wore often for 5-6 months, and for the last 2-3 I've been back in diapers 24/7. I'm at the point where 2-4 days out of the week I don't even notice when I'm wetting or I notice after I've started wetting. I'm not incontinent yet but that's the plan.